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Authors: Nona Raines

BOOK: Take This Man
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“We’ll
sneak her in under my jacket or something. Let’s go.”

After
stuffing a wriggling Jezebel into her carrier, Elyse turned to the man she’d
slept with, yet hardly knew. She still hated him, even though he was being
kind. She still hated herself. And Adam—
No. Don’t think about him
. She
would erase him from her memory, never think about him again.

“I
won’t bother you after tomorrow,” she told him, her voice low. Then she
realized it was already tomorrow.

“Maybe
by then you’ll come to your senses.” Jason led the way out, carrying her
suitcase, while Elyse followed with the cat.

If
by that he meant she might change her mind, he was dead wrong.

Elyse
left the apartment, knowing she would never come back again. As she locked the
door, she was sealing up her past and putting it behind her. She knew how to do
that. She’d had lots of practice.

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter
Two

 

“I’m
going to Summit for a week or so.” Jason looked at Elyse as she carried two
cups of tea into the living room of her tiny apartment.

Though
it was two years since she’d left, Elyse never heard the name of her home town
without inwardly flinching. Home town? What was she thinking? It had never been
home. She’d never had one, not really.

She
hoped her friend hadn’t caught her instinctive response. She tried to cover it
with an expression of mild surprise, while setting the cups down on the coffee
table. “Really? What’s the occasion?”

Jason
visited his family once or twice a year—his “duty” visit, he called it—and they
rarely spoke otherwise. He was a disappointment to his family, in more ways
than one.

“Some
birthday or big anniversary? You usually skip those affairs, don’t you?”

Jason
preferred to avoid the drama of those family occasions and chose instead to
send a tasteful and very expensive gift.

“Nothing
like that.” His lips turned down in distaste as he looked down at his cup. “What
is this?”

Elyse
went back to the kitchen for the cookies. “Lemon verbena. It’s good.”

“One
of those herbal concoctions? Why can’t you ever serve real tea? Or real coffee,
for God’s sake?”

“You’re
over-caffeinated as it is. Don’t be a baby, go on, try it.” In spite of what
once happened between them, Jason was now Elyse’s closest friend. There was
nothing sexual in their relationship, nor had there been since that one night,
two years ago.

He
brought her to Albany with him when he realized she had no intention of staying
in Summit, and no money to go anywhere else. He also revealed his true sexual
orientation.

Jason
looked out for her, helped her find a place to stay, and a job, when she knew
no one else in the city. He did all that for her even when she still hated him.
She’d hated everyone at the time, most of all herself.

She’d
asked him why, once. Why he’d helped her when he didn’t even know her? Had it
been out of guilt?

“It
gave me something to do,” he told her. “Somebody to worry about and take care
of. Something to think about besides my own sorry life.”

She
never would have made it without Jason. Hell, he was her rock.

“Well,
don’t keep me hanging,” she told him, setting the dish of chocolate-covered
marshmallow cookies on the coffee table. “Something important must be happening
for you to go back there. What is it?”

“Coop’s
getting a divorce.” Jason’s announcement was flat and matter-of-fact.

Elyse
blinked. He’d tossed her a boulder, and she was flattened. She sank onto the
futon. “Cooper Caddiman?”

“The
one and only,” Jason sighed from his chair.

She
felt dazed. “What…how…how’d you hear this?”

Jason
hesitated, then looked at her. “He told me.”

“You’ve
been talking to him?”

He
nodded, his gaze flickering away. Elyse’s shock was replaced by a surge of
anger. “Have you lost your mind?”

He
winced, holding up his palms defensively. “Leelee—”

“Don’t
try to get around me with that stupid nickname. I asked you if you’ve lost your
damn mind!
Cooper Caddiman?
He broke your heart!”

“I
know, but—”

“But
what? He told you he loved you, then turned around and got married. To a woman.”

Jason’s
face settled into a mask of sadness. “I know.”

Elyse
backed off. She didn’t want to add to Jason’s pain, but she had to keep him
from getting hurt again.

“He
was afraid to come out. It’s not easy, you know, and especially not to people
like his. They’re very conservative—”

“Oh,
boohoo.” She ground her teeth. Cooper Caddiman was a sleaze. Not only did he
betray Jason, he also married some poor unsuspecting woman who had no idea he who
he really was. “That doesn’t mean he’s entitled to screw up two people’s lives,
three if you count his.” She was on a roll again. “Which I don’t, because he’s
an asshole—”

“It’s
not working,” Jason interrupted. “The marriage.”

“Oh,
gee, well, I wonder why.” Elyse grabbed one of the chocolate-covered cookies
and took an angry bite.

“They’re
splitting up. And I’m going to go see him.”

She
shook her head no because her mouth was full.

Jason’s
carefully tended eyebrows lifted. “No?”

“No,”
she told him firmly once she swallowed. “I’ll tie you down if have to.”

“Mmm.
Kinky. I might like it.” When Jason smiled, the dimples on either side of his
mouth deepened. It was enough to send even a marble statue’s heart a-flutter.
He was that handsome. His good looks actually went far beyond handsome, into
the realm of beautiful. If he’d been born a few decades earlier, he’d have made
a matinee idol to give Tyrone Power a run for his money. With those startling
blue eyes and killer dimples, he was a ringer for a perfect model in some
glossy magazine ad for designer jeans or hair gel. Elyse pictured him slouched
against a wall pouting and looking bored.
I’m so above all you people
looking at this.

Even
Elyse, who was well aware of his sexual preference, was not completely immune
to her friend’s charms. But she was not about to be distracted by them now.

Time
to get the discussion back on track. “How long have you been talking to him?”

Jason
sighed and took a sip of his tea. “Couple months.”

“And
who contacted who first?”

“He
did. He sent me an e-mail.”

She
crammed the rest of her cookie into her mouth, chewed ferociously, and wished
instead she was taking a bite out of Cooper Caddiman. Damn him anyway. Jason
had moved on, but even two years later that son of a bitch Coop refused to let
him go. It would have been easy enough for him to find Jason’s e-mail address,
maybe even locating him through the law firm Jason worked for.

“You
could have ignored him,” she pointed out.

He
bowed his head in agreement. “True. But you never completely get over your
first love. You should know that.”

Elyse
stiffened. She wasn’t going to go there. This was about Jason.

“So
he’s getting a divorce, and he wants you back. Is that it?”

“He’s
getting a divorce and…we’re going to discuss the future.”

“No.
No, no, no. He’s going to suck you in and break your heart again. You have to
stay away from him,” Elyse pleaded.

They
were both startled by the sudden appearance of Elyse’s cat, Jezebel. The
tortoiseshell had slipped into the living room and leapt to the arm of Jason’s
chair, rubbing against his sleeve and purring to beat the band.

“Jez,
get down,” she said.

“No,
she’s fine.” He stroked the cat as she settled onto his lap. That was another
of Jason’s charms—he didn’t object to cat fur on his expensive suit.

“I’m
not stupid, Leelee.” He ignored her snort. “I’m not going into this blindly. I’m
not making any assumptions. Things may not work out. But even if they don’t, I
have to go back and face the past. I’ve tried running from it for two years.
Anyway,” he shifted, crossing his legs, “I didn’t come here to ask for your
approval. I know I won’t get it.”

Elyse
crossed her arms over her chest. “Damn right, you won’t.”

He
smiled. “It would be easier to take you seriously if you didn’t have chocolate
smeared all over your mouth.”

“Shit.”
She swiped her fingers across her lips and saw the evidence on them. She rose
and grabbed a paper towel from the roll in the kitchen, and scrubbed her mouth
furiously.

She
dropped back onto the futon, glaring at him.

Jason
pointed to a spot of chocolate she missed. “I don’t know how you can eat those
things. They’re disgusting.”

She
crossed her arms over her chest again and gave him a mean look. “Shut up. I’m
mad at you.”

“Because
I insulted your cookies?”

“No,
because you’re being stupid, and you’re gonna get hurt again.”

He
set his cup on the coffee table. “Well, since you object so strenuously, maybe
you’ll come with me.”

The
breath
whooshed
out of Elyse’s lungs. He’d landed another boulder. “What?”

“Come
with me. You can be my faithful watchdog, make sure I don’t do anything stupid.”

She
huffed. “You
need
a watchdog. Preferably a big one, who’d tear a chunk
out of Coop’s ass.”

Jason
winked at her, his dimples flashing. “You’re no mastiff, but you’ll do. Come
with me.”

He
was serious. Elyse’s heart thumped hard against her breastbone. She shook her
head. “No. If you’re going to screw up your life, I’m not going to be a
witness.”

“Bullshit.”
His voice snapped the air like glass cracking.

She
gaped at him.

“It’s
not about me,” he told her. “You’re scared. You have as much baggage from the
past as I have, back there in dear old Summit.”

Sweat
broke out along her hairline. She never allowed herself to think about that
part of her past. She’d kept herself too busy the past two years to dwell on
it. But Jason was right. Part of her had never let go of that pain. Though she
often told herself it was over and forgotten, Elyse knew it wasn’t true.

But
the lie was easier, and safer. “I’m over him.”

“Again,
bullshit.” Jason’s blue eyes were like lasers as he leaned forward, unsettling
the cat. “You are
so
not over Adam Vostek.” He flicked his hand to
indicate her tiny apartment. “You’ve entombed yourself in this charming place—”


Entombed
?
That’s crazy.”

“Look
around. A lousy little furnished place with crappy furniture and no personal
touches, nothing. Not even pictures on the wall. Nothing to show that Elyse
Zemanski lives here. It’s as Spartan as a nun’s cell.”

“I
don’t like clutter. I’m not attached to stuff.” Growing up, she had taught
herself not to get too attached to anything, since she never knew where she’d
be from one day to the next. That was life with Sunny, her mom.

With
her grandmother, her life had been more stable. But the woman had shown nothing
but a cold sense of duty toward her out-of-wedlock granddaughter. Elyse was
living proof of her mother’s sinful lifestyle. Everything given by Grandma
Wanda was given grudgingly, and accepted just as grudgingly by Elyse. Again,
not a conducive atmosphere for forming attachments.

“That’s
right,” Jason was saying. “The only thing you’re attached to is the cat.”

Jez
jumped onto Elyse’s lap, as if to prove the point. She stroked Jezebel’s soft
fur, wincing a bit as the cat lightly pricked her thighs with outstretched
claws.

“You
have no life outside this self-imposed prison cell,” he told her.

“I
have a life. I work—”

“You
work at a job you hate, with people you don’t like.”

True
enough. Her job sucked. Working as a cashier at the SaveMart wouldn’t be so bad
if she wasn’t stuck with an overbearing asshole of a manager. Chester was the
kind of guy who made himself important by nitpicking and belittling the other
employees, even in front of the customers. The workers wavered between
resentment and fear, afraid that speaking up might cost them their jobs. It
made for a pretty miserable workplace.

Elyse
had been squirreling money away, promising herself she’d leave. But something
kept her from taking the next step.

Still,
she wasn’t stagnating completely. “I’m taking courses.”

Though
that wasn’t much comfort. She could afford no more than one or two classes per
semester, so she’d be about forty by the time she earned her business degree.

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