Temporary Bride (14 page)

He uttered a strangled sound as he reached out and pulled
her down to lie against him. "Don't, Karen. Oh, sweetheart, don't cry.
I can't stand it!"

Her sobs continued unrestrained as she snuggled into his
arms, and his hands caressed her. Finally she spoke into his shoulder.
"I know you don't want me but I have to be here. I'd go crazy back at
the house wondering how you are, if you were being well cared for."

His lips teased her hair. "Don't want you? You know better
than that. After all, there's no way I can hide how much I want you."

He molded her to the contours of his body, only the
bedclothes between them.

She tipped her head back and looked at him. "Then why?"

He guided her head back to his shoulder and said, "Because
I'd finally steeled myself to leave you and every mile I put between us
was like a knife twisted in my guts. I rammed the car into that tree
because I was literally blind with grief and didn't see the curve." She
gasped but he continued. "I knew if I gave in to my need for you and
asked you to come I wouldn't have the strength to send you away again."

She smiled and nuzzled her parted lips in the hollow of
his throat causing him to shiver with pleasure. "I'm glad because I
don't intend to be sent away. Not until we've fulfilled the purpose of
this marriage, which, in case you've forgotten, is to have a baby."

"I haven't forgotten," he murmured, "but just because I
want you more than I've ever wanted any other woman doesn't alter the
fact that it won't last. I'm neither capable of nor interested in a
long-lasting relationship with any one woman, and you are no exception.
By the time you have conceived and borne a child I will be anxious to
terminate the marriage. That was our agreement and it stands. I'll give
you financial security in abundance, but that's all. Are you sure you
understand?"

Karen would have agreed to anything. She'd nearly lost him
twice today, first when he walked out on her, and then in the
automobile accident. Now all she wanted was to stay as close to him as
she could get for as long as he would allow.

She could hear his heart hammering under her ear and she
moved herself up until her face was level with his on the pillow. She
cupped his cheeks in her hands and covered his mouth with her own. His
arms tightened around her and he held the back of her head with his
hand so she couldn't pull away as his response told her more eloquently
than words ever could of his desire for her. Her fingers probed the
edges of the bandage as she whispered against his mouth. "I understand,
Shane. I promise not to make demands."

He buried his face in the scented softness of her neck and
murmured, "I'm glad you came. If you hadn't I would have sent for you
in spite of all my good intentions. I couldn't have helped myself. Oh
Karen, I want you so much!"

She held him and stroked his bandaged head as his words
flooded her with a quiet joy. He couldn't leave her any more than she
could leave him. There was a bond between them that was too strong to
be denied.

She caressed his dark hair with her lips as she asked,
"How badly are you hurt? Is it serious?"

"They say I have a mild concussion but except for a
monstrous headache and a tendency to be violently sick every so often
I'm fine."

"Some fine," she grumbled as their lips met again. His
mouth clung to hers with hungry insistence and they were both so
engrossed in
the
kiss that neither of them heard the door open until a squeal from
behind got their attention.

A heavyset middle-aged nurse stood by the door, her face
stiff with disapproval. There was a suggestion of outrage in her voice
as she said, "Really, Mr. McKittrick, we can't allow this type of
thing." Her eyes shifted to Karen. "You'll have to get off the bed,
miss. I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to leave; Mr. McKittrick is not
supposed to have visitors."

Karen started to move away but Shane held her close as he
said, "The lady is my wife and she's staying right here."

The nurse looked startled as she muttered, "Oh, well, she
can remain but she'll have to stay off the bed; it's against hospital
rules."

"I'm not interested in hospital rules!" Shane's temper was
rising fast. "Now get out of here; we'll push the call button if we
need you!"

The nurse pulled herself up to her full height and said,
"Well!" then turned and stalked out of the room.

Shane sank back against the pillow as though the brief
spurt of anger had drained him of all strength. Karen could see the
pounding pulse in his temple and knew he must be in agony. She caressed
his face gently with her fingertips and kissed his closed eyelids as
she whispered, "Is there anything I can do to make you more
comfortable?"

He kissed her finger as it slid across his mouth. "You're
already doing it. Who taught you those subtle little ways of pleasing a
man?"

She smiled. "No one. I just do what comes naturally and
you seem to like it."

"
Seem
to like it?" He took her hand
and held it against the pain in his head. "That's a masterpiece of
understatement! You wind me around those tiny fingers of yours and you
know it."

Oh, how she wished that were true! If she could only tell
him how much she loved him. She gently soothed his aching head with her
fingers and could feel him relaxing into sleep when the door opened
again and a man walked in followed by the same nurse who had
interrupted them earlier. Shane opened his eyes and groaned with the
effort of turning his head. The man looked at Shane then at Karen
perched on the bed beside him and said, "I'm Dr. Flemming, Mr.
McKittrick. I treated you when you were brought in, remember?"

Shane murmured, "Vaguely."

The doctor cleared his throat. "It's against the hospital
rules for Mrs. McKittrick to be on the bed with you."

Shane took Karen's hand and squeezed it. "So I understand."

The doctor looked embarrassed. "Well, look, I can
understand your wanting her with you, but you really will rest better
if she'll leave and come back tomorrow."

"The hell I will! If she leaves I'm going with her."

"Oh, now, Mr. McKittrick we can't possibly allow that!" He
sounded thoroughly alarmed. "It may be several days before you're well
enough to be discharged."

Shane looked at Karen. "How did you get here?"

She said, "I drove the Corvette. But, Shane, be
sensible—"

"I am being sensible. I want you to take me home."

The doctor sputtered as Karen replied. "Shane, you'd never
stand the trip. Wait until you're feeling better tomorrow—"

Shane sat up and held his head in both hands as if afraid
it would blow apart. Karen put her arms around him and held him against
her as she continued to soothe him.

"The doctor's right; a concussion is nothing to fool
around with. You're in so much pain you can hardly move. They'll give
you something to make you sleep and I'll be right here. I'll sit in a
chair by the bed and hold your hand. Dr. Flemming will let me stay,
won't you, doctor?"

She glared at the confused man and he spoke quickly. "Of
course."

Shane straightened up and lowered his legs over the side
of the bed and began unfastening the hospital gown he was wearing.

"I'm going home," he said stubbornly. "Karen, go down to
the business office and make arrangements for me to leave and, doctor,
get that woman"—he nodded to the nurse—"out of here
and send someone in to help me dress."

The trip home was a nightmare. Karen's nerves were
stretched taut as she guided the powerful car through the misty,
shifting fog along the coast. Shane was slumped in the other seat, his
face gray with pain and nausea, and he was shivering with cold. She
should never have allowed him to talk her into this folly! She should
have insisted he stay in the hospital, but she'd never been able to
deny him anything, except on their wedding night. She shuddered at the
memory of that awful night, thinking that her fears then were nothing
compared to the fear she was feeling now. She should have refused to
bring him home, made him stay in the hospital, but she'd wanted him
with her so badly. He'd said he needed her and she wanted to take care
of him.

Karen turned into the driveway and stopped the car as
close as she could to the front door. Mrs. Whitney appeared almost
immediately and opened Shane's door. She had lost her usual calm and
looked worried and upset. She told him how relieved she was that he
wasn't seriously injured as she helped him out of the car. Mrs. Whitney
was a tall woman, and strong, and she was able to support his height
and weight where Karen could not. Together they got him upstairs and
sat him on the edge of the bed; Karen removed his shirt and shoes and
helped him into his long velour robe. Mrs. Whitney turned up the heat
on Shane's side of the electric blanket and left.

Karen unbuckled his belt and said, "Can you stand so I can
pull off your slacks?"

He managed a weak grin. "I'll stand anytime you want to
take off my pants, sweetheart."

She blushed and helped him to his feet.

She left on his briefs and again wrapped the heavy robe
around him, then helped him into bed and pulled up the blankets. He was
still shivering, but not quite so violently, and she turned off the
bedside light as she said, "Close your eyes and relax. I'll be back in
a minute."

Actually it was five minutes before she came back, dressed
in a mint green cloud of chiffon that was one of her trousseau
nighties, and crawled into bed beside him. Shane turned
toward
her and she reached for him and cradled his head against the softness
of her breasts. He drew her close and buried his face against her as he
murmured. "Oh Karen, sweet Karen, you're so soft."

She lightly massaged the tight muscles at the nape of his
neck. "How does this feel, Shane? Does it help?"

He groaned. "Do you need to ask? I wonder, though, if
later you'll ever be able to forgive me."

"Forgive you for what?"

He kissed her partially exposed breast. "For making such a
failure of my noble plans for sending you away."

She smiled in the dark. "Go to sleep, darling. We don't
have to worry about that now."

Karen woke to the sound of water splashing in the
bathroom. It was still dark but a suggestion of light was beginning to
show at the closed drapes. A shaft of brilliance made a path through
the darkness before the bathroom light was flicked off and she heard
Shane making his way across the room. He climbed into bed beside her
and she murmured sleepily, "Shane, are you all right?"

"I'm fine. I didn't mean to wake you." He took her in his
arms and pressed her against him. She stiffled a gasp as she realized
that he was completely naked. His body was long and lean and muscular.
She tried to combat her tenseness as she said, "Does your head still
hurt?"

His lips caressed her face. "Yes, but it's more bearable
now."

He nuzzled the hollow of her neck below her ear and sent
tingles in all directions. She relaxed in his arms.

He raised his head and his lips teased hers, then moved
down her slender throat as he pushed aside her deeply cut nightgown.
She gasped with pleasure and wound her fingers in his dark hair.

Her nightie was tossed to the floor and his exploring
hands sent tongues of fire through her. She arched her body against his
and her voice quivered as she said, "Tell me what you want me to do,
Shane."

"You're doing just fine. We'll take it slowly; I don't
want to frighten you again."

He did take it slowly until finally it was Karen who
begged for release, and when it came she lost all hold on reality and
soared. When she finally touched earth again she lay snuggled in
Shane's arms, satiated and content. She tugged at his ear lobe with her
teeth and whispered, "Oh, Shane. I love you so."

His smile slowly died and a fleeting look of pain swept
across his face as he said, "No, Karen, it's not love you feel for me.
I've just introduced you into the mystery and joy of passion, and it's
easy to confuse that with love. Don't make that mistake, Karen. I don't
want to hurt you."

She shuddered as his remark hit home and vowed to be more
careful in the future. Shane didn't want love from her and she'd have
to keep her feelings for him under stricter control. She mustn't let
him know how deeply she cared.

He must have realized how his words had hurt because he
lifted her face and kissed her. "For a beginner, Mrs. McKittrick, you
were slightly
spectacular.
It's a good thing I've got this pounding headache. I'd never have been
able to be as gentle with you if I'd felt even halfway decent."

Oh, no, she'd forgotten about his concussion! She gasped
and put her hand to the hammering pulse at his temple as she said, "I'm
sorry, Shane, I forgot. We should have waited."

He groaned as he gathered her to him. "No way! I'd waited
as long as I could. There's a limit to any man's endurance and mine had
been reached, believe me! The pain of wanting you was a great deal
worse than the pain in my head."

The next three weeks were pure heaven, or would have been
if Karen had been able to forget that hers wasn't a normal marriage,
that her husband was humoring her only until he got the one thing he
wanted—a son. They took trips to Lake Tahoe, to Disneyland,
where Karen was wide-eyed with delight, and to San Francisco for the
opera—but always their nights were spent making love and
Karen was a little embarrassed to admit that she liked that best of
all. Shane tried to be gentle but more often than not their hunger for
each other could not be controlled and their loving was violent and
immensely satisfying.

Then came the day when Karen knew she was not yet
pregnant. She shuddered at the thought of telling Shane. He asked only
one thing of her, a child, and in spite of all their loving she had
failed him. Would he be angry and blame her? She didn't think she could
stand it if he withdrew again and treated her like a little girl who
could never do anything right.