Sweet Little Thing: A Novella (Sweet Thing)

BOOK: Sweet Little Thing: A Novella (Sweet Thing)
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Sweet Little Thing

Copyright © 2014 by Renée Carlino

 

Cover design: Sarah Hansen of Okay Creations

Cover Images: Chris Wodjak Photography

Cover design concept: Zoe Norvell

 

e-book and paperback formatting by Angela Mclaurin of Fictional Formats

 

Edited by Anne Victory of Victory Editing

 

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

 

All rights reserved. Except as permitted under the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system without prior written permission of the publisher.

TRACK 1: Wedding Pains

TRACK 2: The Creation Process

TRACK 3: The Fuckin’ Hollies

TRACK 4: Bros before Hos

TRACK 5: Breathe

TRACK 6: Dresses and Dry Toast

TRACK 7: Wedding Bands

TRACK 8: Full Bellies, Full Hearts

TRACK 9: Cigarettes and Baby Bottles

TRACK 10: The Way It Is

TRACK 11: One Last Hoorah

Three years later . . .

Letter to Readers

Excerpt from Nowhere But Here

Acknowledgments

 

 

 

 

 

 

For the readers, the lovers, and the dreamers.

 

 

 

“T
yler is getting ordained online as we speak,” I said to Mia as I watched her anxiously thumb through a bridal magazine. She was sitting in the window ledge of our Brooklyn loft, wearing an oversized wool sweater and bright purple leggings. Her hair was knotted up on the top of her head in a messy bun. I was sitting at the breakfast bar across the room, slurping up a bowl of cereal.

“Tyler is going to marry us?”

“Yeah, why not? Who better than my best friend?”

“I can think of a few people, like Martha or Sheil.”

“Tyler will be perfect!”

She stared me down for several seconds and then very subtly shook her head.

I wouldn’t go as far as to say that Mia was getting cold feet about marrying me, but she definitely wasn’t into planning the wedding. We’d decided the day Mia moved to Brooklyn that we wouldn’t waste another minute. We would head down to the courthouse, pick up a witness off the street, get hitched, and call it a day. That was until Jenny caught wind of our little plan, God love her. I say that with the utmost love, respect, and pure sarcasm. Jenny threw a wrench in the whole freakin’ plan. As soon as she’d found out, she’d immediately called Mia’s mom and blabbered everything to her. Jenny was like that. A good friend, but man, once in a while she overstepped the boundaries.

Of course Mia’s mom put a guilt trip on both of us. I can’t tell you how many times I heard her over the speakerphone: “But you’re my only child, Mia, and I’m not invited to your wedding?” Liz could be melodramatic at times, even though she was a pretty grounded human being in general. It wasn’t that we didn’t want her at our wedding, it was that we didn’t feel we needed a wedding to begin with. And it wasn’t Mia who eventually gave in—no, my little firecracker stuck to her guns. I’m the wuss who rolled over.

All Mia’s step-dad had to say to me was, “Gee, Will, I sure hope your future daughters let you walk them down the aisle.” Aw, man, that went straight to my gut. I got gut punched by a hypothetical situation. Who knew if we would even have a daughter, much less one who didn’t want me to walk her down the aisle? Yet that’s all it took; just the mere thought of not being present at my future kid’s wedding was enough for me to call off the instant nuptials.

Mia was mad at me for a week until we had really great make-up sex, and then she got over it. That’s when the bridal magazines starting popping up everywhere. I’m pretty sure that was Jenny’s sneaky little touch, but even with all the wedding propaganda flashing in front of Mia’s face, I could tell she wasn’t buying into it.

Sitting on the ledge and staring out the window, she said, “What does your dream wedding look like, Will?”

I looked up to the ceiling and scratched my chin. I knew I could say something really romantic in that moment, but I loved messing with Mia. “Hmm?” I waited for her to finally turn her head and look at me. “Remember the video for ‘November Rain’? Guns N’ Roses?” I wiggled my eyebrows at her.

She scrunched up her nose and squinted but then burst into a fit of laughter. She laughed so hard she fell off the ledge and cried and then made a hilarious attempt at speaking. “Your dream, bahahaha. Your dream is to marry a six-foot-tall supermodel while you sit at a piano wearing a bandana?” She tried to catch her breath and then her eyes shot open even wider. “You know that dream doesn’t end well? Doesn’t the bride die?” Her voice got really high.

I managed to remain deadpan even though I wanted to laugh and roll around on the ground with her. Instead, I pretended she’d hurt my feelings. “We could probably get Slash to shred on his guitar in the dusty wind outside the church,” I said, looking doe-eyed at her.

Her face went completely blank as she lay on the ground staring up at me. “You are not serious. Since when were you such a butt-rocker? Did you like that hair-band shit?”

“I’m older than you, Mia. That was kind of my time.”

“Please tell me you didn’t have bangs.”

I stalked over to the old upright and began playing “November Rain.” I belted out the lines in my best scratchy-voiced, Axl Rose impression.

Mia crept up behind me and wrapped her arms around my waist, pressing her cheek to my back. “Please stop, honey, please?”

I plopped down on the piano bench and turned, pulling her onto my lap. I kissed her shoulder and then her neck. She shivered.

“It doesn’t matter to me what our wedding looks like as long as you’re there.”

“Wearing white?”

Between kisses, I said, “You can wear whatever you want. You can wear a trash bag for all I care. I’ll still want to marry you and kiss you like this for the rest of my life.”

She cupped my face. “Wilbur, you are so sexy when you’re not pretending to be an eighties butt-rocker.”

“You know what’s not sexy?”

“What?” she said on a breath between laying kisses on my cheek.

“June pooping on the floor.”

Mia jumped off my lap and darted over to the kitchen, screeching in her highest voice. “No, no, no, Juney.” She caught our little puppy mid-poop and picked her up, held her arms out and screamed, “What do I do?”

There was no way Mia would be able to get June outside without leaving a trail of poop in her wake. “Put her over the toilet!”

I followed her as she ran down the hallway and into our tiny bathroom at the end. She held the squirming puppy over the toilet until the doggie business was complete.

Setting June on the ground, she glanced up at me, frowned, and then mumbled, “I’m gonna be a terrible mother.”

I helped her up and then stood behind her at the sink as she washed her hands. “No, you’re going to be perfect.” I smirked when she looked at me in the mirror. “You did exactly the right thing. First you screamed and charged at her with your arms flailing around, and then you basically held her by the neck while you ran around in a circle yelling. That is exactly what you will probably do if the same situation happens to play out with one of our babies.”

“Thanks a lot.”

“I’m kidding.” I pinched her butt.

“Ouch, jerk-face!”

“Baby, look at me.” Once she turned, I continued. “You are good at everything you do. Trust me… everything.” I let my eyes drop to her mouth.

“Oh, stop.” She tried to squirm out of my embrace.

“No, seriously, Mia. You’re gonna be a great mom.” I squeezed her tighter when she huffed into my chest. “I have to get down to the studio; that tool, Chad, and his people scheduled a jam session. Whatever the fuck that means when you don’t play any instruments.”

“I’ll be down in a little bit,” she said. “Hey, why do you think they came to us? Chad and his people?” She held up air quotes when she said the word “people.” “It doesn’t really seem like a good fit.”

“You’re right, but the record label said we’ll basically write all his songs, play every instrument on the album, and then pretty boy can sit at the front of the stage playing air guitar and pretending he’s a musician. It’s Milli Vanilli shit.”

“What label?” she asked.

“Live Wire.”

She sucked in a breath. Live Wire was the label that had basically tried to make me their monkey back when I was looking for a record deal. I’d signed with them but hadn’t been able to deliver the bubblegum-pop shit they wanted. When I tried to get out of the contract, they sued me. Luckily, Frank had scrutinized the deal so carefully he was able to find a mistake on their end, which basically revoked the entire deal. I’d gone on and opened Alchemy Sound Studios, but remained cautious when it came to working with the labels.

“You’re not going to let them take credit for your songs, are you?”

“Our songs, and of course not. Frank is handling the contract on this one because they came to me with no material. A good-looking kid with a decent voice who’s willing to do anything comes along and bam, record deal, no songs required. He doesn’t care if the label makes him sing ‘You’re My Fucking Sunshine,’ all he cares about is screaming girls. We’ll get writing and producing credits on it, and we’ll get paid well. Frank will work it out so we don’t get screwed. I promise, baby.”

Frank Abedo was the talent agent who’d gotten me signed with Live Wire. He believed in me and thought I had a rare talent. He genuinely wanted the business to be about the music, so he’d understood when I’d wanted to get out of my contract. After I opened Alchemy Sound Studios, he stuck around, even though there was nothing in it for him. He brought a lot of talent my way, and he was well-versed when it came to contracts, so he was definitely an asset for our team.

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