Tahn (43 page)

“You are reaching for me too,” he said with tears in his eyes.

“I can’t help it. God has placed you in my path, no matter which way I turn.”

He lifted her hand and kissed it softly. “I would be honored to join you for dinner, my lady.”

She suddenly looked up at the gentle slope behind him and laughed. Lined up behind a bush were Duncan, Rane, and Temas, watching them. Tahn turned and saw them. “You did mean the table for everyone, didn’t you?” he asked.

“This time. But tomorrow, or soon, we could picnic, if it is all right with my father.”

He didn’t know what to say. Her acceptance—what could it be but another gift from God? He felt suddenly lighter, like he could float right into the clouds above them. Who could imagine that even God could conceive such a thing? This beautiful soul, willing to love him!

It was a glorious day, the only damper on it being the thoughts of Samis that crowded his mind as he instructed new guards. Samis was like the devil, still out there somewhere, hoping to find a way to destroy the good Tahn had found.

Since hearing that Samis might be sick, Tahn had not known what to expect. But now he knew he was coming, as sure as if the voice of God had told him. Samis would not give up, not till one of them was dead. And he would go to any length to get here for the opportunity to face Tahn again. It was just a matter of time. Tahn taught the soldiers with that in mind. They might as well be prepared right along with him to finish it as quickly as possible.

But it was not hard to lay down such thoughts while in Netta’s company. It was a pleasure to accept Benn’s suggestion that the two of them take the children riding. Such a troop they made, seven little ones in hats and coats, trotting along so happily. It was like an incredible dream that life could be so good.

He spent the night again in the house with all of his boys and dreamed he was in the church listening to Jarel’s hymn.

The next day was unseasonably warm, and they had their picnic. Tahn fell asleep on the blanket outside and woke to the snuggling of children beside him.

“I love you, Mr. Dorn,” Temas whispered.

“I love you too, child.” He looked up at the blue sky and smiled. Such a gift was love!

“We’re glad you took us from Samis,” Rane added. He looked so serious for a six-year-old. “He might have killed us by now.”

“He won’t ever find us, will he?” Temas looked suddenly worried, and Tahn sat up and put his arm around her.

“You’ll never see him again. You have my word.”

“Can I tell you something?” Rane asked. “I threw your whip away in the rocks when you went back for Vari. I was scared you might change your mind about it. You weren’t mad, were you?”

He pulled the boy to him and hugged him along with Temas. “I was delighted to have it gone. You did me a favor.”

“I’m not sure I understand that.”

“It plagued me to see the thing,” Tahn told him. “I can’t bear a whip, not even for a horse.”

Briant had walked up beside them and sat down. “Did you get it from him a lot?”

Something still shook inside Tahn when he thought of it. “Too much,” he answered soberly.

But Rane took his hand. “That’s why you helped us. I wish someone had been there for you.”

“God bless you, child,” Tahn answered softly. “The Lord was there, I expect. I just couldn’t see him for the darkness.”

It was a peaceful evening, and cooling considerably. After dinner in the house, Netta wrapped a cloak around her and asked Tahn to join her for a walk.

He was hesitant. It had been another wonderful day, but was there such a thing as too much pleasantness? And being alone in the lady’s company made him anxious. He well remembered their kiss and feared there could be another one.

But he would not refuse her. With his heart pounding, he left the house with her, well aware of her quiet thoughtfulness.

“Why do I make you nervous?” she asked.

“I’m not used to this.”

“Nor am I. Only once before did I ever really love a man this way.”

He stopped and stared at her, his feet suddenly itching to run. But she took his hand.

“I need to talk about it, Tahn,” she said. “I know it is hard, but it will help us. If we can talk about him, there’ll be no barrier there.”

“I’m sorry.” He hung his head. “That’s all I can say.”

She lifted his head again gently. “You’re like him. So sensitive to my feelings. So gentle at heart.”

“I’ve never been called gentle.”

“You’ve never been understood, then. Even by yourself. It hurt you to hurt him, didn’t it?”

“I would not let myself think about it.”

“What would have happened if you had?”

“I don’t know, Lady. Insanity, probably.” He sighed. “I don’t think I can do this.”

She hugged him quickly. “Tahn, two days before we were married, Karll told me our life together might not be long or easy. He gave me a chance to walk away, knowing he had enemies and something might happen. But I couldn’t leave him, regardless. And I think my father has always felt guilty that we were not guarded more carefully.”

“You had guards,” he said. “They just weren’t expecting anything.”

With her hand in his, he walked to the pond and then around it toward the east wall.

“Karll would be pleased with what you’ve become,” she told him suddenly.

“I can’t grasp how you could say that, Netta.”

“He loved God. He hated the thought of anyone suffering wrongly. If he had known of you and what you were trapped in, he would have longed to help.”

“A terrible loss I gave you and your people.” He looked up at the gathering clouds.

“I’m not trying to make you sad, Tahn. I just want you to see that I have peace with it now. I will always love him, but I know I have the blessing of God to have you here.” She stopped and took his other hand. “God wanted you in the Trilett house. He wanted you to have my father’s authority behind you. And you are a warrior for a reason. In God’s hands now, you will be a blessing in justice for people in need. You already have been.” She kissed his cheek softly and then released his hands. “I had to tell you that. Do you want to continue our walk?”

“I think so.”

She smiled, and they walked together along the eastern edge of the quiet pond.

31

I
n Onath, Samis and Lucas acted the part of common travelers and stopped at the shop where Mattius had stayed to watch the church. He was gone, and it seemed he had been for days. They asked an old man sitting outside where they might find the saver of Triletts to bear him a gift. The old man gave them the directions without a worry. They probably seemed harmless enough, just an elderly gent and his rather distracted son.

Samis was in a good temper as they left the houses behind them. He began to sing, a melody familiar to all his men from the times he’d been drunk or celebrating some special victory. Lucas rode in silence behind him, thinking he’d lost his mind. There was no way a man of any sense would ride up to the Trilett estate like that. But then he realized Samis didn’t care if he had the element of surprise. Maybe he didn’t even want it. He wanted Tahn’s attention. He seemed to think the rest would take care of itself.

By the willow tree again, Netta was talking about the church and Father Anolle’s hope that Tahn and all the children would choose to worship with them.

But Tahn was suddenly quiet, and he turned his head toward the wall at the north, listening.

“Tahn? What is it?”

He held up his hand. She watched him in tense silence, wondering what he might have heard.

“Go inside,” he whispered.

“What’s wrong?”

“Please, Netta, go to your father.”

But she lingered, seeing something frightening in his eyes.

“Samis is here,” he told her. “I know I heard him. And I don’t want you out here.” He turned toward the gate.

“Where are you going?”

“He’s come for me. And I might as well go and greet him.”

“No, Tahn!” she cried. “There are guards if he tries to enter! Let them take care of this!”

“I can’t, Lady. It’s my responsibility.”

She was suddenly afraid of what he meant by that. “You don’t have to do this.”

“Yes. I do.” He reached and touched her cheek. “I don’t expect you to understand. But please, Netta. Go. Trust God for me.”

He was walking away from her, despite her protest, toward the gate and what would have to be a wrenching meeting for him. Something about his look terrified her. She knew he was prepared to fight. But the tyrant mercenary would mean it to the death. Surely he knew that!

“No, Tahn!” she called after him.

He turned and looked at her with compassion. “Don’t, Lady,” he said. “Your father says he still has a hold. I have to face him.”

Dear God!
her heart cried.
If I cannot prevent it, surely you can!

But Tahn was already out of her sight. She turned to the house as he had said, but she could not bear to obey him. She dropped to her knees on the spot.

Father Almighty, protect his life again. Strengthen him to do what he must, but give him the courage to let it rest in your hands, not his own.

At the gate, a guard stood to his post, looking out over the wall anxiously.

“Samis is here,” Tahn told him in a quiet voice. “Go quickly and alert the others. I will see him first. But no matter what happens, he must not be allowed to escape.”

As the first guard departed in obedience, two others approached. “Be prepared,” he told them. “We can’t be sure he’s alone.”

He stood at the gate for a moment and looked out, marveling at how dark the night now seemed when only moments before with the lady it had been so much lighter. Every sound had stopped. But Samis would still be there, waiting. And Tahn refused to hide. He pulled open the gate and stood clutching an iron rail.

“Samis!”