Surrender to Me (20 page)

“You plan to keep me tied up until I give in?” Her pussy clenched at the thought.

“Nope. I want to make defiance unpleasant, but I don’t get off on forcing a woman to do anything. Once the punishment is over, I’ll release you. But since this all started with your refusal to cooperate, you can end it now by—”

“You mean my refusal to roll over and play dead?” she snapped.

Granted, she wasn’t making a strong case for that orgasm she craved, but his I’m-all-big-and-bad routine, along with his mastery of her body, scared the crap out of her. This power-trip, steamroller shit was beginning to remind her too much of Gordon. If she gave an inch now, Hunter would take a hundred miles later.

“I want a submissive woman, not a well-trained dog. And my attempt to go slow and put you at ease is getting us nowhere.”

“Get the hell o—oh!”

He drowned out her protest by laving her nipple with his tongue in a teasing glide, prodding the hard bud with his thumb. His nip was an electric jolt of pain, teeth to burning flesh, followed by a soothing lick. He paid similar homage to her other breast until both nipples felt swollen, alive with need. Kata wanted to hold out, throw his seduction back in his face . . . but she ended up arching to his mouth with another silent plea.

Hunter slid down her body, his lips gliding across the sensitive undersides of her breasts, caressing over her rib cage. His tongue dipped into her navel, swirling around as his humongous hands gripped her hips in a way she could only describe as possessive.

Kata swallowed. This “punishment” she’d supposedly earned felt more like Hunter wanting to overwhelm her senses to prove that he could command her at will.

Fear jolted her. “Why are you doing this to me?”

He froze, raised his laser-precise gaze to her. “What is it you think I’m doing?”

“Trying to show me that you’re the man and can bend the little lady to your will, no matter how much you have to trample my independence or self-esteem. You may make me beg for an orgasm because, God knows, you’ve figured out exactly how to put my body in the palm of your hand. But in doing so, you’re trying to steal my soul. And you can kiss my ass. I’m not giving it to you.”

His brows shot up. He looked affronted, then considering. Finally, concern settled into the sharp angles of his face. “Honey, you’re still not getting it. I’m not doing this
to
you. I’m doing it
for us
. We can’t really be together until you’re honest with me and with yourself. Your body craves domination, takes to it like surrender is the most natural thing in the world. It’s your head getting in the way. God knows, I’ve made myself clear enough that I want to be the man who grants all your fantasies for the rest of your life. But you persist in thinking that I’m trying to belittle you and break you down, rather than build us up. You couldn’t be more wrong. Explain.”

He punctuated his demand by nuzzling his lips across her low belly, then followed with another nip of teeth . . . at the same moment he brushed his fingertips across her clit. The combination of pleasure and pain was nothing short of hypnotic, cajoling.

Panic, anger, and fear collided, compounded by this dangerous arousal. Regardless of his little speech, Kata felt overtaken. Hunter had nearly crushed her free will by hurtling her to the very edge of desire again and again. She bucked, trying to dislodge him. He wasn’t moving an inch.

Really, she should refuse to bend, keep him in the dark. Except that he was relentless enough to keep her manacled to this bed until she told him everything. If he wanted the shitload of 411, that was his stupid mistake.

“I’ll tell you why. Did I ever mention that my mother isn’t allowed to choose her own clothing every day? Gordon insists on doing it for her.”

Hunter’s brows shot up, and he shrugged. “If they’re a Dominant/ submissive couple, that’s not uncommon. I don’t want a twenty-four/ seven slave like that, but some Doms—”

“I don’t know if he’s a Dom. Even if he is, the real problem is that he’s an asshole. Every day for the past dozen years he’s been telling my mother that she could look better. He started by picking her jewelry, because, according to him, he has an innate talent for such things, which she lacked. Then he started choosing her shoes, then shirts, skirts, pants. Now she doesn’t wear a stitch without consulting him because he’s convinced her that she’s a train wreck without him.”

Even in shadow, she saw the concern deepen on Hunter’s face. “Kata, I—”

“No!” How
dare
he suffer remorse now for pushing her to talk. He wanted this Pandora’s box opened, so he’d better deal. “That was just the beginning. He cut her off from all her friends, scheduling conflicting events, inventing ‘crises’ whenever she had plans to go out. Soon, even the friends who’d stood by her after my dad died, fell by the wayside. So Gordon convinced her that he was a better friend than all of them put together. She’d had a great career as an OR nurse, but five years ago, she and the surgeon lost a little boy on the operating table. My mom was crushed. You know what Gordon said? Maybe she wasn’t as talented as she’d thought, and that everyone would be better served if she stayed home. She fucking loved that job. Poof, it was gone. He’s made her too afraid to pursue getting another. Her driver’s license expired, and he’s been dragging his feet for two years to take her to have it renewed.”

“You’re right; he is an asshole,” he said softly.

Kata paused, stared at him in the dark. It wasn’t a line. He sincerely meant that. Somehow, all the jumble of anger, panic, and desire that had been biting her morphed into grief. Tears stung her eyes.

“Gordon calls
all
the shots. Since about the time I began driving, Mom hasn’t been the same woman I grew up with. She’s afraid to
breathe
without precious Gordon’s permission. She’s a . . . shell. Then three years a-ago . . .”

Hot tears rolled down Kata’s face. She tried to wipe them away, then realized the manacles made that impossible. Helplessness and impotent anger infuriated her all over again. God, what her mother must go through . . .

Kata paused, unable to relive the horror of the night everything had spiraled down the proverbial toilet of life. Hunter had only wanted her to vomit up the painful past so that he could unravel her. But she was already there, feeling a hairsbreadth away from giving in to something that could destroy her.

Granted, Hunter hadn’t belittled her. She prayed he would see why the amount of control he wanted to exert over her life scared the hell out of her and stop trying to make her surrender her soul.

“Three years ago . . .?” he prompted, wiping her tears away.

Kata slammed her eyes shut. As she pictured how that sentence ended, a sob buckled her chest with the horror her family lived with each and every day. The pity, the pain. No way she was sharing that so Hunter could rip her wide-open and make her even more vulnerable to him.

“Stop! God knows that, all trussed up like this, you can do whatever the hell you want with me, and I can’t stop you. You’ll probably even make me like it, but I—I’m done talking.”

“Okay. Shh.” Hunter kissed her forehead, caressed her cheek. “Thank you for sharing your mother’s situation with me. I appreciate the courage and trust that required.” His voice, surprisingly tender, soothed her. “I understand better, I think. You’re afraid that my wanting to control you in bed will spill to the rest of your life. Before me, you’d never spent ten minutes with a Dom. Clearly, you’ve been through a lot with Gordon. Your fear is fair.”

Of all the things he might have said, that surprised her most. And incited more tears. “You’re not bullshitting me?”

“No. We married quickly, and you don’t know me well yet. From your perspective, I took advantage of a drunk woman by hustling you to the altar, spent the night with you, and chased you to your hometown when you wanted space. When danger came your way, I ordered you not to return to work, which I’m guessing felt a lot like something Gordon would demand.” He cocked his head in thought. “Then I suppose you think I dragged you to Dallas, away from your family and friends, so I could isolate you. I got in your panties and your head until you gave me the information I needed so I could somehow use it against you. Do I have it right?”

Her eyes watered over again. She wanted to believe it was nothing more than exhaustion and a decided lack of the orgasm she’d so desperately craved. Or that her damn eyes leaked because she’d dredged up so much stuff about her mom that she usually shoved way down. But mostly, it was Hunter. He was so insightful, actually able to see the situation from a point of view other than his own.

Wow.
She wasn’t used to that.

“Right now, you don’t seem like the kind of dickhead who makes himself feel better by making others feel worse.” She sniffed, paused, still thinking through her reply. He was trying hard to be fair; she needed to do the same. “I know that, though stupid and drunken, getting married was my idea. I have no doubt after having a bullet whiz a quarter inch from my face that the danger I’m in is real. I’d escaped him, yeah.” It pained her to admit this. “He would probably have found me again pretty quickly. I know you alpha males can’t fathom not protecting your woman or whatever. I admit that I don’t know the first thing about hiding from an assassin.”

“But?”

Damn if the concern in his prompt didn’t start the tears again. “I don’t think I can deal with you always trying to get in my head. Fun, casual,
normal
sex—yes. But what you want . . .”

“The intense bond of people who fuck not just with their bodies for the sake of orgasm, but with their minds and hearts to share the ultimate pleasure? Who give themselves to each other so completely that you and I become an us that’s so solid, nothing can ever shake it? You don’t want that?”

Kata couldn’t look away from his solemn, unwavering stare, half-hidden in the gray shadows. She trembled from head to toe. When he described the relationship he saw, it sounded so beautiful. But so not real. Wasn’t that, like, a Hallmark card or a Lifetime movie? “Not when it starts with you ordering me around. I—I can’t . . .”

“You’re not the kind of woman who runs from herself. I refuse to believe that, rather than face me and your fears, you’d prefer tepid orgasms with someone like Ben, who will never fulfill you or truly earn your love.”

She wasn’t a coward. She already knew she couldn’t go back to Ben. He’d propositioned her three times since she’d breezed into his hotel room—had that been just this morning?—and she hadn’t hesitated to turn him down.

“You can’t tell me you’ve had that sort of relationship with every woman who’s ever submitted to you.”

“You’re right.” He sighed. “You are the first one. The only one.”

Those words touched her, despite the danger they represented. And the goddamn tears just wouldn’t stop. Hunter had broken something open inside her. Even last night she’d wanted what he seemed to be offering, but now that he’d laid it out on the table so totally? She wanted it more. Desperately. Even though it terrified her.

And cue more tears.
Damn it.

“Honey, trust me. I’m not Gordon. When something is bothering you, we’ll talk about it. I want to know how you feel and what’s on your mind.” He sighed and swept the hair back from her face with gentle palms. “Too many Doms want some sweet little sub who won’t give them any challenge. I could pick up the phone now and call any one of the dozens of such subs I know. But your submission is only as good as my dominance. It’s your vitality and your passion I want, and your full life contributes to those. Under normal circumstances, I would never interfere with your job or your friends. If I ever behave like Gordon, you have my permission to string me up by the balls. I want to master your body, not put a lockdown on your life.”

Really?

Kata bit her lip as she stared up into his hard male face, his eyes so blue in the semidarkness. He met her, moment for moment, not blinking. Not rushing her. His words bounced around in her head.

Hunter had spelled out the situation perfectly. Now she had to decide: return to her casual lovers and sex with them that meant nothing, or submit?

Chapter Ten

“
A
LL right.” Releasing a harsh breath, Kata sent him a jerky nod. “If you don’t overwhelm me too much, I’ll try to submit to you.”

He smiled. “Not to sound too much like Yoda, but ‘do or do not; there is no try.’”

Yeah, Hunter was an all or nothing guy. And so far, she’d done everything halfway. If she wanted this, wanted to find out if he was really going to fill that empty, aching need in her that had never been quite satisfied, she was going to have to cooperate. Hunter couldn’t give her that elusive, ultimate satisfaction if she didn’t let him.

“Okay.” She swallowed. “I’ll do it.”

Satisfaction settled into his stark features. “Thank you.”

That look suffused her with pleasure. Normally, she wouldn’t give a shit what any guy thought. Gordon had rearranged her wiring so that she didn’t go out of her way to please any male. For some reason, Hunter was different. Yes, he was often pushy and unyielding, which sometimes translated to teeth-gritting annoyance. But he didn’t appear to command her simply for the sake of pumping up whatever chest-thumping, knuckle-dragging caveman lived inside him. He had a purpose. And if she wanted more of his smiles, affection, and sugary-perfect touch—and that orgasm he’d been withholding—she was going to have to rein in her temper.

He brushed her cheek with a tender caress, settled his mouth over hers. Her thoughts scattered. His kiss drifted over her lips, softer than a whisper but with more impact than a sledgehammer. She drew in a shaky breath. An ache bled through her chest, until her nipples peaked again. This feeling went beyond a mere craving for his touch to an insane desire to be meaningful to him. It speared her heart, the terrifying yearning for all of him to merge with all of her.

Because she wanted it so badly, Kata realized that Hunter was holding himself back.