Sugar Coated Sins (20 page)

I was in shock the instant I heard
the news.

I’d just killed another human
being, and the fact that it had been self-defense had nothing to do with it.

Chapter 24

“Suzanne, she was trying to kill
you,” Jake said softly as sirens started screaming all around us.
 
“You didn’t have any choice.
 
There was nothing else that you could have
done.”

“I didn’t have to follow her up
there, Jake,” I said as my sobbing began to take over.
 
I was crying so hard I couldn’t breathe.

They took me away in an ambulance
and put me in the hospital.

Shock, they said, but I barely
heard them for twenty-four straight hours.

It almost broke me.

But as I lay there in bed, I began
to realize that Jake had been right.
 
There had been a choice to make, a decision that involved life and
death.

Once I was on that rooftop, I knew
that either I would die that day or Hillary Mast would.

And in the end, I couldn’t continue
to punish myself for the fact that I’d done what I could to save my own life.

Jake came in a little later, and
he was clearly happy to see that I was feeling better.
 
“Welcome back.
 
I was worried about you,” he said as he
stroked a little hair out of my eyes.

“To be honest with you, I was,
too.”

“Are you okay?”

“Jake, how do you deal with
it?
 
You’ve had to shoot people before.”

“It’s never easy, but in the end,
it comes down to a choice,” he said gravely.
 
“Suzanne, I’ll do whatever I can to help you, but it’s something that
you’re going to have to come to terms with by yourself.”

“I understand that.”

“I’m just sorry that I wasn’t
there for you when you needed me,” he said, nearly breaking down himself.
 
“I was off looking for Hilda.”

“Did you ever find her?”

“Yes, she was at a rest stop on
the interstate, trying to figure out what to do next.
 
She was afraid that I was convinced that
she’d killed Benjamin Port, and she wasn’t going to wait around to be arrested.
 
I really blew it, Suzanne.”

“Nonsense.
 
I wouldn’t have known anything myself if I
hadn’t gotten that last photo from Ray.
 
I should have waited for you, but I was afraid of what Hillary might
do.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” he
said softly.

“I wish that I could believe
that.
 
It would make dealing with what
happened afterward so much easier.”

“Give it a chance.
 
In the meantime, you’ve got half the town
waiting outside to see you.
 
The doctor
asked us all to step out, but Grace and your mom are clamoring to get back in.”

“Go get them,” I said, eager to
see them as well.
 
Before Jake got to the
door, I added, “There’s one more thing first.”

“Anything.”

“I’m done, Jake.
 
From now on, I’m leaving law enforcement up
to you.”

“You might feel differently about
it later,” he said softly.
 
“I almost
quit myself every time it happened to me.”

“I don’t think so.
 
Go on.
 
Let them in.”

As Grace and my mother rushed to
my side, I knew that I was finished.
 
Grace had dropped out herself once not that long ago, but this time, I
had a feeling that my exit was permanent.
 
Barring the end of the world occurring or something happening to someone
I loved deeply, I was going to stick to donut making and leave the criminal
investigations to the pros.

I had people all around who loved
me, a husband I adored, and a job that I enjoyed, and I meant to savor every
moment I had left with it all.

I knew that once the shock of what
had happened with Hillary Mast on that rooftop wore off, I could very easily
change my mind at some point in the future, but as far as I was concerned, at
that moment, I was officially retired from the amateur sleuthing business
forever.

SUGAR AND SPICE
DONUTS

These treats are praised by my niece for their sweet
flavors.
 
Whenever she comes to visit,
making these donuts with me is one of the “must do” activities on her list, and
as she’s gotten older, she has grown more and more involved in their creation,
giving us both a fun bonding time together.
 
These donuts are particularly good with some warm mulled cider on a cold
winter day after being outside walking in the fresh snow, but even if it’s July
and the sun is baking, these are still a welcome goodie that is great for
sharing!

Ingredients

Dry

2 1/2 cups flour, unbleached all purpose

2 teaspoons baking powder

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg

1/4 teaspoon ground ginger

1/4 teaspoon ground cloves

1 dash salt

Wet

1/2 cup whole milk

1 cup granulated sugar

4 tablespoons butter, softened

2 eggs, beaten

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/2 vanilla bean, scraped

Canola oil for frying

Topping

1/2 cup granulated sugar

1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg

1/4 teaspoon ground ginger

Directions

Heat the oil first to 375° F.

Then, in a medium-sized mixing bowl, stir the flour, baking powder,
cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, cloves, and salt until it is all thoroughly
incorporated.
 
In another bowl, mix the
whole milk, sugar, butter, eggs, vanilla, and the scraped vanilla bean seeds
together.
 
Mix well and then slowly add
the dry ingredients to the wet until they are combined, being careful not to
overmix, as this could cause denser donuts.

Drop small balls of dough the size of walnuts into the hot
oil for 2 to 3 minutes, then remove them to a cooling rack.
 
While they are still warm, top with the sweet
sugar mix and enjoy!

Yields 15 to 20 donuts.

CHOCOLATE GOODNESS
DONUTS

The two best flavors for donuts around our house lately are
lemon and chocolate.
 
My Significant
Other loves chocolate the most, so I try to work some of these into my donut
rotation!
 
I’ve played with many recipes
over the years for adding chocolate to my batter, but I’m still in search of
that perfect ratio and combination of donut batter and chocolate.
 
I haven’t found it yet, but it’s fun to keep
trying, and besides, even if they aren’t perfect, they’re nearly always good
enough to eat!

Ingredients

Dry

3 to 4 cups flour, unbleached all purpose

1/2 cup baking cocoa

3 teaspoons baking powder

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1/4 teaspoon salt

Wet

2 eggs, beaten

3/4 cup granulated sugar

1/4 cup canola oil

2 tablespoons butter, melted

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/2 vanilla bean, scraped

3/4 cup whole milk

Glaze

2 cups confectioner’s sugar

1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon

2 to 3 tablespoons water

Canola oil for frying

Directions

Beat the eggs together in a large mixing bowl, then
incorporate the sugar, oil, butter, vanilla extract, and vanilla bean until
thoroughly mixed.
 
In a separate bowl,
mix the flour, baking cocoa, baking powder, cinnamon, and salt until thoroughly
combined.
 
Next, slowly add the dry
mixture to the wet, stirring just enough to combine as you alternate between
incorporating the dry mix and the milk.
 
Chill this mixture for 15 to 20 minutes.
 
Next, roll the dough out to 1/2 to 1/4 inch thick on a lightly floured
surface and then, using a donut cutter or a glass, cut out the donut
shapes.
 
Heat the canola oil to 375° F,
and then fry each donut for 2 1/2 to 3 minutes, turning halfway through.
 
Remove from the oil and place them on paper
towels.
 
While they are cooling, mix the
glaze, adding just enough water until the desired consistency is obtained.
 
Ice the donuts, and then serve!

Yields 8 to 10 donuts.

DIPPING Rounds

I fully realize that this might go against every recipe I’ve ever created
for the Donut Mysteries, but sometimes the donut is more of a topping delivery
device than a means to an end.
 
When I
don’t feel like messing with creating my own dough, I reach for a tube of
premade biscuit or breadstick dough from my fridge, and as the oven or oil is
preheating, I focus on the toppings to dip them in when they’re done.

Some popular choices in my household are, in no particular order,
slightly warmed hazelnut spread, chocolate fudge or butterscotch ice cream
toppings, sugary glazes like one of the two listed above, simmered jams and
other sweet fruit glazes, nuts, sprinkles, and anything else we happen to have
on hand.

Bake these treats according to the directions on their packages, and be
ready when they come out of the oven.
 
For an even more donutlike texture, deep fry the dough instead.

I like to set the table like a buffet so each person can customize their
very own treat!

Ingredients

1 canister breadstick or biscuit
dough,

Assorted toppings listed above

Canola oil for frying, if desired
(the amount depends on your pot or fryer)

Instructions

You can bake these different
doughs in the oven (usually at 375° F) or do what I like to do.
 
Add enough oil to your pot to fry the
dough.
 
As it is heating to 375° F, break
open the containers and shape the dough, whether biscuit or bread, into small
rounds a little larger than the size of walnuts.
 
After they’re finished baking or frying, cool
them until they are safe to touch and then distribute them and start dipping!

Yields 12 to 16 small rounds.

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