Authors: Marie-Louise Jensen
Tags: #Teen & Young Adult, #Historical Fiction
But when Will returned to the ship the following night, he stared at me as though I was a ghost. When I approached him, he shied away as though I carried some deadly disease. I’d left my tale too late.
The mood was abruptly different on board. It was not only me Will kept his distance from. He was silent and taciturn throughout the voyage, keeping to his work, meeting no one’s eyes and spending long spells alone, either aloft in the rigging or in his hammock below.
I also gathered, from conversations I overheard, that both the goods and the destination for the final run of the season had been altered.
‘No lace,’ Harry said. ‘So Will’s in a bad mood—won’t get to don his gown one last time!’ He laughed as though it were a joke, but there were others who didn’t take this change of plan so lightly.
‘Something’s up,’ muttered Sly Pete. ‘I never trusted him.’
‘Nor me,’ agreed Bill. ‘I always said he was a spy and a traitor. We nearly got caught running into Kimmeridge. We never found out the sneak. What does anyone wager it was him?’
‘Come, lads,’ said Jacob, his brow furrowed and his face troubled. ‘How can you talk about not trusting him after all he’s risked for us?’
‘Well, perhaps he had his reasons up to now,’ snapped Sly Pete. ‘And now the time for trust is over. I don’t like it, I tell you. We never go to the same drop twice running. What’s he thinking of?’
Jacob shook his head. ‘He has something weighing heavy on his mind,’ he said. ‘That doesn’t make him a traitor.’
‘Guilty conscience; that’s what it is,’ Sly Pete insisted.
I paced the deck as the ship dipped and rose in the swell, wondering what the truth of this was. Will had been ashore to the very beach I’d fled. Had he heard the truth about me? Was that what troubled him? He wouldn’t speak to me.
At that moment, Will swung himself down through the rigging from the look-out and landed lightly on the deck. At the same moment Sly Pete, Harry, Bill and some of the others emerged from the galley and confronted him.
Hard-Head Bill went to walk past Will, but instead barged him with his shoulder. Will turned swiftly and landed a punch that sent Bill to the deck. He fell heavily with a groan as the breath was knocked from his body.
‘Stop this at once!’ shouted the skipper, taking the steps from the quarterdeck two at a time. ‘What in God’s name is going on? I won’t have brawling aboard my ship!’
‘The man’s a traitor!’ shouted Bill through his bloody nose. Lying on the deck, he pointed a finger at Will. ‘He’s turned us all in and we’re sailing into a trap!’
‘What nonsense is this?’ demanded the skipper, turning to Will. ‘Explain!’
‘I’ve been listening to damned lying accusations since I came back on board,’ said Will with a shrug. ‘I’ve had enough!’
The skipper looked from one to the other, an exasperated expression on his face. ‘What’s your reason for this suspicion?’ he asked the group of angry men. ‘You’ve worked with the man for two winters. Why now?’
‘Haven’t you seen him slinking around?’ demanded Bill. ‘Not looking at anyone? We all know there’s a traitor in among us somewhere. Look how many times they’ve known where to take us this winter! And now he’s changed our run. He’ll betray us and collect the reward.’
The skipper looked at Will, waiting for his denial. We all waited. Everyone on deck paused in what they were doing to hear what Will was going to say.
‘I would never betray any of you,’ said Will steadily. ‘The change of drop was arranged by the venturer. We must trust him, mustn’t we? It’s his money and ship at stake after all. There’s a reason why I’m distracted but has nothing to do with betraying the crew.’
The skipper didn’t move. His eyes didn’t leave Will for a moment. ‘I think you should tell us what’s wrong,’ he said levelly.
‘Very well,’ said Will. He turned to me. I froze in shock and had the strangest feeling that the ship was foundering under my feet. Will’s eyes were accusing and angry.
‘Our mermaid,’ said Will, indicating me with an angry gesture, ‘failed to mention to us that she is the bride of our venturer. That she married him for his money and then having got it, ran off and left him on his wedding night, making him the laughing stock of the county. I’ve never seen a man so angry. There is a reward out for her. And all this time, we’ve been sheltering her! If he were to discover what we’ve done, he’d be revenged on every last man of us!’
Absolute silence followed Will’s words. One by one, they all turned to look at me. I flushed hot with shame and embarrassment. Then my stomach turned and I thought I was going to be sick. It was all over. I was utterly exposed.
‘Isabelle?’ said Jacob’s wondering voice. ‘Tell us that’s not true.’
He sounded quite bewildered, bless his good heart. As though he couldn’t believe it. I wished I could tell him there was some mistake. I turned to Jacob and spoke to him rather than face Will’s accusing gaze.
‘I didn’t know he was your venturer,’ I stammered. Had I really married a smuggler?
‘Don’t stand there looking so innocent,’ snapped Will. Anger and hurt flashed in his blue eyes as he glared at me.
‘I really didn’t know. But it’s true,’ I whispered. ‘At least, it wasn’t quite as simple as that but … Oh, I’m so very sorry.’
‘Why, Isabelle?’ Jacob asked. His voice was still gentle and the sound of it brought tears to my eyes.
‘I didn’t mean any harm … ’ I faltered, my voice breaking as I choked back the tears.
‘You hid the truth—lied! You’ve put us all in danger,’ said Will, still in a hard voice. I tore my eyes from Jacob’s puzzled but sympathetic gaze to face Will. He stood rigid, blazing with anger. ‘You came aboard under false pretences.’
‘I didn’t ask to be rescued,’ I said miserably. ‘I wish you hadn’t, if it will cause so much trouble. I’m sorry I didn’t have the courage to tell you. It … wasn’t easy for me.’
I stumbled to a stop. Will hated me now. But I truly hadn’t known what to do or where to turn. It had all gone so horribly wrong. Unexpectedly, Jacob put a protective arm around me. ‘Never fear, Isabelle,’ he said. ‘We’ll stand by you.’
I couldn’t speak. Instead, I nodded, tears spilling over. I dashed them away. Behind me, outside the safe circle of Jacob’s arm, I heard an argument raging. Some wanted to hand me over and collect the reward, others to keep me with them and protect me. I was hurt and moved in equal measure. I heard no opinion from Will, and knew only that he was furious with me. And somehow that was worse than all the rest. It was worse than anything that might happen to me now. In fact, if Will hated me, I no longer much cared what became of me.
‘What if the reason they’ve been chasing us so hard all winter is cos of her?’ shouted Hard-Head Bill. ‘What if they’ve guessed she’s here? They found her damn dress aboard, didn’t they? It’s put all of us in danger!’
The skipper’s voice reached me once more through the babble of voices. Everyone fell silent to listen to what he had to say.
‘I ask you again, Will. Did you tell Holbrook that we had his bride aboard
The Invisible
?’
‘I told him nothing. Until yesterday, I hadn’t seen him face-to-face since the autumn. Since before … it all came about.’ Will, it seemed, could no longer even bring himself to mention my name.
‘Did you tell anyone at all that we had a woman aboard?’
‘I did not.’
‘Did he give you any clue he might suspect it?’
Will shrugged. ‘I’m not sure.’
‘In that case, I don’t see what all the fuss is about,’ said the skipper firmly. ‘Isabelle is a member of our crew. For safety’s sake, she should stay in boy’s clothing. But no one but us knows anything. So as far as I can see, nothing needs to change. Now back to your stations everyone.’
The men dispersed, talking among themselves. ‘A word, if you please, Isabelle,’ said the skipper. ‘In private.’
Jacob patted me kindly on the shoulder as he released me. I followed the skipper across the deck towards his cabin. I saw with pain that Will turned his face away from me as I passed.
‘Sit down,’ said the skipper as I followed him into his cabin and shut the door behind me. I’d never been in here before. It was a grander cabin than my own small space. Besides his bunk, there was a table, spread with charts and maps, and some chairs. A large chest stood against one wall and a chart hung on the wall above it. There were barometers and other instruments mounted on the wall, and the spring sunshine shone in through a porthole. I sank into a chair, shocked and dispirited.
‘So, my girl. It turns out after all this time, that you’ve put us in a difficult position,’ the skipper said sitting down opposite me.
I nodded, sadly. ‘I’m truly sorry,’ I told him.
‘As you said, it wasn’t your fault Jacob brought you aboard. You certainly came most unwillingly. But you would have spared us this trouble if you’d told me the truth that first night.’
I nodded, shame-faced. ‘But you would have taken me back,’ I said. ‘I dreaded that above all else.’
‘Aye, the chances are I’d have done so,’ admitted the skipper. ‘It’s breaking the law to conceal a wife from her husband. And when that husband owns this ship and pays all the men on board, that complicates life even further.’
‘But I didn’t know that,’ I pointed out miserably. ‘How could I know I’d married a smuggler?’
‘Strictly speaking, he ain’t,’ said the skipper. ‘He’s the money. But that’s a technicality. As you know, this is our last run. The ship goes into dock for cleaning and repair and the crew disperses for the summer. You’ve been a valuable crew member, and I feel a certain loyalty to you, despite this. Therefore I see no reason why we should make any changes tonight. You leave us tomorrow, and where you go and what you do after that is your business. But there is one thing I must ask of you.’
‘Yes,’ I said, relieved by his words. He wasn’t going to take me back. I wasn’t to be coerced into doing anything. But still. From tomorrow I was alone. That was a very bleak prospect indeed.
‘You can never mention to anyone that you’ve been aboard this ship with us,’ the skipper told me earnestly. ‘This was a promise I would have needed to ask from you in any event. But it becomes doubly important now. If your presence became known here, our lives and livelihoods could be in danger. We risk revealing our trade and we could be condemned for harbouring you. The one could lead to the other. So I must ask you for your oath.’
‘I solemnly swear,’ I said earnestly, ‘that I won’t reveal to anyone where I’ve been this winter.’
‘That’s good. Thank you,’ said the skipper, shaking me by the hand. ‘We’ll put you ashore alone in Purbeck tomorrow. It’ll be up to you where you go from there.’
He went to his chest and unlocked it, selecting an oilskin wrapped package which he brought to me. ‘This is your share of the winter’s work,’ he said, handing it to me. ‘You’ve earned it.’
‘Thank you,’ I said, accepting it and tucking it into my shirt. I rose to leave.
As I reached the door the skipper spoke once more. ‘Isabelle,’ he said. I paused, my hand on the door handle, and turned. ‘It’s been a pleasure,’ he said with a wry smile.
‘For me too,’ I said, choking on the words. Then I fled to my cabin. There, I flung myself face-down onto my bunk and wept bitter tears.
It was all over. I no longer had any future with
The Invisible
. Jacob, Harry, and my other friends were lost to me. Worst of all was Will’s fury. He had cared for me. I’d lied to him. Now he would never trust me again. I could understand his anger, but that didn’t make it any easier to bear. I wept until my eyes hurt and my throat was raw. Then I sat up and tried to master my despair.
What should I do the next day? I had no more idea now what should become of me than I’d had the night I walked onto the beach at Durdle Door. The only difference was, this time when fate counselled me to despair, I knew better than to do so. Life could always improve. That thought alone gave me the fortitude to dry my tears and try to marshal my wits. I had learned so much this winter. I was no longer the spoiled, idle wretch I’d been in the autumn. I was stronger, healthier, more able. I’d find something to do. I didn’t doubt it, though at the moment I couldn’t see what or how.