Sweet Surrender (21 page)

He thought she would top him from the bottom, but so far, she hadn’t. Her mouth and the actions she did, drove him mad. He wanted nothing more than for her to submit to him, fully. If he wanted that from her, he would have to tell her. That was the hard part. Every time he talked to her all words went out the window. When she spoke, he would stare at her mouth. He would hear nothing as to what she was saying. The only thing that he thought of was her mouth on him, again, in any way possible.

After his shower, he reached for his clothing for tonight’s party. Zipping up his leather pants, he pulled out his leather bag. Grabbing his toys from the bottom drawer, Dom threw them in. He always used his own toys at the club. That was one of the rules—you want to play, you bring your own toys. Never share with others. Unless you knew them personally.

This was one of those parties that he wanted to bring Chantal to, so he could see how she would act in his environment. His main dream was for her to submit to him, completely. Need him, in ways that only he could fulfill. Want him, with everything she had, and more. He would make it his mission, no matter how long it took, for her to surrender to him and only him.

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S
kylar walked into her house, and towards the kitchen. She had no idea how she was going to tell Nate about ending the engagement. She needed to focus on getting past what had happened, feeling better for her and move on. He wasn’t going to like it, but it had to be done.

Placing the ring on her dresser, she made her way into the bathroom. She needed more time to herself, without him around. She loved him with everything she had, but that wasn’t enough in her book. She still had not forgiven him for what he had done to her; the cheating was the hardest to get over. His anger was another. The way he reacted towards things scared her sometimes. She placed her hand over her belly, and her child kicked at her hand at that moment.

She wanted to raise her child in a safe and stress-free environment. If Nate couldn’t control his temper or outbursts, she didn’t want to stop him from seeing his own child, but she would for its safety. She knew he would never hurt their child physically, but emotionally he could. He had done the same thing to her.

Sliding into the shower, she knew it would be best if he saw the therapist with her. They needed to sort things out between them. She also felt like he was possibly using her. She didn’t know why, but she did. Nate did a lot for her, but she wanted him to do it because he wanted to, not because someone had asked him to.

Damn, this was going to be hard. She loved him, with all her heart, but she needed the trust back and that was a hard thing for her after what he had done.

“Skylar?” Nate called out.

“In the shower,” she yelled.

Hearing the door open, she saw the outline of his body opposite the shower door. “Where did you go?”

Well, here goes nothing
. “I had an appointment.” Turning the water off and opening the door, she reached for a towel and dried herself. She felt Nate’s eye roam over her body, heat seeped between her legs. She was not going to think of sex right now, but her body wasn’t listening to her. When her eyes landed on him, she held back a moan. Dressed in jeans only, motor oil covered his chest.
Goddamn it
. He looked sexy as sin like that in front of her.

Grinning down at her, he moved closer, and she stepped back away from him. “Skylar?”

“We need to talk, Nate.” As she said that, she moved past him into her room. Pulling on a long t-shirt and panties, she sat at the end bed, facing him.

“What do you want to talk about?” he asked from the doorway.

She twiddled her fingers in her lap as she spoke. “Well, I had an appointment today with my therapist. We went over several things, and I arranged to see her every week.”

“That’s great, baby,” he said as he took a step in her direction.

Putting her hand up to stop him, she continued, “She thought it was best that you come along to some of them.”

“Ok, I can do that, Skylar. I don’t have a problem with that.” He frowned, looking at her hands in her lap, and then around the room until his eyes landed on her engagement ring sitting there.

“What else is going on, Skylar. Why aren’t you wearing the ring I gave you?”

Standing up, she picked up the ring, moved, and stood in front of him, lifting his hand up and placing the ring on his palm. “I think it is best we don’t get married, Nate.”

“Why?” He whispered.

She wrapped her hand around his, the one holding the ring. “I need time to figure myself out, Nate. I need to get over the past and what happened, and move on.”

He stepped even closer to her. “We can do that together, Skylar.”

“No, we can’t. I need to do it myself, and I can’t have you around me right now.”

“Skylar,” he groaned.

“Please, Nate. I can’t do this with you anymore with everything that has happened, and also with what you did to me. I couldn’t handle it if you did it again, and I know you will. I love you, but I can’t keep doing this,” she sobbed out.

Nate tried to wrap his arms around her, but she moved out of his reach. “Please don’t Nate.”

“Skylar, I swear to you, nothing like that will ever happen again.”

“You can’t make a promise you can’t keep, Nate. I will let you know about everything regarding our child, but I think it is best we don’t see each other anymore.”

Stepping around him, she started towards her door, but Nate wrapped his arms around her from behind. “Skylar, I’m not going anywhere. You can argue all you want, even hit me if you want to, but I’m staying here with you,” he whispered into her ear.

Skylar pulled herself away from him. “No, you’re not. I said that it was over, so you’re leaving.”

“Baby, you don’t mean what you said?”

“Yes, I do. We are ended, Nate. I can’t do what we have between us anymore. You have hurt me too many times, and I can’t deal with that. I can’t figure out why you have done the things you have, but I don’t want to know. It has been done, and for the last time. We are good together when we are in bed, but that is it. We both need to move on from each other.”

He raked his hand over his face. “Skylar, I’m so sorry for what I have done and said to you, but I don’t want to move on. I want you and only you. I can’t think of anyone else, you are the only one on my mind, 24/7.”

“It doesn’t matter anymore, Nate. If we stay together, and you’re not around, the first thing I’m going to think is who are you with and what you are doing with them. The trust I had for you is gone. I can’t just trust you that easy again. What’s done is done.”

“It does matter, Sky. I love you. Isn’t that enough reason to stay together and prove to you that it will never happen again?”

“Love is love, Nate. Not trust. A relationship needs trust in it, and ours doesn’t have that.” She shook her head. “You need to leave,” she whispered the last part.

“This isn’t over yet, Sky. I will accept your wish that you want me gone, but I will still be around. You are mine, not anyone else’s, and I will prove to you that nothing in the past will ever, in this life, happen again.”

She turned away from him as he approached. She wanted to believe every word he said, but it was so hard to do just that. She felt his lips touch her forehead, but never looked at him. This was the hardest decision she had ever made, ending it with Nate. Now the next part was going to be just as hard, getting over him and moving forward with her life. Her body still wanted him, but her heart thought differently. She was over getting hurt, and now that it was said and done, she needed to go through with what she said and not run back into his arms, disregarding what she had just told him.

She could not face him as she heard him leave out the front door. If she did, she would only end up begging him to stay and never leave her. But this was for the best. She didn’t know whom for, but it was. Laying on her bed and pulling her spare pillow against her chest, she wanted Nate to be lying beside her, to be in his arms, but she had to stop thinking like that. She rubbed her hand over her belly. “Your daddy is still going to be around, but he won’t be with mummy anymore, sweetheart.” She sobbed.

It was going to be hard to watch him with someone else, but this was her choice, not his. Maybe it was best if they saw the same therapist, separately. She could still work with them like that, right? Being in the same room with him, talking about everything that has happened would kill her. She didn’t want to hear how he felt when he had done certain things, or what thoughts were going through his head. Seeing it was enough for her, she did not need to hear how or what had happened.

Pushing all thought aside of him, she knew she needed to rest, to calm herself down and work out what was going to happen next.

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W
alking through her door, Chantal went straight into her bathroom and got into the shower. She needed to scrub herself clean, not in a bad way, of sorts, but to remove all signs that she had spent the last hour with Dom. She was angry with herself that she dropped her barriers for one more romp with him.
This was the last time, no more!
She kept telling herself, but she had wanted him for so long, and he was so worth the wait.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t him that had come to her. Joey had arranged everything. She was pissed when Joey had told her why Dom was there that night. She was ecstatic when she found him in her room, and then in her bed. But finding out that he only because someone asked him to be there, not on his own accord, was hurtful in her opinion.

She wanted him to be there with her for
himself
, not because someone had asked him to help fulfil her fantasy. She wanted everything he could possible give her, but he held back, she knew he did. She still could not figure out why he was doing that.

“Chantal.”

Joey was going to know where she had been, and with whom. She couldn’t tell him, it would hurt to voice that. She wanted to be with Joey. He was caring, thoughtful, sweet, strong-willed—the list goes on. And then there was Dom—sweet one minute, an asshole the next. Hot as hell, his body language said one thing, but what he actually said was the complete opposite. She couldn’t keep up with the back and forth from him.

The door to the shower opened, and Joey slid in. Trying her best, she smiled up at him. “Hey,” she whispered.

“Baby, you’ve been crying.”

And that is what sent her into the next round of tears over the one man that she wanted the most.

Wrapping her arms around his waist, she cried into his chest. How could she do this to Joey? He was the best thing for her, but her heart wanted another.

“Tell me what has you so upset,” he whispered against her ear.

“Dom,” she hiccupped.

“What has he done?” he asked as he stroked her back.

“You’re going to hate me.”

“I would never hate you, Chantal. You’re too sweet for that to happen.”

She just shook her head, and then confessed, “I slept with Dom.”

Moving back from her, he lifted her chin up with a finger, “Chantal, I know you have been in love with Dom for years now. Although, I would love nothing more than for you to be with me, I know Dom holds your heart. No one will ever fill that spot meant for him.”

“What I did was wrong, Joey.”

“No, it wasn’t. You did what your heart and body wanted. What we have is nothing compared to what you and Dom will have.” He smiled down at her.

“He doesn’t want me, other than for sex.”

He gripped her shoulders. “Let him work that out for himself. He does want you, for much more, but he needs to figure that out. If he doesn’t, I’m always here for you.”

“I love you, Joey. I wish my feelings were different, but I can’t stop it from happening.”

“I know, Chantal. And I love you, too. What the heart wants the heart gets. Just remember, I’m here for you, for anything, even if it’s just sex between us,” he said wiggling his eyebrows.

She could not help but laugh. “Thank you for understanding, I’m so glad I have someone like you.” She hugged him tighter.

“I knew this was never going to be more between us, no matter how hard I dreamed that it would happen.”

She placed her hand against his cheek, as he closed his eyes and leaned further into her touch. “You will find that special someone that will want you for who you are, and what is in your heart, Joey. You have a lot of love there to give to the right person.”

“Likewise for you, too, Chantal. Just hope he realises it soon, or he will lose a precious thing.”

Nodding, she couldn’t answer that one. No one had ever called her something precious.

Turning her around and reaching for the soap, he started washing her. “Anyways, there’s a party on tonight. You interested in going with me?”

“What kind of party is it?” she groaned. The way he worked her neck was a miracle. All the tension that had built up over the last week was slowly going.

“Probably some kind of kink party,” he laughed out.

She did not mind
some
kink, but the hard-core stuff was way out of her league.

Facing him, she began washing him. “What should I wear to something like that?” Her hands slid over his chest, circling his nipples. She giggled when he moaned. Her hands moved further down his body, and traced his growing erection.

“Something sexy would be fine,” he groaned.

“Like how sexy?”

Gripping his hardness in her hand, she moved it up and down, slowly.

“You’re asking me now, while you’re stroking me? I can’t think when you’re doing that, baby.”

Leaning forwarding, she licked around his nipple. “I’ll just pick something out, and you tell me what you think, then.”

“Thank God. The only thing I want to hear now is you screaming my name.”

Joey lifted her and she wrapped her legs around his waist, feeling him nudge her opening. “Let’s see who will come first,” she teased, as he slid inside of her.

“Is that a challenge?”

Nodding, she gripped him as hard as she could, loving the noises he was making. She knew she was going to be the first to come, and would many more times after that, before he finally did.