Authors: Victoria Vane
Chapter 10
In the end, they'd fried up the cans of Spam and shared the peaches. It was hardly the best meal she'd ever had, but Nikki didn't taste it anyway. Her senses were far too overloaded by Wade. The tiny cabin virtually vibrated with sexual tension. She wondered what the night would bring, but also knew it was up to her. He'd made his desire known in no uncertain terms, but he'd also made it clear he wouldn't take without an invitation.
She knew coming up here with him was stupid and reckless, but her life had been dull and empty for so damned long. After moving to Atlanta, she'd worked her way through at least a half-dozen loser boyfriendsâhoping to find the elusive Mr. Right. Once she'd given up cowboys, she'd thought she'd find a decent guy, but any decent ones she'd dated were as dull as dirt.
At twenty-eight, she'd thought she'd be settled down by now, but instead she'd just plainâ¦settled. Every day was the same routine, punching the time clock, meeting a few friends in the cafeteria for lunch, talking smack about their respective bosses, and then clocking out at the end of the day. No dates. No cowboys. No crazy passionate sex.
She'd never felt the lack of intimacy in her life more deeply. She had little doubt she was getting ready for a big fall. She was more than half there already, but sleeping with Wade could only lead to heartache. No good could come of getting involved with himâwell, that probably wasn't true. She had a feeling it would be
damned
good
âjust not the aftermath.
That
would be a train wreck.
She'd never been able to detach her emotions from sex. When she gave herself, it was always the whole enchiladaâ
that
was her problem. Sex always equated to love but men weren't wired that way. Wade had already admitted he had no desire to settle down. Given his age, and single status, he wasn't likely to change.
She continued this internal debate while sitting in front of the fire sipping Jack Daniels from the bottle. She'd used the excuse of seeking warmth, but what she really needed was its numbing qualities. She'd never been this wound up. She took another choking swallow that scorched all the way down her throat but so far it had done nothing to quench the desire burning low in her belly.
He cocked a brow at her. “You sure you can handle that?”
She took a bigger swig, hoping it would work some magic on her nerves. She offered him the bottle.
He raised a hand. “I don't drink that stuffâ¦not anymore.” When she would have asked why, he shook his head. “I don't care to talk about it.”
“Fine, be that way,” she snapped, her nerves ever tighter.
How the hell was she ever going to get through this night? Stillness followed, punctuated by pops and sparks from the fire. She scooted closer, wishing she'd brought warmer clothes. The temperature had dropped at least thirty degrees since they'd arrived and Wade had warned her it could get well below freezing before morning.
Wade had settled his length on the floor, crossing his booted ankles, one hand propped under his head studying her. The silence lengthened, thickening the air until she felt compelled to break it again. “How do you entertain yourselves up here with no TV, Internet, or even a radio?”
“Usually we're too tired to think about anything besides food and sleep.”
“It
is
a hard life, isn't it?”
“Ranching is a damned hard way of life. People kill themselves just to get by, but they're just as proud as they are tenacious.”
“And close-knit too, aren't they? Like your family.”
“Yeah. I guess we're pretty tight.”
“I always wished for that kind of family.”
“Did you?” He grimaced. “It isn't always what it's cracked up to be.”
“You just take it for granted because you've never known anything else.”
“I s'pose you're right. What else do you wish for, Nikki? What do you want out of life?”
“I don't know,” she replied. “I guess maybe that's part of why I came to Montana. Not just to say good-bye to Daddy, but to figure it out.”
“I'm sorry this trip has turned into such a mess for you.”
“It hasn't been all bad.” She darted a gaze at him and then took another sip from the bottle. “I have to admit there've been a
few
redeeming moments.”
His mouth twitched. “Are you sure you want to drink any more of that? Seems to me you got to feeling pretty raw the last time you drank.”
“I overdid it because you encouraged me,” she accused.
“Yeah, well, that's debatable, since you ordered the shots. Either way I'd rather you kept a clear head tonight.” He sat up and took the bottle from her hands.
“Why's that? Are you implying I can't trust you?”
“You can trust
me
, sweetheart. I'm just wondering if you can trust yourself.”
“Why you deluded jackass! If you haven't noticed, I've managed just fine to keep my hands off you,” she uttered the bold-faced lie. In reality, it was all she could do to keep her hands off him.
“Is that so? Then why'd you come up here with me?”
The directness of his question threw her off balance.
“IâI had lot of reasonsâthe scenery, riding the horse, the nature experience.”
“Is that all?”
“Yes, that's all,” she insisted. “And now all I want is a warm bed. You said we'd be getting up early, right?”
“Yeah. Before sunrise.”
“Then I'm going to turn in.” She nodded to the cots. “Which one's mine?”
“Take your pick,” he replied.
She dragged the nearest one closer to the fire, and unrolled her sleeping bag thinking she'd soon be snugly and safely cocooned but knew she wouldn't sleep. She was strung so tight she thought she'd snap, but her agitation worsened when she realized she had to answer nature's call.
“Wade, where are theâ¦erâ¦facilities?”
“Facilities?” He shook his head with a chuckle. “I'm sorry, Nikki. I know it's a bit rough on a woman, but you'll just need to pick a spot out behind the cabin and squatâunless you want to use a coffee can inside.”
“No, thank you! Do you at least have a flashlight?”
He rose, got one from his pack, and handed it to her. “Do you want me to come with you?”
“No. I can manage,” she answered tersely.
“All right, but stay close by, OK? I wouldn't want you to meet up with any new four-legged friends.”
Her throat went dry. “You mean
wolves
?”
“Wolves, bears, coyotes, or maybe a mountain lion. There's lots of nocturnal prowlers up here.”
“Maybe I can hold it until morning, after all.”
“Don't be ridiculous. C'mon.” He took her by the arm and guided her to the door.
“But I have a shy bladder, Wade. I won't be able to go if you're standing nearby.”
“I won't be. I need to answer the call too. I'll just stay close enough to hear you if you need me.”
He opened the door and the night air hit them like an arctic blast. “Looks like the first frost of the season,” Wade remarked, his breath forming a smoky white vapor. “Snow will come early.”
“Great. Just great,” she mumbled as she walked past. “I get to pee icicles.”
“Look on the bright side⦔ He chuckled. “It's too cold for any snakes to bite you in the ass.”
“Snakes! You never said
anything
about snakes!”
“Don't worry, darlin'. There's only one venomous species up here and they're all probably hibernating by now. Besides, you're unlikely to get bit unless you step on one.”
“But it's dark! How could I help stepping on one?”
“You want me to hold that light for you?”
“Yes! No! Can you at least check for snakes?”
He made a sweep of the entire area behind the cabin, and then handed her the flashlight with an obnoxious grin. “I'll be close by.”
Although Nikki made quick business of it, her thin Southern blood was frosted by the time she finished. Once she got back inside, she wondered how much she should undress for bed. She pulled her arms out of her coat sleeves with chattering teeth. “Wade, I'm f-freezing my ass off.”
“Now that would be just plain criminal.”
He came behind her, cloaking her in his big, surprisingly warm body. His hands slid down to anchor at her hips. “It's a damned fine ass, by the way. I've been studying it from all angles.” He dropped his mouth to the tender spot behind her ear. “Why don't you just pull that cot up beside mine?”
He rocked his hips into her backside, ensuring that his interest,
his
arousal
, was evident.
Her thighs tightened with the tremor of desire that snaked through her. Her body thrummed with want, but she swore she wouldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing itâcertainly not after what he'd done to her with the peaches. “What? Fend off the wolves outside just to offer myself up to the one inside?”
He chuckled, a low and husky rumble that reverberated through her back. “I'm only trying to ensure your comfort, sweetheart, and I can't think of any better way than to warm you from the inside out.”
She was already feeling warmer. Part of her wanted to sink into him and take everything he offered, but her wiser half prevailed. “No thanks. I'll pass on that.” Forcing herself to step away from his glorious heat, she spun out of his grasp. “You see how easy that was? Maybe you're not quite as irresistible as you thought.”
His gaze narrowed. “You're playing with fire, you know that?”
She licked her lips, prepared to spout off another rebuttal but he muffled herâwith his mouth. His searing kiss was like a branding iron, melding his lips to hers. There was nothing tentative or exploratory about this kiss. It was possessive, commanding, and demanding a response she couldn't deny. She stiffened for only a second before surrendering to the sinful sensation of his hot tongue. He grew hungrier, more demanding, stoking the embers had been smoldering deep in her belly for hours.
Nikki sank into him as if liquefied. Clutching his shoulders she lost herself in the wet and wild tangle of tongues that fired ripples through her with every slick stroke. Her nipples tingled and her thighs clamped together against the agonizing ache. It had been ages since she'd been kissed like this. Hell, she wondered if she'd
ever
been kissed like this.
Only minutes ago, she'd been quivering with cold, but now she burned with want. If this was playing with fire, she wanted nothing more than to throw herself into the flames.
Moaning into his mouth, she took his collar in a death grip and ground against him with wicked abandon.
God, he felt so damn goodâall hard aroused male.
But it wasn't enough. Feeling like a lit torch on a puddle of gasoline, she ripped at his shirt buttons and yanked at his clothes, desperate for the feel of flesh on flesh.
He broke from the kiss looking as lost in lust as she felt. “Holy shit, sweetheart. Just hang on one minute, OK?”
Shedding his jacket and shirt with amazing speed, he dragged the two sleeping bags off the cots and zipped them together on the floor. He settled his long frame on the floor, stretching his hand out to her in invitation. The whole process had only taken him seconds, but the brief lull was enough for her stalled brain to kick back into gear.
What
are
you
doing, Nikki? Are you
crazy?
When she made no move toward him, he came to her, his breathing ragged and desire flaring in his hungry eyes. Cupping her face, he kissed her again, long and deep and seductive, releasing her slowly, reluctantly.
“You're reading too much into it, sweetheart,” he murmured. “You're freezing cold and I'm burning up. Why not let the ends justify the means?”
Once more, he'd left it to her. Sleeping with him would be like skydivingâ¦without a parachute. The free fall would be intoxicating, exhilaratingâbut the landing? She didn't even want to think about that! But as much as much as that thought terrified her, it would be nothing compared to the regret she'd suffer a month from now, wondering what
might
have been.
“Just let go, Nikki.” His tone was coaxing, his argument convincingâ¦almost irresistible. He drew her against him, this time enticing the seam of her mouth with more tantalizing flicks and darts of his tongue that obliterated reason.
Just
let
go.
Slanting his mouth over hers, he deepened the kiss. His hands mapped over her body with slow and deliberate caresses until coming to rest on her ass. His kiss grew more demanding, his thrusting and retreating tongue inciting a gush of liquid heat between her thighs.
Almost mindless with want, she broke from the kiss, dragging in a desperate lungful of air. “Promise me one thing, Wade.”
“Just name it, sweetheart,” he replied low and husky. “Right now, I'm likely to swear to just about anything.”
“Then swear you'll make this so damn good I won't regret it in the morning.”
His mouth molded into that sexy, dimpled grin. “Darlin', the only thing you're going to
regret
is putting me off for so long.”
“That's enough talk, cowboy. Time to put your money where your mouth is.”
* * *
Wade had a raging hard on, but still wouldn't press her any further if she didn't want it just as much as he did. He studied her intently, his blood roaring in his ears, until she gave him that cute little chin jut and dropped another gauntlet.
Thank
you
Jesus.
He exhaled in prayer and hauled her hard against him.
“Sweetheart, I'd rather put my mouthâ”