Wilhemina inhaled deeply and shuddered with relief in Katie's arms. She felt so confused and afraid, but she didn't want to leave Douglas. She breathed again and a little of the tight heavy feeling in her chest lifted.
Katie patted her on the back and urged Wilhemina toward the kitchen. “Come on. A drink of water will make you feel better. You sit down,” she said, pointing to a chair.
Pulling a glass from the cabinet, she filled it with water and a few cubes of ice. She lifted her lips in a sympathetic smile and sat across from Wilhemina after she gave her the glass. “You know you haven't known him very long at all,” Katie said
“Yes, but he's different than anyone I've ever met,” Wilhemina told her, wanting desperately for her to understand. “He thinks I'm pretty. He doesn't think I'm stupid. And he didn't know who my father was. He just really wanted me,” she said, her voice breaking slightly. She took a quick sip of water. “Me. He wanted me,” she said, still almost unable to believe it.
“But, Wilhemina, how can you possibly really know him after just a few days with him?”
“I know he's been so kind to me. I know he's good.”
“That is really good, but it's not everything. I know this is going to be hard for you to hear, but you and Douglas are from different worlds and that's part of the attraction. I think the novelty of being a hog farmer's wife will be likely to wear off.”
“I can't imagine getting bored with Douglas,” Wilhemina insisted.
“What about when he gets extra busy with the farm? What about when he gets tired of cooking and taking care of the hogs?” She sighed. “I'm glad Douglas has been kind to you. I'm glad you've had a good experience with him, but, Wilhemina, you can't avoid the fact that you are from totally different worlds. You're like a princess, and Douglas is—”
“Don't call him a commoner.”
“I was going to say that Douglas knows nothing of your world.”
Wilhemina bit her lip, refusing to give up. “He knows about my heart, and that's what's really important” She swallowed over her nervousness, “I'm not leaving him. Not yet.”
Not ever.
Katie patted her hand. “Just take a breath. We can talk about this later. I-uh-should probably better go and let Michael know we won't be leaving right away.” She patted her hand. “You'll be okay, Wilhemina.”
Wilhemina blinked to keep from tearing up again. “You don't understand what it's like to need somebody, Katie. You're so strong. You just don't understand what it's like to find someone and want to be with them more than anything.” Wilhemina watched a flash of vulnerability cross Katie's face, an expression of longing so deep it made her look twice. But Katie glanced away. “You're stronger than you think,” she said. “We can talk later.”
Wilhemina watched her rise from her chair and walk to the front door. She waited to hear Michael's voice, knowing he would be angry. The thought of it made her want to hide. Katie mercifully closed the door behind her and left Wilhemina alone with her thoughts and the feeling that she was still on borrowed time.
Katie nearly walked straight into Michael as she stepped outside the front door. His jaw was tight and his gaze watchful.
“Why isn't Wilhemina out here with her luggage?”
Katie tugged him down the front steps to the rental car. “This may be a little more difficult than we anticipated.”
“What?”
She lowered her voice. “She thinks she's in love with Douglas.”
“What?”
Katie winced. “Keep your voice down. She's freaked out enough as it is.”
His nostrils flared as he inhaled slowly. “Let me get this right. Just because this hog farmer has been keeping her in bed since they first met, she thinks she's in love. You told her there's a difference between marrying love and fun sex, didn't you?”
Katie's stomach tightened. She couldn't help wondering if she fell into the fun sex category with Michael. Which should be totally okay. “I didn't put it exactly that way, but I did convey the message.”
“And?”
“And she's not ready to leave. She thinks she's in love with him.”
“She thinks he is her cowboy knight,” he said, cynicism making his voice edgy.
“She didn't say that,” Katie said, trying to figure out how to manage the situation. “I can't totally blame her for not wanting to go back to Philadelphia. She hasn't fit in there at all.”
He shot her a wary look. “You're not seriously considering letting her stay.”
“No, but none of this is feeling right at the moment.”
“Feeling right? I think you'd better explain.”
“I mean, what if Wilhemina is really in love with Douglas? She's happy here. Is it really right for us to drag her back to Philadelphia where she's miserable and doesn't fit in?”
Michael shook his head. “Have you forgotten your agreement with Ivan? My agreement with Ivan? Have you forgotten the money?”
“No, and I know I need the money more than you do.”
“That's a matter of opinion.”
“You want the money for your ego. I need the money for a deaf child.”
He narrowed his eyes, his anger visible in the set of his jaw. “You think this is about my ego. It's about honor. My honor.”
“Well, what kind of honor is there in dragging Wilhemina away from her chance at love?”
Michael rolled his eyes. “Lord save me from the romantic insanity of women. For one thing, the distinction between true love and sex is a little murky here. Have you forgotten that the reason we're down here is because of that little fairy tale you told Wilhemina?”
His words dug under her skin….
distinction between true love and sex is a little murky…
“What makes you the expert on the distinction between love and sex? From everything you've said and done, you're only an expert on sex.”
He stared at her, then gave a short, humorless laugh. “I'm not sure if I should thank you for complimenting me for being an expert on sex or if I should ask you if you're comparing Wilhemina's relationship with Doug to ours.”
Katie felt hot with embarrassment. She hated that he had nailed her concerns so easily. She glanced away. “I wasn't talking about us, so—”
“If you are comparing our relationship, I think you might want to bear in mind that we have both fought it, and continue to fight it. We both know more about each other than we want the other to know, but in a weird way, you trust me and I trust you. You would also be right if you said I want you in bed like I've never wanted anyone, but I'll be damned if I'll push you. Maybe it's ego. Maybe it's, something else but I want you to come to me one hundred percent willingly.”
It was her tarn to blink. The intensity of his words and his gaze stung her from head to toe.
“Nothing to say?” he asked, his voice filled with an edge of rough emotion and need.
That same emotion and need echoed inside her. But she was way out of her depth and too much of a scaredy-cat to admit it. Unable to tear her gaze from him; she swallowed and shook her head.
“Didn't think so,” he muttered and swore. “This is looking worse than the
Titanic.
Ivan will come back and after he destroys you and me, he'll rip into Wilhemina. If she has the insane nerve to defy him and stay with Douglas, can you imagine what Ivan will do to a hog farmer?”
Katie shuddered at the image. “Do you really think Ivan would bother with a hog farmer?”
Michael looked at her as if several of her mental light-bulbs were missing. “If his daughter was involved. Have you forgotten his feelings about rednecks?”
Katie felt a deep ripple of uneasiness. “This is going, to be difficult.”
“Unless we just put Wilhemina in the car and leave. She's been brainwashed by sex.”
“I wish you would quit saying that. I was a virgin before last week too.”
“Yes, but I haven't succeeded in brainwashing you.”
“How do you know you haven't?”
“Because you haven't used the condom you took from the box.”
Katie felt her cheeks heat. “How did—”
“I counted.”
She hated that he knew so many of her secrets. “We're getting off the subject of Wilhemina. We can't treat this like some kind of cult intervention. She's going to have to reach the right conclusion on her own.”
“Fat chance with Douglas banging her every other—”
Katie lifted her hands to cover her ears. “Stop.” She breathed in and exhaled slowly, then met Michael's gaze. “I'll talk to her later this afternoon.”
“Why not now?”
“Because she's all worked up. This will give her a chance to settle down enough to hear me. If we're lucky.”
Michael scowled. “Luck,” he echoed, then broke off when his cell phone rang. He pulled it from his pocket, glanced at the incoming caller ID number, and shook his head. “Michael Wingate,” he said into the receiver and paused. “How is she physically?’’ he asked, and waited: “Is she on suicide watch?” he asked, then sighed. “I'm out of town and I can try to see her within the next two days. Make sure you tell her that. Connect me with her and I'll tell her the same, but I think you need to put her on watch until I can get there. I'll hold while you transfer.”
Michael looked at Katie and the ghosts in his eyes tore at her. “Hey, Mom,” he said. “I hear you're having a rough spell.” He nodded as he listened in silence. “I can't come see you today and probably not tomorrow, but I'll try to come the next day?’ He paused again and sighed. “I can't, Mom. I'm in Texas. Two days. I'll be there in two days.” He raked his hand through his hair. “Two days,” he repeated. “Chin up. You'll be okay. I love you, Mom.” He punched the power button and jammed the phone back in his pocket.
“Does that happen often?” Katie asked.
He shrugged. “She has a lot of breaks with reality. Sometimes it's harder for her when she remembers what really happened and that she has a son. She starts to panic. By the time I see her, she may not remember who I am.”
Her heart hurt. She wondered what it was like for him for his mother to be technically alive, but so unreachable. “How soon after your father died did she get sick?’’
“She had several episodes, but her family committed her about two years after my father killed himself. Even though I was only ten, I always felt like I should have been able to make things different.”
“You felt responsible,” she said. “You weren't. And you're not now. And I'm betting you don't want to talk about it anymore.”
“That would be right,” he said. “My mother gets enough psychoanalysis for ten people. She can have my share.”
Katie laughed. “Sounds kinda like something I said.”
“What?” he asked, curiosity lighting his eyes.
She shook her head. “No. It's an inside joke.”
“With whom?”
“Inside me.”
“Stingy.”
“Maybe. So what are you going to do now? Go back to the trailer and work?”
“Guess so,” he said, eyeing the house with a dark expression and walking toward the trailer. “Since Wilhemina's in crisis.”
“I'll talk to her in a while.” She walked beside him.
“What are you going to do in the meantime?”
“Go swimming,” she said, knowing, she was treading on dangerous ground. She should allow Michael to find his solace in his work. He'd obviously been doing that for some time and it had worked. That should be fine with her, but it wasn't. She knew what it was like to want to just take off and do something fun to forget her problems. Every once in a while she allowed herself to go do something crazy. Sometimes you have to do something a little crazy to keep from going crazy. This might be the craziest yet, she thought as she looked into his dark eyes.
He gave her a double take. “Where?”
“There's a pond beyond the trailer.”
“I didn't know you brought a bathing suit with you.”
“I didn't,” she said and let him chew on that while she walked in front of him.
“
Love makes us do amazing, wonderful things…and really stupid things too.
”
—S
UNNY
C
OLLINS'S WISDOM
S
he tore his heart out and stomped that sucker flat when she didn't go skinny-dipping.
Michael followed Katie from a distance as she shucked her tennis shoes, but not her shorts and T-shirt. There was no way he was going to glue himself to his computer screen after she dropped her little bomb. The sun shone on the water and her hair bounced in a ponytail pulled high on her head. In his mind's eye, he could see her as a child, eager to wash away whatever was bothering her by taking a swim. He'd done the same a few times when he'd had the opportunity.
Katie walked to the edge of the pond and turned around with her hands on her hips. “Are you just going to stand there and watch or are you going to join me?”
Smart mouth woman. It would serve her right if he let her stand there and yell while he hiked back to the house.
“Are you afraid you can't beat me in a race, city boy?”
She was obviously goading him. It was working. Michael strode to the lake and pulled off his shirt, then started on his belt.
Katie's eyes widened. “You're not taking off your pants.”
“I can't race in slacks,” he said, pulling down the zipper.
“But—but—” She turned to the lake and jumped in.
Michael laughed when she surfaced with her head turned firmly away from him: “Who's afraid now?”
“I'm not afraid,” she said vehemently; “I just didn't think you would take off—”
“Everything,’’ he finished for her, then jumped into the water wearing just his boxers unbeknownst to her. He surfaced and swam to her side. “Just because I'm a city guy doesn't mean I've never been skinny-dipping.”
She gave a double take. “Oh, really. When did you—” She broke off as if she realized her curiosity had gotten away from her. “Never mind.”
“You forgot. I told you one of my aunts lived in the country and they had a pond.”
She tossed him an assessing glance “How long since you've been swimming?”
About a week since he'd visited the gym. He shrugged. “I haven't been dunked in a pond in years.”
She smiled. “Race you to the other side and back?”
“I'll give it my best shot.”