Stone in the Sky (27 page)

“It's not safe now,” I said. “You can't go.”

But it would never be safe.

“Myfanwy offered me a job up on the Yertina Feray,” Bitty said.

“What? No!” I said smacking her arm. “You can't leave me.”

I didn't want to be abandoned again.

“I'd be back every week. And it's only from here to there, but I'd be traveling,” she said.

“I'll think of something,” I said. But I thought of how Bitty looked envious when others thrived. Wandering was in her blood. She was always the one who hiked the claim when Myfanwy came, leaving for hours at a time. She did not like to do the chores that kept her close to the camp.

“You really want to go,” I said.

“Yes,” Bitty said. “I can leave the next time Myfanwy comes.”

“I don't like you leaving,” I said, holding her hand. “I wish you would stay.”

“I'll be happier on the Yertina Feray,” she said.

She was a grown person who was free to make her own choices, not the little girl who used to follow me around. We hugged tight. It was hard to let go.

We walked arm and arm back to the camp. In my room, I pulled an object from under my bedroll. It was a cuff that I had made for Tournour out of a lock of my hair, the remnants of the clothes I'd worn on my travels since I'd left the Yertina Feray, scraps of leather and rope. There was no indication that it was from me, but I knew he would know where it came from. He would have a part of me with him.

“Will you give this to Tournour if you can?”

“Gladly,” Bitty said, giving me a sly look. “I am so curious about your Loor.”

“He's not my Loor,” I said.

“That's not what I heard,” she said. “That's not what Reza says when you're not around.”

“It's impossible to be with an alien,” I said. “I'm with Reza. Reza's Human.”

“Of course,” Bitty said. “Reza's Human.”

“Humans are meant to be with Humans,” I said.

“Impossible loves have a place in the universe,” she said.

“He's there, and I'm here,” I said.

She let it drop by changing the subject.

“Thank you,” she said. “I'll be your eyes up there.”

It would be good to have a spy on the Yertina Feray; someone that I could trust. Caleb was supposed to be up there cozying up to Brother Blue. Get him scared. Get him soft. Get him trusting. But was he doing it? Sometimes I felt he was simply enjoying himself and all the creature comforts that the Yertina Feray offered while I was down on Quint, working the fields.

I couldn't help it. A part of me was resentful. It wasn't his fault. He was doing what I'd asked him to do, but when I thought of him sharing meals, sharing entertainments, and sitting in the Sunspa with Brother Blue as they both got richer, my heart began to freeze. I began to hate my old friend.

“If you're ever in trouble and you need to go, talk to Thado and find out when the next export of Hern is,” I said to Bitty. “They always fly under the radar, and you can likely get off the station easily with them and then you can find some Human Wanderers.”

She turned to go prepare her things for leaving.

“Wait,” I said, and then unclasped my gold Earth bracelet and put it on her wrist. “To keep me with you.”

We hugged one more time, and then I let her go.

When she left, I stayed until the ship blasted off. I watched it get smaller in the sky. I watched until there was nothing but clouds to see.

 

40

“There is a person from the Department of Extraplanetary Excavation coming to visit Quint,” Reza said as he watered his garden. Reza planted other things on his land. He planted Earth corn. He planted Earth wheat. He planted any seed he could get his hands on to make his land bloom. I could see how delighted he was by the small Earth garden we'd started.

“Is she a Loor?” I asked.

“I think so,” Reza said.

If it was Hendala then that meant something was shifting at Bessen.

“I have to go meet them,” Reza said. “Do business. Tournour is coming.”

My heart leapt. I used to wonder how Caleb could talk about Myfanwy who was so far away and still love her. I wondered about that old Earth saying, that absence made the heart grow fonder. It was both true and untrue. I had not had a moment alone with Tournour for nearly a year, but he occupied my thoughts. It was as though no other conversation mattered.

“Can you get Tournour a message for me?” I said, a bit too eagerly.

I saw a cloud of jealousy pass over Reza's face. We had never talked about Tournour, but I knew that my face could not disguise my feelings for him. Sometimes being with Reza only made me feel worse about the fact that I had this place inside of me that held tender feelings for an alien.

“I can't really,” he said. “I have to keep it strictly business.”

I nodded, biting my tongue. He took a shovel to work out a rock in the ground.

“I'll see what I can do,” he said when it finally loosened.

“When are they coming?” I asked.

“Tomorrow,” he said.

I went into town, covered up as a Wanderer and hidden in the Nurlok's kitchen, to watch the team from Bessen arrive.

I leaned my head against the glass to watch Reza welcome the group that included Brother Blue, Caleb, Tournour, Hendala, and a group of aliens from each of the Five Major Species. I watched as they all greeted each other, and I saw that Tournour was wearing the cuff that I had given him. That made me smile. I watched as Reza said something to Tournour, and Tournour's face changed. For the rest of the walk he seemed distracted. He was looking around. Looking for me.

“I'm here,” I wanted to say. “I'm right here.”

When the meeting was over, Reza rejoined me at the Nurlok eatery. After we got some food, we walked back to his place.

I helped him to water the alin, and then we settled in for the night. He reached into his coat and put a data disc down on the table.

“He's gutted,” Reza said.

I snatched the data plug, put it into Reza's console, and let it play.

“
Hello. This place is cold and, though full, it feels empty without you. I have to keep my tongue in check. I have to say yes to everyone but the one person in the universe I want to say yes to. Forgive this awful galaxy. And know that while I say no with every action, my heart beats Tula, Tula, Tula. Don't respond. Too dangerous. I can only hope that you are thinking of me, too.”

“He's not Human you know,” Reza said coming up behind me and slipping his arms around my waist.

“I know,” I said turning and burying my face into his chest. “I know.”

I vowed that when this was over, I would spend a month only talking to Tournour. I was determined to save up conversations for him.

I would tell him about the sky.

I would tell him about the plants.

I would tell him about the birds.

I would tell him about my heart.

 

41

“What's it like up there?” I asked. I longed for news of the Yertina Feray, and Bitty was my only way of getting it.

“It's strange,” Bitty said. “There's a lot of species pride. A lot of separation. But there are more Imperium people coming. Brother Blue is getting very agitated.”

“That's good,” I said.

“Myfanwy has me pulling records and deleting them,” she said. “The Imperium come and try to get data that we've purged.”

“Something is going on,” I said.

Hendala and her group had been back a few more times. She never spoke to me, but when I did see her, she folded her antennae toward me in acknowledgment.

“Myfanwy is worried about Earth,” Bitty said. “And Caleb says that Brother Blue is stepping up the search for Humans. Caleb is going to go back out and try to find them first.”

It was good to know that Caleb was going out to help. But I doubted that he would have any more luck in warning them then I did.

“They won't trust him,” I said.

“I made him and Siddiqui this,” she said holding up her wrist and shaking the gold Earth bracelet at me.

It was brilliant. The Wanderers would trust someone whom they thought was a Gome.

“He'll lead them here, to you,” she said. “They'll be safe here.”

“To Quint, not to me,” I said.

“The Imperium is auditing Brother Blue,” she said. “He's getting desperate.”

Things were about to change. After carefully trying to control things, it was time for the chaos to start.

It made me anxious to think of her on her own, but then it made me glad to have a family to worry about. For so long I had only worried about myself.

 

42

Perhaps the time had finally come for me to be caught.

In order to escape the Imperium scrutiny he was getting, Brother Blue had decided to move down to Quint.

I hid away at Reza's at first, but it was a chore to evade Brother Blue. I saw him in town and on the road and every smile that he flashed made me miserable. He seemed to enjoy the growing town and the newly arrived Humans. He relished it. Looking in on people. Caring for them. As though he were actually the person that he always said he was—not the person who had lied to Earth, to the Imperium, to the Wanderers, and to the countless dead colonists of Children of Earth.

“Why does he stay down here?” I asked. “Why doesn't he just disappear?”

“Things are strange up there,” Bitty said. “I don't think he's safe.”

The only thing that comforted me about that was it meant soon I would be able to take him down for good.

As more Humans started to trickle down to Quint, at some point we'd outgrow the small tract that could sustain us. We needed to go elsewhere, and I knew just where. The other planets.

Killick, Kuhn, Marxuach, Andra, Beta Granade.
They were sitting there, empty, false towns full of dead people. I had begun to dream that we could get people to live there.

“We're going to run out of resources,” Reza said. “Our population is growing too fast.” He meant aliens and Humans.

“The new Humans could be trained on how to settle. They could be given supplies and other necessities to cultivate their own land. Then, finally, they can settle in and stop wandering.”

“You've really thought this out,” Reza said.

“It's possible. It's really possible.”

I had seen this dream before. When I heard myself talking about it, I could feel myself come alive.

Brother Blue and I were almost the same.

There was a knock at the door.

“You have to meet with him,” Ednette said. “I cannot answer all the questions that he has.”

“I can give you a script,” I said. “He can't know that I'm here. It's not the right time.”

“He knows that there is someone else in charge,” Ednette says. “He knows by my markings. And he won't listen to me. He's asking questions about the mold.”

We had allowed moisture into our pollen holding bin so that mold would grow and reduce its worth.

“It's time,” Reza said.

I finally agreed to meet with him. We'd edged into summer, and so it was hot in Ednette's hut. Or perhaps it was just that I was nervous. I refused to take off my protective gear, as though it would insulate me against the evil that I was about to greet. Reza and Ednette stood behind me, close enough to catch me if I fell. Close enough to hold me back if I lunged.

The door opened, and at first, all I saw was light and shadow. Then the shadow separated into three beings—all Human. First came Myfanwy and Caleb. The tallest one was Brother Blue. He looked larger then I remembered. It was as if every time I saw him, it was through a different lens.

He took off his coverings and looked just as smooth and collected as he usually did. I wondered how someone so awful could have eyes that smiled. But there they were, looking right at me. Looking merry.

He removed his gloves and stuck out his hand to shake mine.

I nearly stumbled back, but Reza put his hand on my shoulder to steady me.

Everyone in the hut knowing my prejudice against him was staring at me. I shook his hand, and then slowly removed the scarf over my mouth, my hood, and my goggles and met his stare.

At first he started, and his eyes lost their arrogant joy. His face hardened, but then recovered quickly. Even though I could see hate in his face, I knew he would not show any weakness in front of other Humans. He had to play it off as though it being me was part of his plan.

“It's you,” he said and then he began to laugh. “Of course it is.”

“There is nothing funny about this meeting,” I said.

“Oh, but there is,” he said. “It's a good thing you were so hard to kill, or else I'd be in a real pickle.”

“We're only here because we have mutual interests,” I said. “We're only here because it's best if we work together.”

The very words tasted bitter in my mouth. I could hardly believe I was saying them, and yet I knew them to be true.

“Tula, you have the gift.” Brother Blue said. “We're doing good work here.”

“I've done good work here. I am on the ground.”

“Yes,” he said. “You've done a remarkable job at filling in the gaps that I can't. I always knew you had something in you, Tula Bane. I saw it when you were a child. You should thank me for encouraging you.”

I balked. There was no way I was going to thank this man.

He was talking to me as though I was still his assistant, and part of me almost wanted to fall into that role because it was still familiar. I remembered how to get things done his way, but I hated the way people's attention shifted from me to him. He was more charismatic. He was brighter. I was sullen, withdrawn, and inhuman. Alien. I seemed cold even though my heart was bursting.