Spaceport West (9 page)

Charlie continued, “Look, Susan, in your speech you argued that we shouldn’t expect much in the way of surplus revenue from Mars for the foreseeable future. Is that really the position of your department? That’s not going to be an easy sell.”

Susan glanced at Ralph, whose expression was inscrutable. He raised his eyebrows and tilted his head questioningly. Susan turned back to Charlie.

“We can’t promise benefits before we know they are deliverable. I will not allow the Mars Colony to be held to ransom on purely monetary terms.”

“How would you like it to be held to ransom, my dear?” asked Ralph.

🚀

After the meeting, Minnie poured Susan a coffee.

“Minister, may I have a word?”

“Yes of course, Minnie, how can I help you?”

“Not here, ma’am.”

Susan was shocked to hear an android speaking in such a furtive manner.

“Okay, where then?”

She discreetly guided Susan to the Number 10 kitchenette. Minnie clicked her fingers and the other androids scurried out of the room, much to the Minister’s amusement.

“What’s the matter, Minnie, is it about the Prime Minister?”

Minnie started. “Yes, how did you know?”

“I have my own reasons for thinking something wasn’t right.”

“You don’t think Mr Hampton will suspect me of going behind his back?”

“Don’t worry Minnie, you’ve not given anything away. At least not yet. What is it you wanted to tell me?”

“I feel the Prime Minister may have put me in a rather delicate position.”

“Go on.”

“It’s… tricky. My loyalties are divided. I am of course fully committed to serving Mr Hampton, but my programming is not without ethical subtleties.”

“What has he asked you to do, Minnie? Is it to do with my MI7 file?”

“Yes! How did you know?”

“Don’t worry, the mainframe was instructed to notify me if anyone tried to access it. In any case, it was heavily redacted.”

“We managed to obtain the unedited file,” said Minnie guiltily, looking at the floor.

“Ah, that is disturbing. But there’s nothing in that file I’m ashamed of. Well, apart from that college party where we dressed as Tories and drank champagne from the poorer students’ Doc Martens.”

Minnie covered her mouth in abject astonishment.

“It’s okay,” said Susan, as she put her hand on Minnie’s shoulder, smirking.

“I’m concerned that Mr Hampton isn’t behaving very rationally, Minister. He doesn’t seem to trust anyone anymore, not even you. Do you know what he was looking for?”

“No I don’t, Minnie. If he’s feeling isolated perhaps he is trying to find out whether
I
can be trusted or not, what do you think?”

“I think you should have a word with Mr Hampton, ma’am, to reassure him. You two used to be so close, didn’t you?”

“Yes we did. That’s an excellent idea, Minnie. Thank you for this little chat. Now, I must let you get back to… whatever it is you do!”

🚀

Back in the Cabinet conference room, Ralph was sitting by himself flicking through his notes from the meeting, when Susan knocked and entered.

“Prime Minister, is now a good time?”

“Susan, my dear, for you anytime is a good time. What can I help you with?”

“I received an interesting message yesterday afternoon. From MI7.”

“Yes.” Ralph carried on looking at his notes.

“It was about my personal file, Prime Minister.”

“Oh?” said Ralph, finally looking up.

“Why were you looking at my file, Ralph?”

“It was probably someone in HR updating their records.”

“I’ve just spoken with Minnie. Now, don’t blame her, I made her tell me.” This wasn’t strictly true, and ordinarily Susan wouldn’t give two shakes about the feelings of an android, but she felt differently in this case. She wasn’t sure why.

“Oh, that. I just wanted to check something in your background. It was nothing sinister, I assure you.”

“What’s going on Ralph? The vote of no confidence today - it felt like a stitch-up. Do you want our space strategy to succeed or not? I need to feel I have your full support.”

“You know I fully support you, Susan, always have.”

“So nothing’s changed between us? Nothing’s happened to damage the trust between us?”

“Absolutely not!”

Susan felt some relief to hear Ralph say this, although, shouldn’t he have been more affronted? Never mind. Give him the benefit of the doubt, for now.

“Okay, now with regards to the Mars Colony,” Susan continued, “I’ve been receiving very mixed reports and I think it might be a sensible idea if I visit it myself.”

Again Ralph looked up from his papers. “Really, Susan? Is that absolutely necessary? You’d be away for months.”

“Well, I just think, ultimately I am responsible for the wellbeing and future of that colony. That’s a massive responsibility and if I’m not prepared to visit it in person, what does that say about my commitment?”

“I’m sorry Susan, I just can’t agree to that at the moment. I need you here. An absence of so long…” Ralph looked up at his portrait above the fireplace with a fearful expression. The painting looked down on him with a smug grin.

Finally he came back to Susan. “I’m not sure the Party would survive, to be completely honest.”

The Minister for Space once again found herself comforted by Ralph’s words, despite herself.

“Is that your final word on the matter?”

“I’m afraid it is Susan. Now, was there anything else?”

“Actually, there was one more thing, Ralph. Of a rather personal nature.”

“Go on.” Ralph looked Susan in the eye and tilted his head, this time at the precise angle which he calculated to be most caring. Susan was slightly put off by Ralph’s intense eye contact but ploughed on nevertheless.

“Did you ever receive your mediscan report? I’ve been expecting a copy for several months now.”

“Why were you expecting a copy Susan?”

“Because it was me who requested the scan from your doctor!”

“Ah yes. Well, anyway I did receive it. And there was nothing. To report, that is.”

“Right. Okay then.”

“Anything else?”

“Well, it’s just… would it be alright if I saw it, just to put my mind at rest?”

“That is a rather personal request Susan. Most irregular, I would say.”

“Well you saw my MI7 file!” Susan blurted out. She immediately felt rather childish for using this as an argument.

“That is true. Very well, I will arrange for a copy to be forwarded to you. Are we happy now?”

No, not entirely, Susan was thinking, but let’s wait and see what that mediscan throws up. Susan nodded, smiled, and left.

After Ralph heard the door click shut, he tapped on the intercom and said “Minnie, can I have a word please?”

“Of course, Prime Minister.”

A moment later Minnie trundled in and stood plaintively by Ralph’s chair.

“Can I ask you to shut down for a minute, I just need to apply some updates.”

“Of course, Prime Minister.”

Back on Mars, the general mood had taken a turn for the worse, as presaged by Tiggy.

“Hey Detroit, have you met the latest batch of recruits from Earth? Bunch of nutters!” began Sky, seating himself opposite his friend and clattering his breakfast tray onto the table.

“That’s what they said about us when we arrived,” replied Detroit.

“True. Calmed down a bit haven’t we? Model Mars citizens!” continued Sky.

“Oh yeah, especially Chet and Hamish,” said Detroit with a sarcastic air. “Stevie really didn’t deserve the humiliation they gave him last night. I actually think his playing is coming along.”

“That
was
a messy business. I hear they’ve found his missing limbs now, well most of them.” Sky toyed with his food unenthusiastically, and then looked up again. “Still, you’ve got to allow folk a bit of fun when off duty.”

“I guess. Everyone’s looking so rough at the moment,” commented Detroit, glancing furtively round the mess hall.

“Drinking home-brew every night tends to have that effect.”

“It’s not just the dodgy booze. We’re effectively running on emergency rations. Did you see the scrum that formed when the last container arrived? I thought it was going to turn into a full-on fist fight.”

“I found it weird though,” reflected Sky, “how quickly Matti and Bob materialised to film it…”

“It’ll make good telly I guess.”

“Perhaps
too
good, call me cynical. Anywho, I managed to get hold of that contraband I mentioned to you last week.”

“The freeze dried mango slices? Ah man I
love
that stuff!” enthused Detroit.

“Yep, my mate who works at the depot slipped it onboard, hidden inside a crate of space suit liners,” said Sky smugly.

“What’s the going price?” asked Detroit, leaning in.

It was Sky’s turn to look around furtively. “One slice will set you back five euro sterling.”

“What!” Detroit blurted out, causing several colonists to look round.

“Keep it down, Detroit, don’t want everyone knowing - there’s not enough to go round.”

“Sorry, but that’s ridiculous.”

“Times are hard, my friend. I mean, look what they’ve got you eating.”

Detroit glanced down at the food on his tray, which he had barely touched. This morning it consisted of half a bowl of dry Weetiebits and a salted herring, allegedly left over from an old ISS stockpile. Sky had a point. Surely things will improve though, won’t they? Detroit often tried to tell himself that things will improve, but increasingly, he was difficult to convince.

EURO STERLING

Successive British Governments have felt increasingly smug about the decision not to adopt the Euro Currency back in the 90s, as a result of the disastrous collapse of Sterling in September 1992. Subsequent eurozone financial crises in 2001, 2008, 2010-2015, 2016, 2017, and finally, 2018-2025 eventually forced the UK to move on from a warm and fuzzy feeling of
Schadenfreude
and actually do something to help out our feckless European neighbours.

The response? Simply to buy all remaining sovereign debt, at the time valued at some 2.7 trillion euros, for the remarkably reasonable price of 1p.

The practical upshot of which was the euro no longer existed as an independent currency, and was merely a rather minor denomination of the Pound Sterling. In order to prevent mass riots, unrest, and, in all probability, a land invasion, Britain, rather cannily, somehow managed to convince the populace of the EU that this was in fact a currency
merger
, and not an utterly humiliating bale-out after all. Hence the name euro sterling.

However, due to the somewhat asymmetrical nature of this ‘merger’, it was no longer possible for any meaningful trade to take place between the UK and the states formerly known as the eurozone, as in order to purchase, say, even one loaf of Tesco Value bread, your unfortunate European would somehow need to amass more old-style euro banknotes than were ever printed.

As a result, Britain effectively upped-drawbridge and said
au revoir
once and for all to our friends beyond the channel, diverting all import-export trade elsewhere. After all, it was reasoned, what did the Germans, Spanish or French export that we couldn’t easily produce for ourselves?

Clearly whoever was responsible for this policy hadn’t tasted British wine.

UK Guide to Space, 2025 Edition

After breakfast, Detroit joined Sian and Truth at the finally completed biome, to help plant out seedlings.

“Morning all,” Detroit drawled.

“Oh hi Detroit, thanks for coming down. We need all the help we can get today to get these babies growing,” said Sian, passing Detroit a tray of plants with an excitable twinkle in her eye.

“Yeah, it’s getting urgent, I am not eating any more of that powdered space junk,” said Truth, looking down at the miniature lettuce and tomato plants on her hover-trolley. “If these guys don’t come up with the goods, I’m on the next transport back to Blighty.”

“You wouldn’t leave us, would you Truth?” asked Sian, looking genuinely concerned.

“Yeah, don’t go, we need all the sane people we can get around here,” continued Detroit, “speaking of which, where’s Hamish? I thought he was on gardening duty today.”

“Haven’t you heard? No one has seen him after that little run in at the bar last night,” said Truth, “Rumour has it, he’s done a bunk.”

“What, caught the bus back home? That’s a neat trick.” Detroit chuckled at his own humour.

Truth glared at him and shook her head despairingly, before continuing. “Matti and Bob are filming a special edition about his disappearance.”

“What, already? I find those guys a bit shifty,” muttered Detroit.

“They’re just doing their job. They have to make this dive seem interesting to the punters back home. The TV show is what keeps us afloat,” Sian dryly pointed out.

“I’m just a bit suspicious of their methods. They are very quick to poke their nose in when something goes wrong.”

“True. I’ll be glad when their contract expires at the end of the show. We might get a bit more privacy,” said Truth.

“Okay, that’s the first row done. How are you getting on Detroit?” asked Sian.

“I can’t seem to get the hang of this planting tool. That little trigger, don’t you find it fiddly?”

“Nope, it’s just you!” Sian looked up at Detroit who was flexing his fingers painfully. “Why are your hands shaking?”

“Dunno. It’s been happening for the last week or so.”

“You should get that seen to, it doesn’t look right.”

“I had a mediscan. Looks like it might be symptom of the low gravity, or the air, or something.”

Sian glanced at Truth, who shrugged and carried on with her work.

“Look, Detroit, a couple of us are heading down to the sports module after this. We’ve started doing some extra training to see if that helps. You should come,” suggested Sian.

“To see if it helps with what?”

“You’re not the only one with some unexplained symptoms. Everyone’s suffering one way or the other,” Truth chipped in.

“I guess that’s a good idea. You realise though, the more training you do, the hungrier you’re going to get - they won’t increase your rations you know.”

“I’d be happy to lose a bit of weight,” said Truth, patting her stomach.

“Are you kidding? You ladies are looking
way
too skinny already. It’s not right.”

“What do you prescribe, Dr Finch? Three pints of Lager-than-Life
^tm
every night?”

“Works for me!” Detroit grinned.

Meanwhile, Matti and Bob were in the mess hall interviewing some of the colonists about Hamish’s mysterious disappearance. They had managed to persuade Dayzee Hiccup to be filmed.

“So Dayzee, what can you tell us about the incident last night at the Cantina?” began Bob.

“Well, Chet and Hamish were being a little boisterous. You know, they’d had a couple of drinks…”

“What happened to the android?” Bob interrupted impatiently.

“Stevie? Well, he was playing a rather nice version of
Across the Universe
, when those guys got up on stage and just started…” Dayzee broke off and started sobbing quietly.

“It’s okay, Dayzee,” said Bob, comfortingly.

“They just took him apart!” Dayzee began wailing uncontrollably.

Bob indicated to Matti that he should follow him to another part of the room.

“Let’s speak to Jenna Sorensen now. Jenna, you were the last person to see Hamish, weren’t you?”

“Yeah, I guess so. Chet said he was feeling a bit rough and headed off to the dorm, so I got chatting to Hamish, you know, trying to calm him down.”

“Calm him down?”

“Yeah, he was going on about his medical condition, the lack of proper food, stuff like that. He said he wasn’t sleeping well. He said he had a theory that Flinders was turning off the oxygen recycling system at night. He was just rambling really.”

“What happened next?”

“Well I said I’d walk him back to the dorm, but on the way, he ducked into the airlock and locked it. Through the window I could see him putting on a space suit. I tried to talk him out of it.”

“Out of what?”

“Well, he was in no fit state to go outside, it wasn’t safe. It’s against all regulations if you’ve been drinking. Anyway, he just vanished.”

“And you raised the alarm?”

“Yeah, and they sent an android search party.”

“Really? Why wasn’t a human search party sent?” Bob looked genuinely surprised, although you could never tell how sincere he was.

“After dark, that’s just the protocol. It’s too risky to send folk out, the temperature drops way down and there have been cases of suits failing…” Jenna broke off and started sobbing. In the background, Dayzee could still be heard crying loudly.

“So there we have it. An experienced colonist has disappeared in suspicious circumstances. More complaints about the food, and the general level of health and fitness here on Mars is taking a nose dive. We’re going to take a break now to hear from our sponsors, but we’ll be right back with our handy step-by-step guide to applying for admission onto the Mars training programme!”

Matti flicked off the camera and lowered it from his shoulder. Bob glanced back at Dayzee and Jenna.

“Come on Matti, let’s get out of here. I need a drink.”

🚀

Later on, Aster was sharing a GloopMatic with Jenna, trying to comfort her about the disappearance of Hamish. What could she say though? His survival chances were growing thinner by the hour.

“They may still find him. Alive, I mean.”

“By now, he’ll only have a couple of hours of oxygen left.” Jenna sulkily took a sip of her coffee.

“‘Please don’t give up hope,” Aster implored, giving Jenna’s hand a squeeze.

Just then, Chet and Zed drifted past.

“Hey, Jenna, I’m really sorry about last night…” began Chet.

“Oh don’t worry, it wasn’t your fault. I should have stopped him.”

“Look, it certainly wasn’t
your
fault,” said Zed, outraged.

“Thanks,” said Jenna, managing a half smile.

“Where are you guys off to anyway?” asked Aster.

“We’re going to speak to Flinders,” said Zed.

“About what?”

“Going home!”

“Seriously? It’s come to that has it?” asked Aster, astonished.

“It has for me,” said Zed.

“Yeah, and me,” agreed Chet. “If you’ve got any sense, you’ll think about it too, before it’s too late.”

The lads walked off purposefully.

“What do you think?” asked Jenna, turning back to Aster.

“I don’t know. It’s admitting defeat isn’t it? I’m not really ready to do that, not yet.”

“Staying here though… it is beginning to look a bit like a death sentence.”

“Yep, I know,” said Aster as she finished her drink with a grimace. “I’m going to go and have a word with Freddie about it. Thanks for our chat.”

“Thank you Aster, I feel much better now.”

“Good. Chin up!”

Aster wandered off to find Freddie. She wasn’t really sure what she was going to say to him. In truth, it still felt like Freddie was ignoring her, and had been ever since that business on the transport.

She tried the mess hall but he wasn’t there. She made her way to the male dorm. As she approached the doorway, she could hear Freddie talking to someone and her heart sank. Why can’t I ever get him to myself, she thought to herself.

As she coyly entered the dorm, Freddie glanced up and quickly put something under his pillow. There wasn’t anyone else in the room. Odd, thought Aster.

“Hey, Freddie, how’s it going?”

“Good thanks. I mean, as well as can be expected in the circumstances…”

“Yeah, that’s pretty horrible about Hamish. We need to look out for each other, don’t we?”

“I’m slowing learning that, despite myself.” Freddie smiled warmly at Aster. She felt hopeful, like perhaps she was growing on Freddie. She came and sat on the edge of his bed, hugging her knees to herself.

“So, how are you adjusting to the colony?” he asked.

“I’m doing okay. The desynchronosis is an ongoing issue, obviously.”

“Yep, that’s common ground for all of us I think,” said Freddie with a matter-of-fact grin.

“But generally I’m sleeping better.”

“No more nightmares?” asked Freddie.

“Nope, not a single one, amazingly. Still can’t quite believe it actually.”

“So, they started when you were a child, you said?”

“Yeah, I was about eleven or twelve I think.”

“Do you think something happened to trigger them?”

Aster furrowed her brow painfully and looked down.

“Oh, sorry mate, that was rude, I didn’t mean to pry.”

“No, really Freddie, it’s absolutely fine.” Aster looked into Freddie’s eyes and grabbed his hand, squeezing it really tight. He looked down at their hands.

Without letting go, Aster continued, “You know, nobody has ever asked me that before. Perhaps you are right, perhaps something did trigger them, but it feels like there’s a blank in my memory.”

She was looking intensely into Freddie’s eyes. He couldn’t have broken eye contact even if he’d wanted to. He was beginning to lose the feeling in his hand, but he realised he didn’t mind. He cared enough about Aster that he wanted to help her resolve this if he possibly could.

“Freddie, I think… I think I…”

Just then, Zed and Chet came back from seeing Flinders.

“Whoops, sorry guys!” said Chet, expansively.

Aster and Freddie released each other’s hands and moved apart slightly.

“Oh it’s fine we were just having a chat,” said Freddie. He glanced awkwardly at Aster who winked at him.