Sophie's Encore (32 page)

“Beautiful though it is, it shall have to come off,” he murmured. He slid his hand under my back to undo the clasp and tugged at the straps until he exposed my breasts.
There.
Lust was written all over his face, but he paused and examined me silently for a minute. I could feel a vein pulsing impatiently under the delicate skin of my suprasternal notch but I lay completely still, almost submissive. Abruptly, Dan discarded the redundant garment with a flourish so that it landed elegantly onto the sofa. Then he looked at me some more, drinking me in with his eyes.

My breathing grew ragged and shallow. The burst of air on my skin made my nipples harden and pucker, and they stood out proud and pink like little rose buds. Slowly and teasingly, Dan bent forward until his mouth hovered above my breasts. His eyes held mine all the while. I swallowed hard and licked my lips.

Dan moaned and licked his own lips. Then he inclined his head so his mouth could reach my nipples and his tousled hair fell on my face. I closed my eyes.

Lazily at first, Dan flicked his tongue over one, then the other nipple, alternating between the two until I pulled his head down and held him in place so he could have a good taste of one at a time.
More. I wanted more.

I shifted beneath him and raised my hips to meet with his loin. There it was, his delicious hardness pressed against me again but protected, as before, by two layers of jeans. I ground against it impatiently.

Dan got my meaning and ceased his nipple titillation. He sat back on his haunches. With a gentle, determined experience, he unbuttoned my jeans and pulled them down over my hips. His eyes searched mine;
is this okay?
I nodded, and the trousers came away completely.

“Yours, too,” I whispered, my voice surprisingly hoarse, and Dan obediently, if all too slowly, removed his own. His thick hardness sprang forth, hot and defined against the pale skin of his belly. I gasped and giggled.

“You went commando? On the coldest day of the year?”

Dan lowered himself down onto me, and his rock hard erection pressed against my naked abdomen. The shockwaves spread from the point of impact until it felt like I had red-hot lava coursing my veins. I grew dizzy with desire, my heart pounding fast and my breath echoing in my ears.

“Of course I didn’t go commando on the coldest day of the year,” my rock star breathed into my ear. “I…just felt a bit…needy earlier and…”

He didn’t finish his confession, but thrust himself inside me, almost brutally, then withdrew slowly, slowly, until I could feel my own moistness letting him go. I moaned in protest.

“Shh,” Dan soothed, then once more grasped one of my nipples between his teeth. He bit down just enough to hold it and tugged, tugged until I couldn’t take any more.

“Do it,” I begged. “Just do it. Do it now.”

In response, Dan placed his hand over my mouth to stifle my cries and finally entered me all over again, slower this time, with controlled determination, until I bucked and rose to meet him. We joined completely and lay down together, his manly weight overwhelming me, his hips grinding strong and powerful against mine. Stars exploded behind my closed eyelids and all awareness of my surroundings, of my past, my future, my present, faded into nothingness as wave after wave of pleasure rolled over me.

Chapter Forty-Eight

“Are you okay? You look…different. Like the cat who had the cream.” Rachel held me at arm’s length and observed me critically. “You’re positively radiant. There’s a certain glow to you. I
know
that glow. Have you—”

Her eyes widened and she drew in a breath, swiveling her gaze from me to Dan and back again. Dan, I noted, looked studiously casual.
Bad tell
.

“How’s about you let us in,” I suggested as it was still snowing and freezing cold. “Happy Boxing Day!” I gave her a quick peck on the cheek and pushed past her to get into the warmth.

“I’ll speak to you later,” she threatened, then stood back to let Dan and the kids in.

Rachel’s house was a funfair of bright Christmas decorations hung in unusual places. I bumped my head on several ornaments as I was walking through the hallway, and Alex smiled apologetically.

“They’re hung low so Henry can see them,” he greeted me, hugging me and planting a mulled-wine scented kiss on my cheek.

“Oh…right.” I resisted the urge to smack myself on the forehead and reminded myself that I, too, had once been a new parent trying to pander to my infant’s every cognitive need. “Good idea.” I smiled and sidestepped another low-hanging seasonal implement on my way to the kitchen.

Alex poured me a mug of mulled wine, and Dan and Rachel joined us. There was a short awkward silence as us four adults stood around contemplating each other, but then the oven timer went off and Rachel sprang into action.

“I made a gammon joint,” she explained. “Everyone loves ham, right?” We nodded our assent and she continued assembling the meal.

“It’s been such a long time since we’ve seen you properly. So glad you could make it.” She stopped in her food preparation and raised her mug. “Happy Christmas.”

“Happy Christmas,” the rest of us chorused, and I offered to help with the food while the men laid the table.

All through the afternoon, I caught Rachel looking at me when she thought I wouldn’t notice, and she would smile indulgently, like a mother hen who is watching her chick take off for the first time. Once or twice, she went on a fishing expedition, but I didn’t take the bait, and Dan deflected her not-so-subtle questions like a Teflon shield.

“I think Sophie quite enjoyed sleeping in her new guest bed,” he answered deadpan when Rachel asked if we had spent a
nice night
together. What he didn’t add was that he had enjoyed it, too. And when Rachel went all out, declaring that there was a definite aura of
lurve
around us, Dan toasted her back. “There certainly is, my sweet. To
lurve
and the magic of Christmas.” He winked at me over his glass, but this little clue Rachel failed to notice.

At the end of the day, Dan took us back to his house as though it was the most normal thing in the world. I hadn’t planned on a stay this long, and we were all running low on clothes, so Dan offered to stuff everything in the washer and have it dry by the morning. “I suppose I could drive you to your house,” he said, “but truth be told, I really don’t want to. It’s too cozy in here, and I’m too lazy.”

Needless to say, the kids loved going back to Dan’s house and all their new toys, and for the next few days, we once again led a quasi-family existence. Dan and I were physically addicted to each other as if making up for lost time, which, in a way, we were. Nothing was said, nothing was discussed, the ‘L’ word wasn’t mentioned by either of us, but it was present at all times, and we both knew it. It was as if, by mutual unspoken agreement, neither of us wanted to break the spell we had magically found ourselves under again.

By New Year’s Eve, Dan and I couldn’t even be bothered to keep up a separate bedroom charade for the kids. They saw us hug and kiss—gently, on the lips only—and they responded well to this new level of connection between me, their mummy, and Dan, their…godfather. In fact, ‘responded well’ didn’t quite capture it. They were positively blossoming with the attention lavished upon them by Dan.

I couldn’t quite put my finger on it, but they seemed calmer, somehow, less clingy, less in need of constant reassurance. Or perhaps that was an illusion created by the simple fact that there was somebody other than me they could lean on, and therefore, they didn’t rely on me quite so much.

Having learned the hard way to take life as it came, I refused to overanalyze these developments or fret about the consequences when Dan would disappear on tour in January. We hadn’t discussed this subject in great length yet, but we didn’t need to. It was clearly marked on the Tuscq-themed calendar for the coming year that had appeared in the kitchen during our Christmas stay.
U.S. Tour
started on January second and ran all the way into April. I knew that because I had checked when Dan wasn’t looking. And even then, I had refused to let my heart sink. This was how it was, how it would be, always.

“Isn’t it funny how life alters your perception of things?” I challenged myself while I was brushing my teeth the night I found out about the impending tour. “You turned Dan down because of exactly this…and now you’re living it anyway.” I offered a wry smile to my reflection in the mirror.

How true that was. All those years ago in Paris, after Dan had proposed, I had imagined what our life would be like, and I had concluded that I couldn’t cope with all the absences. “Although,” I pointed out, stabbing my toothbrush in the air triumphantly, “I always assumed there would be infidelity.” Imagined adultery on Dan’s part had been the definite deal breaker, back then.

“But there most categorically isn’t, now.” I whispered this last part, struck by a sudden realization. Yes, Dan had had many other women while I had known him. He
had
been a serial womanizer and had never made a secret of it. Yet, while I had featured in his life, while I had a starring role, there hadn’t been a single transgression. Well, all right, there had been
one
, in Paris, after he proposed and before he knew my answer. But he was younger then, and anyway, that was water under the bridge. The point was, since he had looked after the Jones family of three, he had not had a girlfriend. The other women had simply vanished.

How come I hadn’t noticed this before
? Suddenly, I had to hold onto the sink for support. I could deal with absences. I could deal with tours and recording and performances. I would talk the children through it, make them understand that Dan’s spells away from us were only temporary. I had always known I could figure all that out as long as he was
mine
. And it seemed like…he…just
might
be. Maybe. If I didn’t mess it up all over again.

My hands shook so badly I couldn’t finish brushing my teeth, so I rinsed my mouth out instead. Now that I had the knowledge, what would I do with it?

“You all right?”

Dan’s voice startled me. I hadn’t heard him come in and I jumped, sloshing water all over me. Dan snuggled into my back, wrapping his hands around my waist, resting his head on my shoulder to peer at me in the mirror. I laughed.

“I’m fine. I was just…I didn’t hear you come up the stairs.” I broke eye contact and shifted my body. I hadn’t quite recovered from my blinding insight yet, and I certainly wasn’t ready to share.

He turned me around and enveloped me in his arms again.

“I’ve had the most magical time.” He nuzzled my neck, and I could feel him getting excited.

“Me, too,” I agreed. Unspoken words hung between us, and Dan kissed their weight away.

“Tomorrow is New Year’s Eve,” he whispered in between planting kisses all over my face.

“I know,” I giggled.

“Will you come to the show?”

I pulled back, scrutinizing his face. He had mentioned the New Year’s Eve show when he first came back from his stay in Devon, and I had duly filed the knowledge for future reference, wondering whether I could, whether I
should
go. Of course I wanted to,
but
. And there were the kids to consider…

Dan mistook my hesitation for concern. “It’s only a half-set,” he told me once again. “I’m not going to overdo it. It’s a short hour, and it’s a small venue we’ve booked for an invitation-only gig in Covent Garden. It’s not like a massive arena...”

I placed my finger over his lips. “I know all that,” I reassured him. “I just…I’d love to come. I’ll see if I can get a sitter.”

Dan recoiled in horror, his eyes as wide as saucers. “
No!
”

For the second time in ten minutes, I jumped. Dan was contrite. “Sorry, that came out a bit loud. But no, don’t hire a sitter. Bring the kids.”

My turn to recoil. “Bring the kids? To a licensed venue? They’re only two and four. I’ll get done for…something. Plus it’ll be too noisy.” Emily became very distressed when exposed to loud noise of any kind.

“You can sit in the private family area. And they can wear earplugs or…” He grinned, suddenly. “I know! Joe figured this out years ago for his own children. They can wear those little cute kids’ earmuffs and they’ll be just fine. They come in pink, blue, or yellow…” He petered out, and I laughed.

“You do know your way ‘round a child’s mind these days,” I commented. “Kids’ earmuffs, indeed. They might work, though.”

I scratched my head, feeling excitement bubbling inside me. It would be
awesome
to see the show and take the kids along. They had never really seen Dan in action.

“And you’re sure that’s okay?”

Dan nodded. “No problem. I’m fairly sure Joe and Mick will bring their kids, too, and…” He waved a hand to stave off my obvious comment. “I know they’re a little bit older, but it’s going to be all right. And if it all goes horribly wrong, I’ll have a limo ready to take you home.”

Ah. Now there was a thought.

“Speaking of…what happens after the gig? I mean…” I caught myself, twiddling with my hair, uncertain how to proceed. This was the tricky territory I had always been worried about. I didn’t want to sound like a whiny wife. But I did want to know whether Dan would be coming home with us, or shortly after us, or whether he would be out partying all night.

Dan planted a kiss on my nose. “Sweetie, you are so cute when you’re trying to be cool. In the past, as you well know, we used to do an all-night show with a party lasting into the New Year.”

“Uh huh. I know.”
That was why I was asking
. I recalled the gig Steve and I had attended together, the one where Dan had conned me onto the stage to sing. That seemed a lifetime ago.

“But things are different this year for obvious reasons. And afterwards, everybody’s doing their own thing. I suspect the rest of the band will disappear off home, too. You know, what with the tour and the traveling…” He shook his head, realizing too late we hadn’t discussed that yet. “Anyway,” he ploughed on swiftly, “I’ll come back with you after the show. We’ll all come here, you, me, and the kids. He pulled me close and held me tight. “What do you think?”