Authors: Loni Flowers
CHAPTER FIVE
Clair
His work boots thumped across the floor as he walked towards the kitchen. Clair wondered why everyone here was being so kind. She had run into people on the street that were willing to help her, but only if they got something in return. There were some things she wouldn’t do, which often prevented her from getting food or a ride to another town. It was nice to see that there were still people in the world who wanted to help and expected nothing in return.
Now, Clair had to ask herself: should she stay or should she go? What were the chances this town held any promise for her after none of the others did? If she stayed, what would she be staying for? Alex? She laughed at herself for even considering
such an option. Staying in town for a guy was the last thing she needed and why would she? She didn’t even know him. One night of good deeds didn’t automatically make a nice, respectful guy. Didn’t all men have ulterior motives?
She could always leave, but where would she go? To the next town, which only seemed to be the same as the one before? When would she stop running? She didn’t know what the point of it was anymore. Would it be so bad to just take a chance and settle down somewhere?
“May I sit?”
Lost in thought, Clair didn’t notice Roz had come up to her table and set a fresh drink in front of her.
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Oh, it feels good to sit. I wasn’t even supposed to work this morning. What kind of work do you do, Clair?”
She paused for a moment, trying to decide what she wanted to tell her. But she had no reason to lie. “I don’t have a job at the moment,” she said, moving her straw to the new glass.
“Really?”
Roz sat up straighter, her eyes gleaming with excitement. “Well, are you looking for one? My last girl quit on me last week and I’ve been looking for someone ever since. I need someone like yesterday. I own this place, so I shouldn’t have to work these shifts. I’ve already put in my time. Anyway, are you interested?”
“Umm…well…That would be great but…”
Roz clapped her hands together, beaming. “Oh great, this is great. When do you think you can you start?”
“I can’t. Sorry, I just can’t,” Clair said.
“Well, why not? I thought you didn’t have anywhere to go?” Roz gasped, slapping her hand over her mouth.
Clair glared at her. “What did you just say?” She looked back toward the kitchen, knowing there was only one person who would have shared this information with her. “Well, in case you didn’t know, you have to have a place to live before you can have a job. And since you already know how pathetic my life is, you know I don’t have that. I’m not looking for any handouts here. I never said I needed help from anybody.”
“No, you’re wrong; I don’t know anything about you. But it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see that you don’t have much. Alex may not have had any right telling me your business, but all he’s trying to do is help. I can tell he…. well, he just wants to help. I did the same for him when he came in town over a year ago. He didn’t want my help either, but I can be pretty convincing. I can help you, if you’ll let me. I have an apartment above my garage and you’re welcome to live there while you’re working here. I’ll pay you, of course. We can work out the details later. You’d really be doing me a favor, so we’d actually be helping each other out. I need all the help I can get. What do you say?”
Clair crossed her arms and slumped back against the seat. She looked out the window before turning to meet her eyes. “But you don’t even know me. Why would you even trust me?”
Roz smiled, “Well, you haven’t given me a reason not to trust you… yet.”
“I… I don’t know, Clair said hesitantly.
“Don’t be stubborn. You need help and there’s no sense in pretending you’re doing okay out there on the street. Look at your face. No girl should be out there by herself. God knows what would have happened to you if Alex hadn’t come along. You look exhausted, and you need a place to rest and get back on your feet. Let me help you.”
The more Roz talked, the further she leaned across the table. Clair couldn’t look at her. Instead, she stared at a pigeon pecking the ground outside her window. She knew once their eyes met, a flood of tears would come pouring out. She couldn’t understand why Roz cared so much. Why was she being so nice when she didn’t even know her? Her own mother didn’t show her that much compassion. But everything she said was true. She wasn’t doing okay. She was tired.
Tired of everything.
“All right, Roz, you’re all set. I’ve got everything moved around like you wanted,” Alex said, coming up to the table.
“Thanks, hon, I appreciate you coming in before work.”
“So did you get everything squared away?” he asked.
Clair quickly looked at Roz, knowing exactly what Alex was asking. Roz gave her a faint smile and nodded. Her eyes welled up with tears and she bit her lip, trying to hold them back. Alex had seen her cry enough last night and she didn’t want to let him see it again. But she had to say something to him. All she wanted to do when she left his apartment was eat breakfast and leave. She didn’t ask him for a handout or to share her private business with whomever.
“Roz, can you give me a minute with Alex before he leaves?”
She nodded and gave up her seat. “I’ll be back in a few to continue our conversation.”
Clair waited for Roz to walk far enough away so as not to hear her conversation before she spoke.
"Why Alex? Why did you tell her?" She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him.
"Tell who what? What are you talking about?"
"What made you think it was okay to tell Roz my personal business?" She leaned over the table toward him, making sure Alex heard every word.
"I didn't mean for it to happen, it just came out that…”
“Just because you most likely saved my life last night doesn't mean I need to be saved from everything else that is screwed up." The volume of her voice rose the more she talked and she noticed other people turning in their seats to look.
"I wasn't trying to pity you, I was only trying to help," he yelled defensively.
"Well, nothing good ever comes from a guy trying to help me out. There's always something more they want out of the deal,” she said, lips trembling. “You won't be getting anything out of me, so you can just move on to someone else." She looked away as fat tears spilled down her cheeks. She swiftly wiped them away with the back of her hands. The diner was quiet and Clair turned around to see everyone watching their scene play out. Looking back at Alex, he only stared at her, the corners of his lips turned down. She couldn’t bear his sad expression or the beady eyes from the guests at the diner, as they bored into her from every direction. Clair bolted out of her seat, and ran into the bathroom, shielding herself from the onlookers.
Leaning over the sink in the bathroom, Clair looked in the mirror. Her lip was puffy and swollen and there was a bruise around the edge of her left eye. She turned the faucet on and ran her hands through the cool water. Splashing water on her face, she mixed it with the tears that still streamed down her cheeks. She looked in the mirror again, asking herself the one question that would forever alter her life. “What should I do? Do I stay or go?” Behind her in the mirror, she saw Roz, who placed a hand on Clair’s shoulder and looked at her reflection.
“Well that’s an easy decision, hon. You stay of course,” she smiled.
“I don’t know,” she said, shaking her head.
“Well, I hope you’re not basing your decision on Alex. He really felt bad about what happened to you last night. When he was telling me about you, he didn’t know you were still in town. It upset him that you left and were still out there, possibly needing his help. He might not have known you long, but it’s evident that he cares. I can see it in his eyes. Alex has been through a lot and… well, that’s all I’ll say about it. If he wants you to know the details, he’ll fill you in at some point, if you stay.”
Clair was touched that Alex seemed to care about what happened to her. Should she really pass up on a chance of starting over when it was being offered to her on a silver platter?
“Yes. I will accept your offer,” she announced as she wrapped her arms around this former stranger, this woman who was willing to give her a chance. Maybe she wouldn’t have to run anymore.
The sound of the alarm clock buzzing woke Clair from a peaceful sleep. Working every day at the diner since Roz hired her four days ago had really exhausted her. Sleep came much easier than it used to. She was still having nightmares about the attack, however, and being in a strange place made it hard to get much rest. Roz asked Clair to come in at ten this morning, which was later than her normal seven a.m. shift, which she’d gotten used to. Climbing out of bed, she stumbled to the small bathroom for a quick shower.
The warmth of shower seemed to revive her mood and she wrapped a towel around herself before walking over to her closet. Deciding what to wear on a daily basis wasn’t something Clair was used to. Roz insisted on taking her shopping despite her protests. She had already done enough by giving her a job and a place to live; she didn’t want her spending any extra money on her too. Clair could easily tell that shopping was just the type of girly activity that Roz was into. After making her try on outfit after outfit, Clair decided shopping wasn’t her favorite pastime.
Picking out a shirt and a pair of blue jeans, she got dressed and quickly fixed her hair. The apartment was already furnished as if someone had been living there all along. She had even gone grocery shopping and filled up the kitchen cabinets and the refrigerator. Pinching herself occasionally seemed to be her new habit, if only to make sure everything that was happening to her was real.
She grabbed a cereal bar off the counter and headed out the door for work. Today she walked, since Roz was out running errands, but most days, Roz would drop her off. She only lived three blocks from the diner. It was early summer and the morning sky was baby blue, without a cloud in sight--perfect for walking.
As soon as Clair entered the diner, she could tell it was going to be a long day. Already, there was a line at the counter for take-out orders and the majority of the tables were full. Clair donned the dreaded hairnet before entering the kitchen and grabbed an apron off the hook. When she approached the sink, the glasses and plates were piled high, leftover food glued to their surfaces. At least Clair knew what she’d be doing for the next few hours.
The diner had been unusually busy, at least more than she was used to, and her shift flew by without her realizing the time. She was ready for bed and couldn’t wait to get off her feet. She had skipped lunch and was starving, so she fixed herself a grilled cheese sandwich with a side of fries, and made herself comfortable in the back corner booth by the window. Across the street, she watched a family hurrying to their car. The man held an umbrella for the woman, while the little girl played in the puddles, laughing and having fun, with no concern that she was getting soaked from the light summer rain. Clair smiled as she watched her and remembered doing the same with her parents when she was younger. Her father made up a game they used to play--Puddle Jumping. Whoever made the biggest splash won, and when her mother wasn’t yelling at them for getting soaked or running in their socks, she would judge the contest. On rare occasions, she’d even join in on the fun.
Clair nibbled on her sandwich as she thought about her father and where he might be now. What was he doing? Did he have a new family? She would never understand why he had to
leave and run away from them. Did he think that she and her mother didn’t love him enough? Would she ever get the chance to ask him these questions? She didn’t think so. Propping her feet on the seat across from her, she rested her head against the window. She was lost in her memories of her parents, while watching the raindrops glide down the window, each one sliding into another, forming a web across the windowpane.
“Clair.”
She looked at Roz, who was wearing a deep red, spaghetti-strap dress. It hung loosely down to her calves, with a split up the side, and a bodice that was cut a little low in the front. She also wore shiny red heels that matched. Wrapped around her shoulders was a black shawl that covered her arms and Clair thought she looked beautiful.
“Oh hey, Roz, don’t you look nice? Where are you going all dressed up?”
“Well, I’m taking Stu out for his birthday tonight and who knows what we’ll do afterwards, so don’t wait up for me. Actually, don’t be surprised if I don’t come home at all,” she said with a wink.
“That’s really sweet of you. I think you’ll be enough of a present for him,” Clair said, with a sly smile. “What is today’s date anyway? So much has happened this week; I’m surprised I remembered you gave me the weekend off.”
“It’s the 3rd, June 3rd?
“Oh yeah that’s right. Now I remember exactly why I made myself forget.” Clair said, looking out the window once again. “Today is my dad’s birthday, too. I try not to think about what the days of the month are when I know it’s getting close to my mom’s or dad’s birthday. I’d prefer to forget about it all together.”