Sleight (22 page)

I remembered the wet faces of the people around me, Ted and Marlene enveloped in their own cataclysmic reminder of their failures as parents and protectors.

I remembered taking the pain pil that Marlene pushed into my hand after Delia vanished.

I remembered Henry’s hand stroking my hair as I whimpered myself to sleep.

But what I couldn’t remember was how to forgive al the adults in my life who had so thoroughly screwed everything up, who’d lied to me to protect me when now, there was little any of them could do to make anything even remotely close to okay ever again, little any of them could do that would guarantee my survival.

Next to go is the precious jewel.

That was me.

Gemma. A precious jewel.

My father, with whom I should’ve been sharing a joyous reunion, was instead sharpening his scythe.

My father…my executioner.

:22:

I exist. I am alive. I am strong. I have awaked in peace…

— Chapter 154, Egyptian Book of the Dead, The Book of Going Forth By Day

“Morning,” I said. I puled the curtain back from my bunk.

Marlene and Irwin were seated at the table playing a lively round of “Go Fish” with a deck of Irwin’s Braile cards. The trailer was warm, almost too warm, and smeled of fresh coffee and some sort of baked heaven. The sun, bright through the trailer windows, had chased away the usual drizzle.

“Ah, she lives to see another day,” Irwin said, shifting on the bench to turn in my direction. Marlene put her cards face down and hopped up from the table.

“How’re you feeling, Gems?” She touched my forehead to check for signs of fever.

“Al right, I guess. My head hurts.”

“Rightfuly so,” Irwin said. “You gave us quite the scare last night, girlie.”

“Wel, you know, I figured there wasn’t enough going on around here already. Might as wel add some fresh drama to shake things up a bit.”

Marlene checked the bandage around my head. She reached for the prescription bottle and squinted at the label, her hand feeling around her chest for her reading glasses.

“What time is it?” I was afraid to sit upright yet to check the clock. Sudden change in blood pressure would mean more pounding in my head.

“It’s after 11,” Marlene said.

“You know, most kids don’t bash their heads open to get out of school. I used to hold the thermometer over a match.”

“And, tel me, Uncle Irwin, how did that work out for you?”

“It didn’t. But I busted enough thermometers over the years that I probably have mercury poisoning,” he laughed.

“Is it okay if I give your hair a little tidy? There’s dried blood in it and you can’t shower just yet,” Marlene said, pointing at the bandage.

“Just be gentle,” I said. Marlene retrieved a towel, a cup of hot water, and a comb from the bathroom. She started with the ends, dunking the comb into the water to wet the individual strands of hair. After just a few passes, the water in the cup took on a pinkish hue, flakes of dried blood clinging to the sides of the plastic cup.

“Where’s Henry?” The flowers he’d brought Wednesday were arranged on the shelf at the foot of my bed, their fragrance wafting through the room. Of course, I’d thought of him upon waking, but I’d also thought of a ton of other things. New things that had changed my future with alarming speed.

“He sat with you until you finaly drifted off. You were talking quite a bit in your sleep, so he was very concerned. He wanted to stay al night just to watch you breathe, but once we were sure you’d just had your fil and were out, I shooed him home. I’d say it had to have been close to 3,” Marlene said.

“It’s not safe for him there. He can’t go back to Lucian.” I sat up straighter. Delia’s poem warned that the boy—Henry—would die before his twentieth July. That was this year.

“He can’t stay here, though. Not yet. Lucian wil come looking for him.”

“So, more pretend? We just play along, even though everything is unraveling around us?”

Marlene’s cheeks sagged. For the first time, I noticed she was getting jowls. She looked exhausted, fragmented.

“I don’t know. I just don’t know.” Her words faltered at the end.

“Why didn’t anyone tel me? Why was this al such a big secret?

I mean, first the thing with Lucian and…Delia…but Ted is Henry’s dad? Didn’t you guys think this was pertinent information that I needed to have?” I was angry, but drained of the energy to get too worked up.

“Because. Lucian is very powerful. He knows that you are his daughter but legaly, he has to have a DNA test to prove it. We have never granted him that, to protect you and your mom. It just didn’t seem right,” she said. “And he’s had Henry. He knows what he’s after, and it isn’t candidacy as Father of the Year. Henry has been nothing more than ransom, for nineteen years,” she said.

“There’s nothing we’ve been able to do. Not without the book.”

“At least I now know why he really doesn’t want Henry and I seeing each other.”

Marlene nodded. She looked sad, sadder than I’d seen her since my mom’s funeral.

“How…? When did Lucian meet Delia?”

“She went to Europe. After Jonah died, she did some time in a hospital, and when she got out, she left. Went off the radar. She’d said something about being caled to him, that she had to find this mystery man in Europe. At the time, we didn’t know it was Lucian, but she began to plan for the trip when she was released from the hospital. She wrote me letters about this man she had to go find, that he was coming to her in her dreams.”

“She was having visions of him?” I said.

“She caled him her destiny, said that her voices were teling her she had to find him, that everything would be okay if she did. We didn’t understand. We thought it was her ilness caling the shots.” Marlene pressed the water from the lengths of my hair with the hand towel. “Gemma, I know I have a lot to apologize for. There is so much we’ve probably done wrong, with al of this, but you have to know that we made choices based on our desperation to keep you safe. And I know you have a lot of questions, but right now, you need to rest.”

“How’s Ted? Is he okay?”

“He’s managing. He’s working through it by running the crew’s tails off. You know Uncle Ted. Mr. Stoic. He’l talk when he’s ready, I’m sure.”

“That’s so weird…Ted is Henry’s father. And they both have known this for a long time?”

“We’ve al known. Since Ted brought Alicia to America, pregnant with Henry,” Marlene said. “But what could I do? I couldn’t lose Teddy again.”

“So you forgave him…”

She nodded, her face distant and melancholic.

“I loved him. I stil do.” Marlene had carried so much for so long. And to live knowing that her husband had fathered a child with another woman? It spoke volumes about Marlene’s character. I wondered if part of her was relieved that the secrets were finaly coming out of the shadows.

She stood to dump the cup of bloodied water into the sink.

“Henry asked if he could come back this afternoon, but I told him I’d check with you, see how you felt. You can cal him when you’re feeling up to it.”

“Thanks, Auntie.” My right shoulder was sore from the tetanus shot, and simply stretching my arm ached. I hoped it wouldn’t be too bothersome to get in the way of playing during Sunday’s performance. Then I remembered it was Friday today, which meant we had a show in just six hours’ time.

“What are you guys doing in here with me? It’s Friday. You have a show tonight!”

“We’ve got it handled,” Irwin said. “There’s less to do now that we’re settled in the stadium. And Uncle Ted insisted we hang out with the patient for the morning.”

“What’s the deal with the Roulette? Are we stil going through with it?” I was naïve to think that my twelve measly stitches, that al of this carnage would somehow give them pause to think about potential falout from a mishap in the show.

“Not tonight. That’s only for Sunday, so Auntie Mar gets a reprieve until then.” As my unhappiness hadn’t changed about them doing the Roulette act, I didn’t find Irwin’s humor amusing, especialy given the run of unfortunate luck during the prior twenty-four hours. I couldn’t deny the anxiety that had taken hold over the last couple days. Too much had occurred for me to joke around about Marlene being strapped to the turntable, offering herself up to the gods of chance.

“Uncle Ted has everything under control for tonight, and he wants me to hang out with you. Looks like we both get the night off, huh?” She opened the bottle of antibiotics and handed me one of the giant pils and a glass of water. “Drink up, sweetie. I have bagels here, too. You should eat something so the medicine doesn’t hurt your tummy. Oh, and here’s your cel phone. It was near you on the floor when we found you. It got some blood on it, but I cleaned it,” Marlene said as she handed me the phone. It smeled like rubbing alcohol.

“Umm, I’m sorry I broke into Ted’s cupboard.” Marlene patted the back of my hand. “I’m sorry I gave you a reason to.”

I desperately needed to relieve my near-bursting bladder. After that, I only wanted to curl up under my blanket and let the day pass me by. Marlene helped me in and out of the bathroom, and after I was resettled on my bed, I swalowed the hot pink pain pil, hopeful its effects would be swift and thorough. My brain was caling in a personal day.

:23:

Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend.

—Albert Camus

My cocoon of heavy, unconscious sleep was torn apart for good with the sounds of humanity arriving on the stadium grounds. Music blared over the new stadium speaker system, car doors slammed, voices of excited patrons filed the early evening air. Showtime had descended upon the Cinzio Traveling Players Company, and here I was, in bed, insulated from the frenetic energy surrounding my fiberglass cave.

“Knock, knock!” Junie opened the door and launched herself into the trailer, dressed to the nines in her performance get-up, chipper as ever. “Hey, Gems, how are you feeling? I wanted to come check on you before everything got too busy for me to escape.” She sat on the edge of my bed, careful not to look too closely at the bandage on my head.

“Hey, Joon,” I said, stil a bit groggy. “You ready for tonight?”

“Cha! It’s gonna rock, like it always does.” She was quiet, the jitters she felt before every show evident in the manic bouncing of her knees.

“Me and Ash have been so worried about you…um, does it hurt?” She pointed to my head and wrinkled up her face. Though nothing gory was visible, one would think by the fear in her eyes that my brains were oozing out of my eye sockets.

“It’s okay. I’m dealing.”

“Wel, I’ve missed you at school and at dinner. I’m so lonely without my sister… And, man, you should hear the stories floating around school about you and Henry. First his black eye, then your trip in the ambulance. I think this is waayyy more action than these smal-townies have seen in a while,” she laughed.

“Awesome. So I’m not missing much, I take it.” Ted’s voice boomed over the PA, welcoming guests to “a land of magic, spectacle, and the fantastical!” That was Junie’s cue to get into the arena.

“Shoot, that’s me. Gotta go, but I’m gonna come see you again when the show’s over, ’k?” She bounded to her feet and ran to the door. Upon blowing me a kiss goodbye, she vanished, in pursuit of adoring fans and jubilant adulation.

“Break a leg!” I holered after her. What a weird thing to say to someone who was about to wilingly climb three stories into the air and spin, untethered, around a swinging trapeze.

I sat up slowly to alow my head to avoid a rush of blood. It was after 6, and my body ached from lying stil for so long. Only a dul throb remained in the area surrounding my stitches, a vast improvement over how I’d felt last night. What a difference a day makes. Wel, a day plus the consumption of mind-numbing drugs.

Good times.

I picked up my cel phone to check for messages and was thriled to see Henry’s name on the top of the missed cals list. I was about to cal him back when there was another loud rap on the trailer door.

“Enter at your own risk,” I said, expecting to see another company member coming to check on me. Instead, the door opened, ushering in the scent of fresh popcorn and cotton candy.

An arm bearing another bouquet of flowers poked in through the door frame. I giggled when I saw the hand and the dark wool of the coat.

Henry, the rest of him, appeared before me in al his beautiful glory. “Some guy out there wanted me to bring these to you personaly.” He clicked the door closed behind him.

“Some guy, eh? Must be a very perceptive guy since they’re daffodils, my favs.”

“Huh. Maybe he’s your stalker. You famous performer types have to be so careful these days, you know. Starts off with daffodils and ends up with some guy in a trench coat hiding in your shower threatening to strangle your Chihuahua.”

“Good thing I don’t have a big bathroom. Or a Chihuahua.”

“And I don’t think I could strangle an elephant, so…” He smiled at me and placed the flowers on the table. His eyes sparkled in the pale sunlight that crept through the curtains.

“She’d strangle you first, I’m afraid. Sicko.”

“How’s my favorite patient today?” Henry sat on my bed and kissed my cheek. I turned my face so he’d kiss me again, on the lips this time.

“I’l be better when everyone stops asking me how I’m feeling,” I said.

“Ah, back to normal, I see.” A playful sparkle shone in his eyes as he wrapped his hands around mine.

“Sorry I missed your cal earlier. Marlene drugged me, so I’ve slept pretty much the whole day.”

“I know. I was just worried about you.”

“Thanks, Henry. No need to worry. You know, I’m usualy pretty invincible,” I puffed out my chest, “not normaly the sickly, pathetic damsel in distress who needs fussing over.”

“Sometimes it’s good to be fussed over. Besides, it gives your aunt something to do, and me too, not to mention it provides fodder for the gossip machine,” he said.

“Yeah, Junie mentioned we’re quite the topic of conversation these days.”

Henry laughed, looking at his hands in his lap. “According to Summer Day, we had a lover’s quarrel and you passed out after a night of binge drinking.”