Taming the Bear Collection (12 page)

      
"How do you know?"

      
"I just know."

      
"Because of the speech I gave you last night? Listen, Beorn, maybe you should stop this truck and turn around if that's the impression you have of me. That wasn't me talking last night."

      
"Yes, it was."

      
"No, it wasn't. It was my wolf. I don't know how my wolf side did it, but it took over and said that. That's not me."

      
"Yes, it is."

      
"Why are you so sure?" Rain was starting to get frustrated at his condescending tone.

      
"Because your wolf is an animal. It can't speak and it can't speak through you. Deep down inside, that's what you feel. You're becoming one with what you are, not running from it like the other wolves in Bucklin."

      
"My
human
friend had to clean my house because it was so dirty the other day. She had to clean up all the pizza boxes that I had stacked beside the couch. All I do is watch TV and eat pizza. Does that sound like a wolf to you?"

      
"Are you happy doing that every night?"

      
"Yes."

      
"No, you're not."

      
This guy was good. She almost felt naked in front of him, and transparent.

      
"Okay, fine. I have felt like something's missing lately, but I'm getting that tonight."

      
"A man isn't what's missing from your life. A connection with what you really are is what's missing."

      
"Why are you so sure?"

      
"I've known most of these wolves my whole life, Rain. I can see how they've changed over the years. They're becoming more and more miserable. Thorn is my best friend in the world."

      
"That guy has it all figured out."

      
"No, he doesn't. He's denied his inner beast for too long. I can tell, he's not happy."

      
"But Rowan seems happy."

      
"Rowan
is
happy. Both halves of him are connected."

      
"Eva says they're not. She thinks the reason he flips out and kills is because his wolf has been suppressed for too long and then it takes over."

      
"She's a human. She doesn't know what she's talking about. Rowan is a wolf. He defends his mate just like a wolf would. There's nothing weird or different about him, he's just got it figured out."

      
"So what about you?"

      
"Me?"

      
"Are you in touch with your bear?"

      
"I am a bear. We are two halves of one whole."

      
"I didn't know this date would be a bunch of riddles."

      
"Last night I saw a wolf who was desperately looking for someone to help her change. Someone to help her fix what's broken in her life. Rain, I'm going to help you with that."

      
"Nothing is broken in my life."

      
"Just trust me on this, girly. After tonight you'll never look at your life the same again."

      
"What are you going to do to me?"

      
"Nothing extreme. I'll just show you the way."

      
"I'm kind of scared."

      
"Of what? Embracing who and what you are?"

      
Rain thought about it for a second. Beorn was right: there had been something missing in her life. Every night that she sat on her ass eating processed junk and watching human TV shows left her more and more depressed. She couldn't find a meaningful relationship to save her life and she was definitely turned off by every wolf she met in Bucklin. Then, the one shifter who came to her with confidence in what he was had turned her on to no end. There was something about Beorn that drew her in, and now she was beginning to figure out what it was.

      
"Okay," she said, slamming her hands down on the dashboard. "By god, I'll do it! I'm ready for whatever you're going to throw at me!"

      
Beorn laughed, his deep rumble filling up the entire cab of the vehicle. "That's wonderful. I think you're going to have a great time tonight."

      
I better get laid for all of my trouble,
she thought.
And it better be damn good.

      
"If you hate wolves and their pack ideas so much, then why do you want them to embrace their animal side?"

      
"As a bear, I'm a solitary creature. So I think the whole alpha, beta and gamma stuff is pretty silly. What really hacks me off about it, though, is that none of that means shit anymore. You live in a town with a goddamn mayor and city council who try to pretend like they're following some ancient life. They have no idea what they're doing and they have no idea how to be a wolf."

      
"But you said it was dangerous to have thoughts like that. Wasn't our town betrayed by someone who had thoughts like that?"

      
"I think Forrest has it figured out," Beorn said, cutting his eyes at Rain. His voice had taken on a more serious and somber tone. "But the way he's going about it is wrong. Why does he want to kill all the wolves who don't agree with him? That's essentially what he's trying to do. If he wants to take his pack and move back into the wilderness, then that's his prerogative, but he shouldn't be forcing it on the rest."

      
"But you seem to want it forced on everyone."

      
"I don't. Your lifestyle annoys the shit out of me, but I'm not going to force every wolf in town to change. I can be annoyed with someone's lifestyle and still accept them. I don't like dirty hippies, either, but that doesn't mean I go around with a big stick bashing up their drum circles. I don't show up at Burning Man killing people left and right."

      
"That's a pretty good point."

      
"Nothing in life is black and white, Rain. I know your mind has been poisoned by all the TV you watch, but not everybody is a good guy or a bad guy."

      
"I know that!"

      
"Okay. I'm just reiterating."

      
"So what are you going to do with me tonight?"

      
Beorn looked at her and smiled a devilish smile. She could feel her stomach do backflips when his eyes landed on her. Everything about this man was pure sex.

      
"We're going to go hunting."

      
Rain looked away and smiled. She had never hunted anything in her life, but she had to admit that the thrill of shifting and attacking Eden this morning had been like nothing she had ever experienced before. What would it be like to sink her teeth into a deer or other animal? Would it be quite as thrilling? She would find out tonight.

      
Beorn glanced over at Rain one more time. She was trying to hide her face but she was smiling—he could see her reflection in the window. There was something stirring inside of him beyond the lust he had felt earlier as he watched the happiness on her face. He quickly shoved that notion out of his brain and tried to refocus on the task at hand. It wouldn't do him any good to catch feelings right now, especially with the danger he was going to face tomorrow night.

      
The situation with Thorn and Abaddon had completely left his memory, but now it was creeping back in. Thorn was a crazy fool and he was going to get them both killed. But tonight was all about pleasure and helping a lost wolf find her way. The peril Thorn had brought to him would be there tomorrow.

      
Everything he had said to Rain was completely true. To an outsider he might appear to be someone who couldn't make up his mind, but he had a very well-developed sense of honor. Forrest was right; the wolves didn't need to be living the life they did. It was going to create disaster one day, and they couldn't keep denying that. But at the same time it was wrong to try and force them to follow him or perish. This was a realization that everyone was going to have to arrive at on their own.

      
The stunning beauty sitting next to Beorn was close to realizing it; she just needed a little nudging from someone who cared. As much as people thought him to be an asshole, he truly did care. The bear had a heart; he just didn’t choose to reveal it to everyone.

      
"So how much longer until we get to your place?" Rain asked, finally looking up from her gleeful exile.

      
"We're going to pull off the road soon, but after that it'll be a bit of a walk."

      
"You live in the woods?"

      
"I live pretty deep in the woods, actually."

      
"Do you live in a cave? I mean, I'm ready to connect with my wild side, but I don't think I can deal with a cave."

      
Beorn couldn't help but laugh. Would living in a cave be so bad? He had considered it a few times when he thought he was becoming too human, but that wouldn't be too much fun for him. He was in touch with his wild side, but he did still spend most of his time as a human.

      
"No, I don't live in a cave. I have a cabin that I built myself."

      
"A man who knows how to work with his hands. I like that."

      
"I know how to do a lot with my hands."

      
Beorn felt a rush of excitement as his female companion giggled and winked at his innuendo. It was almost like they were two horny teenagers heading to Make-Out Point. They knew why they were going, but were both too shy to come out and say anything about it. Hopefully there wouldn't be any awkwardness when the time came. Beorn hated that.

      
"You're bad. I like that. So how are you going to get your truck full of supplies up to your cabin? I take it you don't drive up to it."

      
"It'd be impossible to get this big thing up to the cabin. You'll laugh if I tell you what I do."

      
"No, I won't."

      
"It would look crazy to any humans or hunters who walked up on me."

      
"Have they ever done that?"

      
"Thankfully, no."

      
"So what do you do?"

      
"Okay, here goes. I carry what I can in a few bags up to the cabin. Then I usually get a pull-behind cart and pull it down to the truck. I shift of course to pull it. Then I fill it up, shift and bring it back."

      
"You're shitting me."

      
"I shit you not, my good lady."

      
"Didn't you say you park in a parking lot? How would a naked giant digging through his truck look to other people?"

      
"It's an abandoned parking lot. Nobody would ever catch me. I did catch some teenagers trying to have a party one time when I pulled up. One of the braver boys tried to tell me to get lost."

      
"I'm sure that didn't end well for them."

      
"All I had to do was give them crazy eyes and scream at the top of my lungs. They all scattered and never came back."

      
"I'm sure you're intimidating when you're angry, but I think you're really just a big softie."

      
Beorn was anything but a softie. He had a heart, but it only extended so far. He gave Rain a
whatever
look and turned back to the road, pulled off to the side and stopped the truck.

      
"Why are we stopping?" she asked.

      
"I have to open the gate."

      
Beorn got out and opened the old rusty gate that blocked entrance to the abandoned road that led to his parking lot. Rain was giving him a half-crazy look as he got back into the truck and pulled through before hopping out and shutting the gate again. She was still looking at him funny when he sat down.

      
"What?"

      
"You're like Batman going to the Batcave," she said, giggling. "That's too funny."

      
"Batman? I guess I never got into that. I'm aware of the movies, but I've never seen them."

      
"I have all the movie channels on my TV," she said, looking down with shame. "I'm terrible, Beorn."

      
"Why do you say that?" he asked, turning towards her and putting the truck back into park. She seemed to really be struggling with what she wanted to say and Beorn wanted her to have his full attention.

      
"I'm even terrible for a human. I'm just a lazy, shiftless person who sits around all day stuffing her face with junk food and watching TV. If I was human I'd weigh five hundred pounds. I'm shocked I haven't defeated my wolf metabolism and started gaining weight as it is. I'm just a drain on society and everyone around me. I'm a child who had no parents and never grew up."

      
"Didn't Rowan help raise you?"

      
"Rowan and Aster. Well, more Rowan than anything. Even so, he's got a mate now and doesn't have time for me like he used to. Don’t get me wrong, I love Eva and she's done a lot to help me out in the past few days. But she's not a wolf. She doesn’t know what it's like. I love her, but she doesn't truly understand me."

      
"I understand you," Beorn said. He reached over and pinched her chin between his thumb and forefinger, lifting her eyes to meet his. "You're not terrible. You've just been misguided."