Take a Bow (The Perfect Plans Series Book 2) (2 page)

“Ummm…not quite. The jury’s still out on that one,” I attempt to act casual, though I’m trembling a little. The remembrance of Julia’s warning that inevitably Liam would be pulled into that media bullshit…I can’t even think about it again. Not right now. “Things are a little up in the air,” I offer at Liam’s questioning gaze. “It’s…difficult,” I add, a cold shiver running down my spine, Alex’s own words blasting through me like an arctic wind,
‘It can be…difficult’
.

“Oh,” he nods, his hands clasped, dangling between his wide spread legs. “Well, don’t give up too easily, Abs. You need to fight for what you want. You taught me that,” he adds, apparently seeing through my act of bravado, if not pretending to. I really can’t be sure if I can fool anyone anymore, Liam included.

Oh, Liam, if you only knew…what I walked away from, and why.
I can’t even believe I’m here, back in Toronto, having this conversation with him. Never in a million years did I expect us to be so cordial to each other after all that’s transpired. Talking of dreams, boyfriends, and freedom. Especially after sitting together in comfortable silence, signing our divorce papers. What a shock to my system.

“I should go,” he stands from the sofa.

I’m unable to form a reply as I watch him pick up a copy of the papers and fold them in his hands. I simply follow suit as he makes his way to the door.

At this moment I realize,
this is it
. All of our wonderful times, meaningful moments together come crashing back to me in a flurry. A whirlwind of emotion rushes over me as I begrudgingly follow him, mentally preparing myself to say goodbye. In this brief instant, our life together flashes before my eyes - Liam and I in Mexico, sunbathing under the warmth of the heated sun; smiling at him on our wedding day as his huge smile beams at me from his place at the altar; our day-to-day normalcy of a seemingly happy existence. I’m struck completely speechless, my eyes filling with unshed tears.

I know deep down that my inner turmoil is heightened all the more by what I’ve left behind in London. Alex. My dream world. Although, in the end, it wasn’t much of a dream world was it? The grass may appear greener, but it’s full of fertilizer. Full of shit that I couldn’t trudge through.

Reaching the door, Liam turns to look down at me, a melancholy expression donning his face. “I love you, Aby. I will always love you,” he says, pulling me into his arms.

“I love you too,” I whisper against his chest, a tear finally slipping down my cheek as I absorb his familiar scent. This is the closure we’ve both needed - the final stamp for us to move forward towards our freedom, our dreams. I can’t help but feel a weight lifting off my shoulders. It’s comforting to know that my walking away didn’t cause irreparable damage to a friendship I hope to maintain for the rest of my life.

Releasing me, he reaches for the door. “Good luck, Abs. I hope every one of your dreams come true,” he offers with a sweet, yet morose, smile.

“You too. Good luck on your road trip. Stay safe,” I add - our long used term whenever we’d leave each other.

“Always,” he smiles sweetly in remembrance of our favorite parting words, opening the door to exit Stacey’s apartment. His one final look speaks a thousand words - our final goodbye.

Grabbing my arm to pull me onto the front stoop, he takes me in a final lingering embrace as though reluctant to leave so quickly. His blue eyes sparkle with kind love above his handsome smile when he finally lets me go.

I smile in return - a smile filled with love, thankfulness, and hope, though my heart aches a little. I watch him step onto the landing before suddenly stopping dead in his tracks.

Shielding my eyes from the bright morning sun, I look past him to see what’s halted his departure, losing my breath at the sight of Alex, looking ashen standing at the bottom of the stairs.

Oh my God. What is he doing here?
I stare shocked, my lips parted in the sudden strangling awe, taking in Alex’s real-life form as he regards Liam and I with curiosity. His clothes are a wrinkled mess, his hair in disarray above his beautifully sculpted face covered in seemingly day’s old stubble, if not older. He looks tired and more than a little annoyed, yet still has the ability to take my breath away.

My heartbeat lodges in my throat. I never would have imagined he would show up here. Certainly not after I so abruptly left London without a word. No note of good-bye, no explanation. Though I have no idea what he’s thinking as he stares up at us, I can only assume he’s imagining the worst, watching me bid farewell to another man.

In the stunned silence, I note Liam’s body tense and stammer slightly - a testimony to his ongoing struggles with jealousy, regardless of whether we’re divorced or not. I’m suddenly in the eye of a hurricane and a flying fucking cow just hit me in the gut. What are the odds of this shit? As my jumbled head ricochets between both men, I’m unable to formulate a coherent thought. How exactly does one handle this? Should I introduce them?
“Man I discarded, allow me to introduce you to other man I discarded…”

“You want me to stay, Abs?” Liam asks, looking back to me briefly before locking his firm gaze back on Alex.

I note Alex’s eyebrow quirk at the question, his head tilting mechanically, betraying his gentlemanly composure.

“No, I’m okay,” I manage, pulling my gaze from Alex. “Thank you for stopping by. Thank you for…everything.” I attempt to smile reassuringly when Liam finally looks back towards me.

He offers a small resigned pull of his lips before he turns from me to amble down the stairs, taking slow measured steps making his way towards Alex, still standing unmoving.

Can you say AWKWARD?

Reaching the bottom, he stops abruptly, turning to face Alex dead on.
Oh shit, what is he going to do?

Their tall, strong frames are locked and cocked in an alpha-aura of male dominance like some He-Man showdown in the ready. “Don’t hurt her,” I hear Liam warn, brushing past Alex to continue on. I exhale a breath of relief as he walks away, not naïve that under normal circumstances, the Liam I know would have said and done more.

Looking back to Alex, I note his clenched jaw, quickly averting my gaze to watch Liam drive away. I purposely delay the inevitable confrontation, my eyes peeled to Liam’s Chevy truck as he maneuvers out of the parking lot, before succumbing to look back down the stairs into the eyes of the man I’ve fallen in love with. I’m torn between wanting to rush into his arms to wrap myself tightly around him, and blinking to make sure he’s really here in front of me. My shattered heart isn’t braced for the impact his unexpected presence is pummeling into my system. I wasn’t prepared to see him yet. My broken body isn’t strong enough. I can’t speak.

I’m not sure what to read in his eyes as he walks slowly up the steps towards me, but he looks pissed - his gaze unwavering, holding me hostage. Reaching the landing, his sparkling blue eyes bore into mine as he brushes past me, walking into the apartment.

I feel like a child about to be spanked. A week ago, such a notion involving Alex might have been excitingly delicious. Right now? Not so much. Taking a deep breath of composure, I follow him inside and close the door, resting my forehead momentarily against the wood before turning to face the obvious wrath he came to bestow. I summon the courage to lift my head and face him with confidence, only to lose my breath once more at the sight of him, his incredible body tightened below the clenched jaw of his gorgeous face.

“I’m sensing a trend here, Aby,” he begins, the venomous rasp of his voice both staggering and foreign, “…it seems that whenever I get off of a plane to come to you, I find you with another man.”

Oh shit. He brought the big guns
.

I bite my tongue despite his sarcastic venom hitting all of my defensive buttons. I deserve his anger, though I’m breaking inside at the sight of it. His presence at this moment is sucking up all the air in the room. I’m struggling to breathe.

“Maybe I should learn to fucking call first,” he adds with additional bite.

Yeah, that would actually be really good
. I would absolutely be much more prepared right now to deal with this adolescent-like scolding. However, I think it best I opt to keep that thought to myself. No need to add fuel to his ever-raging fire.

Taking another deep breath, I aim for deflection - the mind-boggling question behind his shocking arrival - while I attempt to portray a shield of strength to cover my somewhat trembling façade, “Why did you come here, Alex?”

“Brilliant question,” he replies sharply before a flicker of pain flashes through his stonewall exterior. “I’m not exactly sure myself, right now,” he begins a slow pace, running his fingers through his mane of brown curls.

Oh God, don’t do that!
Hell, what difference does it make?
Everything
he does brings me to my knees. “Did you come all this way just to vent? If that’s the case, I’ll take it.”

Stopping dead in his tracks, he turns his malevolent gaze to me in frustration. “Vent? You think I came all this way to vent? Chase you down even though you left me without a fucking word? Which, I might add, was fucking great news to receive from your
neighbor boy
.”

I close my eyes in shame, unable to imagine how awful that must have been. Knowing how Alex feels about my London neighbor, Andrew, I cringe at the thought that he had to find out about me leaving that way.

Andrew had been a breath of fresh air for me, someone I’d grown to consider a friend in the short time since I’d moved into my flat. But Alex’s opinion of him varied, to say the least. How sour it must have tasted for Alex, knowing I’d told Andrew I was leaving, yet kept him in the dark.

Shivering, I recall the many awkward occasions between Alex and Andrew over the last month. Regardless of how innocent my interactions with Andrew may have been, I’m not naïve to the fact that, at that moment, Alex must have felt even more betrayed.

“No,
Aby
, you have Stacey to thank for my being here,” he adds, the way my name spits from his beautiful lips sending shivers down my spine.

Sucking in a breath, I stare perplexed. “What? What are you talking about?”

His quick, lashing snicker burns my flesh, “It seems your friend was under the impression that you’d made a mistake, but clearly she’s confused. You obviously have yet to share that you’re reuniting with Liam.”

“No, Alex,” I shake my head. “You’ve misunderstood. Liam was here to sign the divorce papers. I’m not getting back together with him.” Though I sense a possible flicker of relief in his eyes, his countenance remains unchanged as he harshly takes a seat on the sofa, his angry eyes avoiding my direct gaze. “I’m sorry you thought…I’m sorry, Alex.”

“You’re sorry?” he looks up towards me, his glare blasting my already shattered heart. “What are you sorry for? For leaving me when you promised you wouldn’t? Or for saying nothing before you left?”

His words are like a punch to my gut and I struggle to find a reply. “I’m just sorry…for everything,” I offer, knowing my response is inadequate. I’m not sure what else to say as he continues to stare at me, an angry, yet baffled, expression donning his face. Time stands still, akin to an eerie break in the storm, a fleeting calm in the midst of the hurricane allowing you to run for cover or brace yourself for the impending destruction. I attempt to formulate my thoughts as he pulls his gaze from mine to look down into his lap once more. “Alex, when I left a week ago…”

His head darts up towards me, crazed pain etched in his eyes and tone, “A week ago? It’s been nine fucking days!”

“I…”
Shit.
I don’t even know what to say. When I left, the only thing I knew was that I had to get away…to sort through everything that was happening. I hadn’t stopped to think about how long that would take.

“When I realized you were gone, my world crumbled, Aby.”

I have to turn away from the penetration of his pain-filled eyes, looking down at my fumbling hands, my fingers intertwining. The momentary break of his gaze gives me the strength I need to hold it together, though my defensive tendencies are poisoning my composure. “How do you expect me to believe that, when you just admitted you’re only here because of Stacey?” As the question leaves my lips, I shudder at the selfishness of it at the hands of my own insecurities.

“Believe? Aby, I’ve
never
lied to you.” He stands and walks towards me. “For once, can
you
be honest with me and tell me why you left? I need to know.”

Looking up towards him once more, his piercing baby-blues locked searchingly onto mine tests every ounce of my composure, my guilt. “Alex, I left…the way I left. I tried to tell you, that night…”

“The night I made love to you?” his interruption jars me momentarily, the words stabbing me in the chest. I flinch and he closes his eyes as though sensing his impact on me before he opens them quickly, once again veiled in angry hurt.

“What I was trying to tell you was that I needed time…time to figure everything out.”

His eyebrow quirks in disgust, “No, Aby. You told me you thought you should go. And I recall my pathetic attempts at begging you to explain why.”

“Yes! And you weren’t hearing me when I attempted to tell you!” I blurt in desperation. “Why do you think I gave in? Stayed that night only to leave once you were gone in the morning?” Frozen in his fury, he’s either waiting for me to continue or unable to fathom an answer to my seemingly ridiculous question. “I couldn’t even allow myself to try to leave a note…that…”

“That what? Would have meant being honest if only on paper, at least?”

“You’re putting words in my mouth. I don’t expect you to understand why I left the way I did, but I thought you’d somehow understand what I was trying to deal with…”

“
Deal
with? Is life with me something you have to try to deal with, Aby?”

“No-yes. You’re twisting my words.”

“Am I? It doesn’t even hold a candle to how you reached into my chest and twisted my fucking heart out.”

Silence. Painful, torturing silence. Fleeting glances - pain, regret…hope.