Snakes in Suits: When Psychopaths Go to Work (6 page)

After every couple of hands, the onlookers reshuffle and those at the back get up to the front near the table. Ellyn, still holding her daughter, made it to the front. The dealer smiled and began talking directly to her daughter. “You’re such a pretty girl; and smart too, just like your mommy! I bet you’re going to go to college someday!”

This playful chatter continued with others near the front when unintentionally a card bounced over and back, briefly revealing its face.

The dealer quickly tried to move them about, but Ellyn and a few others saw every move.

“I’m in,” shouted Ellyn nervously. “I want to bet.”

“How much?” asked the dealer tentatively, as the crowd moved in closer to see what was going on. Ellyn had her rent money with her, and doubling at least some of it would surely help with the bills.

She thought and thought. “Are you going to bet or not?” shouted the dealer.

“Yes, yes, a hundred dollars!” Those closest to the action held their breath. Ellyn didn’t look like she had a hundred dollars to her name, let alone the ability to bet that much on a street game. The dealer balked—he would have to double her money if she won—but the crowd spoke up. “Let her play,” some shouted. “Yeah, take the bet!” more joined in. The dealer looked nervous.

“Okay, okay,” he said, “show me your money.” Ellyn looked a bit more nervous; she didn’t know why she had to show her money since she was going to win anyway, but the dealer was insistent. “Go ahead, show him your money,” someone said from the crowd behind her. Reaching into her shirtfront and down into her bra she retrieved some cash. She pulled the hundred-dollar bill out and held it in front of her. “Pick your card,” he said, and Ellyn did.

It seemed like slow motion, but in reality, the next few moments
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happened very, very quickly. The dealer flipped the card Ellyn chose and it was the seven of diamonds; he flipped the one next to it and it was the king of clubs. Then someone suddenly yelled “Cops!” from the back of the crowd. The dealer snatched the hundred-dollar bill from Ellyn, quickly folded his card table and disappeared with his ac-complices into the moving horde of tourists and visitors. Ellyn just stood there. She was in shock. She had lost. Tears welled up in her eyes. “My rent money!” she whimpered. Some in the crowd left shaking their heads. An elderly woman in an old blue coat tried to comfort Ellyn and patted her little daughter on the head. She took a ten-dollar bill from her purse and gave it to Ellyn. A few others did the same, but these gestures of altruism and goodwill could not make up for all the lost rent money or the shame of having fallen for one of the oldest scams around. This con, as with many others, skillfully uses basic human nature against the unsuspecting target.

The number of people with psychopathic personalities suggests that most of us will come across at least one psychopath during a typical day. However, the ability of clever psychopaths to hide their true nature makes it difficult to tell them from others one might meet on the street. Although we actually observed the events described in the case above on a street corner in a major American city, we cannot, for lack of more information, determine whether the person is a psychopath or just a crook. For all we know, this is a case of a petty criminal (three-card monte is illegal in this city) conning the curious and the gullible into parting with their money. While tourists may find that such “slice of life” experiences make interesting stories to tell friends back home, the fact is that a crime was committed.

Our point is that several abilities—skills, actually—make it difficult to see psychopaths for who they are. First, they are motivated to, and have a talent for, “reading people” and for sizing them up quickly. They identify a person’s likes and dislikes, motives, needs, weak spots, and vulnerabilities. We all have “buttons” that can be
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pushed, and psychopaths, more than most people, are always ready to push them. Second, many psychopaths come across as having excellent oral communication skills. In many cases, these skills are more apparent than real because of their readiness to jump right into a conversation without the social inhibitions that hamper most people. They make use of the fact that for many people the content of the message is less important than the way it is delivered. A confident, aggressive delivery style—often larded with jargon, clichés, and flowery phrases—makes up for the lack of substance and sincerity in their interactions with others. This skill, coupled with the belief that they deserve whatever they can take, allows psychopaths to use effectively what they learn about a person against the person as they interact with him or her—they know what to say and how to say it to exert influence. Third, they are masters of impression management; their insight into the psyche of others combined with a superficial—but convincing—verbal fluency allows them to change their personas skillfully as it suits the situation and their game plan.

They are known for their ability to don many masks, change “who they are” depending upon the person with whom they are interacting, and make themselves appear likable to their intended victim.

Narcissistic people will find psychopaths to be solicitous of their need to get attention; anxious people will find them to be non-threatening and reassuring; many will find them exciting and fun to be with. Few will suspect that they are dealing with a psychopath who is playing up to their particular personality and vulnerabilities.

In the great card game of life, psychopaths know what cards you hold, and they cheat.

Researchers who interact with known psychopaths regularly describe them as social chameleons. Chameleons, of course, have the capacity to assume the coloration of their environment in order to survive. When clinging to either a leaf or branch, they turn green or brown, using their ability to change the color of their skin to blend into their surroundings. Thus, using nature’s protection, they can remain invisible to their enemies, yet can sneak up on
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unsuspecting insects that make up their diet. They are the perfect invisible predator. Like chameleons, psychopaths can hide who they really are and mask their true intentions from their victims for extended periods. The psychopath is a near-perfect invisible human predator.

This is not to say that most people can’t be charming, effective, socially facile communicators, and still be honest—of course they can. Many people use impression management and manipulation techniques to influence others to like and trust them, or to get what they want from people—very often subconsciously, but sometimes as the result of training, practice, and planning. However, wanting people to like and respect you (and doing what it takes to achieve this) is not necessarily dishonest or insincere—the need for approval and validation from others is normal. Social manipulation begins to be insincere if you really don’t care about the feelings of others or you try to take unfair advantage of others. The difference between the psychopathic approach and the nonpsychopathic approach lies in motivation to take unfair and callous advantage of people. Psychopaths simply do not care if what they say and do hurts people as long as they get what they want, and they are very good at hiding this fact. Given his or her powerful manipulation skills, it is little wonder why seeing a “psychopathic” personality beneath someone’s charming, engaging surface is so difficult.

Not all psychopaths are smooth operators, though. Some do not have enough social or communicative skill or education to interact successfully with others, relying instead on threats, coercion, intimidation, and violence to dominate others and to get what they want.

Typically, such individuals are manifestly aggressive and rather nasty, and unlikely to charm victims into submission, relying on their bullying approach instead. This book is less about them than about those who are capable of and willing to use their “deadly charm” to con and manipulate others. However, if the charming approach does not work, psychopaths readily can resort to both covert and overt intimidation.

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Psychopathy and Narcissism

It is important to note that psychopathy is a personality disorder, and that personality disorders are not the same as mental illness. At a basic level, a person with a personality disorder has a limited range of stereotyped “solutions” that he or she applies to most of the problems encountered in life. Those without a personality disorder are able to apply a variety of behaviors, depending on what best suits the situation.

Individuals with a personality disorder sometimes have trouble in life because of their limited perspective and somewhat inflexible approach. They have difficulty navigating through a world that does not operate in the one-way fashion they prefer, while those who know them may see them as closed-minded, predictable, and sometimes, unfortunately, annoying.

There are ten personality disorders recognized by psychologists, including narcissistic personality disorder and histrionic personality disorder, which are important to understand, as they relate to psychopathy.

For example, narcissistic personality disorder involves an excessive need for admiration and a sense of superiority, among other traits. Someone with narcissistic personality disorder is described in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th edition (DSM-IV) as displaying a pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fan-tasy or behavior), need for admiration, sense of entitlement, and lack of empathy.

Narcissists think that everything that happens around them, in fact, everything that others say and do, is or should be about them. In social situations where this is not the case, they will take action to become the center of attention, such as hogging the conversation or belittling others. Narcissistic people lack other choices in their behavioral repertoire, like paying attention to the needs and wants of others, sharing the floor, and negotiating with others for attention and feedback. Being described as narcissistic is not necessarily a bad thing, according to these individuals, as they see pathological self-admiration
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as merely a natural reaction to their obvious perfection. After all,

“What’s not to like about me?” Some narcissists even may complain that their talent and beauty are burdens they must bear.

Narcissists have difficulty learning alternative behaviors; but over time, and with some assistance—as with all personality disorders—

they can learn to moderate their behaviors and the negative effect they have on others. The real problem for others is when narcissistic features, especially a sense of entitlement and a lack of empathy, shade into antisocial and destructive behaviors. When this happens, the pattern might be described as aggressive or malignant narcissism, which is difficult to distinguish from psychopathy.

Another example is histrionic personality disorder, which has a number of characteristics, the two most salient being emotionality and a need for approval that others may find excessive. These individuals tend to come across as overly dramatic, emotional, and possibly theatrical for the social situation they are in. They sometimes dress and act flirtatiously in an attempt to garner attention. Unlike the narcissist, though, they do not always need to feel superior—

they’ll accept a supportive role, if available, which can provide them with the psychological support they need.

The number of individuals who can be diagnosed with narcissistic (only 1 percent of the general population) or histrionic (2 to 3

percent) personality disorders is small. In fact, many more individuals appear as “narcissistic” or “histrionic” to those around them than actually have these disorders. In addition, some true psychopaths are mislabeled narcissistic or histrionic because of the self-centered or emotional features they display in public. This makes diagnosis difficult and often confusing for those with limited face-to-face experience with these individuals. Only qualified psychologists or psychiatrists can diagnose a personality disorder, including psychopathy, and differentiate it from others that may look similar.

Note: The above is a simplified explanation of personality disorders. Interested readers are directed to the DSM-IV, used by psychologists and psychiatrists, for a more complete discussion of similarities and differences.

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The Manipulative Approach to Life

Many psychopaths are master manipulators and game players; they will use every trick in the book to achieve their goals. The traits and characteristics noted by Hare and Cleckley serve them well and are best understood if explained in the context in which they play out in their daily lives. Understanding how they perform in public can help one begin to catch a glimpse of the real person behind the charming façade and, we hope, will help the reader mount a defense against their clever manipulations.

Let’s look at some strategies and tactics used as part of a three-phase process by many psychopaths. Note that this process is a natural outgrowth of their personality and that often it will be more automatic than consciously planned out. First, they assess the value of individuals to their needs, and identify their psychological strengths and weaknesses. Second, they manipulate the individuals (now potential victims) by feeding them carefully crafted messages, while constantly using feedback from them to build and maintain control. Not only is this an effective approach to take with most people, it also allows psychopaths to talk their way around and out of any difficulty quickly and effectively if confronted or challenged.

Third, they leave the drained and bewildered victims when they are bored or otherwise through with them.

Within this broad framework, several factors come into play.

Here is a more detailed explanation.