Spectacular Rascal: A Sexy Flirty Dirty Standalone Romance (29 page)

“All right, all right.” She closes her eyes and wiggles her ass, rubbing against where I’m getting thicker because that’s what two seconds of touching this woman does to me. “Tell me the story.”

“Once upon a time there was a man who loved his job,” I say, leaning down to murmur the words in her ear. “He loved it so much he named his shop Ink Addicts. And the name fit because he couldn’t imagine being addicted to anything else. But he was wrong.”

“Was he?” she asks, sounding like she likes the story so far.

“He was,” I continue. “Because there was this woman he’d never been able to get out of his head, this amazing, crazy, smart, funny, perfect woman who came back into his life when he least expected it and showed him what he’d been missing.”

Her hands fold over mine and squeeze. “And what was that?”

“Everything,” I say, my voice catching, because it’s true. She is everything, and I can’t believe I ever thought I had a full life without her. “I was missing all the good stuff. But now I’m not. Now I have my favorite person with me all the time, and a place where I’ll always belong, no matter where we go or what we do. Because you are my home, Mrs. Catherine Knight, and words can’t express how happy I am that you’re mine.”

“Oh man, I love you,” she says, sniffing as I turn us both around to face the shop window. “But don’t make me cry. I just got my mascara unsmudged.”

I kiss the top of her head. “Okay. I’ll stop. I just wanted you to know that I have a new addiction, and therefore, the shop has a new name. Open your eyes and check it out.”

She sniffs again, swiping at her cheeks as her eyes open. Almost immediately, she breaks into a delighted laugh. “Oh my God, is that Fifi?”

“It is.” I shift so I can see her face. “I was going to make the logo a pin-up style drawing of you, but I decided I didn’t want to share you with every asshole who comes in the front door. And Fang looked so kick ass in that leather jacket, it was really a no-brainer.”

“The Cat’s Fang,” she says, nodding slowly. “It’s the perfect name. Badass, but adorable, just like you.”

“I feel like I should say I’m not adorable, just to maintain street cred. But I already cried at my wedding, so I’m going to let that go without a fight.”

“You should.” She turns, twining her arms around my neck, beaming up at me. “I love this surprise. And I love you. And I love being your wife. I know it’s only been half an hour, but I’m pretty sure it’s the best thing ever.”

“I’m glad you think so.” I hug her closer, setting that now familiar fire to burning in the air between us. “And thanks for the thing with Dad. You made his year, I’m sure. He loves you a lot.”

“My pleasure. I love him, too.” She wrinkles her nose. “But he
was
asking about kids again today. I get the feeling a Chihuahua grandbaby isn’t going to be enough for him for much longer.”

“You didn’t tell him we were going to start trying, did you?”

She shakes her head, threading her fingers into my hair. “No way. Your penis and my vagina are none of his business.”

“Speaking of,” I say, my cock thickening. “Think we have time for a quickie in the new bathroom before everyone else arrives?”

“Considering Shane and Fifi are getting out of a cab at the end of the block right now, that’s doubtful,” she says, laughing. “Don’t look so sad, babe. I heard from a little bird that you’re getting lucky as soon as we get home tonight. Like, all night long lucky.”

I hug her tight. “Yeah? All night long?”

“All night long and into tomorrow,” she says, tilting her head back and bringing her lips closer to mine. “Because you look hot as hell in this tux. And since Fifi’s staying with Shane until we’re back from the honeymoon, we don’t have to worry about any spanking confusion.”

Spanking confusion—aka when Fang hears me slapping Cat’s ass through the door, thinks I’m hurting her mama, and whines like someone’s dying outside while Cat and I are trying to come—is a pain in the balls. “Spanking confusion is my least favorite part of being a dog dad. But I like the thought of knocking you up while I’m spanking you and fucking you hard from behind. Is that wrong?”

Her eyes glitter with lust and love and that particular breed of trouble that is hers and hers alone. “If it is, I don’t ever want you to be right.”

Her lips touch mine, but before we can make the moment into a proper mini-make out session, a firm, wiggling body squirms between our legs. We separate in time to see Fang, wearing the leather jacket I gave Shane to change her into as part of the surprise for Cat, running away down the street, hauling ass toward Washington Square Park. A moment later, Shane streaks after her, moving fast for a woman wearing three-inch heels.

“Fifi, come back here!” she shouts, before waving an arm our way. “Don’t worry, I’ll get her and bring her back. She’ll be fine! I swear! This is a game we play when we go walking in Central Park. She runs away, but she always comes back in a few minutes.”

Cat’s brow furrows with worry.

Before she can say a word, I assure her, “Of course we’re going to help get Fifi back on her leash. We’re responsible dog parents, and that’s what we do.”

Relief, mixed with enough affection to make me sure I’m the luckiest man in the world, floods her expression. “I love you. But don’t get any more perfect, okay? Or I’m going to start worrying that I’m dreaming again.”

“I’ll try,” I say, though I have no intention of doing anything of the sort. I’m not perfect, but I’m going to keep being as perfect for her as I can be, from now until the last day I’m lucky enough to hold her in my arms.

As if she knows exactly what I was thinking—which she probably does—she presses a kiss to my cheek with a happy humming noise. “Come on. You call her, and I’ll wait behind a stairway and pounce as soon as she gets close.”

It takes fifteen minutes, but we get Fifi back on her leash, get Shane calmed down, and get all of us back to the party. And for the next few hours, I celebrate with my friends before going home to make love to my very best friend.

And it lasts all night long, just that way she promised.

EPILOGUE

Two months later

And now something from Ferocious Fang

AKA Fifi, the Chihuahua

The sun is shining, the first hint of autumn is in the air, and it’s a beautiful day to be headed for the park! I’m so excited I can’t contain a delirious, head to tail, full body wag as I join my Cat by the door. My squirming makes it hard for my adorable human to get my harness on, but I can’t help myself.

We’re going to the park! The park!

And I’m going to see Lucky, the most wonderful dog in the world! I’m so happy I could bark, and I do, numerous times, until my Cat tells me to shush and picks me up to carry me down the stairs.

Despite good breeding and better training, I tug on my leash all the way down the street to the Hudson River dog run, but Furry doesn’t yell at me. He never yells. He’s a sweetheart who spoils me rotten and buys me beautiful clothes.

I usually try not to take advantage of his good nature, but with legs as long as his you would think he could move a little faster already!

Unfortunately, Furry is distracted by the tight new jeans my Cat is wearing. He keeps slowing down to check out the view from the rear or finding excuses to run his hand over her bottom. Finally, she smiles and bats his hand away and I dare to hope our progress might speed up a little.

But then my Cat turns to give him human kisses, the really close kind where you can’t see what, exactly, they’re licking. And they kiss and kiss for what seems like hours, ignoring me until I wrap my leash around their legs and pull hard enough to make myself gag.

Finally, my adorable humans notice that I’m turning blue and stop long enough to detangle themselves and apologize. I cut short my “it’s okay” licks to their hands to half my usual duration, but it still takes forever to get to the park. By the time Furry finally closes the gate behind us and unhooks my leash, I’m fit to burst.

I dash madly across the enclosure, leaping over a pair of unfamiliar bulldogs splashing each other in the water feature, and bound straight to Lucky’s favorite corner of the park. I scan the area, circle the stone fire hydrants, and sniff the ground near the gate where Lucky sometimes waits, but he’s nowhere to be found.

Spirits crashing, I sit down hard on the pavement, fighting the whimper rising in my throat. I’m so upset that my friend Phyllis doesn’t even need to sniff my bottom to determine my fragile emotional state.

Hang in there, kid,
she says, slapping my paw gently with her much larger one.
He’ll be here. He never misses a Sunday.

My brow furrows.
But what if his adorable human is sick? Or on a honeymoon? My humans went on a honeymoon and left me with Aunt Shane for ten days. I though they were never coming back!

Phyllis laughs and shakes her slightly damp red fur, sending droplets of water flying into the air.
There’s no honeymoon in
that
human’s future, sweetheart. Have you smelled that one? He’s had an ear infection for the past three months. Smells like something died in that big melon of his.

Maybe he doesn’t know,
I say, feeling compelled to stick up for Lucky’s adorable human.
You know our people have terrible noses.

I don’t know about that. But I do know something about you, little miss,
Phyllis says with a knowing look at my midsection.
The big question is, do your humans know yet?

Before I can answer, a joyful, miniature pincher bark echoes through the crisp fall morning. Seconds later, Lucky dashes into view, looking like eleven pounds, seven ounces of heart-stopping, well-groomed, deliciousness, and I can’t think about anything but him. I surge into motion, meeting him behind the largest stone fire hydrant, where we kiss and sniff and squirm with delight, proving my adorable humans haven’t cornered the market on effusive public displays of affection.

But it’s always been like that with Lucky. Since the day we met—moments after I ran away from Aunt Shane the day of my Cat’s wedding—it was love at first sight. And in just forty or fifty more days, there will be puppies with his brown eyes and my light fur, and I will be the happiest Chihuahua in Manhattan.

How are you feeling,
he asks, when we’ve finally settled down enough to keep our tongues off of each other.
I’ve been worried about you and the puppies.

We’re fine.
I wriggle closer to him, dizzied by the delicious smell of him.
I’ve never felt better.

But you should have been taken to the vet by now.
Lucky nuzzles my neck.
It’s been two weeks. I can’t believe your humans haven’t noticed that you’re expecting. What’s wrong with them?

I pull back with a smile, remembering my surprise.
Follow me and smell for yourself.

I lead the way across the park, swallowing my impatience when Lucky stops to politely sniff a few bottoms and inquire after the state of various friends’ humans and puppies. He’s a wonderful, loyal friend. It’s one of the many things I love about him, even when it makes getting somewhere take twice as long.

Finally, we arrive at the bench where my Cat and Furry are snuggled up, holding hands and gazing out at the Hudson River, talking non-stop, the way they usually do.

They never run out of things to say, do they?
Lucky observes with a smile.

I wag my tail proudly.
No, they’re wonderful together.

Like us.
Lucky says, but before I can kiss him for being so sweet, he lifts his nose higher into the air, and his ears shiver the way they do when he’s solving a scent mystery.

Well, well,
he finally says, his tail wagging, too.
Guess we have a lot of things in common. How long until their puppy arrives?

I don’t know,
I say honestly.
I only smelled the change in her scent a few days ago. I don’t think she even knows yet. But I’m so excited for them!
I stand on my hind legs, bouncing lightly on my toes.
I can’t wait for our puppies to be very best friends, just like my Cat and Furry and I are very best friends.

Lucky licks my face.
You’re the sweetest thing I’ve ever met. Or tasted. Or smelled.

I laugh, tempted to tease him for being so smitten. But in the end, I decide it’s more fun to kiss him and nip his neck and let him chase me around the park again and again until we’re both exhausted and ready for a nap in the shade.

When it’s finally time to go, I promise him that I’ll figure out a way to get my Cat to take me to the vet, swear the puppies will be fine, and kiss him a few dozen more times to give him enough kisses to last him until next Sunday. And as Furry leads me out of the gate and locks it behind him, I hear him tell my Cat that Lucky and I are the cutest little couple he’s ever seen.

My heart swells with happiness until I can’t help barking out everything I’m feeling. I tell my adorable humans that they are sweet and wonderful and that I’m so thrilled that they found each other and are in love and are having a baby to add to our family. But of course they don’t understand a word.