Soldier On (6 page)

“I’m an only child. Mom lives in a small town just outside of Indianapolis.”

“What about your dad?”

I take a deep breath and stare down at my hands. It’s not that I mind talking about my father. I just never know how to explain it.

“I never met my dad. He was killed in Desert Storm before I was born.”

Brandon reaches for my hand.

“I didn’t know that. I’m sorry, Steph.”

“Thanks.” I squeeze his hand. “You know, they say it’s hard to miss something you never had, but
they
are full of it. I miss my dad every single day.”

“I understand. It must make you proud, though. Knowing he died defending his country.”

I bristle. It’s the same speech I’ve heard all my life. Some families probably find comfort in the fact that their loved ones died in combat. I’ve even had people tell me that I should consider it an honor.

I guess I’m selfish. I’d rather have my dad.

“Could we maybe talk about something else?”

Brandon nods and gives my hand a squeeze.

“Sure,” he says. “I know! Let’s talk about our first date. Is tomorrow good for you?”

I can’t help but laugh. “I thought this was our first date.”

“Absolutely not.
This
is muffins and water. First dates are supposed to be epic. It’s the story we’ll tell our children, and our grandchildren—”

“You know, you’re pretty confident for a guy who wears a paisley apron.”

He grins. “Tomorrow night. You, me, and my old VHS copy of
The Princess Bride
. I’ll kick the guys out of the apartment, and we’ll order a pizza.”

“How about my apartment, my DVD, and I’ll beg Tessa to cook?”

His dimpled smile melts my heart.

“It’s a date.”

CHAPTER FIVE

Stephanie

Tessa meets me at the door. “You’re home! How was your date?”

I stumble inside and drop my bag before hobbling toward the couch. “It wasn’t a date, according to Brandon. It was muffins and water. But you’ll be happy to know that our first official date is tomorrow night. And we’re staying in, so if you don’t mind, would you care to—”

“No problem. Xavier has a game.”

“You’re the best friend ever.”

Her happiness fades. “I . . . really hope you still think so after I tell you what I need to tell you.”

I’m instantly suspicious. I also notice her apron and a distinct aroma in the air.

“You’re baking peanut butter cookies.”

“Well, I know they’re your favorite.”

“Okay, what’s going on?”

“I really wanted to feed you first.”

“You can feed me later. Spill it.”

She sits down next to me. My beautiful best friend, who never loses her cool or gets nervous about anything, looks a little pale.

“Steph, you know you’re my best friend and that I would never, ever do anything to intentionally hurt you, right?”

“Which means you’re about to hurt me.”

“But not intentionally.”

“Just spit it out, Tessa.”

Taking a deep breath, she squares her shoulders and looks me in the eye.

“Xavier asked me to move in with him, and I said yes.”

“Tessa, that’s amazing! But why would . . .” my voice trails off as I realize how this news, as wonderful as it may be, could unintentionally hurt me. “Ah, the apartment. You want me to move out?”

Tessa’s eyes grow wide. “No, of course not! His parents just bought the apartment building on Pike Street. The fancy one. You know, the place with the private terraces and fitness center?”

“You mean the one we call Paradise on Pike?”

“That’s it! Xavier’s allowed to live there rent-free as long as he stays in school, and his mom and dad love me, so they’re all for it.”

Tessa and Xavier have been dating since sophomore year, so moving in together isn’t a complete shock. What’s a little upsetting is the fact that they chose
now
to do it. It’s just a few weeks into the semester—the first few weeks of their
last
semester—and they decide to make this kind of commitment now? After Tessa and I just made a commitment to our landlord in the form of a six-month lease?

“Steph, I know what you’re thinking. I had every intention of staying through the summer. No one was more surprised than me when he asked me to move in with him.” Tessa’s eyes suddenly fill with tears. “I know it’s selfish. You don’t hate me, do you?”

With a sigh, I reach for my best friend and give her a tight hug. “It’s not selfish and of course I don’t hate you. I’m so happy for you. I’ll just have to see if our landlord will let us out of our lease.”

“You don’t want to stay?”

“I can’t afford the rent on my own.”

Tessa frowns. “I know. I was thinking maybe you could find a new roommate. It would just be for a few months. I’ll even help you look. It would help relieve my guilt.”

“Don’t feel guilty. I’ll post an online ad or something and see what happens. Either way, it’ll be fine.”

“Promise?”

It will be fine or I will be homeless. No worries.

I force a smile. I’m not about to let the ball of anxiety that has just formed in the pit of my stomach ruin my best friend’s excitement.

“I promise.”

A sudden knock causes Tessa to beam brightly. I don’t even have to wonder who is on the other side of the door.

“Come in,” we yell in unison.

Xavier walks in slowly, cautiously, as if he’s afraid a wild animal is on the loose. His eyes widen when he sees Tessa’s tears.

“Do you hate us?” he asks.

I force another smile. I have a feeling I’ll be doing that a lot over the next few days.

“How could I hate my two best friends?”

Xavier sighs with relief and plops down on the sofa.

We spend the rest of the evening with take-out pizza, peanut butter cookies, and some basketball game that I couldn’t care less about. Deep down, I felt a little guilty. They’re in love, and it’s not surprising that they want to be together all the time. I’m happy for them, but at the same time, all I can think about is the fact that I will soon be sharing the sofa with a complete stranger.

Or you’ll be homeless.

I wait until halftime before faking a headache and dragging my depressed ass to bed.

The next morning is cloudy and gloomy, which is ironic considering those two words perfectly describe my mood.

To say this is the worst day for a first date is the understatement of the year.

Throughout the morning, I seriously consider texting Brandon and faking the flu, but something stops me. The fact is that I like him. A lot. Which is weird because it usually takes me much longer to feel comfortable around someone. Tessa found the perfect guy in Xavier, but I’ve never been lucky when it comes to dating. Most college guys are jerks. Or liars. Or both.

Brandon is different. Instinctively, I know this, and that’s what stops me from breaking our date.

I’ve spent the afternoon on the couch with my laptop, scrolling through ads on Peyton Central, our school’s equivalent to Facebook. Students can check e-mail, sell used textbooks, browse for campus internships, and sometimes, find a new roommate.

So far, I’m unimpressed.

Oh, there are plenty of eager hopefuls. Some even posted pictures. And while my 80s-loving heart is impressed with the ad that reads, ‘Seeking roommate who likes to watch
Back to the Future
and listen to old school Mellencamp,’ I just can’t help but think the crafty bastard, whose name is BigDaddy21, is probably just looking for a girlfriend.

Giving up, I close my laptop and head to the kitchen to finish dinner. Tessa made lasagna, so the apartment already smells like heaven. As I place the garlic bread in the oven, the depressing thought hits me that, very soon, I’m going to be cooking my own meals.

I have a feeling there’s going to be a lot of take-out in my future.

The knock at the door jerks me right out of my pity party. I limp my way through the living room and open the door.

“Hi.”

“Hey.” He’s wearing his Inigo Montoya T-shirt and holding a pretty bouquet of wildflowers. He looks a little nervous. “Umm . . . I couldn’t decide between these and roses, but my dad always said that you should bring flowers to a girl any chance you get, so I’m . . .”

He’s babbling, and it’s adorable. I decide to put him out of his misery and reach for his hand, pulling him inside.

“Wildflowers are my favorite.”

His face immediately relaxes. “Yeah?”

“Yes.”

I lead him into the kitchen, where I find a vase and fill it with water. “This was really sweet of you. Thank you.”

Over dinner, we talk about school. I’m surprised to learn his schedule is just as horrible as mine, and just like me, he has to graduate in May. Summer classes are not an option.

“I just want to be done. One last summer of freedom before I start teaching.”

Brandon nods. “I understand. I’m headed to Georgia right after I graduate.”

Before I can ask what’s in Georgia, he asks about my future plans.

“I really want to teach English.”

“Here?”

“Anywhere. Hopefully close to home, but I’ll go wherever there’s a job.”

Dinner is delicious, of course, and we each send a quick text to Tessa to thank her for cooking before we head to the living room. I pop the DVD into the player and hand him the remote.

He pulls me toward the couch. “Do you cry?”

“What do you mean?”

“You know, when Westley supposedly dies, or when Buttercup marries Prince Humperdinck. Do you cry?”

“She doesn’t technically marry him, if you remember.”

Brandon chuckles and helps me get comfortable on the sofa. My ankle doesn’t hurt nearly as much now, but he insists I prop it up anyway.

For the next ninety minutes, we watch our favorite movie as if it’s the very first time. It
feels
like the first time, because I’m watching it with someone who truly loves it as much as I do. During the movie, our bodies drift closer, until Brandon finally takes my hand while wrapping his other arm around me. I snuggle deep into his arms without taking my eyes off the television.

It should be weird, but it’s not.

“I could never go out with someone like Buttercup,” Brandon says in the middle of the movie. “She has no faith whatsoever.”

I laugh. “Well, I could never date someone who disappears for years and lets me believe he’s dead.”

“So, who could you date?”

You.
The thought is immediate. Thankfully, it remains a thought and the word doesn’t escape my mouth.

“Let’s just watch the movie, okay?”

He smirks and turns his attention back to the screen.

“I have to admit . . . I sort of want to punch Westley in the face every time he says ‘as you wish.’ I never understood why he couldn’t just say ‘I love you’ like a normal person.”