Starbird Murphy and the World Outside (12 page)

“Europa works at the café, too,” said Venus. “She moved here a few months ago from the Farm in B.C. and probably works harder than anyone.”

“I just think that Beacon House should look somewhat presentable when EARTH gets back,” said Europa. “Are you a Believer?”

“Yes,” I said.

“Good, you can help tip the scales. Cham, do you need some more tea?”

“Yes,” Cham groaned from the couch.

Europa went back into the kitchen and I followed V up the stairs. “My room.” She pointed to a blue door to the right of the landing. “There's one of our two overused, undersized bathrooms across the hall. This is Europa's room, which she shares with Kale and Eris, and, yes, two-year-olds
do
cry in the middle of the night, and it
will
wake you up. This is the way to Ephraim's.” V touched a string hanging from the ceiling that was attached to a rectangular wooden door. “But you probably want to see your room.” She walked to the door directly across the hall from hers, knocked twice, and opened it. A pretty girl with short, curly blonde hair, wearing a slim red slip, was holding a hairbrush in front of a full-length mirror. She looked at us, her glossy lips open and her eyes wide.

“I will share anything”—she held up her brush like it was a cross and I was a vampire—“bedroom, bathroom, toothbrush, diary—but I'm not giving up this closet. V, you know how long I had to wait for my own closet.”

V took the ratty bag of clothes out of my hand. “Since these are all her worldly possessions, I don't think you need to worry.” She dropped it in the middle of the rug.

I felt ashamed, looking at the bag I once used to carry wood, sitting there in the middle of the floor with everything I'd brought with me, the ragged flannel shirts and the pilled sweaters. I was a farm girl who was very far away from the farm.

“Those are
all
your clothes?” The girl clutched the hairbrush over her heart.

“This is your new roommate, and I'm going to offer you a deal, Io. You can keep all the closet space and give Starbird the small dresser,
if
you find this girl something to wear tomorrow that's acceptable for food service, and something for school this week.” V reached into her pocket and pulled out a green bill and handed it to the blonde girl. It shocked me for a minute, watching the two exchange cash like it was nothing.

“Twenty dollars will hardly buy a T-shirt.” Io sighed, examining the paper money. “Luckily, I'm a miracle worker. Plus, she's my size.”

“Great,” said V. “I'm going to check on Ephraim. There are sheets in the linen closet for your bed, Starbird.”

V pulled the string in the hall ceiling and a row of stairs connected to the wooden panel descended. When she disappeared up them, I turned back to Io.

“Shower first. I prefer to cut hair wet,” she said, pulling on a T-shirt over her slip.

“Cut hair?” I reached for the ponytail that was snaking its way down my back toward my waist.

“Don't worry, I'm not thinking bob or pixie. It will still be long, it will just have some . . . shape.”

She walked past me to a little closet in the hall and handed me a towel. “Hot water is a problem in the morning, but this time of day you'll have plenty.”

I left my things on my new bed and took the towel into the bathroom, closing the door. The space was cramped, with enough room to turn around between the claw-foot tub and the sink, but nothing extra. I disrobed and stepped into the tub, pulling the makeshift shower curtain around the rim. It was not unlike the shower in the main house on the Farm. The thought of it made my stomach ache.
Did Ursa give the chickens their second feeding? What if she doesn't close up the coop properly and the coyotes get in? What are Fern and Eve making for dinner? Does Indus care that I'm gone?

I turned the knobs by the faucet. Hot water ran down my neck and shoulders and stung my scraped hand. I pulled it up to my face, looking at the red lines that ran from my thumb to my pinky. I closed my eyes and tipped my head back into the water. As it disappeared down the drain, I tried to let the Farm go with it. I was in a new life. I was in the World Outside.

 10 

I
o's scissors sliced through my hair. “Your red highlights look amazing out here in the sun.”

It was the first time in my life that someone other than Fern Moon had given me a haircut. When Fern did it, she used a piece of twine to make a straight line above the split ends, and cut right across my back. Io seemed to have a more artistic approach, studying and snipping and studying again. We were sitting in the backyard where the early evening light was still bright enough. Chunks of reddish-blonde hair lay around my feet in a ring.

“Do you work at the café?” I asked as Io pulled the comb. I was wearing a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt she'd loaned me.

“Used to,” she said, picking up her scissors again, “but the food industry is not my thing. I work at Red Light now. Mostly vintage, some new clothes. I'm a buyer.”

“Did EARTH make you a Buyer?” I was thinking about the Traders on the farm, the ones who were allowed to handle money and do business in town.

“EARTH?” She laughed. “My boss at Red Light made me a buyer when he noticed I had an eye for fashion. I'm not real big on the EARTH thing, with the Translations and all. I'm like V. I sort of outgrew it.”

My breath caught in my throat. Io didn't believe in the Translations? She had “outgrown” EARTH and so had V? I already liked V and Io so much, and they weren't true Believers?

Io seemed to notice my discomfort. “You shouldn't listen to me,” she added brightly. “I'm cynical and sometimes I upset people. How do you feel about bangs?”

“Bangs?”

“Believe me, with your gigantic eyes, you will break hearts with bangs.” Io stood in front of me, comb balanced in her left fingers, scissors in her right.

I'm in the World Outside now
. “Okay, bangs.”

Io combed the wet hair over my face, dropping a curtain on my sight. “Speaking of broken hearts, did you leave any on the Farm?”

The image of Indus and Lyra in the Sanctuary played like a movie clip. “Maybe my own.”

“Oh sorry.” She cut three times through my hair, and I could see again. Io leaned in to me, her gaze darting critically at the hair around my face. She had delicate lines of black on her eyelids and gray powder above them. “Well, he would be kicking himself if he could see you with this hot new haircut.” She handed me a mirror with a handle.

My hair was not in a ponytail, as I had worn it every day of my life at the Farm. Instead, it was hanging straight and silky around my face and shoulders, several inches shorter than it had been, especially the side-swept bangs that reached to my jaw. It looked healthier, somehow shinier, and Io was right about the red highlights that reached to the feathery ends of the cut.

“Stand up and turn around,” she said. When we stood toe to toe, she looked me over. Io and I were roughly the same height and build, except that she was soft in all the places I was muscular. “Don't shave your legs,” she said, “even if most of the girls at school do. It's cooler if you don't, but they might still make fun of you.”

“They might make fun of me?”

Io took one of my hands. “You're really pretty, Starbird.” She sounded almost sad when she said it. “Did they tell you that you need to be careful in the city? Don't walk alone at night. Don't talk to men you don't know. Watch out for the boys at school, too. It can be dangerous here.”

I opened my mouth to ask exactly what I needed to watch out for when a voice came booming through the screen door from the kitchen. “Our newcomer has arrived!” A man in his midfifties was standing there, gray hair streaking through his brown beard and a warm smile on his face. “Welcome home, Starbird.” He put his hands together in prayer position over his heart.

I did the same. I had known Ephraim for years from his Farm pickups and Family gatherings. I had loved him since I was little, but so had all the kids on the Farm. He was a giant teddy bear of a man.

“Come in and talk with me over a cup of tea.” He held open the screen door.

I left Io to sweep up my hair and followed Ephraim through the kitchen where Europa and V were chopping vegetables for dinner. We went to an adjoining room and sat at a large wood table where a teapot was waiting. Ephraim sat down but then started coughing so hard, he had to stand again. After a minute, it passed.

“I remember when I got my Calling,” he said, pouring us each a cup and fixing me with his hazel-colored eyes. Ephraim's eyes were such an unusual blend of green and brown, they always seemed to be dancing. He had this way of looking at you that made you feel like you were a rare bird that he was the first person to discover.

“My Calling came during the Summer Solstice twenty years ago. I had never been one for cooking, but that year they were shorthanded in the kitchen and EARTH put me in charge of fixing green beans for two hundred people, which meant several sauté pans working at once. I'll admit, the camaraderie of the kitchen was exhilarating. But it was really when I watched the Family members dishing my green beans onto their plates, adults feeding green beans to their children, children asking for more, that I knew. It felt just like waking up.
I'm Called to be a cook
, I thought, or discovered, or realized. EARTH agreed and he sent me to the café, and here I am still, the happiest man you ever met.” Ephraim spread out his arms, and his eyes danced all around his face. Then he coughed again.

“And so, Starbird has gotten her Calling,” he said when he had cleared his throat. “Tell me, how did it feel?”

“Well”—I pulled one foot up onto my chair and grabbed my ankle—“V said you needed help at the restaurant . . .”

Ephraim nodded.

“And then Ursa said it must be my Calling . . .” I continued, “and so I figured I should come here.” It was a shaky dismount at best.

“And did you just
know
in your heart that you were being Called?”

“Not . . . exactly.”

Ephraim looked at me, the wrinkles around his eyes contracted slightly. He took a sip from his teacup. “Starbird, have you experienced the wisdom of the Translations?”

“Yes,” I said. “I've been to Translations every Sunday from the time I was ten until EARTH left. Fern taught me about the Translations before I was born, or when I was too young to hear them.”

“And do you believe that EARTH is Translating the Cosmos?” Ephraim was still smiling.

“Yes,” I said. “I'm a true Believer.”

“And do you believe that EARTH is coming back to our Family?”

“Yes. I've read all of his letters,” I answered, trying to sound fully assured. “What about you?”

Ephraim leaned back in his chair. “Yes, yes, and yes! I'm a Believer. Actually, you could call me a Knower. I know it's true because I've felt it. I've felt the Imagination of the Cosmos, and I know EARTH feels it, too, and deeply. EARTH's real gift is giving
voice
to the Cosmos.” Ephraim touched his chest. He looked like he was about to laugh or cry, and I couldn't guess which.

“Do you know that EARTH saved my life?”

I shook my head.

“I used to be a drinker before I met EARTH. No, scratch that, the truth is I used to be a
drunk
. I lied to people, drank all day, couldn't keep a job. I had a wife and a kid, but I let them down so many times, they left me. The day I met EARTH, I was at rock bottom. It was a Wednesday, and I was half drunk by mid-afternoon. I had just lost my latest job working at the docks, which was the best job I had ever managed to get. I swore I wouldn't lose it, and then I did, because I tied one on and slept through my alarm. I was sure I was about to lose this house. Anyway, I was only half drunk, and I wanted to find some lunch so I could keep on drinking, and I wandered right into the café, probably raving like a jerk, I don't know. I ordered something and EARTH delivered it. Can you imagine, EARTH playing waiter at the café?” Ephraim held up his hand like he was holding a tray.

“Well, he sat down with me at my table and started talking. You know what? We didn't stop talking for five hours. We ate lunch and then we ate dinner. He must have had other things to do, other people to worry about, but he didn't leave me. He just stayed with me for five hours pouring me tea and bringing me food, asking me about my life. Every time I tried to leave, he would say, ‘Just stay for five more minutes, friend. You're safe here.' I don't know how he did it, but I didn't go for another drink that night. Can you imagine? I was a dedicated drunk and all I even thought about was my next drink but I didn't want to leave him. How do you explain that?” Ephraim paused and shook his head. “Anyway, EARTH talked me into going back to the Farm with him the next morning, and once I was there I couldn't get my hands on a drink without walking twenty miles to Bellingham. And that was it. I didn't have another drink ever again, Starbird. That's how I know it's true.” Ephraim pointed a finger toward the ceiling. “I never got my wife back, but I do have my son.”

I had never seen a member of the Free Family drink. EARTH Translated that the use of alcohol would corrupt us and lead us from our path.

“We both know something about losing people.” Ephraim put his hand on top of mine. His knuckles were thick and wide, and his skin was covered in dark brown spots. “I've always listened for news of Doug. Whenever traveling Family passes through the café, I ask.”

Ephraim had been really kind to me and Fern during his café pickups after Doug disappeared.

I nodded.

“But this is your time now, Starbird. Doug was very smart—I mean, Doug
is
very smart. He'll be fine.” I thought Ephraim was trying to convince himself as much as me.

V walked into the room with a kettle and started to add hot water to the teapot.

“V, we have another Believer here.” Ephraim motioned toward me. “Maybe she can join me and Cham and Europa in helping our stray lambs.”

V didn't look at me; she just kept filling the teapot. “Dinner's ready,” she said. “Come and get in line.”