Authors: Emily Goodwin
“Pheebs!” Rochelle scolded.
“No!” she retorted and rose from Rochelle’s cot. “She need to hear truth! They make us have sex, all kinds. I sorry you here,” she continued. “Here is hell.”
Her words hung in the air and nobody spoke. Lily picked at the frayed hem of the tribal-print skirt she was wearing, and Rochelle clenched her jaw and moved her eyes to the floor, looking almost as if Phoebe’s words were offensive.
"How did you get here?" I quietly asked.
Lily twisted her red hair between her fingers. "I started doing
things
for money. I was out on the street a few nights a week. I didn't charge much. Then I met Zane, and he said he could get me like twice what I was making if I worked with him." She yanked on her ponytail and shook her head. "And he did. But it didn't last long. He started taking it. Then I, like, got into some trouble with my stepdad and got kicked out. I didn't have anywhere to go, so I called Zane, and I've been here ever since."
“How old are you?”
“I just turned fourteen.”
"Aren't your parents looking for you?" I blurted.
Lily's innocent eyes flashed like blue glass. "We're not all lucky enough to have nice families like you," she spat.
"Sorry."
"Nah, it's not your fault," she recovered. "My mom has too many issues and my stepdad likes to drink. And cheat. And hit. I've, like, run away so many times they probably figured that's what happened."
"Do you want to go home?" I asked gently.
She shrugged. "What do I have to go home to?" Her eyes glossed over and she stood up, making a big deal of stacking the cards and pushing the chairs into the table.
"What about you?" I asked Phoebe.
"I want to come to United States," she stated. "Thought I got modeling job. Nate pay for everything, even got me visa." She shook her head. "I don't think visa real."
"It's not all bad like this," I felt compelled to tell her.
"I know. Bad parts and bad people where I'm from too." She gave me a small, pressed smile. "It's been six months. Lily here almost year. Rochelle even longer. Other girls come and go. We don't know why we stay."
"Rochelle says it's because the clients like us, like regulars. I've seen the same girls in the clubs. They just don't live in one of Nate's houses," Lily explained.
"Clubs?" I inquired.
Phoebe nodded. "Dance clubs, strip clubs, whatever they called. Less touching when work there. I like it better."
"Until they get you backstage," Lily added ruefully.
“Does it end?” I whispered, asking a question I already knew the answer to.
“Not well,” Phoebe answered just as quietly.
“There has to be a way,” I pressed.
Phoebe shook her head. “I try. Many times. And no.”
I ground my teeth and forced back tears, refusing to believe that I was never leaving this place. “People are looking for me,” I said suddenly, my voice too full of hope. “When they find me, you will be found too.”
“
If
they find you,” Lily corrected. She pressed her full lips together and shook her head, causing red ringlets to fall into her eyes. “Why would they even think to look here?”
“I don’t even know where we are,” I blurted.
“Somewhere near Des Moines,” Phoebe told me. “But out in country.”
“There is nothing around this house,” Lily went on. “For miles, literally. It’s like a century old farmhouse, restored, obviously. I think the land is, like, historical or something. Nobody does anything to it.” She shrugged and then yawned. “I’m
so
tired,” she mumbled and pushed herself off the bed. She kicked off her heels and stretched her feet before moving to another cot and pulling back the covers. “Addie,” she said softly. “I wish I had something to say to make this better, but I don’t.” She gave me a sympathetic smile and got into her bed.
“What’s going to happen to me?” I asked.
Lily looked at Rochelle, who shook her head. “I don’t know,” Rochelle spoke. “Girls like you haven’t been here before. Nobody looked for us.” Her brown eyes narrowed so slightly I almost didn’t see it. With a huff, she rolled over, wincing when she moved her foot. Phoebe got up and went to another cot as well. She wrapped a blanket around her shoulders and leaned against the wall. Beneath the layers and layers of makeup that was applied to her face, I could see the dark circles that pulled down on her eyes. Just what had they been forced to do for the last three days?
CHAPTER SEVEN
LATER THAT DAY, when the sun began to glow a reddish haze, the basement door opened. Zane clunked down the stairs.
“Time for work, ladies,” he announced.
I glared at him then glanced back at Phoebe. The screw in my back pocket poked at my butt uncomfortably. Maybe with her help we could get away.
“What the hell is this?” he demanded when he saw the pillow underneath Rochelle’s ankle. He snatched it up and grabbed her foot.
She woke up crying out in pain. Phoebe shot up and Lily cowered under her blankets. “I tripped,” Rochelle mumbled, biting back tears. “But it’s fine. I can still work tonight.” She pushed herself up and moved toward Zane.
“Get up,” he said, his voice level.
My stomach twisted as I watched Rochelle struggle to her feet. There was something desperate in her eyes, something more than wanting his approval so that he wouldn’t hurt her. She looked at him with admiration and awe. She wanted to please him, not for her safety, but for her happiness. Zane put his hand on her arm, steadying her. Rochelle melted into his touch.
He looked into her eyes and slowly licked his lips. “Can you walk?”
Her head bobbed up and down. “Mh-hm,” she quipped in high-pitched agreement. She took a step and faltered. Zane caught her, bringing her body close to his. He smiled when she thanked him but quickly cast his eyes away, the smile instantly fading.
“Come with me,” he ordered.
“She shouldn’t put weight on it,” I said softly, scared of Zane.
“Nate needs to see this,” he said in a condescending tone.
“Then have him come here,” I spat back, surprised at the venom in my voice.
Zane snaked his arm around Rochelle and sneered at me. “Don’t tell me what to do, cunt.”
“Don’t call me that, asshole,” I retorted and was again surprised at how easily the insult rolled off my tongue.
“Addie, stop,” Rochelle whispered. “I’m fine.” She clung onto Zane. “Come on, let’s go.” I unclenched my fists and watch them disappear up the stairs.
“You shouldn’t make him mad,” Lily warned. “He
is
an asshole. A really. Big. Asshole,” she said slowly. “One who doesn’t like to get insulted.”
I swallowed my fear. “I don’t care.”
“You should care,” Phoebe spoke. “I used to not care. I tired of getting hurt.”
Lily folded her blanket down. “He’s leaves you alone if you leave him alone and do what you’re told,” she said. “Most of the time, at least.”
I ran my hands over my face, and that weird feeling of not really being in my body began to take over. I stared at a brown stain on the faded yellow quilt on my bed until my vision went blurry. I knew Lily and Phoebe had gotten up and were moving around, but I didn’t know what they were doing. I couldn’t bring myself to move to look at them. I didn’t want to acknowledge anything around me. If I didn’t see it, then maybe it wasn’t real.
“Adeline,” Zane’s called in a deep voice, startling me. I tipped my head up and looked into his beautiful blue eyes and was immediately sucked out of my unrealistic reverie. “You’re filling in for Rochelle tonight.”
My mouth opened but no sound came out. Suddenly I wasn’t able to breathe. My chest tightened and the peanut butter sandwich I recently ate rose in my throat. Zane laughed and walked away, leaving Rochelle to hobble to the bed unassisted.
“I only got one tonight,” Rochelle said as if to comfort me.
“Sometimes you have more than one?” I somehow managed to squeak out.
“Most of the time,” she replied casually.
“I won’t do it,” I said definitely and shook my head. “I won’t. I won’t.”
“You have to,” Rochelle said.
“No, I don’t. They can’t make me. I refuse.”
“Just do it, Addie.” Lily’s voice came from across the room. “I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
“They won’t hurt me that much. I heard Nate say that they prefer us to look pretty.”
Lily frowned and looked at Phoebe. “Addie,” she said slowly. “He
will
hurt you. He tie you down and
make
you work.”
“No,” I cried and ran my hands through my hair, stopping to dig my nails into my scalp. “No. No, no, no!”
“She’s freaking out.” Rochelle sighed. “Get me a Xanax.”
“No have,” Phoebe replied. She pulled her shirt over her head and traded the pink bra she was wearing for one made of see-through black lace. Then she opened up the dresser drawer and rooted around until she found a pill bottle. “But have this.” She tossed the little orange bottle to Rochelle. Without looking at the label, Rochelle pressed and twisted off the cap. She stuck one pill in her mouth and held out another.
“Take this,” she told me. I clamped my mouth shut and shook my head. I had never seen, let alone done drugs before in my life. “Addie, it will help.” She held out her hand, and I shook my head again. For good measure, I crossed my arms and looked away. “Fine,” she sighed. “Suit yourself. I won’t force you.”
“Thank you,” I said and let my body relax just a little.
“You’re welcome,” she replied and leaned closer to me. Suddenly, she pitched forward, pinched my arm, and popped the pill into my mouth when I cried out in pain. She pressed her hand over my lips and held me close to her. The pill dissolved almost immediately.
“Now you’ll really thank me,” she said and tightened her grip. She was surprisingly strong, and I wasn’t able to fight her off until the pill was nearly gone.
I spit out what I could on the floor. “What the hell?” I shouted.
“I hate seeing people get their ass beat,” she told me. “It’ll take a while to kick in. You need to shower. I’ll do your hair and makeup. Get up.” When I didn’t move, she grabbed my wrist and gave me a shake. “Addie! Come on! You’re going to regret this.”
“Yes,” I said when I moved my feet to the floor. “I will.”
In a haze, I got up and moved to the shower. I turned on the water and waited. I had no clothes to change into, no towel, and soon I would have no dignity.
“Here,” Lily said and pulled an unfolded towel from a basket that was stashed under the make-shift vanity table. “The water, like, never warms up, either,” she advised. “It’s best, like, to get in and get it over with. Oh,” she said suddenly and turned around. She pulled a package of disposable razors from the bottom of the towel basket. At least it was unopened. “Make sure the only hair on your body is on your head.”
I nodded, feeling devoid of emotions. Was it from the drugs? Or was the situation too much for my mind to handle?
“And,” she continued, bending over again and rooting though a box under the sink. “You need to take one of these. Everyday.”
Immediately, I recognized the little yellow plastic container. I took it from her and opened it. I stared at the little pills and didn’t hesitate to pop the birth control pill into my mouth, swallowing it dry. I stepped out of my filthy shorts and pulled my shirt over my head. I moved behind the slimy shower curtain and took off the rest of my clothes, dropping them on the cement floor. I took the razor, my fingers barely grasping it, and stepped into the freezing water.
It stunned me at first, sending a wave of shock and awareness through my mind. A few seconds later, the drugs pushed all logic away and I just stood there, letting the cold water pelt down on me. Soon my body was as physically as numb as it was emotionally. Feeling like someone set me on autopilot, I began washing my hair.
I nicked my legs more than once, since I was shivering nonstop. I watched the blood swirl down the yellow stained drain. Teeth chattering, I tipped my head and stared, wishing I could disappear down the drain as well.
“Addie?” Lily’s voice spoke from outside the curtain. “You okay in there? It’s been a while. You have to be freezing.”
I slowly blinked and shook myself. I turned the water off and pulled back the curtain just far enough to grab the towel. I wrapped it around my goosebump-covered torso and walked back to my cot, water dripping on the floor. Dirt and grit stuck to my wet feet. Normally, that would have grossed me out, but what was a little dirt compared to what was going to happen to me?
Phoebe and Lily exchanged sorrowful looks. Phoebe came up behind me and gently towel dried my hair.
I just sat there, completely still except for the shivering.
“Here,” Lily offered and held out a robe.
Holding the towel up with one hand, I snaked my arms through the crushed velvet robe and tied it around myself.
"I don't get your tattoos," she said and tipped her head.
"Theban," I simplified and looked at the squiggly characters that surrounded a triple moon symbol my left shoulder blade. "It's an old alphabet. It’s from a book."
"Oh." Lily nodded. "What about that one? It's a circle inside a triangle with a line through it?"
"From another book," I summed up, looking at the tattoo on my wrist. I had one more tattoo on my left side. I parted the robe to show her. "Get this one?"
"Nope. 'To infinity'," she read. "Don't get it."
"'And beyond'," Phoebe finished. "I like
Toy Story.
Who has other half?"
"My best friend, Lynn," I told her, my voice hollow.
"You must miss her," Lily said quietly. I bit my lip and nodded. Lily looked at me for a few seconds, her blue eyes flashing with emotions. She closed them, shook her head, and put on a small smile. “Rochelle will do your makeup,” she said. I nodded and rose from the cot and made my way over to the makeshift vanity. Rochelle was leaning on the counter, keeping the weight off of her injured ankle. I sat on a rickety stool and faced the mirror.