Slow No Wake (6 page)

I suddenly felt claustrophobic in the small space and with his close proximity. I wanted to get out of his bedroom to get some air.

“I’ve got to go,” I said as I pushed away from him and toward the door.

“My door’s always open for you, Alexandria. I’ll be waiting for you.”

I hurried through his apartment and out the front door. When I was finally outside, I inhaled a deep breath. Had he really named his cat after me? Ugh.

***

A
few hours later, I found myself at the mall. I decided I needed a new outfit for my date with Daniel: something soft and fun and a little flirty. Something more appropriate for the Florida weather than the Midwest clothes I had brought with me.

Most of the shops seemed to carry clothes made for the bar scene, something I had grown beyond a few years ago. I managed to find one store that had cute cotton dresses and casual beach wear that seemed perfect.

As soon as I entered the shop, I felt overwhelmed. There were suddenly too many choices. There were several racks of flowered print sun dresses that all looked good and I could feel my breathe getting more shallow as I thought about having to choose one. Then a teardrop fell down my cheek. Why was I crying? 

I took in a deep breath and tried to calm myself down. I tried to rationalize my feelings of having a nervous breakdown in the middle of a clothing store. What was going on? Besides the obvious dilemma of having to choose between two completely different guys and being unable to, now I had to choose between a number of terrific dresses and I had no way to decide.

Then it hit me.

I had never been clothes shopping without my sister. I had never made a clothing purchase without running it by her and getting her opinion. She was the fashion expert. She always knew exactly the right thing to wear for every occasion.

Now here I was alone, in a clothing shop, with no one to give me advice. There was one to assist me in my time of need. How could I possibly pick the perfect dress without her expertise?

For the first time since I disowned my sister, I actually missed her.

Tears streamed down my face as I hurried out of the shop without a dress. I practically ran out of the mall knowing that one of my Midwest dresses would have to suffice. 

I sat in my car and tried to let out the remainder of my tears. I had been so angry at my sister for so long, I hadn’t had the opportunity to miss her or even mourn for the loss of our relationship. Not only had Hannah been my sister, she had always been my best friend. I felt more alone than I had ever been in my life.

When the last of my sobs finally subsided, I decided to take advantage of the beautiful day. In an effort to calm my nerves, I decided to take a walk down the main street that paralleled the beachfront.

Most of the retail establishments I passed were restaurants and gift shops, but one small place caught my eye: Books by the Beach. The quaint shop looked like it had a variety of books as well as a small area for coffee. I decided to grab a new book and sit down for a much needed break. It was a lovely day, perfect for sitting outside with an herbal tea and clearing my mind. I decided to engage in some people-watching, one of my favorite therapist hobbies. I always enjoying trying to figure out what I thought each person’s story might be. Sometimes, I let my imagination run wild and made up a fun story for the person, couple or group I was sneaking peeks at. Why were they there? What were they talking about? Where were they going?

When I entered Books by the Beach, there was no doubt that it was going to become a regular hideout for me. I immediately felt comfortable amongst the shelves lined with a combination of new and used books. There was also a smell of fresh brewed coffee and cinnamon buns emanating from the small coffee bar that lined the far side of the place.

I really liked the idea of being able to sit inside or outside, depending on the weather and my mood. I quickly scanned the shelves for a good book. I settled on
Savages
, because I had seen the movie without reading the book, but heard it was worthwhile.

I paid for the book then went over to the coffee counter and ordered a mint herbal tea. There were no other patrons in the place, so I had my choice of outdoor tables. I choose one with an overhead umbrella that still allowed for some sun.

I relaxed for a minute and closed my eyes as I felt the warmth from the sun on my face. It was so nice to be out of the chilly Midwest weather. Moving to Florida might have been a good decision after all. I took in a deep breath of the clean gulf air. The breeze was gentle and warm. The only sound I heard was the faint call of a seagull in the distance.

I was finally starting to clear the turmoil in my mind and return to my no wake zone when I could sense someone sitting next to me. I briefly panicked as I wondered what I should do. Then I slowly opened my eyes to see Eddie sitting in the chair next to me staring at me.

“Hello, Alexandria,” he said in greeting.

“
Wh-what are you going here?” I stammered.

He grinned.
“Sitting with you.” There was that damn dimple again. The sight of it made my heart race.

“I don’t remember inviting you to sit at my table.”

“Hmm,” he said as he reached for my tea. “What are you drinking?”

Then to my shock and horror, he helped himself to a sip from my cup.

“You got the mint herbal tea. Good choice.” He took another sip of my tea then placed the cup down between us. Did he really think I was going to share it with him?

“I also don’t remember giving you permission to drink my tea,” I glared at him.

Eddie leaned in close and said, “Alexandria, you should know by now that I take what I want.”

I gulped. He was so close I could feel heat radiating from his body. A shiver ran through me.

“And you want my tea?” I asked as I instinctively pulled the cup closer to me. 

He leaned in close enough to whisper in my ear. “That’s not all I want.”

My throat went completely dry so I took a sip of tea before remembering Eddie had just taken two sips from the cup. The thought of his lips recently touching the same thing my lips were touching turned me on more than I liked. I couldn’t stop thinking about his lips and what they could do to me.

When I glanced at Eddie, he was staring at me. And not just any stare. He was giving me a very naughty ‘I want to rip your clothes off’ stare. Oh, God, I’m in trouble, I thought as my stomach started to churn. The only thing I could be thankful for was that we were outside in a very public place.

“When are you going to let me show you everything I want from you, Alexandria?” His gaze was laser intense.

I tried to speak but no words came out. I had to think rationally before I did something completely stupid. But the only thing that came to mind were his lips touching mine. I instinctively bit my lower lip, which then reminded me of Daniel and the utterly sexy way he always did that.

Oh, God. I was definitely going to drive myself insane.

It took every ounce of energy I could muster to stand and grab my book. “I think I’d better go,” I managed to mutter.

Eddie motioned toward my half empty cup. “Aren’t you going to finish your tea? I think it’s still hot.” The way he said it, made it sound like the tea wasn’t the only thing that was still hot. Ugh.

“Why don’t you keep it,” I said as I turned to leave.

I tried to hurry away but I could feel Eddie coming up behind me. His energy was unmistakable.

“Still going on that date tonight?” he asked when he caught up to me.

“Not that it’s any of your business,” I said, trying to put him off.

He slid in front of me and stopped me from walking any further. I froze when I saw that his expression had turned serious. He cupped my chin with his hand and gazed into my eyes. “Spend the night with me instead of him.”

I gulped. Why was Eddie doing this now? I was going to see Daniel in just a few hours.

“I can’t do that, Eddie.” I would never do that to Daniel.

“Yes you can,” he urged. Eddie had so much desire in his eyes it took my breath away.

“I can’t break a date I have in a few hours. It isn’t fair.”

Eddie ran a finger down the side of my cheek and it sent shivers through me. I knew if I didn’t get away from him immediately, I’d end up in bed with him and I would be breaking my date with Daniel. Deep down, I knew I didn’t want to do either. Or did I?

“You’re too good, Alexandria,” Eddie said. “Do you know that?”

I didn’t have the time or desire to analyze that one. I just knew I had to get away from Eddie’s charms before he charmed me right into bed.

“I really need to go.” I tried to sidestep Eddie but he just moved in front of me again and continued to block my way.

He leaned close to my ear and I could feel his breath on my neck. And God, he smelled good. Like coconut suntan oil. “If you don’t get everything you need tonight, you know where to find me. Just knock on my door. I’ll be waiting.”

Then he gave me a little grin, turned and walked away, leaving me melting on the sidewalk into a heap of lust and desire.

***

E
very outfit I owned was out of my closet and on my bed and I still had no idea what to wear. I was regretting not getting something, anything, when I was at the mall, because nothing I owned seemed right.

I could feel my eyes begin a tear up and the last thing I wanted to do was cry right before my date. I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down. I knew my emotions were running high and it wasn’t just because of my wardrobe. It was thinking about Eddie and Daniel and my sister and even my ex. I needed to get ahold of myself and prepare myself for my date, which was in less than an hour.

I wanted to look good for Daniel and I wanted to be in the right place emotionally by the time I got there. Daniel deserved to have my very best and I wanted him to have it.

***

D
aniel asked me to meet him at a trendy Mexican restaurant on the beach. It was only a few blocks from my place, so I didn’t mind walking. It felt good to be outside, to feel the still-warm sun on my face and the fresh sea breeze blow through my hair.

I got there a few minutes early but I noticed Daniel was already waiting for me by the entrance. He was holding a single red rose.

His face lit up when he saw me. “You look amazing. I like your out-of-the-office attire.”

I had decided to wear a sleeveless red mini-dress that I had forgotten I bought. It was one if my sister’s bright ideas. She thought I needed some more sexy attire but I never had occasion to wear it with Jeff, my ex. Maybe I should have. He might not have been so quick to call me boring.  

Daniel was wearing black jeans that fit snugly in all the right places and a white polo that accentuated his tanned and muscular arms. The slow burn, I mentioned before, had just flamed a bit. He looked hot.

“You don’t look so bad yourself,” I said.

He handed me the flower and I sniffed it. I always loved the subtle fragrance of fresh roses. “It’s lovely. Thank you.”

Daniel put out an elbow for me to grab. I wrapped my arm under his and followed him into the restaurant.

He had reserved a table right next to the open air seating. We were still covered but we could also feel the ocean breeze and had a magnificent view of the gulf. I was starting to love the smell of the sea air and its slight dampness as I inhaled. Few sounds could compare to the rhythm of the ocean tide as the small waves crashed into the beach. 

After the waitress took our orders, Daniel pointed out toward the setting sun.

“It really is beautiful,” I said as I watched a lone gull fly in the horizon. The moment was picture perfect. “We didn’t get sunsets this fantastic in the Midwest.”

“Or in Pennsylvania,” he said.

“Are you glad you moved to Florida?” I asked.

Daniel gave the question some thought.
“For the most part. I’ve been extremely fortunate with my job and my Master’s program. And Tom lets me do my internship hours in the evenings, which is amazing. You can’t beat the weather. I love being outdoors. I love the ocean and kite surfing, obviously.”

I smiled. “Yes, I did notice the kite surfing shrine in your office,” I joked.

“It’s a bit excessive, isn’t it?”

I shook my head. “No, it’s obviously something you’re passionate about.”

“The only thing I haven’t been able to find in Florida is a relationship,” he admitted. Then he glanced up at me and our eyes met. “I hope to change that soon.”

I could feel my cheeks redden. I didn’t know what to say. I suddenly felt nervous.

Daniel was looking at me with so much tenderness and a truly open heart. He had laid his cards on the table and it scared the hell out of me. Was I really ready for a relationship? It suddenly hit me in the face why I was so attracted to Eddie. Besides the obvious physical appeal, his model perfect looks and the sexual heat he exuded with every breath he took, I was attracted to him because there was no chance of ever having to worry about anything serious. He had made it clear he wasn’t into anything more than casual hook-ups. He was Mr. I-don’t-do-two-night-stands. A big part of me was scared to death of getting serious with someone again. I had just put my heart back together again after Jeff (and my sister) broke it into a million little pieces. I wasn’t sure I was ready to risk having it broken again.