Authors: Elizabeth Lee
“C
OME IN.”
Gia invited me in through the gate. It took me a second to recover from the initial shock of what my brain had started to piece together. “Nick, this is Audrey. Audrey, this is mommy's friend Nick.”
“Breakfast at Tiffany's,
huh?” I mumbled to Gia, still in shock and amazed that I was able to recall what she'd told me was her favorite movie.
She nodded.
“Hi, Nick,” Audrey greeted me with a smile. I crouched down to get a really good look at her. To make sure her eyes weren't green or brown. I wished in that moment they were any color but blue. I could see a few other similarities, but the eyes were what told me things I wished I didn't know. I wished that I hadn't just figured out exactly why Gia reacted the way she did when Landry Westwood's name was mentioned. Wished that I didn't know the exact reason Gia had given up her career. So many things were making sense now. And I hated most of them.
“Hello, Audrey.” I reached out and shook her hand. “I thought your mom was pretty, but wow. I bet you break all the boys’ hearts. It's very nice to meet you.” I winked and she blushed. The same way her mom did when I said something nice. She put her tiny hand in mine and grinned, not saying a word.
“You want a drink?” Gia asked.
“Yeah.” I stood and nodded. “Maybe a couple,” I said under my breath as I followed her.
“Me too,” she agreed. “Come on, Audrey. Let’s take Nick inside.” Audrey skipped ahead of us and opened the back door.
Gia led me inside, went straight to the refrigerator, and pulled two beers out. “Go play, honey. Mommy needs to talk to Nick.” Audrey offered up a pout and readied her excuse to stay with the grownups, but Gia pointed to the living room. “Go. We'll order pizza in a little bit.”
“Okay!” The little girl smiled in agreement and skipped out of the room.
Gia turned back to me, holding a beer out. “Well now you know.”
“Know what?” I shrugged, taking the beer and quickly twisting the top off.
“Come on, Nick. I saw the way you were looking at her,” she said, pulling out one of the kitchen table chairs and sitting down. I played dumb, shaking my head as I sat down across from her. “It's not that hard to figure out. She looks just like him.”
“Not exactly,” I finally said. “She looks a lot like her mom too. I was kidding about pretty. I should’ve been honest and said beautiful.”
Good Lord. It was like Tucker had taken over my mouth.
“Thanks.” Gia smiled. “But I know you've already figured out in her head who her daddy is.”
“Doesn't matter,” I told her. “It's your business. Not mine. I'm starting to understand you a little better though.”
“In a good way or bad way?”
“Is there a bad way?” I grinned.
It didn't change the way I saw her. If anything, it endeared her more to me. I started to wonder about all that she had gone through from having child so young. How selfless it had been of her to give up her dream to bring that little girl into this world. I hated that it made me like her more. The old Nick would have seen a girl with a kid and run the other way, but things felt different. Or at least they were starting to.
So what if she had a kid with Landry? It wasn’t like she was my girlfriend.
“So why didn't Landry say anything about you two having a kid together? Or Sadie?” I let my curiosity get the best of me once again. I really needed to learn how to keep my mouth shut.
“Landry didn’t say anything because he doesn't know.”
“He doesn't know?” I was stunned. Secrets like this didn't often stay buried in Hollywood. “Why?”
“There's a perfectly good reason that he doesn't know,” she confessed. “He didn't want her. I did. End of story,” she said defensively. But it wasn't the end of the story. “He wanted me to ‘get rid’ of her. His exact words. I know you think he's great, so I don't expect you to understand where I'm coming from, but he—”
“I understand where you're coming from,” I assured her. It was a tough bite to chew. I'd spent some time with Landry, and while he might have been a big-shot music star, the last thing I’d ever thought he was was a dick. I was probably not the best judge of character when it came to being selfish, but if I had been in Landry's shoes, I liked to think I would’ve left the decision about whether or not to have the baby to Gia. Then I would have manned up and done what was right. Sixteen or not. It's not like Westwoods were hurting for money and didn't have the means to support a child. The idea of him turning her away when she needed him made me want to knock his fucking head off.
“I'm over it, Nick,” Gia said calmly, reading into the tense look on my face. “I don't need you to run over there and kick his ass or anything.” She chuckled.
“You sure? Doesn't sound like a bad idea.” I shrugged.
“It was a long time ago and I don't regret the decision I made.” She paused. “But thank you. For the gesture.”
I smiled, not needing to tell her that the offer stood. Any time, any place.
“And you have to promise me that you won't say a word. If not for me, for Audrey. She doesn't need to be dragged into the middle of my mess.” I could see her eyes well up a little as she fought back the tears. “I've done just about everything I can do to protect her.”
“I would never say a word,” I promised. I felt my chest tighten at the thought of ever betraying her. She had so much on her plate already, and I didn't want to be the kind of guy who would hurt her. “Does Sadie know?”
“Yes. But she would never tell anyone, and I doubt she wants to talk about me with you.” She took a drink. “I didn't take a personal leave.”
“I figured. Because of me, right?”
“Not entirely. For starters, I didn't really want to see Landry in the studio today. I've managed to steer clear of him for this long. Didn't need him poking around about what I've been up to.”
I nodded. “I guess I understand that.”
“And Sadie gave me the week off because she was worried we had something going on,” she confessed. “After she saw the pictures from our lunch the other day, her head almost exploded.”
“That's ridiculous. We just ate lunch.”
“Sadie and I have a complicated history. I should have known better than to cross that line.”
“Line? We didn't do anything.”
“We didn't, but you and I both know it's a bad idea for us to spend time together.” Her eyes were full of worry. Or regret. Or maybe she was just scared that she'd all but admitted that she liked spending time with me. I knew that she’d felt something that night at the bar and on our ‘not a date.’
“Are you saying that you think there is something between us?” I couldn't help the smirk that curled the corners of my mouth.
“I'm not going to admit that, Nick,” she stated with her trademark eye roll. “Especially not to you. And it doesn't matter anyway. You're with Sadie, and I am not going to be the one who comes between you.”
“Forget Sadie for just one second,” I suggested. “Do you like me?”
“It doesn't matter,” she argued again. “Nothing can ever happen between us.” Her voice was weak as she delivered her words, almost as if she didn't believe them.
“Well I like you. More than I probably should, but I'm not ashamed to admit it.”
“I'm not ashamed of admitting it,” she protested. “I'm ashamed of being
that
person.
Again
.”
“You're going to have to explain that one,” I informed her.
“Sadie has trust issues,” she said. “It's my fault.”
“It's not your fault. I asked you to lunch. If anything, this is my fault.” I felt horrible for her blaming this on herself. I was supposed to be Sadie's boyfriend. “I should have known better. Lunch. Dancing with you that night at the bar. It's my fault, Gia. Please don't blame yourself.”
“Not about me and you Nick. I totally blame you for that,” she joked. “Why couldn't you just keep being an asshole?”
“Sorry,” I said, but it came out more like a question. “I think.”
“Don't be.” She placed her hand on mine. “When you're not being an asshole, I kind of like you.” She looked at me, and for the first time since we'd met, I didn't feel like she was judging me. I felt like she finally understood me. “Which is why you shouldn't be here. I can't—won't—do this to Sadie. I already made that mistake with Landry.” I waited for her to continue. “When we were kids, Sadie was head over heels for him and he was head over heels for me. I knew the way she felt about him, but I was so full of myself, with my recording contract and guaranteed stardom, that I acted like a complete bitch instead of the best friend I should have been.”
“You're seriously going to blame yourself for all of Sadie's issues? I don't see her treating you like a best friend. Not when she's bossing you around all day and making insane demands. She's awful to you. Regardless of what happened back then, you don't deserve to be treated that way. Besides that, you were kids then. Kids make mistakes.”
“We were, but we were treated like adults. Expected to behave like them,” she reasoned.
“So then what happened?”
“Landry and I were sneaking under the radar and I got pregnant. Sadie was there for me when no one else was. My parents pretty much gave up on me. Said I ruined my career.”
“And then Landry walked away?”
“He didn't want the baby. But I couldn't. You know?”
“I do.” I shook my head. I understood. More than she knew. My mother could have chosen not to have me. Had an abortion and continued on with life. Sure, she’d decided to have me as a means to blackmail my father, but still. I was grateful that I was alive. Gia was different than my mother though. She truly had made her whole life about her child. “It's insane to me that in this day and age you were able to hide it from him.”
“I left. Packed up all my belongings. Declined the record contract and moved back to Texas with my sister. It was hard though. After I had Audrey, I couldn't find work. Not many people looking to hire a has-been child star and I wasn't that great at waitressing or retail, which were the two jobs I could find. Then Sadie offered me a job. A job that paid way more than I was making. So me, Audrey, my sister, and my cousin moved here.”
“Why not get back into music?”
“Things have changed,” she continued. “I'm not the same person I was back then and I have Audrey. I need something stable and I don't want to be gone all the time. She's only in first grade.”
I couldn't take her sitting there on the verge of tears as she filled me in on her life up until now. I stood and moved around to where she was sitting.
When I scooped her up into a hug, I thought she might lose it. The tears were already on the brink, but dammit if she didn't need some form of comfort. I could tell that she'd been keeping all of this in for way too long. As she let her body press against mine, I was reminded of how well we’d fit together when we were dancing, only this time, in the stillness of our embrace, I really felt it.
She was the perfect height for me to rest my chin on her head as I held her. My arms were the perfect length to wrap around her waist and hold her close. And for a few seconds I completely forgot about everything else. That is, until the reality of how much I didn't want to let go set in. My throat and chest began to constrict as I realized what it all meant.
Holy shit. I am falling face-first in love with this woman. This woman who has a kid with the guy holding the door open to my dream. And she also works for my current foot in that very same door.
Well wasn’t that a semi-truck-sized wrench in my plans.
“How about we order that pizza?” I asked, knowing that she had talked about the past enough for one night and that I needed to diffuse the situation before I told her how I felt and made things even more complicated.
She already knew I liked her. I couldn't imagine what would happen if I told her that what I was feeling might be more. Besides that, I could see a nosy pair of blue eyes peeking around the doorframe.
“What do you think Audrey? Pepperoni?”
“Yep!” Audrey excitedly jumped into the kitchen. The smile her mom had on her face when I released my arms from around her made the fact that I was going to be late to Sadie's totally worth it.
“Perfect.”
I
WASN'T
that late. I had told Sadie that I'd be at her house around nine and it was nine thirty. Thirty minutes well spent if you ask me. I had been lucky enough to get an encore performance from one very talented little girl after I’d wooed her with pizza.
Needless to say, I was feeling pretty good about the night at Gia's. That is, until I’d had to leave.
“Thanks for a great night.” I'd reached out, grabbing Gia's hand as she walked me to the front door. “Audrey is amazing. Kinda like her mom,” I complimented her, wanting to see her cheeks blush red. I was totally starting to get why my brother was big on dropping corny lines on Lila. Gia looked pretty damn cute when she was being modest.
I leaned in and wrapped my arms around her, hugging her tight.
“Thanks for the pizza. And for keeping my secret,” she added. “I know you're friends with Landry, so this is going to be hard. But I really appreciate it.” Her soft brown hair brushed against my arms as she rested her head against my chest.