Taking Chances (9 page)

“Jen you don’t have to go but I would love to be able to show you Europe. We can start with London. Bryan and veronica have offered to open their home to us, and of course we can stay at the hotel if you prefer.” Kissing her temple he waited before
continuing to see if she had any questions.

“I want to try Tyler I do but I have never been on a plane. I do have a passport but I never thought in a million years I would use it for anything other than another form of identification.” He could tell by the tremble in her voice she was scared but the lack of tremble in her body showed him she wasn’t completely against the idea.

“We will take the private jet. And if you fee
l ok after London we can go anywhere you want.
Ireland, Scotland, France or even Italy and Greece.” He was getting excited at the possibility of literally showing her the world.

The two of them talked the whole way home about the impending trip. Jenna was petrified and made a mental note to make damn sure her
anti-anxiety prescription was full and on hand for the whole trip.
She normally didn’t like to take them seeing as how they were a narcotic and left her feeling like she was in a haze. Her medications were as necessary to her as diabetics were to them. She would always need them and has for as long as she can remember. However for the first time in who knows how long the unknown wasn’t completely paralyzing scary. She knew the flight would be hard and
the crowds abroad would be harder. She knew Tyler would be there every step of the way holding her hand, and if she said she had enough he wouldn’t try to talk her out of it he would accept it and take her to a safe place.

~~~~~~

Jenna spent the better part of the next week packing and unpacking. She went online and read everything she could about London. She bought no less
than
ten tour books full of things to see and do when they were there. She even packed almost all of
Oscar’s things even though he was only going next door to Sara’s house.

Finally about 5
days before they were set to depart Jenna broke down. Tyler found her curled up in his bed with the blinds drawn and the covers over her head. The minute he walked into his apartment he knew something was wrong.
Immediately dropping his briefcase he broke into a run heading to his bedroom to find her. From the doorway he could see her shaking violently. He pulled the covers off her head and found her curled up in the fetal position. There were tears streaming down her face and she was practically hyperventilating.

“JENNA baby what is it. What can I do?” He picked her up and sat her in his lap; she immediately curled up into him and held grabbed a fistful of his shirt.

“Oh Tyler!
What was I thinking? I can’t do this. W-w-what will people think of me there. I won’t fit in with your colleagues or your brothers friends. That’s if we even get there. I mean do you know how far London is? Oh god we are going to fly in a little private jet all the way there?” She stopped her tirade long enough to gulp for breathe.

Holding her close Tyler just let her vent. He knew that if he tried to reason with her right now it would only make things worse. In her mind set right now she sees only the worst in every situation. She sees only demise and bad things.

It took about a half an hour of Tyler just holding her, rocking her and rubbing her back before she finally just gave out. She fell asleep in his arms. Placing her gently in the bed he covered her and went to change out of his suit. After seeing that everything was shut off and taken care of he grabbed a quick sandwich and then joined her in bed. He didn’t want to take a chance that if he pulled her to him she would wake so he just fell asleep next to her and be there if she needed him in the night.

Jenna woke up the next morning and sat up looking around.
Even though she knew that she slept for a long time she was not rested. Getting up she put her robe on and left the bedroom in search of Tyler.
Just before she
entered the kitchen she heard him.

“…never want to go through that again. It was horrible she was so sad so scared so broken in my arms. All I could do was hold her. Yeah you’re right
it’s
like she is a different person when it happens. I don’t
know what’s
going to happen. I have to be in London in two days. Yeah I will keep you posted.
Alright, bye Dean.”
She heard him put his cellphone down on the counter and waited a second before walking into the kitchen.

“Princess, are you ok?
Did you get rest? I didn’t mean to wake you.”
Tyler watched her walk into the kitchen wrapped in her bathrobe, she sat at the table and smiled weakly at him.

“It’s
ok Tyler honest. I slept but it was
n’t
restful. I am so sorry you had to see me like that. I
cannot even remember
the last time I had a panic attack that bad. I don’t even remember you getting home.
” She sounded so heartbroken it rubbed him raw.
“

“I’m ok now I promise. I want to go to London I want to prove to myself and to you I am a strong.
I mean that is if you still want me to go with you.
” Her voice was choked up but he didn’t interrupt her. He could see what she had to say was important to her.

“Tyler I want to be with you so much it hurts. But this is who I am and who I always will be. I am never going to be strong and brave like you. I am always going to be scared and anxious. I really do understand if you
can’t
be with me. All I ask is that if you have decided to move on, that you do so now. If we drag this out and there isn’t a future for us I thi
nk it would…Oh god Tyler what are you doing.” He was standing and had swept her up in his embrace in the blink of an eye.

“You
are strong Jenna. Anyone who has gone through what you have in life and still not only living but sharing themselves with people is amazing. You help people. I know that you give a portion of your art sales to help others with anxiety. I know that you want to do things and I will never ever hold it against you if you
can’t
. I love you Jenna and I want to be with you, now and
forever.” He kissed her.

“I was going to wait until we were in London and I was showing you some romantic English countryside but I can’t
. Marry me Jenna. Be my wife and let me help you accomplish the things you want to in your life. Marry me and make me complete. You are my greatest adventure. Waking up
every day
with you and sharing my life with you is better than any other adventure I have ever had.” He stepped back and looked at her shocked face waiting for an answer. Praying she would say yes.

Jenna opened and closed her mouth several times before the words she was searching for finally came out. The only words she could find were plain and simple. “You are my dream come true Tyler
. Of course I will marry you.”

Jenna threw herself into his arms and kissed him with all the love she had. Crying and laughing at the same time she asked him. “Can
we get married in England?
In some fabulous little English garden?
Just you and me with your family.
Oh and of course Dean and Sara.”

“Do you honestly think I would say no to marry
you so soon. Yo
u do realize of course its winter,
right?”
Laughing and holding her as close as he could get her.
He couldn’t remember the last time he was this happy.

“So?
Won’t that be even more perfect?
Beautiful trees covered in snow. I love the snow I feel like a kid when it snows.
” Jenna sat at the table smiling from ear to ear. Tyler sat across her.

“You can have anything you want Jenna. I would give you the moon if I could.” The couple sat talking for over an hour. Eating breakfast and making phone calls to let their family and friends know what had happened.

When they went back into the bedroom Tyler made Jenna sit on the chair in front of the window. He went to his dresser and pulled out a small blue box. He walked over and knelt in front of her.

“I am going to do this right.” Opening the box Jenna gasped when she saw a large diamond ring. It was a round diamond set in platinum and around the diamond
(which had to be easily 3 karats)
were small emeralds.

“This ring made me think of you. The diamond is so pure and you can see everything. The way you hide nothing from me and the emeralds match your one incredibly vibrantly green eye.” He took the ring from the box and held it to the tip of her ring finger.

“Jennifer Heather Flynn will you be my wife.”
She heard the hitch in his voice and nodded.

“Tyler Raymond Johnson I can think of nothing in the world that would mean more to me than being your wife.” She looked down and watched him place the ring on her finger.

The couple spent the rest of the day together. Making love, talking, Jenna even sketched what she pictured for their wedding. The two of them were so happy they practically floated on air.

Chapter thirteen

The trip to London wasn’t as bad as Jenna expected.
Tyler had held her hand and explained everything she could expect to happen
every step of the way.
The flight was smooth and comfortable. Jenna was amazed by the comfort of the
jet it was so beautiful and she felt very special in the oversized seats with a staff there just for them. The fact that Dean and Sara along with
Tyler’s parents also flew with them helped keep Jenna comf
ortable. So far the hardest part of the trip had been
saying goodbye to Oscar who was staying with Adam the now co-owner of the café and his family.

Almost the whole way there Julia and Sara kept Jenna occupied with discussions of the wedding. If the older woman was upset that she wasn’t getting the big fancy wedding she had always pictured for her son, like she did with Bryan, she didn’t let on. By the time they landed in London Jenna had let known all the things she wanted for her wedding. Sara is going to stand up with Jenna and Bryan is going to stand up with Tyler. Dean had been over the moon when Jenna asked him to walk her down the aisle.

Once they landed in London they were greeted by Bryan and Veronica. After the
hellos were said and the luggage was collected, everyone got into waiting chauffer driven cars and headed to the families hotel.
They all agreed to meet in the dining room for dinner in an hour.
Bryan and Veronica lived fifteen minutes from the hotel while everyone else stayed at the hotel in the three top floor penthouse suites.

“I can’t believe that I am not only in London but I am here with my fiancé!” Jenna exclaimed as she threw open the curtains in the living area of the suite to look out on the city.

Tyler walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist.
The couple just stood there looking out the window. After a few moments Jenna turned in
Tyler’s
arms and wrapped her arms around his neck. She pulled him down and kissed him tenderly.

“My
mother didn’t push you into anything you don’t want did she?” Tyler asked her a little bit worried.

“No
she was fine. I only hope you like everything we
plan. We are going the day after tomorrow to see the estate we will be married at. It belongs to friends of the family, or so your mother told me. She told me there is a small bridge over a brook surrounded by tons of trees. She also said if we prefer something different there is a small gazebo in a clearing close to the house.” Looking up at him adoringly she hoped he would like the ideas.

“Yes the estate is owned by Nicholas and Diana my mother’s family and Diana’s have been friends for years. Both places
sound wonderful princess. As long as the end result is you and I spending our lives together, we can get married in an alley for all I care.” Kissing her nose he winked and walked over to
see who was knocking on the door.

Jenna walked through to the
suite to explore. She grabbed a bottle of sparkling water from behind the bar and continued her exploration sipping the drink. She found her way to the
bedroom kicking off her shoes. Looking around she found her suitcase and opened
unpacking and putting her clothes away. She also put most of
Tyler’s
clothes away, and hung up both of their garment bags. The last thing she did was to find
her retro make up and toiletries
case along with the dress she wanted to wear to dinner and her stockings.
Before she headed into bathroom the she peaked out into the living room and saw
Tyler talking to someone whom she guessed was the hotel manager, come to make his presence known.

She walked into the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror then
pulled her hair down from its travel messed ponytail. Opening her
toiletries
case she set everything out the way she liked it, for some reason that made her comfortable. Once she was done she slipped out of her jeans and sweater. Standing there in just her pink lacy panties and matching bra she heard a whistle.