Tequila Sunset: A Military Erotic Romance (Sexy Siesta Series Book 2) (5 page)

She wrapped her arms around herself, worrying her lower lip. “True, but he seemed to have a beef with you military boys more.”

She’d seen the hatred in the darkness of the other man’s eyes tonight. Something was off there and it looked more and more as though she’d made a mistake in asking Bougainvillea as her date to Lucas’s wedding.

Gabe nodded. “Looks like the man has a few issues and something to prove. He won’t get that chance as long as I’m next to you.” Gabe moved over to her and softly curled a single finger under her chin. “And, precious, you’re not going anywhere without me. I’ll never let anyone hurt you, Ema.” Her breath caught and her body hummed with anticipation at his tender touch. He sealed his words with a kiss. Lightly at first then he took it deeper.

Her head cautioned her against promises, but her heart swelled with relief. Like two opposing angels on her shoulders, her head quickly jumped to override her heart’s desires.
He’s dedicated to the uniform, not you, chica.
Military men had their duties. Love was secondary.

“You ready to go rock ’n roll?”

Chapter Five

Twenty minutes and a couple of shots of Mexican gold later, Ema was pretty damn sure there was no problem in the world tequila couldn’t solve. She didn’t intend to get drunk, but she needed something to dull the tension knotting her nerves.

While Gabriel made his calls to his CO stateside, she’d showered off the soot and was wide awake at some ungodly hour with an eight-hour road trip ahead of her come morning. That was another thing. She couldn’t leave Gabe here by himself to find out what tonight was all about. Not to mention, she wanted answers, too.

“I can see that pretty mind of yours clocking in some overtime. Worried ‘bout what happened tonight?” Gabriel walked up behind her and placed the cell down before resting his hands on her hips. She leaned against his bare shoulder causing the sheet she had wrapped around her to loosen around her breasts. “Hmmmm…lovely.”

Always a flirt. She nodded. “Just thinking about my trip back.”

Gabe’s chest rose and fell with a deep sigh. “Can I offer you another option?”

Ema turned to face him. Streaks of moonlight poured through the window to cast a pale light over his features. Dimmed sconces complemented the low lighting.

Half of his face remained in shadow, but nothing could hide the hope in his eyes. One thing was for sure though—the man wore sexiness and protectiveness with a touch of broodiness like a second skin.

Wistful thoughts flitted across her mind at what it would be like to wake up to a man like Gabriel every morning.

No, she corrected herself. She didn’t want any other man. She wanted
him
. All six feet plus of sexy muscle rounded out with a sweet heart. But she couldn’t have him. Not truly one hundred percent. Memories of the pain her mother suffered slammed on the brakes to her runaway heart, and the promise he’d made. Gabe was like her father, married to the military.

She wasn’t strong enough to let him get close to her, and she knew Gabriel wouldn’t take anything less.

“There’s that look again. The one that says I’ve lost you, only you haven’t left.” His hand came out to trace along her shoulder and arm.

“You know this can’t happen, Gabe. We can’t do this.” Her voice, barely above a whisper, conveyed all her hurt. “I can’t let my heart continue to guide me while in my head, I know misery is only a matter of when and not if.”

His hand stilled against her arm. Sliding out of his touch, she leaned forward on the kitchen counter, tracing her fingers along the rough edges of the pineapple her cousin favored.

“You’re counting me out? Why? Where do you think I’m going, Esmeralda?”

“That’s just it, Gabriel.” Fear knotted in her stomach. She’d never admitted this to anyone before. “I don’t know when you’re going, coming, or if you’ll ever come back. If an
us
were even possible, I couldn’t live on the edge of not knowing all the time.”

“Ema baby, how can you survive like that? Never letting the people that love you close enough to touch your heart?”

“It’s all I know, Gabriel.”

“You mean it’s all your mother taught you.” He eased her around with a gentle hand. Truth blazed down at her when their connected gazes. “Don’t let someone else’s past dictate your future. That’s no way to live. Baby, I might wear a uniform, and yes, there’s no removing the fact that my job is dangerous—”

She stiffened. “Don’t treat me like I’m naïve. Dangerous is a gross understatement, Gabriel.” Her voice cracked.
Diablos.

With his shirt off there was no hiding the truth of her statement. “I can count three bullet holes in you, and that’s not counting the other scars. I’d say dangerous is putting it mildly.”

“Ema,” he said her name in that low voice that always affected her. She took a deep breath to steel against it. “You’re searching for something that doesn’t exist. Safety…it’s a perception. An illusion, at best, sweetheart. No one’s really safe. As a child I wasn’t, and there’s no guarantee I’ll be safe tomorrow either.”

He moved in, bracing himself on the counter, locking her in his embrace. His warmth surrounded her, trapped her against his hard body. She gulped in air, taking in everything he was—strength and honesty. He made loving him so hard to resist. Coming here tonight with him was the ultimate test to her resistance, and she was failing. And for all that was holy, it was becoming harder and harder to remember why that was such a bad thing.

Gazes locked, he continued in a huskier voice than before. “I could walk out of here and be hit by lightning. Safety can’t be promised in or out of the uniform. I think Bougainvillea proved that tonight.”

She rested her hands on his bare chest. His dog tags hanging between them a solitary reminder. “I don’t know how, Gabe. I always tell myself that what we have is enough. The occasional rendezvous and late-night phone calls are all I need.”

“Let me be very clear here, Esmeralda.” Her full name rolled of his tongue as if he’d spoken Spanish his entire life. “I’ll never be satisfied just taking you to bed. And the phone calls, well, those were my needing to hear your voice, if nothing else.” Her heart warmed a fraction more to his confession. “This friends-with-benefits shit is not what I really want. I want what’s under here.” Gabe rested a hand on her heart, nestling her cheek in the palm of his other hand. Heat gathered in her core and worked its way into a full-body flush. She couldn’t move if she wanted to. “The lovemaking will always be there as long as I hold your heart, precious.”

His gaze never wavered as he spoke. “The uniform…” he shrugged “…it’s who I am, baby. It gave me a second chance at something when no one else cared. It defines me. Proves that while I’m not the biggest badass of ‘em all, I sure as hell walk among them. So when I lace up, and snap and pop for my CO, I do it with pride. But one thing the uniform—and this ink on my arm—doesn’t show, is the heart that beats for only you, Ema.”

She looked into the depths of his eyes and saw the truth. She’d never heard Gabe speak so much at one time, and that fact brought a smile to her face. He cared enough to lay it all on the line.

“
Como
, Gabriel? How do you make it sound so easy, so right, while I feel like I am breaking inside? I saw the fear in my mother’s eyes every day and the heartache that crippled her.

Gabe shook his head, frustration etched in the creases of his eyes. “That fear is not yours. It was your mother’s. Love never follows a rulebook. You decide, just like I decided I wouldn’t be my father.” He rested his forehead against hers and let out a soft sigh. “Stop running from what you feel. I can’t promise easy, but it hurts because you’re fighting the current.”

She worried her lower lip, running her fingers along his chest, unable to resist his nearness “So, when did you know?”

“I think you know the answer, precious.” He lowered his lips to the shell of her ear, “I whispered it to you six months ago as you lay awake in my arms.”

“Oh.” She blushed, recalling the night and her actions. “Then I ran out as soon as you fell asleep.”

He caught her chin and tilted her head up. “But there’s something you don’t realize, baby. You wouldn’t have run if you didn’t feel the same way.”

He lowered his lips to hers. Warm, tender and so full of love.

He straightened. “Resisting only makes it worse. You have to be strong enough to take what you want in this life, fucking grab on with both hands…and never let go. Don’t let fear of the unknown take you away from a happiness that’s right in front of you. A happiness I want to give you. The decision is yours, but don’t think for a second I’ll stop trying to convince you that we’re perfect for each other.”

Ema sighed and moved away. “There’s something else you need to know, Gabriel. I invited Bougainvillea to the wedding as my plus one because my business is going under and I have no way of keeping Mia in school.” She pulled her hair back then crossed her arms. “He was the last hope I had of saving…well, everything.” Tears stung the back of her eyes but she held it together. Barely.

Banked curiosity was revealed in the set of his shoulders and tilt of his head. She pushed forward anyway. “I have to head back to San Diego and figure out what I’m going to do with the flower shop before an us even has a chance. Then I have to deal with Mia’s tuition and...” She dropped into a chair, letting her weight slide halfway down into the cushioned high back, gripping the sheet tighter around her chest.

Gabe pulled over a matching chair and carved out a place in her personal space. “Do you think an
us
can happen, Ema?” He gave tenacity a run for its money, she’d allow him that much.

“I’ve never had much luck with wishing, Gabriel.”

He nodded and sat forward, placing a hand on her sheet-clad thigh. “How much do you know about Bougainvillea?”

“I know he and my mother grew up close but drifted apart like friends do sometimes. During her more lucid moments, she’d talk to me about him from time to time, and more so when she was close to the end. She missed the
tiempos antiguas
, you know, the old days when…” she looked down to her hands in her lap “… when my father was still alive.” The knot harbored in her belly since the fire tightened a notch further and unsettled the tequila they’d shared earlier. “It always boiled down to him. She couldn’t find the strength for me or for Mia because, according to her my mother, her heart only had room for one.” She shook her head, still unable to understand the reasoning of an alcoholic. “Can you imagine a mother saying that to her daughters?” Her shoulders shook and her chest clamped from the pressure of all the pain she held deep inside her.

Gabriel rested his hand on her interlocked ones. “So why did you go to him for help? Why not your family or even me?”

“Who, Gabriel? Besides Mia, Lucas is the only family left and how could I ask him for twenty grand? With the wedding and everything, I can’t ask him for money. And why not Bougainvillea? He’s been a family friend for years and I think you know he has enough money to have at least considered my offer.”

“Which was?”

“A partnership. And if he helped me go international, it had a lot of potential for both of us. Mia helped me run the numbers. With his help we could be global within five years.”

“No doubt he would have helped you go international for sure, sweetheart. Right into his backyard and under his thumb.”

She cocked her head to the side in question. “What the hell does that mean?”

“One little detail your mother left out of her stories, or hell, maybe she didn’t know. Your Bougainvillea is a business man all right. One that leans on the power of murder and intimidation. He’s a drug lord wanted not only in the US but also in Mexico.”

Esmeralda stared, unable to believe what she’d just heard.
Que! No! Diablos!
She groaned inwardly.

Ema swallowed against the bile burning the back of her throat. How could she be so stupid? So trusting. Her mother had talked about the boy she’d known, but the man she didn’t almost killed Ema and Gabriel tonight. She rested her head in her hands. “You must think I’m so stupid.”

“No, precious, just desperate, and I understand that more than you think. But you could have come to me for help. Doesn’t matter what you need, all you had to do was ask.” It broke her heart to hear the pain in his words.

She straightened in her chair. He looked at her with so much feeling, so much love it took her breath away. But there was hurt there too, and she’d put it there.

“For years my father shunned me. I could never make the bastard happy no matter what. Took me fucking years to erase what the SOB did to me from my memory.” He sliced the air between them with a swift move of his hand. “But when you do it…” He pulled back from her, breaking the contact. Her breath hitched and her heart fell. God, she felt like such an ass now. She’d never intended to hurt him and she ached for the boy who’d never known the love of his father. At least she had, even if for a few short years.

She took a deep breath, fighting the raw emotions threatening to override her good sense. Gabe continued to stare as if he saw the inner war she struggled with. She worried her lower lip, unable to break away from the power in his gaze.

“Why didn’t you let me in, let me help, Ema?”

She wrestled her emotions into check, desperate to clamp the lid shut.

If she let herself need him, where would that leave her? Them? The firm lines she worked hard to maintain between them would be blurred, and her clear-cut path to keeping her heart secure would no longer be safe to travel.

“Because I felt it was my duty to do what was needed for my family.” A single tear escaped down her cheek. He sat forward, his attention locked fully on her. It was all she could do not to let the dam burst open from the understanding she saw in his eyes.

He cupped her cheeks between warm, calloused hands. “My family, too, Ema. If you’ll allow me a place in your heart, and your life, I want to be there for you.” She melted at his words. Her tough-built Marine had a soft heart beneath all that muscle.

She kissed his jaw. The day’s stubble tickled her lips, and she smiled. No way she’d ever tell him how much she loved his rougher side.

Or how much she would miss it.

Ema pushed up from the chair.” I need to get dressed and back to San Diego, Gabriel. This isn’t your mess to fix.” She moved to the stairs. Hopefully, Lucas’s wife had something here that would fit her and she could get the hell out.