Spiral of Bliss 02 Allure (10 page)

“Um… your turn.” I sank to my knees next to the coffee table, which concealed my nakedness from him, but the fact that he was sitting across from me with his shirt off and...

“I can’t fucking think,” Dean muttered. He stared at the Scrabble board. A sheen of sweat gleamed on his forehead.

“No touching,” I whispered. I was starting to throb. “You made the rules.”

“Yeah, so I can change them.”

I drew in a breath, but managed to shake my head. “No way.”

We played a few more rounds, both somehow keeping our scores to at least five points. Before long I had the distinct feeling I wasn’t going to see Dean take his jeans off. I also wasn’t certain I’d be able to strip more than I already had, but then I took the last tile.

Disappointment lanced through me. I looked at Dean.

“Game over,” I said.

He swore, dropping his head into his hands.

“Your rules,” I reminded him.

While his head was still lowered, I slithered back into my skirt and panties.

“But,” I continued, “the game’s over now.”

He lifted his head.

“And you never said anything about no touching
after
the game.” My stomach knotted with both nervousness and excitement as I approached him. “Right?”

He didn’t respond, his gaze hot on mine. He hadn’t put his shirt on yet, and I surrendered to the urge to run my hand over his smooth shoulder. His muscles bunched beneath my palm.

Before I could sink onto the sofa beside him, he gripped the backs of my thighs and pulled me closer into the V of his legs. I stared down at him, his thick hair glossy in the light, the straight ridge of his nose, and slope of his chest.

His big hands slid beneath my skirt. I gasped. Shivers coursed through my entire body as he stroked upward to splay his hands over my cotton-clad rear. He slipped a finger beneath the elastic and touched the crevice of my bottom.

My whole body weakened. I clutched his shoulders to steady myself. He took hold of my panties and pulled them down my legs until they were tangled around my knees. He grasped my hips and pulled me down onto his lap. I settled sideways against him, into the half-circle of his strong arm supporting my back.

He lowered his head, his mouth capturing mine in a deep kiss that heated my blood. I tucked my hands into his hair and spread my legs against the constriction of my underwear. He pushed my skirt up and pressed his hand to my sex.

“Fuck, Liv, you’re so wet…” Dean’s breath warmed my skin as he moved his lips to my neck.

I shifted, inhaling sharply when he circled a finger around my clit. Beneath me, his erection pressed against my thigh. I spread my hand over his chest, tracing the ridges of his muscles, feeling the pulsing beat of his heart.

I sought his mouth again and sank into his kiss, arching my hips to meet his stroking fingers. Urgency laced my lower body. He stroked a finger up one side of my folds, around my clit, down the other side…

I broke away from Dean with a gasp and stared at him. His lust-dark eyes burned into mine.

“You’re doing it,” I whispered breathlessly.

“I hope so.”

“I mean… what I told you. That night we had… when I was in Castleford and we talked on the phone and you asked me how I like touching myself. You’re doing it now. Exactly the way I described.”

“I do pay attention.” A smile curved a corner of his mouth. “And I’ve always been a pretty good student.”

He slipped a finger inside me. I clenched around him. A trickle of sweat ran down my temple. A delicious coil of pleasure wound through me. I bucked upward again, straining toward that deep, bright bliss that lay just beyond my reach.

“So good.” I reached down to grasp his wrist, my blood scorching. “I’m going to…”

I bit my lower lip to prevent myself from crying out. Dean flicked his thumb over my clit and tightened his arm around me when pleasure shook me to the core. I writhed in his lap, arching shamelessly into his fingers as he eased the ricocheting sensations from my body.

“Pretty.” He brushed his mouth against mine.

The buzz of his cell phone broke me out of my sensual haze. I shifted in his lap. He muttered a complaint and pulled me closer, nuzzling his nose into my hair.

“I think… I think that’s your phone,” I said.

“I don’t care.” He stroked his lips down the side of my neck. “You smell so damn good.”

“Dean.” Shivers rained down my spine. I squirmed. “Um…”

He lifted his head. “You okay?”

“I need to use the bathroom.”

“Oh.” He patted my hip and eased me off his lap.

I smoothed my skirt back over my legs and headed for the bathroom. After using the toilet, I washed my hands and splashed water over my face. My skin was flushed, and my hair was loose and messy around my shoulders. I used Dean’s comb to work out the tangles and left the bathroom.

His voice came from the living room, low and threaded with anger. A knot of worry constricted my chest.

I paused, my guilt over eavesdropping outweighed by curiosity.

“No, Paige,” he snapped into the phone. “If he wants to talk to me, he can damn well call me himself… I could give a shit about her.
No.
I won’t deal with his goddamned mess again.”

I ducked back into the bathroom and closed the door.

Dean and his sister must have been talking about their brother. All I knew about Archer West was that he was Dean’s younger brother and seemed to be a troublemaker. From what I knew, Dean’s mother and sister often called on Dean to fix things.

That thought lodged in a part of my brain where wariness and fear lived.

I waited until the rumble of his voice stopped before I returned to him. He was pulling his T-shirt back over his head, his movements tense and restless.

“Is everything okay?” I asked.

“Yeah.” He shoved his arms into the sleeves and turned away from me.

I ran my hands down the sides of my skirt and watched as he paced to the windows.

“Was that your sister?” I asked, painfully aware that I was wading into treacherous waters.

“Yeah.”

“And were you talking about your brother?”

“Yeah.” His tone was clipped. He dragged a hand through his hair and sighed. “Look, I need to get outside, go for a run. Do you mind?”

“No.” I suppressed the wish that he would confide in me.
None of your business, Liv. Leave it alone.
“Go ahead. I’ll be here.”

“Good.” He kissed me again before going into the bedroom to change.

“I’ll be an hour, hour and a half.” He grabbed his keys and cell phone. “Call if you need me.”

I nodded.
If you need me.
I was beginning to need him more than I should have. More than I wanted to.

After he’d gone, I went into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. I took out containers of pasta salad, minestrone soup, and meatballs in marinara sauce that we’d gotten from the deli. I set the table with some nice, white plates I’d found on sale at Target. I put all the salads into the matching serving bowls, got out a bottle of wine, and had everything almost ready by the time Dean came in the door.

“Hey, thanks. You didn’t have to do this.” His face was flushed with cold and exertion, his collar damp with sweat. “But it looks great. I’ll take a quick shower, okay?”

“Sure.”

He headed into the bathroom. I heated up the meatballs in the microwave and put them on the table just as the landline phone rang.

The automated voice announced,
“Call from California.”

My heart stuttered. Dean must have turned off his cell. I went to the phone and stared at the display, a 408 area code number. It rang again.

Don’t, Liv.

I tightened my fingers around the receiver.

Don’t. None of your business.

Ring.

I picked up the phone.

Ring.

Stop, Liv!

I pushed the talk button. “Hello?”

Silence on the other end.

“Dean West’s residence.” I felt like my grip on the phone could break the plastic.

“Oh.” An older woman’s voice, wary and sharp. “Is Dean there?”

“He’s… um, he’s unavailable right now. Can I take a message?”

Another woman’s voice sounded in the background. There was a muffled noise, an incoherent discussion, a rasp across the phone’s speaker.

“Who is this?” the woman asked.

“This is Liv.” Unease inched up my throat. “I’m a friend of Dean’s.”

“Well, Liv, friend of Dean’s, where is he?”

“He’s taking a shower.” The instant I said that, I winced.

“Taking a shower?” She sounded as if I’d said he was skydiving.

“Is this his mother?” I asked.

“Yes, it is. Joanna West.”

“I’ll let him know you called, Mrs. West.”

“Do that, would you?” she replied. “And tell him to leave his cell phone on.”

There was a click as she hung up. I put the receiver down.

Shame filled me. What was I trying to do—make sure his family knew I’d staked a claim? That Dean and I were close enough now that I hung out at his apartment and had the right to answer his phone?

I shook my head and hurried to finish getting dinner organized. A few minutes later, Dean emerged in a clean, white T-shirt and jeans, his hair damp. My stomach twisted with a combination of pleasure and unease. As powerful as our physical attraction was, it was becoming fraught with a strange undercurrent of secrecy and evasiveness.

“Your… your mother called,” I told him as he opened the bottle of wine.

He paused. “And you answered the phone?”

“I didn’t know I shouldn’t.”

“It’s probably best if you don’t again.”

“Oh.” I tried to deflect a wave of hurt. “Okay. Sorry.”

“Liv.”

I didn’t want to be
that
woman who sulks at a perceived slight, but… really? He didn’t want me answering the phone when his mother called?

I turned to set plates on the table. His hands closed around my shoulders.

“Liv.”

I spun around to face him. “She asked me who I was, Dean. You haven’t told her? I didn’t even know what to say.”

Renewed irritation hardened his eyes. “I haven’t told her, haven’t told any of them, because it’s none of their damned business. I don’t tell my family about my personal life.”

“You haven’t told me about them, either,” I reminded him. “Is that because it’s none of my business?”

“No.” He spread out his hands. “It’s because I like
this
, Liv. I like having you to myself. And I don’t want you dealing with my family’s crap.”

“Why, because I’m too fragile?” The unpleasant thought reemerged. “Or because you’re trying to fix me?”

“What?”

“Your family all comes to you to fix things, right? I don’t want you to do the same thing with me.”

“Because I like what we have, I suddenly want to fix you?”

“That’s what you seem to do with them,” I pointed out. “And if your family is such a mess, then why aren’t you?”

“What?”

“You’ve always been the golden boy, haven’t you?” The differences between us suddenly seemed as wide as a chasm. “Football star, valedictorian, full scholarships, then a doctorate
summa cum laude
? Best-looking guy at school. Bet you dated the homecoming queen.”

“What the…”

“I was held back a grade, did I ever tell you that? My mother and I moved around so much that I always struggled to keep up with my classmates. One district wouldn’t enroll me because I tested below my grade level, so I had to repeat fifth grade, and even then I needed extra tutoring because I was so behind. I was lucky they didn’t send me back to
fourth
grade.”

“Liv…” Dean stepped toward me.

“There’s a reason I am the way I am, Dean.” I held up a hand to stop him, hating all the old feelings of inadequacy and fear. “There’s a reason I don’t have many friends and I’m so intense about my studies. There’s a reason why I’m still a virgin at twenty-four goddamn years old and why I’ve had such a hard time trusting people. It took me a long time and a lot of therapy, but I finally understood. What I
don’t
understand is how you can be the way you are if your family is anything
less
than perfect.”

“You think you’ve got me figured out because I worked my ass off to be successful?” His features tightened. “Because I
had
to? Yeah, the Wests are perfect… so perfect that no one has any idea how screwed up we really are.”

A muscle ticked in his jaw. He paced to the windows and back.

“My father is a justice on the California Supreme Court,” he said. “My mother sits on charity boards and holds fundraisers in between shopping and traveling. They live in a wealthy suburb of Silicon Valley, are a very prominent couple, and have had a shitty marriage for as long as I can remember.

“My mother had an affair years ago.” The words tumbled out of him in a rush. “My father stayed married to her because he needed her family’s money and couldn’t risk anything hurting his chances for being appointed to the appellate court. My brother is a high-school dropout who can’t hold a job, and my whole family resents me because my grandfather left me most of his money in a trust fund when he died. Because I was so goddamn good at being perfect.”

He stopped and turned to me, his expression so heartbreakingly vulnerable that I wanted nothing more than to make things better for him, to ease what seemed like an age-old pain.

“You’re the best thing that’s happened to me in… forever, Liv. The only person who doesn’t expect anything from me. Who doesn’t care that I’m not perfect.”

“You’re perfect to me,” I said honestly. “Perfect
for
me.”

“And that’s why I like what we have,” he said, the tension easing from his posture as he approached to stand in front of me. “Because you’re perfect for me too.”

“So what are we, then?” I asked. “When someone asks who I am, what am I supposed to say?”

“You say, ‘Hi, I’m Liv, Dean’s very hot and sexy lady.’”

I couldn’t smother a giggle. “Seriously.”

“Paramour?”

“No.”

“Cuddle bunny?”

“God, no.”

“Valentine? Sweetheart? Girlfriend?”