Sugar Rush (17 page)

My mouth falls open. I think briefly about continuing to argue, but then I take in the serious look in his eyes that's part exasperation but mostly devotion to me sprinkled with a little bit of excitement to show his care for me in this way.

All of the anger and embarrassment over my paltry gift evaporates and I smile sheepishly as I toss the box and key to the coffee table, and then crawl onto his lap. Looping my arms around his neck, I press a kiss to his stubbled cheek and then pull back to look into his eyes. “Thank you. It's an amazingly extravagant gift, and I'm sorry for my reaction. This will take a little bit of getting used to.”

“I intend to spoil you, Sela,” he murmurs. “I want to give you the world.”

Smiling, I turn my body, pull my arms from around his neck, and curl into him. Resting my head on his shoulder and my palm over his heart, I say, “All I ever wanted was a quiet life. I always thought I'd be alone because of what happened to me. I never thought there was room in my life for anything other than my anger and misery. But now that's all changed. You've already given me the world.”

His lips press onto the top of my head and his arms wrap around me. “Paint a picture for me. What does your world look like with me in it? Tell me where we'll be in, say, a year from now.”

“Hmm,” I hum low in my throat as I consider his question. “In a small house that sits by the ocean. Maybe a fixer-upper with old linoleum floors we'll want to rip out but they're so charming we leave in, and whitewashed cabinets. We'll have a dog, maybe two, that we can take for walks on the beach. I'll work as a counselor and you'll do programming magic, and when we come home from work, we'll fix dinner together.”

“Sounds nice,” he says in a low voice as one of his hands strokes my arm.

“And we'll fuck every night, and twice a day on the weekends. We'll listen to bands in dive bars or we'll try out various coffee shops in search of the perfect Viennese cup. Oh, and we'll develop some type of hobby…like maybe collecting antiques or something. You know, so we don't get so wrapped up in sex that we never leave the house for very long.”

Beck chuckles and squeezes me tight, but then he turns serious. “Do you want kids?”

“I don't know,” I answer quickly and honestly, but it's a thought that has plagued me before. “I mean…I never thought I'd have a real relationship before, or that I'd even be living with someone and discussing a beach house and dogs. But yeah…I like kids. I think I'd be a good mom. I had a great role model, after all.”

“Well, I had a crappy role model for a mother,” Beck says, not in a bitter way, but more reflective.

“You'd make an amazing father,” I say softly. “You're so good with Ally.”

“Yeah,” he says softly. “I think I would too.”

We both fall silent, maybe unsure of what to say after that revelation. I mean, not an hour ago we were declaring our love for the first time, and now we're discussing houses and children. It's too fast and it's overwhelming, and yet it's also a little bit right too. I know this because the ensuing silence as we contemplate this isn't awkward at all.

“So, when this is all over with JT, next on our agenda is to find a small house on a beach somewhere?”

I giggle. “With peeling linoleum floors.”

“Got it,” Beck says.

Suddenly, I sit up and turn in his lap to look at him, reality seeping back in to our discussion of happily-ever-after dreams. “What if this doesn't work? So many things could go wrong. VanZant may not take the offer, then we'd depend on fate for him to lose. Or he could go to the police and tell him about the bribery—”

“We're shielded from that,” Beck reminds me quickly. “Dennis said there won't be any ties to us. It's why we're paying him so much.”

I disregard those assurances, because here's the really big “if.” “We still have to depend on JT coming to you for the money.”

“Well, he can only go to me or my dad,” Beck points out. He relayed to me the entire conversation he had with his dad on the drive home last night, and it does seem his dad is on board with us. “JT doesn't have any other close friends with this type of liquid cash to help him out and no bank will loan him money to pay off a debt. Dennis assured me the collection deadline will be short so he'll be under pressure to act fast.”

“Maybe JT won't agree to give up the company for your loan,” I offer, even though we've hashed this all out before. “Maybe he'll opt for a beating. Or take his chances elsewhere. Or even negotiate an extension.”

“Then worst-case scenario, he's still part of the company when we go to the police,” Beck says firmly. I know he's frustrated over my continued worries, but he's also very patient with me.

“It will kill The Sugar Bowl.” The bitterness is evident in my voice. “It could ruin you. Maybe we shouldn't even do this at all.”

“What?” Beck exclaims, his eyebrows rising high. “You want me to just stay with JT as a partner and pretend none of this happened?”

“No,” I say sullenly, my gaze dropping from his. I twist my fingers together and mutter. “I know you could never do that.”

“Sela,” Beck says softly, his fingers tilting my chin up. When my eyes lock on his, he gives me a knowing smile. “I'm not going to lie…I've got a lot tied up in this business. I'm proud of it. It's lucrative. But it is not my only idea. My entire self-worth isn't dependent on it. My financial stability most certainly isn't, as I've invested well and I could buy us houses on multiple beaches and we'd never have to work again a day in our lives. Worst fucking case, I can't get JT out and the police won't compel him for DNA and he stays free. If that happens, then we'll move to a faraway beach and start all over again.”

Tears suddenly fill my eyes as quickly as the blossoming love in my heart starts to overwhelm me. This man…that he would do that for me?

Beck tilts his head to the side, his smile turning softer, and he wipes a stray tear that runs down my cheek. “I fell hard for you, Sela. I'm committed to
you
and
our
future.”

“So this is love?” I whisper hoarsely as I stare into his beautiful eyes.

“I do believe it is,” he tells me with a grin. “Now…would you like to go see your new car, Miss Halstead?”

I can't help it. His attitude is infectious, and I grin back at him before backing off his lap and dropping to my knees before him. Placing one palm on each knee, I nudge his legs apart. “Why Mr. North, I would love to, but first I really would love to suck your cock.”

“Christ,” Beck mutters as his head drops back onto the cushion of the couch and he sighs with happiness. “If you must.”

“Oh, I must.”

“I'm really sorry JT couldn't make this meeting,” I say as I shake hands first with Michael Gruber, then with Vincent Carmon, the two owners of ET Technologies.

“No problem,” Vincent responds with an affable smile. He's the younger of the two entrepreneurs, having recently turned twenty-two. Michael's not much older at twenty-three.

“We really wanted your eyes on this project anyway,” Michael adds. “We just don't have your programming skills.”

It's true enough. They would need me on this project, and I'm very much interested. ET Technologies was founded by Michael and Vincent, college buddies who dreamed up the potential to analyze facial expressions of consumers reacting to certain products. The “ET” part of their name actually stands for eye twitch, a comical play on a common facial expression to indicate unease.

JT had hit me up several weeks ago about this company, as they were looking for not only start-up capital but help with the coding and programming. They approached Townsend-North, and after analyzing their proposal, we finally had been able to set up this meeting. Of course, JT was supposed to be here, but he was a no-show, and this is both a relief and a worry.

I worry because the Mariota-VanZant fight is in five days and our plan is in full swing. VanZant accepted the payoff to take a dive, and according to Dennis, wasn't plagued by any doubt over his decision. Seems he's been nursing a rotator cuff injury that has been kept in absolute secrecy so as not to disturb the odds, and had doubts about being able to take down Mariota anyway. This offer was opportune, as it gives him financial stability and he can later reveal the injury that may help explain the loss and give him a future shot at a big title fight.

So because the plan has been officially enacted, and we are one step closer to stringing up JT by his balls, I don't want anything to fuck this up. JT normally isn't one to miss business meetings unless he's partying hard. And thus is my worry…that perhaps he's gone on a bender, which leaves him unpredictable. I can just see the fucker getting a wild hair up his ass and deciding to change his bet over to Mariota or something.

But I've got more important things to pay attention to at the moment.

“Like I said,” I tell both men as I walk them out of my office, which is where we had been meeting for their formal pitch to Townsend-North. “I'm very interested in the project. I'd like a few weeks to go over all of the materials and talk to JT about it, but I think we can do something for you.”

Both men's eyes light up, as they can start to see their hard work and amazing ideas have a fighting chance in the competitive world of tech industry. What they don't know is that I have no intention of discussing this with JT. My hope is that by this time next week, he's going to be begging me for money and quickly on his way out of my life. Then I fully intend to work with these two men—both geniuses really—and help them bring this advanced technology to life.

Linda stands from her desk as we emerge from my office. We exchange brief farewell formalities and she walks them back up to the lobby for me. Now that the only meeting I had scheduled for the day is over, I have another appointment outside of the office. It's more important than this meeting I just had, will take much longer, but the results will be worth it. Looking at my watch, I see I have just enough time to check my emails before I have to leave, and also put in a call to Dennis. I want to know if he knows what JT is up to. He might still be watching him for all I know, and I don't have time to figure out what my partner is up to this week. I would just like some assurances that he's not going off the deep end before we can attempt to get him out of The Sugar Bowl.

It's later than I had hoped when I get to the condo. I'd sent Sela a text to go ahead and eat without me since my appointment ran over, but it couldn't be helped.

After closing the door behind me and setting my keys on the foyer table, I call out, “Sela?”

“Back here,” I hear from our bedroom.

Smiling, I make my way to her, eager to reveal the results of my appointment today. When I step into our bedroom, I'm momentarily stunned when I see a blond woman standing there, facing me with a tentative smile on her face. For a second, I think Sela must have a friend visiting, but then I instantly recognize those blue eyes. I immediately recognize that body that belongs to me.

All at once, my soul recognizes its mate.

“Surprise,” she says softly with a flick of her hands to her hair.

It's still long and styled in loose waves, but it's now golden blond with subtle lighter streaks mixed in. It's so different, and yet…it's absolutely Sela.

It's Sela in all of her natural beauty, and I'm dazzled.

I walk to her slowly, my eyes roving over her hair that she obviously had lightened today. After I found out about JT, Sela had told me that she colored her hair dark hoping JT wouldn't recognize her. Back then, I couldn't imagine her as a blonde, since I'd only known her as a brunette, but now that I see it…it's the way she's supposed to be.

“It's not my exact natural shade of blond,” she says softly, her eyes looking at me with undisguised need for approval. “But it's close enough.”

I reach out, take a lock resting over her shoulders, and lift it for closer inspection. Then I slide my eyes to her and say, “I love it. You're stunning.”

“I wanted to get back to being me, you know?”

“And now you are,” I assure her as my arms wrap around her waist to pull her in close.

“Do you like it?”

“I love it, Sela. But your hair could be bright orange and lime green, and I'd love that too on you.”

She laughs, pushing her face into my neck, where she kisses me lightly. I tighten my hold on her, enjoying the security and warmth of nothing more simple than a hug from her right now.

“I have something to show you too,” I tell her.

Sela relaxes her grip on me and tilts her head back to look at me questioningly. I release her and take a step back, my hands going down to the hem of my sweater. I grab it along with the T-shirt I'd been wearing underneath and pull them both up and over my head.

“If this is some ploy to get me in your bed, Mr. North,” she says playfully and with just enough heat in her eyes that I know she likes what she sees, “then all you had to do was ask.”

“I intend to have you in that bed,” I tell her ominously as I drop my clothes to the floor. “But I need to show you something first.”

She tilts her head curiously as I turn away from her, showing her my back. I hear a tiny gasp from her as she whispers, “Oh.”

“I'll need you to peel off the bandage,” I tell her, eager to show her the new tattoo on the back of my right shoulder.

There's no hesitation as her fingers gently tug at the adhesive tape around the edges. “You got the phoenix covered?” she whispers.

“Well, I started the process of getting it covered, but it will take a few sessions. Didn't want you to see it anymore. Couldn't stand the thought of it being on my body. Not after knowing what it means to you.”

I can feel the bandage pull free. She doesn't touch the new artwork, but she must be peering at it closely, because I can feel her breath against my skin. She's silent for a moment as she studies it, and I can't imagine what's going through her mind as she looks at the massive green and black dragon that will eventually obliterate the phoenix. There was no particular significance of that mythical animal other than I thought it looked fierce and protective, which seems to be my underlying motive these days for all my actions. And while it's going to take a few sessions to complete the detail work on the tattoo, it's blurring the phoenix nicely for the time being.

I wait for her to peruse it, because the detail of what has been done is amazing, and I can tell when she finally sees her name by her sharp intake of breath.

The tattoo artist worked mostly on the top of the dragon for this session, while outlining in the rest. Its neck is curved, the head rearing back and mouth open with a stream of red, yellow, and orange fire shooting forth. Within the flames, the artist wrote Sela's name in delicate black script.

She doesn't say anything, so I turn to face her. Her beautiful blue eyes are shimmering with tears and she hastily blinks them clear.

“You like?” I ask with a light smile, wanting to remove the heaviness surrounding us.

“I love it,” she says softly. “But you didn't have to do that. That phoenix on your shoulder meant nothing to me.”

“Maybe not,” I tell her. “But it meant something to me. Something bad, and I wanted it gone.”

Sela's lips curve upward and she presses in closer to me, face still tilted so our eyes don't lose connection. “Don't you find it interesting that both of us went out today in secret and made major changes in our appearance? And we did it in secret because we wanted it to be a surprise to the other person?”

“It just means great minds think alike,” I say with a laugh, my hands going to the bottom of her sweatshirt to pull it up and over her head. Once it clears, I tell her, “Now let's get naked. I want to do dirty things to you.”

“Maybe I want to do dirty things to you,” she counters with a wink, her fingers working at the button and zipper to her jeans, even as she kicks her shoes off.

“That would require me to lay on my back, and can't do that with the fresh tattoo,” I say.

“You could just stand there while I drop to my knees,” she says playfully as she sheds her jeans.

And, oh Christ…the thought of that.

Shaking my head, I give her a chastising look as I take my own jeans off. “I called dibs on being the hander-outer of dirty things.”

“ ‘Hander-outer?' ” she laughs.

“Shut up,” I mutter affectionately. “And lose the bra and panties while you're at it.”

When we're both naked, Sela crawls into the middle of our bed and I follow right behind her, pausing only halfway up her body so I can work her pussy with my tongue. Sela is so responsive to me—has given me her trust—that it never takes me long to bring her to climax if I hit her hard. But now I take my time, swirling my tongue in leisurely strokes against her flesh. I open my ears and hear her breathing get faster and faster. Her moans start out soft but get deeper the closer she gets. When I back off her clit, she groans in frustration and moves her hands to my head, trying in vain to push my mouth onto the exact spot she needs me to lick before she'll come.

I tease her mercilessly, not because I want her to suffer, but because I know it feels good to her. I also want to show her that I love this place on her body so much I'm content to just lie here on this side of forever as long as she's loving what I'm doing to her.

“Let me come,” Sela whispers to me, her hips now gyrating wildly under me. “Please, Beck.”

Smart girl. She knows I can't resist her begging.

Fluttering my tongue over her sensitive clit, I press two fingers deep inside her and curl them upward. Sela's back arches and she cries out, “Yes!” as she explodes against my mouth.

“Mmm,” I hum against her, laving her softly with my tongue as she starts to fall back down to earth. “That was beautiful.”

“Fuck me,” she pants as she raises her head to look down at me blearily. “Now.”

And goddamn…I love that blond hair. It's Sela, but she's different. Softer. More innocent looking, more like her deepest self that remains untouched by the horror she suffered.

I push up, place my hands on Sela's hips, and flip her onto her stomach. I know she wants a hard fucking, because she always does when I drag out her first orgasm. I also know that this position drives her absolutely crazy with lust, so I pull her hips up off the bed, take my cock in hand, and shove it into her without preamble.

“Oh fuck, that's good,” I mutter as Sela grunts out her approval, her back arching once again from the pleasure of my invasion.