Slice and Dice (14 page)

“We’re going to be fine.” He moved toward her. “I just wish we had something to help us dry off. We could freeze to death in here.”

Another crack of thunder caused Sophie to jump.

Nathan put his arms around her. “Don’t worry, Soph. I won’t let anything hurt you … ever.”

As she turned her face up to his, a curious thing occurred. She’d been talking nonstop all afternoon, but now she couldn’t think of a thing to say.

“I love you,” he said softly. “I never stopped.”

“I know,” she whispered. “God, I know.”

“What are we going to do?”

When he kissed her, she felt helpless to resist. To be in his arms again seemed so right. And yet she pulled back. “Nathan, we can’t.”

“I know.” He turned away, the palm of his hand pressed hard against his forehead. Walking back to the window, he said, “We can’t get out of here until the storm lets up. This hall is connected to the living quarters. If I’m not mistaken, the brothers left a couple boxes behind. Maybe I can find a towel, a napkin. Anything we can dry ourselves off with.” He glanced at the stone fireplace in the corner. “I’ll get that going as soon as I come back. Will you be okay for a couple minutes?”

“I’m fine.”

He turned and looked at her, then disappeared through a door at the back.

Sophie gazed down at her dripping clothes, feeling miserable. Utterly loathsome. How could she have let him kiss her? She should never have come. She had to get her bearings. Sitting down on a bare wood bench, she tried to shake off the feel of his mouth against hers.

Nathan came back a few minutes later looking triumphant. “I found some tablecloths and a couple of the brothers’ cowls. We’ve got to get out of our wet clothes or we’ll catch pneumonia. Here,” he said, handing half of what he was carrying to her. “I’ll go back and get dressed in the living quarters. You can dry off here. Okay?”

She nodded, hoping this wasn’t another mistake.

“Get cracking. I want to start that fire ASAP.”

Sophie waited until she was alone, then quickly peeled off her wet clothes, dried herself, and slipped the cowl over her head, tying the braided belt around her waist. It was a soft wool, a little scratchy but warm. The only problem was her feet. The fieldstone floor was like walking on ice.

“Are you decent?” called Nathan a little while later, some of the natural humor back in his voice.

Sophie thought it would be idiotic to make a joke out of her answer, considering the situation they were in. “I’m dressed, but my toes have turned to icicles.”

“I’ve got just the answer to that.” He breezed into the room carrying a pair of thick white socks. “I found some for myself, too.”

Sophie tried them on. “Hmm. About five sizes too big. But who’s counting?” The cotton felt warm and soft against her tingling feet.

“Now,” said Nathan, opening a wooden box next to the fireplace. “Hey, we’re in luck. They left some logs and even some kindling.” In just a few short minutes, the fire blazed. Nathan spread a blanket he’d found in the living quarters on the floor in front of the open hearth and they both sat down to dry their hair. “Thunderstorms don’t last long. This one should be over soon.”

She nodded, feeling chilled to the bone. Glancing sideways at him, she said, “The fire feels good.”

“It smells good, too. I think it’s applewood. I love smoking ribs over an applewood fire.”

“Makes we wish we had some ribs.”

He laughed. “You could eat again so soon after our picnic?”

“It might help us warm up.”

He gave her a concerned look. “Not to worry. I’ve got just the thing.” He jumped up to find the picnic basket. After removing a bottle Sophie hadn’t seen before, he came back and sat down. “Cognac,” he said, pulling out the cork. “Sorry, I don’t have a clean glass. You’ll just have to drink from the bottle. It’ll give you that special ‘wino’ feeling we all know and love.”

She shot him a nasty look. She felt as if the champagne she’d drunk earlier had left her system during their mad dash to the main hall, so the cognac did sound appealing.

Nathan held the bottle out to her. “Come on, it will warm you clear to your toes. Since I’m the designated driver, it’s all yours.”

Gingerly, she took a sip. And then another. It did feel good going down. Relaxing. Calming. She hadn’t realized how tense she’d become.

“One more,” said Nathan.

She didn’t feel like arguing, so she took another swallow.

“Good. That should do it.” He pushed the cork back into the bottle, then set it aside. “Better?”

“Yes, I think so.”

He took hold of her hands. “Sophie, you’re shivering.”

When she looked into his eyes, she saw that he’d guessed the truth. She wasn’t shivering from the cold but from being so close to him again. She could control her intellect but not her emotions. Her body simply wasn’t cooperating.

Nathan gently put his arm around her, tipping her head back and kissing her again, this time with less urgency and far more tenderness. The kiss seemed to last forever. They lay back against the blanket, lost to everything but themselves.

“Sophie,” he whispered finally, his lips close to her ear, “I know you love your husband. I don’t want to interfere with that, but can’t we have today? Aren’t we due something after all these years?”

She had no answer.

“I just want to forget about everyone and everything and —” His mouth found hers again, this time more passionate, more searching.

Even though an important part of her didn’t want this to happen, she could feel her body responding. He’d already unzipped her cowl and slipped his hand inside, caressing her breasts, her bare skin. She moaned softly in his arms. “Nathan, we can’t.”

“I want you, Sophie. So badly.” His lips traveled down her neck, nibbling, biting, exploring.

It was like a dream. The fire. The strange building. The feel of him against her again. It seemed like they’d never been apart.

Suddenly, without warning, Nathan stopped and rolled away from her. “No” was all he said.

Sophie looked up at the wood timbers, feeling flushed and confused, her body still trembling from his touch. Closing her eyes, she knew he was right. She was glad he’d stopped because she wasn’t sure she would have stopped him. But even so, she still didn’t understand. “What’s wrong, Nathan?”

He sat up, hugging his knees to his chest. “If we do this, you’ll hate me. Not today maybe. But later. You won’t be able to look me in the eye ever again.”

“That’s not true. I wouldn’t hate you. But I might hate myself.”

“It’s all the same. I don’t want any of those feelings between us because I’ve made a decision.”

The ominousness of this pronouncement made her sit up. “What?”

“I want you, Sophie. Not just for a few horns but forever.” He held up his hand. “I know you’re married, but you didn’t know I was free when you married the guy. Now that we’ve found each other again, I’m not leaving. I’m staying in your life until you realize you love me more than you love what’s-his-name.”

“Bram.”

“Right.” He stared at her. “Well? Say something.”

“Do I have any choice in the matter?”

“Of course you do. You have the ultimate decision.”

“If I asked you to leave me alone — now, today — would you?”

He dropped his head against his knees. After a long moment he said, “Yes.” Looking up at her again, he added, “Is that what you’re asking?”

She felt as if her emotions were being torn into a million pieces. She was a middle-aged woman, for God’s sake. Her life should be stable. She shouldn’t have to make decisions like this. She couldn’t make a decision, not here, not now.

“Well?”

“I don’t know, Nathan. I don’t know what I want.” And that scared her, more than she could say.

“You’re telling me I have a chance then?”

“I’m telling you that I don’t know.”

“That’s enough. For now.”

Maybe he was happy with her response, but she wasn’t Glancing at the windows, she realized she’d barely looked outside since they’d come in from the storm.

“It’s stopped raining,” said Nathan, following her gaze to the courtyard.

“We can go.”

He nodded.

She didn’t get up. “It’s like … you’ve just turned my life upside down, like you’ve dumped all my precious treasures out on the ground and then stomped on them.”

“You’re saying you’d rather have my memory than me?”

“I don’t know. Maybe I would.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, covering her hand with his. “You’ve complicated my life, too. But I don’t think either of us can turn our back on what just happened. We have to find a way through this, whatever happens.”

She knew he was right, but she wasn’t any less confused.

As she rose to find her clothes and stuff them in her backpack, her cell phone rang. “What time is it?” She’d taken off her watch when she was drying off.

“Ten after five.”

“My God. I had no idea it was that late.” Stepping over to her backpack, she retrieved the phone and clicked it on. “This is Sophie.”

“Where the h… are…”

“Bram? Is that you?”

“You’re break … up … can’t under … aying …”

Damn. With everything that had happened last night, she’d forgotten to recharge the battery. She checked the warning light. Sure enough, it was low. “The battery’s going,” she said slowly, hoping he’d catch some of it.

Static. Then,”… get home right…”

“I should come home?”

More static. “Harry Hon … for Gil… murder.”

“What? Say that again?”

“Arrested! Harry …” The rest was unintelligible. “Where are you … waiting since fo … ids ben … night.”

“I’m not picking you up. Harry was arrested?”

“… es. This … diculous … Are … with Natha …”

“Yes, Nathan’s here. We’re fine.”

“… home!”

“I got that. I’ll be back in forty-five minutes.” She shut it off.

“Sounds like we’d better get going,” said Nathan, tying the shoelaces on his still soggy hiking boots. “If you want to pick up in here, I’ll go get the car. It’s a good mile and a half, but I’m a pretty fast runner, especially if I don’t have to carry anything. I’ll drive around to the main gate. Go out the side door and around the front of the building. You’ll see it about fifty yards in front of you.” He got up, straightening his cowl. “I guess we’re going to make a real fashion statement when we get back to the hotel.”

How was she going to explain
that
to Bram?

“You gonna be okay while I’m gone?”

“Just hurry, Nathan.”

Bram checked his reflection in the mirrored elevator just before the doors opened and he stepped off. For the last few hours, his impatience had been fighting with his concern and anger. Sophie had promised she’d be home by six. At least that’s what he thought he’d heard. The phone connection had been horrible. It was six-thirty now and she still wasn’t back. If she was forty-five minutes away, where had the two of them gone? It was supposed to be a lunch date, right? Not an all-day marathon.

Against his better judgment, Bram pictured a secluded cabin in the woods, where Nathan Buckridge kept his back issues of
Playboy,
his king-size waterbed, and his sex toys. Shaking off the image, he felt a wave of disgust overwhelm him. Why hadn’t Sophie kept him better informed? He shouldn’t have to wait around while his wife was out on the town with her ex-squeeze.

Entering the crowded lobby, his eyes swept the room. Still no sign of them. Bram had stuck around Sophie’s office until six — playing computer solitaire — then gone upstairs to get dressed for the AIDS benefit they were supposed to attend tonight. He hadn’t forgotten about it. He wondered if she had.

Noticing Lela Dexter sitting in a club chair reading a magazine, he eased behind one of the marble pillars and watched her for a few seconds. She looked exceptionally serious and beautiful tonight in her black dress and gold jewelry. At the same time, Bram knew that if he didn’t already know her, her remoteness would put him off. It was as if she wanted to be at the center of the action, but at the same time invisible. She also appeared nervous. She kept crossing and uncrossing her legs and every now and then would shoot a furtive glance around the lobby. It was almost as if she were trying to hide in plain sight, which made no sense at all. Snaking his way through the crowd waiting to be seated in the atrium — a string quartet was playing tonight — Bram stood over her, clearing his throat.

She turned a page, then looked up. “Well, if it isn’t my favorite matinee idol.” With a slow grin, she eyed his tux. “Going somewhere?”