Soulful Strut (38 page)

“Hell, no. I can read the paper and get a job
by my damn self,” Candi said with a sneer.

“You screwed up.” Monette pointed at her.

“No, wait. We don’t know nothin’ about those
burglaries. We just—” Lenore stopped when Candi shot a heated
glance at her.

“Interesting you brought that up.” Monette
looked at her hard, until Lenore’s gaze dropped to the floor.

“Fine. Then kick us out of the program,”
Candi cracked back.

Monette stood over her. When Candi stood to
face her, Danica came from behind her desk and got between them.
Just then Kim knocked and came in. Her eyes widened as she looked
at Monette, then Candi. Lenore twisted her hands together
nervously.

“Calm down everyone,” Danica broke in before
Monette could speak.

Monette collected herself. She took a step
back and let out a slow breath. “I’m cool.”

“Come on, Lenore. Either we work for those
lame ass folks or we’ll find our own jobs. Either way we ain’t
worried’. You can’t say the same.”

“What does that mean?” Danica asked.

“Too bad about those newspaper articles,”
Candi smirked at Monette. “I’m sure you don’t want any more bad
publicity, like problems on your Cadillac helping us poor
unfortunates.”

“Get out,” Monette said quietly.

Once they were gone, Kim let out a shaky
breath and leaned against the door of Danica’s office. Monette had
clenched her hands into fists so hard that her fingernails had dug
into her palms. She forced her hands open and took in more air to
calm her rage. Danica shook her head slowly.

“What did she mean by your Cadillac?” Danica
glanced at Monette.

“Prison slang for an easy job. Most of the
residents do grunt work in low-paid jobs.” Monette could still
taste the bitterness that Candi had directed toward her. The
distance between them was greater than Monette had taken time to
recognize.

Kim jumped when someone knocked on the door.
She cracked it open, then let out a ragged sigh of relief when she
saw Danica’s secretary. She accepted the file folder from her.
“Thanks, Liz. Mr. Hargrove sent all the reports. The businesses in
the area formed an association so they share information,
especially about crime.”

“Let me see those.” Monette took the folder
and opened it.

“Okay. Kim, call the employers. Apologize,
but don’t make it sound like we think Candi or Lenore is involved.
You know what I mean,” Danica said.

“Right. Smooth things over and discourage any
talk that our participants are linked to those burglaries,” Kim
replied with a nod and hurried out.

“And try to find out if any reporters have
shown up,” Monette put in. She started for the door. “I’ll be in my
office looking over these.”

“I’m going to check on the other
participants. I’m hoping we don’t have a problem with them, too.
Monette, wait,” Danica said.

“Yeah.” Monette turned to face her.

“This isn’t your fault”

“I know it up here.” Monette tapped her
forehead. “But still. I’ll see you later.”

Monette went to her office. She spread out
seven separate police reports. She began to scan them one by one.
There were witnesses in only two of the burglaries. Of the seven
buildings that had been broken into, only one had security cameras.
Somehow the cameras had been disabled without anyone noticing, a
sign of an inside job. After fifteen minutes of reading, Monette
swore softly.

***

Later that evening Monette went through her
routine calmly at the halfway house. Since it was her turn to help
in the kitchen, Monette helped cook and later clean up. The other
women went off to either watch television or take part in a group
counseling session. Tyeisha and Lenore kept darting nervous looks
from Monette to Candi and at Yarva. Yarva gave off more arrogant
attitude than usual. Candi seemed more subdued. With true street
instincts, the other residents knew a fight was brewing. They
distracted the staff with banter. Finally Monette finished loading
the dishwasher. She saw Candi alone on the patio smoking a
cigarette. Candi did not acknowledge Monette’s presence for a time.
Finally she blew out a stream of smoke.

“You got something to say I guess,” Candi
drawled.

“Yeah. Tell me you didn’t have anything to do
with those burglaries.” Monette walked around to stand in front of
her.

“I didn’t have anything to do with those
burglaries,” Candi mimicked. “Is that all?”

“Hell no, that’s not all. Why, Candi? I tried
to help you out, and this is how you thank me. I—”

“You, you, you. Always gotta be about you.
You weren’t tryin’ to help me. It was all about you makin’ a name
for yourself, getting on the radio to brag. You and your bourgie
man.” Candi spoke in a gush of words, as though she’d been holding
them in too long. She glared at Monette for a few seconds, and then
looked away.

“That sounds more like Yarva talking. I
thought you had enough common sense and brains to make up your own
mind. Guess I was wrong.” Monette did not wait for an answer. She
was too tired to hear more. All she wanted was to be alone.

***

The next day Monette went through the motions
of getting out of bed, cleaning up and eating breakfast. The women
who had not left early for work or community service made small
talk around the table. They watched Monette closely. Janet came up
to her as Monette got more coffee from the large pot.

“You okay this mornin’?” Janet pulled the
lever and filled her cup. She stirred sugar into it“Fine.” Monette
went to the kitchen to avoid more talk.

Miss Inelle watched Monette move around the
kitchen doing cleaning chores. She hummed an old hymn under her
breath as she made a grocery list. Finally Miss Inelle sat down
with a sigh.

“Gonna be quiet around here today. I like
that. I’m not used to working the day shift. That new girl called
in again. Oh, well, more money for me.” Miss Inelle laughed.

“We need more of these antibacterial kitchen
towelettes.” Monette wiped down the countertops.

“Yeah. You got to look at any situation and
see the good in the bad. Sometimes things just work out right for
people.” Miss Inelle clicked her ink pen and added to the list

“Who?” Monette started loading the dishwasher
mechanically, her mind on Second Chances and what she would
eventually have to tell Danica.

“Just talking in general. About the way
things work.” Miss Inelle looked at Monette.

“Oh. Right.” Monette got the floor sweeper
out of the closet.

“Like I said, a lotta times what looks like a
bad break turns out to be a blessing.”

Monette put the sweeper away. “Thanks. I’ll
remember that.”

Sherrial came into the kitchen. “Monette,
come to my office for a minute.”

“Can we put off our session? I want to
prepare for my next radio show.” Monette did not feel up to mental
probing.

“It’s not that. The mail just came.” Sherrial
gestured for her to follow.

Monette sighed but went out behind her. Once
they were in her office, Sherrial handed Monette an envelope. The
Pardon Board seal caught Monette’s eye before she even read the
return address. Monette held it for almost a minute. An envelope
that weighed only a few ounces held her future. Sherrial leaned
against her desk and waited with patience. Finally Monette opened
it. As she read, Monette felt numb inside.

“Louisiana politics win again. The board
didn’t recommend a pardon. But the good news is I can reapply in
two years. Ain’t that great?” Monette started to rip the letter
apart, but Sherrial stopped her.

“Let me see.” Sherrial smoothed out the
sheets of paper. “I’m really sorry. Now start thinking about how
you can move forward.”

“Thanks, but I’m not in the mood for
therapy.” Monette waved away her attempts to social work the
situation.

Sherrial blocked her path to the door. “No,
I’m not going to let you spend time in self-pity.”

“I’ve got a lot on my mind right now. So just
let me work it out in my own way,” Monette said.

“How?” Sherrial persisted.

“I don’t know yet. Look, back off me a
minute. Everybody is demanding answers from me and I’m sick of it.
I can’t solve everything at once.” Monette went to the window and
stared outside.

“You’re feeling overwhelmed by the demands of
others right now, huh?” Sherrial went to her desk and sat on the
edge of it.

“My mother is always begging for money. Like
I can support every stupid thing they decide to do. My sister Rita
goes out and buys a car she can’t afford, and I’m supposed to pay
for it? I shouldn’t have sent them money in the first place.”
Monette rubbed her eyes hard.

“So you told your mother no.”

Monette nodded. “You can imagine how well
that went over. So much for family love. Then I stick my neck out
for Candi and—”

“And what?”

“Another mess I’ve gotta clean up. Damn, my
life is like one car wreck after another. But it’s my own
fault.”

Monette cried until her head began to ache.
She could not bring herself to talk about Jayson. No way did she
have a right to bring so much drama into his life, not to mention
how it could affect Lenae. At some point Jayson would be forced to
back away from her for Lenae’s sake. Not that she would blame him.
The thought of giving up the only good thing she had made Monette
cry even harder. Yet she knew in her heart it was the best for
Jayson.

Sherrial handed her a wad of tissues and put
an arm around her shoulder. She led Monette to the chair in her
office. “Multiple troubles are like twisted-up vines. Maybe we can
look at ways to hack away at them one by one.”

Trudy came in after only one knock. “Good
morning. Is everything okay?”

“Sure.” Monette wiped her face quickly and
turned away.

“No, it’s not,” Trudy said. She sat down in
the chair next to Monette.

“Monette’s request for a pardon was denied,”
Sherrial said when Monette didn’t answer.

“They considered my history, the fact that I
was with the guys who had drugs and that there was no confirmed
evidence that I was framed.” Monette struggled not to let more
tears fall and failed. When Trudy put a hand on her shoulder,
Monette clenched her teeth. “I don’t need pity right now.”

“The best thing you can do is think about the
future. You’ve got goals to work toward.” Trudy spoke in a crisp,
businesslike fashion.

“I gotta go. Thanks for the tissues and
sympathy.” Monette tossed the soggy wad into Sherrial’s small
trash- can and left.

“Hey, I passed my office management test,”
Tyeisha blurted out with a grin when she saw Monette. Then she
frowned as she studied Monette’s face. “What—”

“I’m fine. Just go on with your personal
celebration.” Monette went upstairs to her bedroom.

Seconds later Tyeisha came in without
knocking. “What’s up, Monette? C’mon now, tell me about it.”

Lenore joined them. “Something happen?”

“I appreciate y’all trying to help, but I’ve
got a radio show to prepare and a book to write. A little peace and
quiet will go a long way to help me out right now.” Monette took
out her AlphaSmart. She turned it on and started typing.

“Okay. If you’re sure,” Tyeisha said with a
glance at Lenore. She gestured toward Monette with her head. “I
gotta go to class.”

Monette looked up in time to see the signal
between them. “I don’t need a babysitter.”

“I don’t leave for my job until this
afternoon. We can talk.” Lenore waved Tyeisha out and sat down on
the bed. “Look, if this is about the program, don’t sweat it. Okay?
I went and apologized to my supervisor at the spa. We’re cool.”

“I appreciate it, Lenore. I really want you
to make it, you know?” Monette put a hand on her shoulder.

“Yeah, I do. And I don’t wanna disappoint
you.” Lenore smiled at her.

“No, this isn’t about me. Stick with the
training and school for
you
,” Monette replied with
force.

“Sure, and that’s what I told Ramone. Girl,
he dropped me two weeks ago. Said I was actin’ too uppity. Just
cause I’m tryin’ to better myself. There was a time I would have
been runnin’ after him. No more.” Lenore tossed her hair and sat
straight.

“Good for you. Don’t let anybody keep you
down.” Monette nodded. “Now go rest up before you take on managing
a busy spa.”

Monette found enough strength from somewhere
to smile at Lenore. She needed to stop thinking of herself, as
Candi said. Lenore had worked hard on learning basic business
skills to get a certificate from the community college. With that,
she had gotten a job as the manager of a local spa. Tyeisha was
also doing well and could get a store manager’s job soon. They had
succeeded in spite of Monette’s tendency to spoil everything she
touched.

Lenore started for the door but turned
around. “Follow your own advice, Monette. Don’t let nobody keep you
down. I know you can make it.”

They gazed at each other for a few minutes.
Monette wiped her eyes with the back of one hand. “Right. Now go on
so I can get some writing done, girl.”

Lenore seemed reluctant to leave as she
studied Monette. “I’m down the hall if you need me.”

“Thanks.” Monette went back to typing until
she heard the door bump shut. Then she tossed aside the AlphaSmart
and finished the crying she’d started in Sherrial’s office.

Chapter 19

On Monday, Monette did her show at the
station. She walked through her day doing tasks as usual, but she
felt in a daze. Jayson called her several times, and she even
managed small talk with him. By the time she went back to Second
Chances on Friday, Monette had come to some decisions.

Kim came to Monette’s office. “I e-mailed you
Candi’s termination letter. Did you review it?”