Smash Into You (2 page)

             
Odio españoles.

x

            
 
I showed up to work with exactly thirty-seven seconds to spare. I blamed gorgeous-smash-into-me-girl. I swore my truck was acting funny and I had no cash to fix it.

             
I nodded to Pepe, the owner, and winked at Mesha, the wife of the owner. She giggled behind her hand, and so our day began just like every other day. Pepe owned a feed store and the guy had muscles the size of tangerines. So, that was my job description. In fact, on occasion, he even called me that instead of-

             
"Hey, we need muscle up here!"

             
I shook my head. "Yep!"

             
I trotted up front to help the dude in duds load thirteen bags of chicken feed. It wasn't a glamorous job by any means, and the pay was
caca
, but it kept me fit and busy. That was what I needed. If I had to up and leave, I wouldn't be leaving the guy in a jam because guys like me were a dime a dozen.

             
The day wore on and at punch-out time, I felt a familiar hand reach across my back. Slither was more like it. "Hey, Jude."

             
"Mesha," I mumbled back without turning and rolled my annoyed eyes. Were all women the same? They never wanted me for anything but a good time and then
see ya later
. Which was great for my life, but dang did it get old. Especially since the tune never changed.

             
"Pepe's playing cards tonight." The insinuation hissed from her lips in what I'm sure she thought was a sexy whisper. It made my skin crawl.

             
"That's great for him." I grabbed my metal lunchbox and turned the other way, the long way around the back, but it was worth it to evade her.

             
"That's it?" she practically yelled. "I thought you'd jump on it?"

             
I stopped. Dang. She just caught me on a wrong day. I turned. "Why? Because of what you've got between your legs? Darlin', there are a hundred girls on speed dial. Sorry. I'm a busy guy."

             
And wait for it..."You're such an ass, Jude! I was just testing you anyway!"

             
I waved above my head and kept going. Women. Typical.

             
I threw my lunchbox through the open truck window and prayed it would start as I climbed in. She sputtered, but held out, I'll give her that. I tapped and rubbed the dash. "Come on, girl. Come on."

             
She cranked and I drove straight to the auto parts place. I popped the hood and waved away the heated smoke. Sighing, I closed my eyes. Mother...this was going to cost a paycheck to fix, which I didn't have to spare. I went inside and priced a radiator. I almost punched the man in his teeth when he told me the price. "Are they made with titanium now and I'm just out of the loop?"

             
"Economy's bad for everyone, son."

             
I held the counter with both hands and hung my head. "Well...dang."

             
"Look, uh, I might need a little help here tomorrow. If you come help me for the day, I'll take half off the radiator, all right?"

             
I looked up, unable to stop the incredulous look. People didn't do good deeds for nothing. It just wasn't the world we lived in any longer. But I looked up into the older man's eyes and saw that he was serious. There was a story there. A son, maybe, a nephew, he was trying to make up for. I didn't want to know. I didn't want to get attached.

             
"You serious?"

             
"Dead," he countered.

             
I spoke slowly, "OK. I can be here at around two when I get off from my job. That all right?"

             
"Yep. I need some help stocking the shelves, so that's perfect. I'll work you a full eight hours," he warned.

             
"It's worth it." I swallowed and hesitated. "Thank you."             

             
"Sure thing, son."

             
I nodded and turned to head back to my busted truck, not real sure what to think. But for now, I'd take it.

             
As soon as I got home
—
barely because the truck overheated again
—
I showered and threw on some clean jeans with my boots and a button-up. The party was going strong by the time I arrived. Zander met me in a flourish at the door, the non-stop host. He offered me smokes and dopes and every kind of liquor under the sun. I waved him off and took a soda from the fridge. I never had been much of a drinker, and taking things to make me disoriented and off my game wasn't smart for someone who needed his head on straight at all times. I hopped up on the counter and nodded my head to some of the guys that always hung around Zander. "Hey, man."

             
"Jude! Didn't think you'd make it," one of them yelled over the music and bumped my fist. "Dude, the honeys are in full force tonight." He grinned this calculated little grin. "Zetas are here, dude. Zetas."

             
I laughed. "I thought this was an anti-frat party?"

             
"Fraternity, no. Sorority, yes!"

             
I shook my head as he took off laughing. "Idiot," I muttered under my breath with a laugh.

             
"Who, me?" I heard the sugary voice and dreaded looking up. I didn't even know why I came out. I didn't think I had the energy to play this game tonight.

             
I lifted my face to find one of the party circle regulars. She wasn't one of those awful girls who slept with anything that hit on her and purred all over you. She was a harmless flirt and a pretty sweet girl. Which was why I always tried to steer clear. Sweet and harmless meant I'd just hurt them instead. I couldn't do it. "Hey, Lila. How's it going?"

             
She sipped her red Solo cup and shook her head in a cute, noncommittal way. "Ehh. There are way too many girls here tonight." She peeked back and laughed at Zander trying to keep up with someone on the dance floor. "See? How can I compete with
that
?"

             
We both watched as the clearly intoxicated girl fell all over the place in her gyrations. "Yeah," I agreed. "All right. See you later."             

             
"Wanna dance later, maybe?" I hated the hopefulness in her voice.

             
"Nah, not tonight." I hopped down and left without a backwards glance, calling over my shoulder. "See you around, OK?"

             
They were playing Eminem and I was so over it. This whole scene...just over it. Maybe it was time to start looking for a new identity. Instead of college towns, maybe I could try a farm town or something. I was young, but had been forced to grow up too much, too fast, too soon. I just wanted quiet and peace, even if for just a small amount of time.

             
On my way out, I waved to Zander so he would know I was gone. Just as I turned back, lightning struck up my spine. Daggum....it was her.

             
The girl who crashed into me.

             
My feet made up their mind before my head did and I was walking her way. She was leaning against the hall wall by the stairs and was currently being cornered by a guy with two red cups in his hands. She was politely trying to wave him off while simultaneously looking for someone in the crowd. Or maybe that was just a decoy move to make this guy go away.

             
Before I could think, I found myself helping her with that problem. "Beat it."

             
He looked over his shoulder and scoffed. "I'm sorry. Do I know you?"

             
"You're going to know me very well if you don't scram. It doesn't look like she wants to talk." I looked at her face for the first time and knew she knew exactly who I was...given by the heinous glare I was currently receiving. I crossed my arms and cocked my head a little. "Do you want to talk to him, darlin'?"

             
She opened her mouth to rebut, but must have thought better of it. She stared at my face and seemed to have another revelation. The shape of her lips changed as she looked back at two-cups-McGee and she smiled a little at him. "Thanks for the offer, but my boyfriend finally made it. He'll get me something to drink."

             
She moved out from behind him and stood beside me, but not close enough to touch. I found myself twinging with regret about that and frowned. There was something about this girl that was twisting me inside out.

             
"OK," the guy drawled and lifted one of his cups in a farewell wave. "Sorry, man. Didn't know she was with you."
              She scoffed as she watched him go. "Of course he apologizes to
you
."

             
I ignored her sneer and decided to start digging my own grave. "Is your boyfriend really here?"

             
"Don't have one. Don't want one." She looked me right in the eyes. "Don't need one."

             
The words didn't matter. The only thing that existed in that second were those lips. The night we 'met', it was dark and raining, and though it was obvious then how gorgeous she was, it was also obvious now that she was different. She had a little scar on her top right lip that she probably hated as much as I hated my scar, but God help me...I wanted to kiss that scar a million times over right then. Her hair was blond and hung in loose curls around her shoulders. She was wearing cowboy boots with her jean shorts, and her shirt was definitely not see-through tonight, but she was wearing long sleeves though it was hotter than piss outside. Her eyes wandered in an uncomfortable way as she looked around the room at anything but me. She had a couple scars on her neck that looked like chicken pocks or something. She tugged at her sleeves and looked at the floor as if gathering courage.

             
This wasn't a normal girl.

             
Dang...and she was trouble.

             
"Well...I'll see you." I turned to go and was surprised when her little hand shot out to stop me. Her hand couldn't wrap around my arm and her eyes bulged a little before she dropped her hand and looked at me again. Her eyes were blue. Dang...

             
"You send that guy away and now you're just going to give me the ol'
See ya later?
What the hell? Maybe I wanted that guy to give me a drink."

             
"If that's true, then why did you look so relieved and say I was your boyfriend?"

             
"That doesn't matter. First, you hit me with your big, stupid truck-"

             
"You hit me," I corrected with a grin.

             
"-and then come in here, all Neanderthal like, and make the males scatter before hitting the road? What gives?"
              I kept my grin in place. "I don't like to see a lady take a cup full of the date rape drug. That's all."
              "You're right. I'm eighty-nine percent sure it was full of the date rape drug, which is why I would have never taken it. But thanks anyway." She shuffled her boots. Good Lord, it was adorable. "So you can be chivalrous here
—
why not be chivalrous at a car accident?"
              My grin fell. What the hell was I doing? She was right. I had no business being here. I cleared my throat. "Like I said, I'll be going. Have a good night..." I hadn't meant to pause for her name. I didn't want to know. It would just make things worse-

             
"Marley," she snapped. "The girl you crashed into and threw in her car to let her deal with her own car troubles name is Marley."

             
"Nice to meet you, Marley. I'll see you around."

             
She scoffed as I turned. "He really doesn't remember. Or care."

             
I didn't stick around to find out what she meant.

Three

            
 
I woke before my alarm clock went off. I couldn't stop thinking about that girl. Marley. She didn't eat up my every word, she called me on my crap instead. She was just...something I'd never encountered before. I couldn't put my finger on it, but it was evident that I needed to stay away from her. I had a big, long, busy day ahead of me and could think of no better way than that to keep my mind occupied.

             
That day, as I hauled bags of feed and used my arms until the muscles burned, I found myself hoping her car was all right. That afternoon, I made my way over to the parts store. I hopped out of the truck, swinging the door open before jerking to a stop as a car sped from the lot. My gut twisted with fear, but I felt my brow crease with a frown. It couldn't have been Biloxi. He would have come after me right then and there. He wouldn't wait. That wasn't his style. I had been running from that man, and the people he worked for, every second that I could remember of my life.

             
I didn't know what they wanted. I didn't know who they were or where they came from. All I did know was that I had something they wanted. My mother died trying to keep me from them. It had been too long since I'd seen him. Three months was some kind of record for us.

            
 
In fact, it made me even more on edge that it had been that long, and not for lack of my trying to evade him. I was good at laying low, but as much I hated him, he was good at finding me.

             
Biloxi, Mississippi. That was the place where my mother was killed. Biloxi was now his name until I could find him for myself. Then I'd call him by his real name as I choked the life from his throat.

             
"Son?"

             
I looked inside to find the old store owner looking at me expectantly. "Yes, sir. Coming."

             
He led the way to the back room and showed me the piles and piles of boxes to be stacked. The man was really going to make me work for it. I nodded to him and got to it. I heard the front door bell ding several times and voices carry as he helped his customers. I tried not to be paranoid about Biloxi and just get the work done.

             
The bell rang again and a female voice asked sweetly for help to find the right taillight. Lightning shot up my spine again. I inched my head past the shelving to see the girl who was hell bent on destroying me. I cursed under my breath. I took a deep breath and got back to work. I'd just ignore her and she wouldn't even know I was back here.

             
"Jude? Can you bring me a box on shelf L3C? It's on the bottom right."

             
Dang. I almost just said, 'Screw it', and bolted, but I owed the guy. So I got the box he requested and shuffled, grumbling, out to the front. As soon as she saw me, the fire in her eyes sparked. I felt the sides of my lips tug.

             
Daggum adorable girl.

             
"You," she sneered in surprise.

             
"You," I rebutted and winked. "And how are we tonight, darlin'?"

             
"Well, I've got a busted taillight thanks to you. I got pulled over." She reached into her purse, searching for something. "Like I can freaking afford an eighty-five dollar ticket."

             
For the first time in a long time, I felt a heap of guilt settle in my chest. "Listen..." She looked up, exhaustion and frustration spelled all over her face. "I'm sorry about that. There are just some things that you don't understand about me."

             
I looked at the owner. He was giving me a funny look. I looked back to her and that sexy, scarred lip of hers.

             
"I get it," she said, surprising me, and sighed. "I can barely afford my own insurance. I work at the cafe on Edgemont Street during the day and a bar at night and barely make it. I'm sure working at a place like this, you don't make much money either." She cringed and looked at the owner. "No offense."

             
"None taken, miss," he said and looked at me, as if it was my turn and he was enjoying all this—thoroughly.

             
"It's a little more of a problem than just can't afford the insurance..." I frowned before smirking my winning grin. "I'm a dirty, rotten scoundrel. I know."

             
She cracked a small smile. "You're right. You are. Scoundrels leave girls in the middle of the road-"

             
"Uhuh. I did
not
leave you in the road." I leaned my hip on the counter, bringing me just a little bit closer to her. "I made sure you were safely in your car and on your way."

             
She nodded and smiled like she had a secret. "That's true. Your method could use some work, though."

             
I grinned. "Sorry. In my defense, it was raining and it was dark."

             
She scoffed and laughed. "It rains and gets dark all the time in Alabama! That's not a license to be a jerk."

             
"You're right. My mistake," I whispered.

             
She looked up and latched onto my gaze. Held it captive. My insides squirmed with the need to run, but fought for the right to stay. Lucky for her,
run
won.

             
"Anyway, let me pay for your taillight at least." I took out my wallet and tried for a smile. "Then we can at least part as friends."

             
Her smile shook. "I thought you went to school here?"

             
"I do...but I'm pretty busy. I doubt that we'll run into each other again."

             
She bit into her bottom lip. "So you won't be hitting me with your truck and then saving me from drunk guys on a regular basis?"

             
I chuckled. "I hope not."

             
Her face showed disappointment. Even after everything I did to her, she still wanted to see me? This girl was my conundrum.

             
"Well..." She took the box in her hand. "Thanks, I guess."

             
She turned to go. I watched in a strange agony, a pull over me so strong to follow her. Ask her out, take her to get a coffee. Anything. But the thought of her meeting the same fate as my mother stopped me from doing any of those things.

             
I turned to go and the owner grabbed my arm. "Why didn't you ask that pretty thing out? She obviously wanted you to."

             
I smiled, glad that he noticed, but unable to do anything about it. "That's why I had to let her go."

             
He laughed and slapped my back. "Son, that makes no sense."

             
"I know." I smiled, but didn't feel it. I didn't feel it at all.

x

             
I took the radiator, paid him what I owed him, and thanked him for letting me work off the rest of it. He said he always had odd jobs and if I was ever in a bind for some cash, come see him. I swear that man almost made me believe in humanity again. Almost. It was late when I finally made it home. My cell had a couple of texts that I ignored. When I showed up at my door, I realized I should have answered them.

             
"Jude," she crooned. Yes,
crooned
.

             
"Kate," I said, unable to mask my annoyance. "When someone doesn't answer the phone, that's not an invitation to come to their house."

             
"You haven't returned my calls." She stood from the step and revealed the short, strapless sundress she wore. "I've just missed you lately. And when you didn't answer the phone, I wanted to check on you."

             
"I'm perfectly fine. Just busy."

             
I tried to go around her, but she wasn't having it. She followed close behind as I unlocked the door. I sighed. I wasn't opening this door. She'd come in and never leave. So, though I despised the idea, I turned and looked at her. I jingled the keys in my hand and made myself grin at her. "Darlin', I'm tired. Worked all day. I'm ready for sleep."

             
"We can sleep," she said coyly, resting her hand on my stomach. "We sleep good together, don't we?"

             
"Alone," I corrected, but knew I had to do something. I leaned down and closed my eyes. Without even my permission, a cute little scarred lip and blue eyes came into mind as I let my lips touch hers. She grabbed the back of my neck and pressed me to her. I knew Kate. I knew what she tasted like and I knew what she wanted. I had misjudged her in the beginning when I just wanted a distraction. She hadn't been who I thought. She was clingy, and every now and then I came across one of them. But things were just changing for me. I felt tired. All the time. Tired of life. Tired of this scene, this same scenario.

             
I touched her cheek as I pulled away from her to soothe the sting of my words. "Go on home, OK? I need to sleep. Had a long day."

             
"OK." She gripped my shirt front and smiled small. She really was a gorgeous girl that just needed some self-respect. "But don't wait so long to call, Jude. I miss you and I can help you relax when you have a bad day."

             
I smiled. "Bye, Kate."

             
"Bye, baby," she whispered, kissing my cheek before sauntering away, obviously thinking I was enjoying the show.

             
I turned to my door and out of the corner of my eye found my neighbor, an old, crabby man who had no love for me, giving me the stink-eye as he looked between Kate and me. I waved and smiled. "And how are you today, Mr. Fowler?"

             
"Eat me," he grumbled and kept going. "And keep it down in there!"

             
"Alrighty then," I laughed and went inside.

             
The scalding shower felt like heaven in a box. My muscles quivered and stung with relief from all the work I'd done. Honestly, I was getting hard skin everywhere and my shirts were almost too tight in the arms as it was. I wasn't one of those guys that needed to be ripped, but if I didn't move on soon, or at least get another job, I was going to have to get a new wardrobe.

             
I got out and stood on the mat to air dry. That was the great thing about living alone. I shaved and ran my fingers through my shaggy hair. It had gotten to be a dark blond since I hadn't been in the sun in a while. The first time I hit the beach, it would lighten up a lot.

            
 
I brushed my teeth, spitting the gritty, cheap toothpaste out into the cracked sink. As I turned, I got a glimpse of the other reminder of who and what I was. On my stomach was a large, round scar. I'd always had it. My mom told me 'they' gave it to me. It was some kinda IV port or something. Though why they would need to put IVs in me, I didn't know, and apparently didn't have the mind capacity to come up with a plausible explanation. Mom never said. I was too young when she died, only seven years ago—I was fourteen. Mom and I were in Biloxi where we'd been for a few weeks. I was brushing my teeth, they busted through the back door, and Mom jumped in the bathroom with me. I was angry at her because I was in my boxers and embarrassed. I didn't know they were there. When she opened the window, I knew. I climbed out first and jumped down. She came out next and her foot caught. She didn't break her fall on her feet like I had and she groaned as her leg twisted.

             
I remembered that she hobbled along with me. We thought we'd made it when we reached the edge of the yard, but sirens blared in the distance right before a shot. I turned and watched as she gave me the most regretful look. Her hand gripped her stomach and I knew everything was about to change for me. She'd been shot. She slid to the ground.

            
 
I saw
him
coming across the yard. Mom looked at him and back to me with pleading eyes. "Run, baby."

             
"No, Mom, no." I was embarrassed again as I felt a tear drop from my nose. My knees hurt in the dry, hard, rocky gravel, but I stayed right there. Right there with her.

             
"You listen to me, Jude Ezra Jackson. You've got to go without me. Now."

             
"No!"

             
"Yes." She touched my cheek and the sob that held me together broke free in a wild noise because I knew this was it. This one moment would be my last with her. "Son, know that you were never my burden, you were my joy. I wanted you, I fought for you, and you were the best thing that I ever did. I love you, Jude. Hey, Jude, take a sad song and make it better...right, baby?"