Take a Risk (Risk #1) (14 page)

Talking to the police was becoming a habit for her, but not one that she relished. Colt hadn’t let her finish her shift once they’d gone. He’d had her home not long after the police left the club, and then he took her upstairs, into her own bed, forbidding her to go through her ritual of checking out the house. His kisses were an easy, and a welcome, distraction. With him in the house, she didn’t feel so vulnerable and so a full run through wasn’t required.

Today, as she had worked, the occasional footfalls that echoed through the ceiling reminded her that he was still here, watching over her as she worked. Now that the end of her work day was approaching, she speculated as to what they would do that evening and whether they would spend the night together inside or go out, though she couldn’t decide which she would enjoy more.

‘You should see this as a triumph,’ she said to her final patient of the day. ‘It’s natural to be nervous before a date, Bobby.’

‘It’s a Monday. Who has sex on a Monday?’ he grumped. Lyssa tried not to think about what she and Colt had done that morning… and on her lunch break.

‘Is that what you want from your date tonight?’

‘I’m a guy, right?’

‘Yes, you are.’ His insecurity about that fact flared up in anger on occasion. ‘But developing this relationship is important to you too.’

‘I feel like I have to do it. I have to get this done. Maybe then this stress will leave me, you know?’

‘Don’t be impulsive,’ Lyssa said, this was the same advice she gave to several patients. ‘Do you care about Deshana?’ The woman he was going on a date with.

‘Yes, I think so… maybe.’

‘Breathe out,’ she said, sensing his rising panic. ‘Tell me what you’re thinking. You can say anything here. This isn’t a place of judgement.’

‘All I can think about is her breasts,’ he admitted, shaking his legs in a sign of nerves. He kept his lowered attention on the carpet and the tent that grew in his slacks made him mutter and grab one of her cushions onto his lap. ‘I’m sorry, this is mortifying.’

‘You have nothing to be embarrassed about. I’m a doctor. It’s good that you have a positive reaction to your memory of Deshana. She must be very beautiful.’

‘She is.’

‘Bear in mind that Deshana will be nervous too. I’m sure she wants things to work out between you both. It’s possible that she’s not ready to be physically intimate with you.’

His leg stopped shaking and his eyes shot to hers. ‘You think she’s not attracted to me?’

‘She wouldn’t have agreed to go out with you at all, let along agree to go out with you again, if she wasn’t attracted to you.’

He began to shake his head. ‘I can’t do this. I’m not ready for this. I don’t know what I’m doing.’

‘You do,’ she soothed. ‘We’ve spent many sessions talking about what you should expect from physical intimacy and how to react to the sensations you’ll experience. You just have to remember the techniques we discussed. This date, your relationship with Deshana is the last hurdle, Bobby. Look how far you’ve come. You should be so proud.’

‘Ok,’ he nodded. ‘Ok, yes, ok.’

‘It’s natural to be anxious, but once you’ve done this, once this is over with, you’ll wonder what all the fuss was about. Being with someone, relationships, are positive things that can be very fulfilling.’

‘If I don’t do it now then I never will,’ he said.

She checked the time. ‘Next week, you can tell me how it goes. Baby steps still show progress, it’s all forward motion. Remember that and don’t put too much pressure on yourself. This is a marathon.’

‘Not a sprint,’ he agreed, somewhat bolstered.

They scheduled the next appointment and she maintained her smile until she heard the front door close. After that, she slid her pen and pad onto her desk and reminded herself that all she had to do was bring Bobby’s notes up to date, then she was free to spend the rest of the night with Colt.

‘Did you ever think about converting the attic?’

There he was, sauntering through her office door, tall, broad, and sexy, and already raising her temperature with his proximity.

‘I did actually,’ she said. ‘But I thought I would wait until I decided it was time to have children.’

‘Whoa, forward,’ he said, holding up his hands then dropping to the middle of her patient couch. ‘You’re on the pill, right?’

‘You never asked and that’s quite an assumption, Mr. Warner.’ She picked up her notebook again. ‘Do you think that you made the subconscious decision that you were ready for children?’

‘I’m thirty-five, I’ve thought about kids. But my lifestyle isn’t conducive to it.’

‘Nothing to do with the lack of a stable female in your life and your fear of making mistakes in terms of choosing a mother for your offspring?’

‘Honestly? I think that as a guy you assume that you have all the time in the world.’

Switching into doctor mode was natural for her and he didn’t moan or point it out, he just went with it and answered her questions.

‘What are you hiding?’ she asked.

‘Hiding?’

‘You never shy from a question. I have patients who won’t be so honest with me even after I’ve been treating them for a year.’

‘I had a lot of secrets from Carrie,’ he said. ‘I figure that part of the reason it didn’t work out is that she didn’t know what was going on in my head, and my life… I don’t want to make that mistake again… Plus, I have doctor patient confidentiality, right?’

Slipping her pad and pen onto the side table she pulled the clip and bobby pins out of her hair to shake it out, letting it fall around her chest. Popping open two shirt buttons, she rose, and gathered her skirt up her thighs in her fists, revealing the stockings she had donned that morning.

‘Nice,’ he drawled.

Sliding one knee the length of his thigh, she straddled him, closing her other leg on the side of his other outer thigh.

‘I’m feeling frisky.’

‘Isn’t this against the rules, doc?’ he said, flicking her hair out of the way with his forehead, he sucked her neck.

‘You need a more hands on approach, Mr. Warner. You know how I value my patient’s satisfaction.’

‘Satisfaction is still a ways off.’

The swelling in his groin, protruding between them, begged to differ. She wriggled forward against it. ‘We have lift off,’ she whispered and took both of his hands around to splay them on her ass. ‘Is it my butt? Or my boobs?’ Arching up, she squashed them against him.

‘Maybe I’ll consider that while you’re laying those sugar lips on me.’

‘Take your time,’ she said, meeting his mouth on its descent to hers.

Something about his chest drew her hands, she yanked up his tee-shirt, and spread her fingers on his pecs, purring out as she widened her legs to grind down on him.

‘Nice,’ he growled on her lips and ripped open her shirt.

Her gasp made her curve back and she was shocked to see a gaping Bobby standing just behind the couch.

‘Bobby,’ she stuttered, snatching the sides of her shirt to hold it closed. Colt was frowning, obviously not appreciating that she’d said another man’s name.

‘Doctor Cutler, I… I didn’t realise your services extended this far.’

Colt twisted and hooked an arm over the couch to sneer at Bobby. ‘Boyfriend, not patient, get lost.’

‘Don’t talk to him like that,’ she muttered and clambered off Colt, holding her shirt with one hand and yanking at her skirt to take it back down to its intended length. ‘Why did you come back, Bobby? Is there a problem?’

‘I forgot my scarf,’ he said, pointing in the direction of the hat stand but fixating on her chest, which was more visible than he was used to it being, and the tent formed in his pants again.

‘Get the fuck out of here!’ Colt was off the couch, stalking toward Bobby, he must have noticed the tent.

‘Colt!’ she said, scurrying after him but Bobby spun and ran out, slamming the front door on his frantic exit.

‘Little prick!’ Colt said, whipping around, except his glare didn’t match her fury.

‘What did you do?’ she hollered. ‘Why did you scare him like that? He’s my patient.’

‘The jerk had a boner! He was checking out your tits. I’d have knocked his teeth out if—‘

‘Bobby is not a threat to me. Do you think I’ve never seen an erection before? Dicks are my bread and butter, you idiot! I’ve seen more than you, I guarantee it. I spent years specialising in sexual issues. There were days I had twenty different dicks in my hands.’

‘Those guys didn’t see you half-naked, making out with a guy.’

‘That doesn’t matter, this is a non-judgemental space and now you’ve scared him. He might not come back.’

‘So what? He’s a little pervert—‘

‘No!’ she said, eliminating the space between them. ‘We do not use that word in here. We heal here. I have to be accepting.’

‘Of that? You accept men getting stiff in your company? Does that happen with him when you’re alone? Or with others?’

‘Just because a man gets an erection doesn’t mean that he’ll use it and not all erections are sexual in nature. Men can’t necessarily control a physiological reaction.’

‘Are you kidding me? You think that doctor shit will work with me?’

Now toe-to-toe, Lyssa’s rage built when she realised just how angry he was. All of her training with regards to anger management abandoned her. All she wanted to do was shout and beat him about the head.

‘Please leave,’ she said.

Faltering, his brow hardened. ‘You’re kicking me out? We have one fight and you break up with me? Where are all those conflict resolution skills you must have studied?’

‘This is them in action – get out!’

‘Nice, Miss. Lys,’ he snapped and stormed out of the office door. ‘Very nice!’

The front door slammed and unlike when Bobby slammed it, this time she jumped. A well of moisture rushed to her tear ducts, but she wouldn’t let it out. She distracted herself by buttoning her shirt as best she could to make herself semi-decent. Stalking to the desk, her impulse was to pick up the phone to Suzette, except she wasn’t sure of the status of their relationship.

Colt had paid for Suzette’s cab home after the police had excused them last night and she didn’t know what had happened with Pete when Suzette got home. If he suspected that his fiancée had lied, Lyssa’s name had come up, or the truth had come out then the last thing Pete wanted to hear was Lyssa’s voice on the phone asking for Suzette’s assistance or advice.

Deciding that she was too riled up to update Bobby’s notes, or to sit still upstairs, she grabbed her purse, shoved the strap up her arm and slammed out of the house – everyone else had done it, now it was her turn.

When her and Archie had argued it had never been like that. Her blood felt scalding in her veins and the anger in her now came from a primal core. The blast of wind pushing back on her as she strode down the sidewalk offered a welcome cleansing to the built up adrenaline, but if she waited for it all to clear out she’d be walking for miles.

Right now she had no destination in mind, but she had to straighten out her thoughts. Her friendship with Suzette was on the rocks, and her new lover had declared that she’d ended things with him when all she had wanted was a timeout. Those were the priorities in her thoughts, although she had to worry about Bobby too, her admirer, and her research at Risqué. The last thing she wanted was more drama, so she’d march on, putting herself on a timeout, and hope it would all come right in the end.

By the time she got home it was late and dark. Despite being tired she went through her ritual of checking every room before she checked her phone for messages, but there weren’t any. Stripping down, she climbed into bed and when she inhaled the scent of Colt, here where she’d left him sleeping just that morning, the tears tried to creep out again.

Tomorrow new patients were due into her practice and so she had to face the reality that life went on, despite her own personal drama. She had no excuse to see or speak to Colt until Thursday night when she was next due at Risqué.

But she wasn’t a woman to play games in matters of the heart. She felt better after deciding that if she hadn’t heard from Colt by the end of her day of patients, then she would call him and they would talk things out. This resolve helped her to fall asleep with a greater sense of optimism.

The optimism didn’t last very long because just before her penultimate patient arrived, two unknown men walked into her office. Her panic was short-lived, they identified themselves as detectives and then they said the word “homicide”.

‘Why are homicide detectives talking to me?’ she asked, descending into her doctor chair while they sat on the patient couch. ‘Is this about the shooting?’

‘You’ve flashed on the police radar quite regularly of late, Doctor Cutler,’ Detective Hoburn said.

‘I suppose so,’ she said. ‘Will you tell me why you’re here?’

‘There was a homicide last night and we have reason to believe you have information about the victim and that you may have been one of the last people to see him alive.’