Tainted Energy (The Energy Series Book 1) (9 page)

A tear
slipped down my cheek. "What?"

Wilma
met my eyes, a hint of wistfulness deepening the blue. "Yours is the
energy his was made for."

Lena

W
ilma grimaced and scrunched up her
nose, wistfulness now a memory. "At least, that's what you two have always
said, romantic fools."

Screw
breathing. I couldn't do it, anyway. We stood there, her hand holding mine,
while I absorbed what she said. My energy?
What did that even mean?
Maybe we all were crazy. Maybe this was a nightmare.

"You're
not dreaming, Lena. And I'm certainly not crazy, even if you might be."

I
snatched my hand away. "I didn't say that out loud, did I?"

Yup,
certifiable. Fit me with my new jacket. Make sure the sleeves are extra tight.

Wilma
took my hand back and closed her eyes. "You don't need a jacket yet,
honey. But I wouldn't count it out after I tell you a couple of things."

Her grip
was like iron, no matter how hard I tugged. "How're you doing that?"

Wilma's
voice slammed into my brain.
You can hear me, too, if you shut your brain up
long enough to listen.

She
spoke aloud again. "I have to be touching you in order to hear you, unless
you're in your energy form." She let go after that, crossing her arms and
tapping her temple. "But I can send you messages whenever I feel like it."

Energy
form?

"Who
else can hear me?" Stupid question, but I thought of all the people...a
brush in the hallway, a pat on the back...a kiss in the woods.

"Just
me." She snorted again. "But any Protector who has the ability can
talk inside your head. Call it a privilege."

The more
she said, the less I understood. Man, I wanted that jacket, a really tight one.
"A Protector?"

"A...a
guardian, I guess you could call it." She threw her arms in the air. "A
babysitter, more like."

"I
have a guardian? Does everyone have one?"

"No,
not everyone. You want to know
this
? After everything you've been
through?"

"Yes,
Wilma! This is exactly what I want to know." I ran a hand through my hair,
trying to calm my nerves. "And who's Tarek? And why does he seem to know
me?"
And why have I dreamed about him?
Didn't want to ask that
question, though. One crazy answer at a time was all I could handle.

She
huffed. "I told you who he is. He's been the thorn stabbing my ass since
taking you on. He's what you always called your heart, your other half."
She gave an exaggerated flutter of lashes as she tapped her chubby hands on her
chest.

"I've
never called him anything." Her theatrics were dangerously close to her
getting a throat punch. "I don't even know who he is." Well, not the
real
him
.

"Oh,
you know who he is. Maybe not during this cycle." She crossed her arms
again. "It's been kind of nice not having to deal with you two during your
fights, your 'adventures'...other things."

My face
flushed, and even the chilly night didn't help cool my cheeks. Time for a
subject change. "What do you mean, cycles?"

"Lives.
The cycles you've lived." She rubbed her forehead. "So many things
you weren't supposed to know. Keeping you out of trouble has been exhausting."

I had
the urge to wrap an arm around her tired shoulders, needing her near, even if
the desire to punch her still lingered. After a second of thinking it over, I
hugged her. Punching her might just end up giving me a black eye, anyway.

Smart
choice, because her tone became less combative, sort of nice even. "I've
never had to use so much energy keeping you safe before. You've always been
able to take care of yourself–and you had Tarek guarding you like a loyal
watchdog."

"Um…Sorry?"

"Not
your fault." A smile played at the corners of her mouth. "That's the
only difference this time around."

"This
time around? All this stuff, I can't…you need to tell me everything."

She
laughed. "We don't have that kind of time."

"Just
give me the basics. How many times have I, ah, lived?"

"For
you? Four counting this time. For me? Well, I've been playing this game longer
than I care to remember."

"So,
energy, like my soul, right? You're talking reincarnation?"

She
peered up at my face, her cheeks all chapped from the biting cold. "I
guess you could say that. And this isn't the only place energy travels. There's
many places...many worlds, dimensions."

It was
my turn to laugh. "So there's actually a Middle Earth where magical
dwarves and fairies prance around unicorns?"

Hmm,
yeah, like this is a normal conversation, here in the woods–with superhuman
Wilma.

"Are
you that dense, girl? Care to explain why you ended up in a place full of land
fish and water elephants? And where do you think Tarek went? Do you think he
climbed a tree or something?" She left the crook of my arm and stomped her
foot.

Dimensions?
Could it be possible? The idea was hard to swallow, but what Wilma said made
sense, even though the concept was totally irrational. Plus, she said all of it
with a straight, albeit puckered face.

Her
hand, ice cold, landed on my forearm. "Of course it's possible, and you
know it. Stop being such a dumbass." She let go and stomped her foot
again, blowing on her chapped fingers. "I hoped that trait would get
funneled out this time."

Wasn't
the first time she took a verbal jab at me, and it wouldn't be the first time I
ignored it. "And what about you? Who're you in all this?"

Wilma
stood proud, her head high. "I've been your Protector for three of your
lives." She smirked. "Though, this cycle has been most trying."

"Again…sorry?"

She
brushed some invisible dirt off her fleece. "And again, not your fault.
This dimension isn't exactly paradise."

"Well...why
did I choose this place?" I waved toward the park. "You said I chose
before, to stay with Tarek. Where did I live before?"

She bit
her lip as if contemplating whether to answer or not. "A place called
Exemplar."

"Okay,
and so why did I choose here this time?"

Wilma
closed her eyes tight and shook her head. "There are some things I can't
ever tell you."

"Did
I do something bad?"

"Please
let it go. If not, I'll have to leave."

Not
wanting her to go anywhere, I changed the subject again. "What's a Guide?"

Her
mouth puckered before she asked, "Huh?"

"You
said something about choosing to be a Guide."

After a
dramatic slap to her forehead, Wilma raised her hands to the sky. "Why do
I say too much?" She pointed a reddened finger in my face. "This
is
your fault, always getting me mad, making me say things I shouldn't."

"What
is it?"

She
huffed and stomped her foot yet again, but I kept my eyes level, not backing
down. The cold seemed to have no effect on me, heat rushing through my arms and
legs. "Wilma?"

"Oh,
fine!" She shoved a stray curl out of her eyes. "A Guide controls the
energy after the corporeal form dies. At least, they control it long enough to
decide which dimension suits it." I raised an eyebrow, prompting another
foot stomping. "You're energy readers, damn it. Your kind takes energy and
moves it to where it needs to go, where it deserves to go. Tarek and I...we're
Protectors, the ones who get you where you need to be, protect your kind when
you do stupid stuff."

I felt a
twinge of supremacy. "So, we're angels."

"Oh,
you like that idea, don't you?" She resumed her most comfortable stance:
arms across chest. "You're nothing like angels because angels don't exist.
Nobody's that pure."

Twinge
gone, but it had me thinking of something else. "Not even God?"

"They
love it when people call them gods, trust me."

"Who?"

Wow, she
hated answering questions. "The Energy Wardens."

"Energy
Wardens?"

"It's
like I'm talking to an infant." After another impressive huff, she
continued, "The beings in each realm who hold the released energy until
Guides can transport it." She scoffed. "Your so-called Gods."

A slap
in the face would've hurt less. All the information she grudgingly gave
denounced anything I'd ever known. And why wasn't Tarek supposed to find me?
And why was my mind going all ADD?

She
grabbed my arm and closed her eyes. After a second, she let go and yelled into
the night. "Why do I say too much?"

Yeah,
but not enough to let me know why I ended up in a trailer park. "Why wasn't
he supposed to know? You said we were...close."

"Close?
Ha! Now that's an understatement." She shook her head. "No, he wasn't
supposed to know. No one aside from me was supposed to have known. But I'm sure
you'll be seeing more of him." She looked up as though she expected him to
drop down any minute.

I
followed her gaze, a mixture of fear and excitement jutting through my body at
the idea of seeing him again. But one more question needed to be answered–the
most important question. "Who's trying to kill me?"

Her eyes
found mine. "I don't know, but whoever wants you gone, wants it to be
permanent."

"What
do you mean?"

"If
your body dies in Arcus, squid land, your energy stays–for good. The Warden
doesn't allow Guides to take any energy out of his dimension. And energy stuck
there…it's not pretty."

"What
should I do?" For the first time since leaving my room, fear had my knees
shaking.

She
grabbed my hands. "Stop being so afraid, Lena. It weakens your body, makes
you vulnerable, an easier target to whoever is trying to take you. And I...I'm
not allowed to be with you all the time."

Another
tear escaped, leaving a hot trail on my cheek. "I don't think I can."

"Yes,
you can. You're the strongest person I know." She wiped the wetness from
my face.

We heard
footsteps getting closer to our spot. The potheads were soon close enough for
us to make out their skinny bodies and smell the pungent smoke sitting on their
coats as they joked and punched each other.

"Go
home. Get some sleep, but know if your fear gets the best of you, you might end
up going through the bed again." She looked around me, at the boys, before
continuing. "I need to talk to Tarek, figure out what's going on."

"What
if I can't control the fear?"

Wilma
folded me in her generous arms. "I know you can."

"How
do you know?" I said, clinging to her.

"I
just do. Besides, I always know where you are. And if Tarek has his way–and he
usually does–not a soul will have the power to scare you. He won't let them."

"Don't
leave."

The boys
grew louder, but I held onto her, my arms refusing to let go.

Her
hands patted my back as her voice grew thick. "I don't have a choice."

She left
my arms and headed farther into the woods. In minutes the wind howled, followed
by complete silence.

Tarek

T
arek paced his front yard,
seething. For her to dismiss him, force him to leave?

Not this
time.

He tried
to open another portal at least a hundred times after Wilma dumped him on his
doorstep, but the bitch locked him out, barred him from Lena. Again.

He
raised his arm one more time, and still the sky refused to open. She couldn't
keep him out forever. Her strength might be superior to his, but it wasn't
infinite. That much he'd figured out over the years when he and Lena needed
time without her hovering…or when Lena needed Wilma away when she'd been
working on something.

Pain stabbed
his chest. During one of those times, when Lena had asked him to distract Wilma–piss
her off more like–so she could work, was when everything went crazy. If Wilma
were at Shalen that day…Lena might still be with him.

The
howling wind stopped his pacing. He turned to see Wilma drop from her portal
with more grace than his forced trip home. He stalked toward her, his fists
curling.

He
swung.

If it
were any other person, the hit would've dropped her to the ground.

Not
Wilma.

She
dodged, swinging with an uppercut, knocking him clean on his ass. Jaw
throbbing, he jumped to his feet and tried again. This time she grabbed his arm
and twisted it behind his back, bringing him to his knees in front of her. "As
much as I enjoy kicking your ass, there are more important things we need to be
doing."

She
pushed him to the ground, his face landing in a heap of mud. Tarek stood, wiped
the grit from his eyes, and hoped his hatred smacked right into her
self-righteousness. "Seventeen years, Wilma. Seventeen years you've kept
her from me. And when I manage to find her, you send me away?"

The
woman didn't flinch. "I couldn't tell you or anyone else. It goes against
the rules. You of all people should understand what would happen if Lena found
out about all this."

Desperation
caused his voice to pitch and crack. "You've broken the rules before to
keep her safe." He pulled his hair to transfer the emotional ache to
physical. "You knew she faced a cycle of pain, and you let them do it
anyway."

Fire
shot through Wilma's eyes. "I made sure they didn't eliminate her energy.
I
did what I could to keep her alive. Now all that's fucked." She swiped at
the dirt on her cheek and curled her lip. "She knows about us. And someone
else knows where she is, too."

Panic
tickled the back of Tarek's neck, anger changing to something worse. Right. The
main reason Mateusz helped him. To find the rogue. "Do you know who?"

She
squeezed the bridge of her nose. "No. All I know is something tried to
pull her into Arcus–twice–and succeeded with the last attempt. I pulled her out
before she drowned in that damn river." She hesitated. "I saw him.
Casimir. Standing at the bank." She glanced over his shoulder. "He
didn't even try to get her…and the way he looked at me..."

He
slumped to the ground, landing on a mound of dirt. Arcus? Shit. And that the
dimension's Warden had something to do with it…double shit. One rogue was easy.
Tack on a Warden? Not so easy. "I need to be there."

"For
what? What can you do that I can't? Besides, the Synod would never allow it."
She began to pace. "I tried to figure it out on my own the first time, but
the girl can't control the fear." Eyes wild, she stopped the frantic grass
stomping. "Casimir has gotten his hands on some Protector energy. It's
weak, but that'd be the only way he could pull her through. That's the
only
explanation that makes sense. We need to tell the Synod. I definitely need to
tell Cassondra, and–"

He
leaned forward, alarm rippling through his spine. "Wait, no, Wilma–"

"They
have more resources, ways to find out...and Cassondra can convince Casimir to stop
whatever it is he's doing, give up the Protector energy."

"Cassondra
will find a way to end her cycle. It's happened to others who went up against her
brother."

Her face
scrunched, the pain of the truth blotting her cheeks. "No, no, they'll–"

"Destroy
her energy permanently as soon as the opportunity arose, especially if Arcus is
involved. You know Cassondra." His eyes pleaded with hers. "Please,
Wilma. I know you love her. Don't let those bastards decide her fate again."

It was
common knowledge she'd pleaded for Lena's life. Protectors weren't allowed to
intervene when the Synod decided fates of so-called criminal Guides. But when
they accused Lena, Wilma stepped in and pleaded for her life, not caring about
rules or convention.

If she
hadn't, Lena would've been executed, her energy dispersed–deleted. If the
bastards found out about the most recent development, they wouldn't listen to
Wilma this time around. They'd send in the authority, get rid of the problem.
Get rid of Lena for good.

He
stood, keeping his eyes on Wilma. If she said no, he'd get Lena to a dimension
where no one would be able to touch her and figure out the rest later. But what
he said seemed to be working because she stopped pacing, and the pain in her
face abated. "How're we gonna pull it off without them finding out?"

"It's
already handled."

She
snorted. "How? Mateusz? You still trust that old bastard?"

"Of
course I trust him."

A sneer
twisted her lips, and her eyes hardened. "Lemme guess. He's the one who
told you about Lena."

Tarek
shook his head, making sure his face gave nothing away.

"Bullshit,"
she said. "If we're doing this, there's no secrets, got it?"

He took
one breath and nodded. "Fine, yes, he told me. He also said…Shit. He also
told me an Exemplian is messing with her."

"This
is getting messier and messier by the second." Wilma bit her lip, lost
inside her head.

Walking
to the closet tree, he plucked two apples from the lowest branch. He threw her
one and crunched into the other after wiping some of the mud off his mouth with
a sleeve. The tart juice ran to the back of his throat and dribbled on his
chin. She held hers and squeezed it as though it were a piece of clay. Tarek
kept eating, studying a patch of lilacs. He knew she'd agree. He'd just have to
wait her out, let her make the decision.

Wilma
sighed, putting her head down. "She's different this time around."

"I'm
aware."

"You
can't tell her why she's there. If you do, the Synod will never let her come
back next cycle. They'll claim her repentance false."

"Do
you think I'm stupid?"

She
ignored that, answering loud and clear, and said, "She's...nicer this
time, sensitive." Her eyes drooped, and the corners of her mouth turned
down. "She's been through a lot, dealing with issues you will have to
endure quietly. You have to let her suffer. It's part of her punishment."

Fear
crept into the corners of his brain, twisting his gut. "I'll protect her."

"You
can't, not from everything."

He took
another bite of his apple instead of answering. Allowing her to suffer...he'd
have a hard time. But if it were the only way to bring her back here, he'd
deal. He'd have to.

She made
a sour face. "And you're dressed like a giant fairy. All you need are some
glittery wings. Probably scared the hell out of her."

The suit
was still active with a slight hum emitting from the fabric every time he
moved. He didn't enjoy wearing it–chaffed his skin–but the suit saved his ass
from animal attacks, sink holes, grabby vines...angry Protectors, just about
anything a dimension could throw at him. "It's for protection." Like
she didn't already know.

"From
what?" She smirked, shoving her hair out of her eyes. "Do you ever
bother to crack open one of those books?"

Heat
reached his cheeks, burning them with guilt. "I didn't have time to
research the place."

"Hmm,
and what about the last seventeen years? Almost eighteen? Didn't have time then
either?"

Ouch. "They're
her books."

The
breeze from Wilma's arms flipped the ends of his hair as she waved the flabby
limbs in the air. "All that work, all those notes. You could've figured
out what happened, what she knew...why she was accused of siphoning good energy
to Arcus."

He
looked at his half-eaten apple. "Those notes wouldn't have told me where
they sent her. Only you could have done that."

"Hey,
I did what I could to keep her safe. You've done nothing to help her. Nothing!"

Tarek
threw his apple and confronted the squat woman, forcing his fists to stay at
his sides. "I've been
looking
for her. And I
could have
helped her
if
I knew where she was." He looked down at his suit and
all the fight drained away. "I hate that she doesn't even know who I am."

She
opened the door with a wave of her hand and tossed the apple into the patch of
lilacs–ignoring his tantrum. "We're doing this, but we're doing it my way."
She went right to Lena's desk and flipped through the Arcus text. "Right
in front of your nose, this book lays, and you don't think to take a look at
it? Moron."

As she
shuffled through the open book, he watched her mess with things that hadn't
been touched since the night Lena left. It took everything he had not to yell. "I'll
do whatever you want as long as I get to be with her." He cleared his
throat, trying not to sound like a sniveling twit. "Cassondra is being
Paired. We have a month."

"Well,
we need to get busy," she said. She looked up after finding a folded bunch
of papers in the middle of the book. Holding them up, she gave him a sneer. "Unbelievable.
Took me two minutes to find this." She unfolded the papers. "The
names, Tarek! Look at all the suspects she had sitting here, waiting for you to
find."

If it
were possible to feel any stupider…"They're her–"

"Shut.
Up. Don't even say it again." She pulled out the chair and shot him a
dirty look. "Listen up. I'll look through these to see if any names pop
out. Maybe we can find the rogue.
Maybe,
we can find out how she got a
Tainted in the first place. Once we do find the bastard, we'll go to Cassondra
with the evidence. We'll tell her we won't go above her head if she leaves Lena
out of it. That'll give her a chance to take care of Casimir without Synod
interference."

He
cringed. No, he didn't like that idea much. "And what if she doesn't bite
and still wants Lena gone?"

Wilma's
face hardened as her hand crinkled the thick fold of notes. "I'll send you
a message," she pointed to his head to indicate how she'd send it, "and
you can get Lena as far away as possible." As hard as the woman was, she
couldn't hide the pain creeping its way into her voice. "I'll stay away so
they don't follow me."

Hiding his
euphoria took a lot of willpower, especially when Wilma's hurt was so evident. "So,
you're letting me stay with her?"

She
swallowed a few times before directing her attention toward the desk. In a
shaky voice, she said, "You don't catch on quick, do you?"

He bowed
his head. "Thank you."

When she
didn't respond, he went to change. He knew how she felt. He'd been feeling it
for seventeen years.

As soon
as Wilma unleashed Tarek's power, he opened the portal. He had no idea why she
let him go, but he wasn't about to argue. Wilma could have the notes as long as
he had Lena.