Taffy Sinclair 004 - Taffy Sinclair and the Romance Machine Disaster (3 page)

"
At Mama Mia
'
s,
"
chirped Christie.
"
We
'
ll be watching for you and Randy to get there.
"

Then my four best friends left me standing all alone
.

I
was so nervous that my teeth were starting to chatter. I waited in the stands the way Randy had told me to do. He told me that he would be out of the gym just as soon as he took a shower and changed his clothes and then we would walk to Mama Mia
'
s Pizzeria, which was only three blocks away.

It was a cold fall day, and I zipped up my jacket and watched the wind blow leaves around in circles along with empty popcorn boxes and mimeographed programs, and I worried all over again about what we would talk about. What if he wanted to talk about football and those three touchdowns? Sure, I had seen them, but my knowledge about football ended there. I could never fake a thing like that. Or maybe neither one
of us would come up with anything to talk about and we would just sit and sta
re at each other all afternoon.

"
Hi, Jana. Thanks for waiting.
"

"
Oh,
"
I said.
"
Hi, Randy.
"
I was so deep in thought that I hadn
'
t seen or heard Randy coming, but there he was, looking at me and smiling, water droplets sparkling in his dark hair. I felt better already. I could spend the rest of the day just looking at his kind and sensitive smile.

That smile gave me confidence I didn
'
t know I had, so I got brave and said,
"
That was a great game, and those three touchdowns you made were really super.
"

Randy beamed.
"
Did you really think so?
"

"
Sure.
"
I wanted to tell him how scared I had been when he was tackled, but I was afraid he might think I was being silly.

"
Playing football really makes me hungry. I can
'
t wait to get that bi-i-ig, juicy pizza. What kind of pizza do you like, anyway?
"

"
Deep-dish pepperoni, green pepper, and mushroom,
"
I said.

"
You
'
re kidding.
"
He looked at me as if he were in total shock.
"
That
'
s my absolute favorite. I order it every time I go to Mama Mia
'
s.
"

"
Really?
"
I said, echoing his surprise.
"
So do I, but most kids I know won
'
t go near green peppers and mushrooms.
"

"
That
'
s their tough luck. They don
'
t know what they
'
re missing.
"

Randy gave me a big grin, and I grinned back. I had been right. We did have things in common.

When we got to Mama Mia
'
s it was so packed with kids that we could ba
rely get in the front door, but
once we got inside something really weird happened. All over the place kids stopped talking and stared at us. Especially the girls. I knew they were all imagining what it would be like to be walking into Mama Mia
'
s with a date and how it would feel if that date were Randy Kirwan.

"
Oh, hi, Randy. Why don
'
t you sit here? We can squeeze in one more person.
"

Explosions went off in my heart. I
'
d know that voice anywhere. It was Taffy Sinclair, and she and Mona Vaughn were sitting at a big table with Mark Peters and Scott Daly, Randy
'
s two best friends. Taffy was smiling at Randy and batting her eyelashes. It was her fake smile, the icky sweet one she always used on cute boys, but this time she was overdoing it. Beside her, poor ugly Mona Vaughn was trying to imitate Taffy
'
s icky sweet smile. She was even trying to bat her eyelashes like Taffy. Usually I felt sorry for Mona since she worshiped the very ground Taffy walked on and followed her around as if she were Taffy
'
s slave. But this time I was furious, even at Mona.

"
Look, Randy. Someone
'
s leaving over there,
"
I said triumphantly. I was talking to him and pointing to a table where three high school boys were getting up, but
I was looking at Taffy Sinclair. She was looking back, and if looks could kill, we would both have been goners.

"
Great,
"
said Randy.
"
Thanks, Taffy. We
'
ll see you later.
"

Over my dead body, I thought. Then I stuck my nose in the air and followed Randy to
our
table. Everyone had stopped staring at us and started talking again but not before they saw me get the best of Taffy Sinclair.

When the waitress stopped at our table, Randy ordered us a large deep-dish pepperoni, green pepper, and mushroom pizza and two large Cokes.

When the food came, I took a bite and strung the cheese out in front of me the way I always did, winding it back around my tongue. Across the table, Randy was doing the very same thing. I thought about Taffy Sinclair, and I was so happy I thought I
'
d die.

"
What is your favorite animal?
"
He asked the question so abruptly that the Coke I was drinking almost snorted out my nose.

"
I love dogs,
"
I said.
"
But our landlord won
'
t let us have one in the apartment.
"

"
Dogs are my favorites, too. I have a dog named Heidi. She loves to play, and I
'
ll bet you
'
d really like her.
"

My heart skipped a beat. I had seen Heidi once when I rode past his house on my bicycle. She was a keeshond, and she was definitely one of the most beautiful dogs I had ever seen. I couldn
'
t believe it. Randy was practically asking me over to play with her.

The more we talked, the more we found we had in common, and we talked faster and faster, almost interrupting each other sometimes.

"
I absolutely hate onions,
"
said Randy.

"
Me, too. And brussels sprouts. Do you like brussels sprouts?
"

"
Are you kidding? They
'
re gross!
"
Randy made a face that was so funny I doubled over laughing.

We found out that we both love going to amusement parks and riding the roller coaster and going to the beach and watching fireworks on the Fourth of July. I couldn
'
t remember when I
'
d had so much fun. I was glowing all over. And best of all, my tongue hadn
'
t gone numb once.

Just then something caught my eye. It was Beth and she was looking at me and waving like crazy. I looked back, and she pointed toward the ladies
'
room. I knew that meant that she had to talk to me, so I told Randy that I would be right back and followed her.

"
What do you want?
"
I asked, but before she could answer, girls were pouring into the ladies
'
room.

"
Oh, Jana. It
'
s so exciting,
"
gushed Melanie.

"
Yeah,
"
said Alexis.
"
We
'
re dying to know what
'
s going on.
"

Suddenly questions were coming at me from all directions, and they were coming so fast that I couldn
'
t answer any of them.

"
Did you ask him out, or did he ask you?
"

"
You can tell he
'
s having a good time. What are you talking about?
"

"
Did he say if any other boys are going to ask girls out?
"

"
I have to get back,
"
I said.
"
Randy
'
s going to wonder what happened to me. I
'
ll tell you all about it later.
"

I started to leave when I felt a hand on my arm. It was Melanie and she had a dreamy look on her face.
"
Scott is one of Randy
'
s best friends,
"
she said.
"
Just think! Maybe he will get the idea and ask me out, too.
"

I felt like a queen as I hurried back to our table. Usually Taffy was the envy of every girl in the sixth grade, but now it was me. And if any boys asked them out, they would be grateful to me for starting it all. I was so happy I thought I
'
d die.

Finally Randy and I finished every last crumb of the pizza and drained our Cokes. We even ate all the ice out of the cups. We had been sitting in our booth so long that the place was almost empty. Even Taffy and Mona were gone. The waitress was beginning to give us dirty looks so Randy stood up and said,
"
I
'
ll pay for this, and then I guess we
'
d better go.
"

I nodded and started to follow him when I got this great idea.
"
I
'
ll be along in a minute,
"
I said.
"
My sneaker is untied.
"

Bending over, I undid my perfectly tied left sneaker and retied it as slowly as I could. When I could see that Randy wasn
'
t looking at me I scanned his side of the table for something—anything—that I could take for a souvenir of our very first date. I couldn
'
t take the pizza pan, of course, and his paper napkin was covered with tomato sauce. Then I spotted his straw. That was it. The perfect souvenir. Not only had he drunk his Coke out of that straw, but his lips had touched it. I closed my eyes and imagined touching my lips to the same place. It would be almost like a kiss. Grabbing the straw, I jammed it into the pocket of my jacket before he looked around. I
'
d die if he saw me. He
'
d think I was some kind of nut.

My heart was pounding as we left Mama Mia
'
s, and I couldn
'
t help wonder
ing if my face was as red as it
felt. If Randy suspected anything, he didn
'
t show it, and we walked home still talking about the things we liked and didn
'
t like.

I couldn
'
t remember ever getting from Mama Mia
'
s to my apartment building so fast, but suddenly we were there. We stood on the step for a couple of minutes, and then he said,
"
Well, I guess I
'
d better be going. I
'
ll see you Monday.
"

I watched him walk down the street thinking that it was true love. I knew that not even Taffy Sinclair could come between us now, and I pulled Randy
'
s straw out of my pocket and put it to my lips
.

T
hat night I slept with Randy
'
s straw under my pillow where I could touch it anytime I wanted to. I had called my friends right away since they were dying to know all about my date, but I didn
'
t tell them about my souvenir. I felt a little guilty, but it was just too private to tell anyone about, even my four very best friends in the world.

All weekend I tried to practice what I would say to Randy when I saw him at school on Monday, but nothing sounded right. Even though we had a lot in common, I couldn
'
t just walk up to him and start talking about deep-dish pepperoni, green pepper, and mushroom pizza or about watching fireworks on the Fourth of July. I would have to wait and see what he said first.

As it turned out, he didn
'
t say anything. When my friends and I got to the school ground, Randy was out on the ball field tossing around a football with Scott Daly and Mark Peters. I was sure that any minute he would look in my direction, and then when he saw me he would wave and maybe even come over to talk to me. But he didn
'
t even look my way. He didn
'
t wave, and he certainly didn
'
t come over to talk to me. He just kept right on tossing that stupid football back and forth as if it were the most important thing in the world. My heart sank into my shoes. Had he forgotten about all the things we had in common already?

"
He
'
s probably telling Mark and Scott all about your great date,
"
Christie offered hopefully.

"
Or maybe he
'
s just shy,
"
said Melanie.

"
Don
'
t worry about Randy right now,
"
said Beth.
"
Look who
'
s coming.
"

I looked, and I thought I
'
d die. It was Curtis Trowbridge, and he was waving and running toward us.
"
Hey, guys. Guess what?
"
he shouted. He was practically breathless when he stopped beside us.
"
You
'
ll never guess what Wiggins is cooking up. You
'
re going to love it.
"

Curtis looked really excited. I knew that there was no way to get rid of him now.
"
So what
'
s your big news?
"
I asked.

"
Yeah, Curtis. What is it this time?
"
asked Beth in a bored voice. Curtis was always coming up with something that he thought was big news.

"
Sorry. I
'
d love to tell you, but I can
'
t.
"
Curtis cocked his head to one side and winked at me.
"
Actually, nobody is supposed to know about it, but a good newspaperman is always on top of the news.
"

"
So how did you find out this huge secret?
"
I challenged.

"
A good newspaperman always protects his sources.
"
I started to ask him if his source was a water fountain since he got most of his big news by hanging around the water fountain in front of the office and eavesdropping on the teachers talking to Mrs. Winchell, the principal, but I didn
'
t. I just shrugged, and my friends and I left him standing there and headed for the door.

The first bell rang just as we got to our lockers. I threw my jacket on the hook inside the door and grabbed my books off the shelf. Just as I slammed my locker door and started toward the classroom I saw something that made me stop. It was Randy, and he was coming up the hall with Mark and Scott. It was the perfect chance. I was sure that Randy hadn
'
t said anything to me on the school ground because he and his friends had been too busy tossing the football around. And besides, they were too far away. But now he would have to walk right past me to get to class. I told my friends to go on inside, and I leaned against the door to Wiggins
'
s room and pretended to be looking for something in my notebook.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see three pairs of sneakers coming closer as I flipped notebook pages.
My heart was pounding. I had it all planned. I would look up, act surprised to see him, and give him a big smile. Then he would turn those gorgeous brown eyes toward me and flash his 1,000-watt smile.

"
Hey, Randy. Look who
'
s waiting for you.
"
It was Joel Murphy, and he and Keith Masterson had come up behind Randy and Mark and Scott.

"
Yeah, Randy,
"
teased Keith.
"
It
'
s Jana Banana. Your girlfriend! Randy Kirwan
'
s got a girlfriend.
"

"
Lay off, guys,
"
said Mark.

Joel and Keith grabbed each other and faked kissing, making loud smooching noises. I was so embarrassed I thought I
'
d die. Joel and Keith were doubling over with laughter. I didn
'
t know what Randy was doing. I couldn
'
t look anymore.

I slammed my notebook shut and raced into the room, sliding into my seat as fast as I could. Jana Banana! I hated that name. I stared straight ahead as the room filled up. I didn
'
t dare look at Randy or else somebody might start teasing him. Or even worse, they might call me Jana Banana in front of the class.

Boys are such jerks, I thought. Especially sixth-grade boys. Only Randy was different, but what could he do with two total jerks for friends?

I had forgotten all about Curtis
'
s big news, but the class had barely gotten started when Wiggins stood beside her desk and held her hand up for silence the way she always did when she was about to make a big announcement. Wiggins is short for Winifred Wiggins, and she
'
s been teaching sixth grade ever since the school building was built right after the Korean War. Nobody knows how old she is, but she seems pretty old. I think it
'
s a wonder that she
'
s still alive. Anyway, there she stood with her red curls bobbing and her eyes positively sparkling behind her wire-framed glasses.

"
Class!
"
she said, punching the air with her index finger for emphasis.
"
We are going to begin a unit on computers. As I
'
m sure most of you know, computers are becoming bigger and bigger parts of our everyday lives. Some of you may already have computers at home.
"

A bunch of kids raised their hands and waved them around to show off that they already had home computers. I sighed and threw a dirty look at the back of Curtis Trowbridge
'
s head. If this was the exciting surprise that Wiggins was cooking up, it was pretty boring. But Wiggins wasn
'
t through with us yet.

"
Before we start learning computer literacy and practicing on the machines in the Media Center, we are going to do a little experiment that will be a lot of fun and will also help you understand just how computers work.

"
For this experiment, you will each fill out a questionnaire about things you like and dislike. Then I will feed your answers into the big computer in the principal
'
s office. This afternoon, right after lunch, you will each get a personal reply from the computer. It will tell you which boy and which girl in this class you have the most things in common with. I guarantee that there will be some surprises, and I know you
'
ll all have a lot of fun.
"

My eyes opened wide. I was thinking about those computer dating places where they find the person you have a lot in common with and arrange a date for you. That was how they did it, wasn
'
t it? They gave you a questionnaire to fill out and then fed it into their computer to find out who you matched up with. In one advertisement I saw in a magazine they had even called the computer a
"
Romance Machine.
"
It was too fabulous to be true. Good old Wiggins. Because of her, both my questionnaire and Randy
'
s would go into the machine, and then the whole world would know how perfect we were for each other.

Wiggins was going on and on about computers and how they worked, and I tried to listen. But mostly all I could think about was Randy and our date. I wondered if he was thinking about me, too, but I was still afraid to look at him.

The questions on the sheets Wiggins sent down each row were fill in the blank, with the blank being what you liked or disliked. I tried to listen as she explained how that made it easier for the computer to compare answers. I knew I had to concentrate on what I was doing. If I goofed, it could mean disaster. I looked at the first question. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD?

That was easy. Deep-dish pepperoni, green pepper, and mushroom pizza. I started to write that down, but then I stopped. Randy had said that was his favorite kind of pizza, but was it his absolutely favorite kind of food? Maybe he was a fried chicken nut. Or maybe his favorite food in the whole world was something weird like liverwurst or oxtail soup. I decided to skip that one for now and come back to it later.

Next came another
"
What do you like best
"
question. WHAT SPORT DO YOU LIKE BEST? Up until last weekend I would have probably answered
"
bicycling,
"
since I love to ride my bike, or
"
swimming,
"
since I like to go to the beach in the summertime. But things were different now that Randy had asked me to watch his football game. Surely football was his favorite sport, so I wrote
"
FOOTBALL
"
in large letters.

The rest was about the same. Even on the other side of the paper, the
"
Like the Least
"
questions were pretty standard stuff. Still, I couldn
'
t help thinking that I didn
'
t really know very much about Randy. I had been so sure that we had tons of things in common, but now that I had to fill out this questionnaire, I wasn
'
t sure anymore.

As I looked back over the questions, I tried to figure out how he would answer them. Under
"
Like the Least
"
I had just naturally put
"
Dust the house.
"
But what would Randy say? He had probably never dusted the house in his life. Maybe I should change it to
"
Take out the garbage
"
or
"
Mow the lawn,
"
I thought, even though I live in an apartment and don
'
t have a lawn to mow. Randy has a lawn, and it
'
s probably his job to mow it. I was getting confused. This was a lot harder than I had imagined it would be.

Finally I settled on
"
Take out the garbage
"
for the chore I liked the least, and I put
"
Deep-dish pepperoni, green pepper, and mushroom pizza
"
for the food I liked best. I was thinking about some of the other ones that might need changing when Wiggins held up her hand again.

"
Time
'
s up,
"
she said.
"
Pass all the papers forward. You
'
ll get the results after lunch.
"

Waiting for afternoon and the results would be like waiting for Christmas. It would take forever to come. And when it did and we got the results back, what if I found out that Randy and I didn
'
t have enough things in common after all? What if we each matched up with someone else? My heart dropped into my shoes. What if he matched up with Taffy Sinclair?

No, I thought. Randy and I were meant for each other, and the Romance Machine was going to prove i
t.