Tainted Love: contemporary womens fiction love story and family saga (Behind Closed Doors Book 1) (19 page)

“That’s it? That was my interview?”

“No, sugar,” Sadie laughed. “The last two days was your interview, ‘coz we wouldn’t keep you around in this town if we’d the slightest inkling on you. Don’t matter if you’re in trouble.”

And you know, Sadie was right, waiting tables isn’t that hard. Okay, I’m lying — it is hard. But once you get your head around it, it’s like everything fits into place. You do everything in order and you work out your own little system. You figure out how your customers tick and then it’s really not that complicated, but it’s exhausting.

We absolutely adore Bob’s momma’s house. It’s so beautiful, D, and so incredibly unique. It’s like nothing else in the entire town. It stands on a slight incline set further back from the street, although the garden has become its own kingdom.

The kids on our block call it the haunted house and I can honestly see why. The sheer curtains at the window have been there forever and they’ve turned yellow with age. Until we moved in, there was a draft from an open window which made the drapes twitch. So they all want to know if we’ve seen the ghost yet.

Cate is not really happy but she hasn’t stopped singing, so I think it’s because I’ve told her she can’t bring friends until the house is fixed up. There’s too much work that needs to be done. The house stood empty for quite some time, and it’s not just layers of dust and cobwebs in every room. Bob’s given me the number for his carpenter, but I’m struggling to get a hold of him.

Zoe is thrilled with the movie set we live in. She’s practicing her different reactions for when she sees a real ghost. And you should have seen her on her first day at school! Oh, D, she was such a delight!

She ran across the playground said, “I’m Zoe Frances. I’m starting school today.” Stuck out her hand and added, “It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Kelly.”

“Oh wow, Zoe Frances, you’re a live one. I can see I’m going to have fun with you.”

“She wants to be an actress.” I laughed, too. “You want her to do anything, anything at all, just tell her she’s practicing for future a part in a movie.”

I stood there and I couldn’t believe my baby was starting elementary school. You know, I thought I’d feel old, like my life was over when this happened. Maybe I’d have a mid-life crisis. I am forty-four, you know, little brother. But I feel fabulous and it’s because they’re both happy, so very happy here in Hawthorne Creek. I’m not even worried about Cal finding us. It’s because we’re part of Hawthorne Creek now. I have the strength of the entire community behind me. I feel completely protected.

In that very moment I heard a soft little voice say, “I don’t want to go, Daddy.”

Oh, didn’t that take me back almost twenty years to Georgia’s first day at school. She didn’t want to go either, and Cal had been there to soothe her. I looked over at the cute little one, with a halo of white blonde ringlets and sad blue eyes shimmering with tears.

Her daddy was kneeling before her, drying her tears with his sleeve, biting his lip, and I could see he wasn’t quite sure what to do or say. It was evident to me he was terrified, that if he did the wrong thing, then she’d break. “Don’t cry, Lisa.”

“But I don’t know anyone.”

“Zoe!” I called. Her ponytail swung and she skipped back toward me with a grin. “Do you see Lisa over there with her daddy? She’s got stage fright.”

“Really, Mommy?” I nodded. “Oh no, that’s not good.”

“Can you help her get over it?”

“’Kay.” She walked over to the little one and smiled. “Hi, I’m Zoe. My mommy says you’re Lisa.” The little girl nodded. “I used to get stage fright too, all the time. But all you have to do is take a deep breath and say I can do this. Ready?” She held her hand out and Lisa took it and together they said, “I can do this.” Then Zoe said, “Are you coming?”

Lisa looked at her dad. “Okay.” She smiled, took a shaky breath and said, “I can do this.”

“See you later, kiddo.” He watched them run towards Mrs. Kelly before he turned to me and smiled. “Your granddaughter’s got some confidence!”

“What?” I gasped, turning away from the classroom. While technically, she could be my grandchild, I was furious. The cheeky son of a— then I recognized the broad shoulders, the strong arms, the big hands. He was just trying to get a rise out of me. “Officer Dixon, I never prejudged your relationship with the child you brought to school this morning.”

“My daughter was a one night stand while I was away... em... let’s say I was working, which is technically true.”

“And you didn’t marry her mom the second you’d found out you’d knocked her up when you live in Hawthorne Creek? Oh, you’re gonna burn in Hell for that.”

“Hey,” he grinned, “I’m almost fifty and still reproducing. God loves my genes.”

I laughed. I laughed hard.

“So Kimmi Frances... you still in limbo?”

“Life tossed me lemons.” I shrugged. “The girls decided they wanted lemonade.”

“You’re living in Harriet Goodwin’s old place.” I frowned. “You’ve left a few messages on my answering machine about some work Bob needs doing. I can come around after school and take a look.”

He brought Lisa to the diner for her dinner. He said it’s not every day a girl starts her first day at school. So I also made a fuss for Cate and Zoe, because it was their first day at new schools too. They had sundaes after dinner, which is a rare treat; because it’s tough telling the voice in my head that I don’t care anymore if
he
doesn’t like it.

We walked to our house after closing and I settled the girls in front of the television you bought us as a housewarming gift. You shouldn’t have, that entertainment system is the most elaborate thing in the entire house. Then John and I went through the six bedrooms, three bathrooms, the living room and the kitchen and he took notes. Then he said I’d be seeing him. A lot.

Chapter Forty-Two

Date: 11/01/2002 01:32:00 AM

Subject: Thank you for Coming

I’m so happy you came to see me. Next time, bring everyone. I know they’re busy with studying, and now that Izzy’s followed Robert into the family law firm, she’s very busy too. But I’d really love to see them. I miss you all so much. I was so surprised when you said you were coming to visit, but I guess this was something you needed to tell me in person.

I’m shocked Dad never trusted Cal but they left you everything? Why didn’t Robert tell me? I guess you’re right, I wouldn’t have listened. Oh, thinking about it, Robert did try. I told him I’d choose Cal.

A lot of things make sense now. Why Cal insisted we move into our parents’ house when I couldn’t bear to be there, and the power struggle with Robert. The biggest flag to me now has to be how he changed his mind about you, like I’d flipped a switch when I told him I was pregnant with Caleb. I guess Robert told him if you went, so did the rest.

I’m grateful to Mom and Dad. I own nothing and I have nothing to give Cal. So when you fire his sorry ass from the McKenzie Empire, he can’t come running to me. You must have done it by now? Tell me, how did he take it? I wish I was there to see his face when you delivered the eviction notice on
your
house. Did you tell him you’re selling it? Surely that didn’t go down very well. Ah, never mind, my imagination is serving me well. Thank you so, so much!

He’s going to make me pay, you know. With all this free time he has on his hands, he’s going to come looking for me. I won’t live perpetually waiting, not between the lightning strike and the thunder roll. I’ve decided it’s time to move on with my life. Tell me, Darryl, what do you really think of John?

I know I said we were just good friends, but I’m sure you already know. Just thinking of him makes me smile so much I have to bite my lip. Honestly, I feel like a teenager. Did I really feel like this once before? He makes my heart race when he smiles and if I catch him looking at me, I blush. I’m forty-four years old and I think I have a schoolgirl crush.

He’s been to the diner every day and he’s started caring for the girls after school. He really is wonderful with them. It’s amazing to watch them with him. I’m taken back twenty-five years to days Cal played with you in the garden, before Mom and Dad, before we got married, before he even proposed. Before any of this ever happened. This, what I see in Harriet Goodwin’s garden… is it castles in the clouds?

Now everything is going to change, D, and I’m not sure if I’m ready for this. Maybe I should have had a couple of quick flings, maybe that’s all this will be. I just don’t know how much I should trust him... that’s really not a good thing, is it?

After you left on Halloween, he was amazing. You know I’d offered to have Lisa for the day and it was her birthday. Because she’s crazy about bunny rabbits, John went to get one for her as a present. I took her trick-or-treating with Cate and Zoe.

Lisa was a little white bunny rabbit with a fluffy tail and pink fluffy ears. Zoe’s costume was a wicked red devil, complete with flashing red horns, pointed tail, and three pronged fork. Cate went as a purple fairy princess, with a glittering crown and a star wand. Even this year, my girls wouldn’t let me forego my traditional cat attire.

Are you having flashbacks of the Lycra cat suit with the homemade ears, whiskers, and the feather boa tail, D? So you should,
you
made it! I didn’t tell you I’ve bought one this year and gawd, it’s awful! I felt so self-conscious. Where do I start? It’s strapless, it laces up, it gives certain areas more and others less and it’s not suitable for public consumption! But it’s the only one I could find.

The three girls thought it would be fun to trick-or-treat at John’s. I did try telling them he wasn’t home. His truck wasn’t in the drive and he was supposed to call my cell when he was ready for Lisa to come home for her big surprise. So it was a surprise for us all when the door opened.

“Oh my! What a fright.” His eyes met mine and I nervously mouthed an apology, because Cal would have hated us turning up uninvited and unplanned. But John grinned. “Now what do we have here?” They giggled and I melted just a little. He had them eating from the palm of his hand. “Right, well, for the little devil, I have this,” and he held out his right hand.

“A hand shake?” Zoe was puzzled before she took his hand, and then she yelped. Mystified, she turned over his palm. “Wicked!” She grinned at the trick hand shocker.

You know how mischievous she is. She’s going to have hours of fun finding new ways to torture us with that.

As though he knew what I was thinking, his eyes found mine with a wicked gleam. I swear I had butterflies. “Now for the fairy princess.” He turned to Caitlyn. “I have this...” He reached inside the door and brought back his hands cupped together. “I found it when I was working on the beach yesterday and thought of you.”

“What is it?” Cate stepped forward and placed her hands on his. “Oh, it’s beautiful, John!” she cried, lifting a star-shaped shell from his hands. “Mom, look!”

You know how star mad she is.

“Wow!” I wasn’t looking at the shell. I was looking at the man who knew my kids as well as I did. “Thank you.” Again, his eyes met mine. Oh wow. D, my knees actually went weak.

“And for the little bunny, I have a big fat—” he swept her into his arms, “hug!” He squeezed as he swung her from side to side.

I think I could have melted into a puddle on the floor right there and then if it wasn’t for the porch railing I was leaning against. I always thought Cal was a good father, but in comparison to the police officer turned carpenter-slash-handy-man who gave his time up to restore derelict piers, Cal was nothing.

“Have you had a good birthday, Bunny Rabbit?”

“It’s been awesome!” Lisa smiled. “Kimmi made me rabbit shaped pancakes for breakfast.”

“Speaking of rabbits, aren’t you forgetting something?” John asked. She looked puzzled. “He’s in the garden.”

“Really? You got me a rabbit?” John nodded. Lisa squealed and wriggled to be let down from his arms. “You’re the best dad in the world.”

I stepped forward to stop my girls from going inside. “Leave them a few minutes.”

The three girls ran to the garden to see the new rabbit. John smiled at me and took my hand. “I have something for you, too.” I was surprised. I didn’t expect anything. “I'm sorry, Kimmi,” he said, and stepped closer. “You can’t turn up here wearing that and not expect this.” He pushed me up against the door. One hand slipped under my jaw toward the back of my neck as he stepped into my personal space.

And I... well, I froze.

D, every muscle clenched, my eyes twisted shut, and I prayed to God he wouldn’t hurt me. I didn’t even breathe.

“Okay,” John whispered, stepping back. But he didn’t pull his hand away from my cheek. “That was not what I was expecting.”

Air passed through my lips, long enough for me to breathe normally again. He let the silence continue while my heart rate slowed. I knew he could feel it beneath his hand. But what could I tell him? Honestly, what could I say? But this man... he’s got to be too good to be true.

“Kimmi,” John said, “the last guy really hurt you?” His thumb caressed my cheek and my face turned into his palm. “But…” He stepped closer again, not too close because he knew it would freak me out. “I’ve tried, Kimmi.” He tilted my chin so I could look at him, and I knew whatever he was about to say was really important. “And I…” His lips brushed over mine and my heart fluttered. “I just can’t wait any longer.”

I’ve never been kissed like that before in my life! D, it was wonderful. I’m grinning like a school girl just thinking about the rush. You really don’t want to hear this, do you?

I’m going to tell you anyway. Darryl, he was so gentle. For such a long time it was as though his lips were barely there. Just testing, guiding. He didn’t take, he didn’t push, and he didn’t want, he just waited. He waited for me to relax against the door and then he stepped closer. Not too close. There was still air between us when his free hand found my waist.

And when he took the kiss deeper, it told me exactly what he wanted, but the rest of him told me it was fine. He’d wait for me. I’ve never felt that safe before in my life. Not even in those early days with Cal. I always had to say no.