Sleeping Jenny (20 page)

“No. I should. If anyone will understand, it'll be you.”

I swallowed hard, my tongue a dry wad in my mouth. Did I really want to know?

Jax straightened up, leaning back on his palms. He looked off into the canopy of trees. “One day I was flying to visit my grandmother on a Boeing 747, row twelve on the aisle. Hell, I can still taste the grape juice on my tongue. Feel the cool, recycled air coming from the vent above me. The next moment, I woke up in a hospital bed with everyone I knew long gone.”

“You're telling me you didn't choose to be frozen?”

Jax scrunched up his rounded nose in disgust. His eyes darkened. “No. Never in a thousand years would I want this. My family couldn't afford it, either. I wouldn't want them spending the money, to tell you the truth. I've done some research. Sophie's mother invested in the cryosleep process after the crash.” He shook his head, the corner of his eyes crinkling. “We fought so much. I thought she hated me.”

Jax dug a hole in the dirt with his boot. “Sadie. That was her name. Either she loved me, or she wanted Sophie to have someone in case something happened to her. Still, to this day, I'm not sure.”

“Geez, I thought my life was screwed up.”

“You're telling me. Imagine being taken in by your daughter's descendants, finding out she grew up without you.”

I couldn't imagine it. It was too awful. I couldn't be there for my parents and my brother, but Jax couldn't be there for the one person who needed him the most. What if my dad had been frozen? I would have missed him for the rest of my life, maybe even been angry at him for not being there when I needed him the most. Everyone I talked to had a story worse than mine. It was stupid for me to feel sorry for myself. “Jax, I'm so sorry.”

He waved my apology away. “I figured I'd have to tell you sometime if you joined.”

A voice buzzed from a keypad on his wrist. “Jax?”

“Yeah, I'm here.”

“We need you in the loading bay. Potential donors.” The voice fizzled out.

Jax sighed and clicked a button on the side. “I'll be right there.”

He stood and brushed the dirt off his black jumpsuit. An apologetic look softened his face. “You
will
join us, won't you? All this hasn't scared you away?”

I rose up, my legs aching after my impromptu run. “No. It's only made me more sure. I know I'm meant to be here to give these animals a second chance.”

Jax nodded and smiled. “I knew I could count on you. Come on, I'll show you to your hovercraft.”

As we left the jungle, one question still remained on my mind. I gathered my courage and spit it out before I could take it back. “Have they chosen the team for the mission to Paradise 15?”

Jax turned toward me with intensity in his eyes. “No. When they do, you'll know.”

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Surprise

I
sat alone on the hovercraft as it lifted from the bay and the panels screeched open above. Cluttered thoughts raced through my mind. I felt like I'd just eaten the biggest meal of my life and now my stomach had to digest it bite by bite. Jax stood below the sight panel, his hand raised as he watched me leave.

Did I want to be on the team?

Yara had called me a great candidate despite her apparent disdain for me, and Jax's intense response—
when they do, you'll know
—made it seem like I was a shoo-in. I knew I wanted in with the Timesurfers, but was deep-space expedition the right place for me? Maybe I was better tending to the animals they had brought back, or just being a donor and visiting from above.

A kernel of anger hardened inside me. That was my fear of cryos-leep talking. That wasn't the Jenny who wanted to travel on safari or journey across the arctic glaciers. I used to be so brave. Being frozen had turned me into a coward, stripped away everything I knew. It changed every aspect of my life, and I'd have to do it all over again. I'd lose everyone I'd gotten to know, gotten to care for—Valex, Pell, and Len. Maxim. Only this time, I'd do it by choice.

Heartache zapped my chest when Maxim's name crossed my mind. He wasn't mine, though. He had dreams of his own, and all I'd do is get in the way. Still, my skin tingled when I thought of our kiss. Besides petting Snow, it was the one perfect moment I'd had in this new, crazy world. I couldn't ignore my feelings, but I couldn't act on them, either.

Then there was Jax. He had really opened up to me in the jungle cell, but our pasts drove a wedge between us as much as they bonded us together. A deceased girlfriend who bought his unwanted cryosleep, a long-lost daughter he never saw grow up. That was some serious baggage, even if we were just going to be friends or coworkers. Besides, he'd thought of me as a potential coworker, a great representative for the team. Not a love interest. Jax and me— that was absurd.

I needed some serious time to think. When the hovercraft pulled up to the platform, I felt like I'd stepped back into the world too soon. Dragging my feet to Valex and Len's apartment, I reminded myself that they thought I'd been studying in the library with Maxim. Too solemn a face would give me away.

The doors parted into the walls and a chorus of “Surprise” rang out. I fell back into the hallway as streamers flew at my face. Pell jumped up and down next to another girl with curly brown hair and a clear tube running from her mouth to a small machine on her back. Valex and Len stood behind them with wide grins, holding noisemakers and polka-dotted party hats.

Pell jumped in front of me and grabbed my hand. “Come in, Jennifer. It's our birthday party.”

Streamers hung from wall to wall like a giant jellyfish was swimming above my head. Presents stood in a heap in the center next to a pink-frosted birthday cake I could smell from the doorway. I had to remind myself the sweet, strawberry smell was probably artificial, and the cake was probably made of more of that soycrap.

“Jennifer, meet Rainy.” Pell brought my hand to her friend's delicate little fingers. I knelt down in front of her and looked into her green-flecked eyes, shaking her hand gently. So beautiful. She looked like Angela's mini-me.

Guilt trickled through me like cold rain. I'd almost gotten in the way of Maxim and Exara. I'd almost left her homeless. No way could such a fragile-looking kid survive in those mold-choked lower levels with the crazies roaming around.

I shook her hand. “Nice to meet you, Rainy. You have pretty eyes.”

She giggled as she balanced on one foot, the other scraping the carpet with a yellow shoe. Her nebulizer hummed behind her in a low drone.

I wanted to hug her so bad, but I knew little kids were freaked out by strangers, so I let go of her hand and kept my arms by my sides. “Are you having fun?”

Maxim's sister stared at me with big, blinking eyes.

“Rainy doesn't like to talk.” Pell answered for her. “She has to take the breathing piece out of her mouth.

“Oh, I see.” I winked at her as I stood up. “Thanks for coming to the party.”

Pell turned on Pixie Swap on the wallscreen and Rainy jumped up and down.

“Next one who wins gets the first piece of cake.” Pell shouted as the pixies twirled on their lily pads. The two girls began another round.

“I hope you don't mind we combined your birthdays together.” Len approached me from the other side of the couch, offering me a party hat.

I took the hat, feeling the cheap plastic bend under my fingers. “'Course not.” In fact, I wished they hadn't celebrated mine at all. Rainy and Pell reminded me of Timmy and how I had missed so many of his birthdays. My heart felt like a paper in a shredder. Except, they didn't have paper any more.

Valex came over with a present the size of my miniscreen, wrapped in purple nylon and tied with a shimmery bow. “We got you something.”

I'd never had a chance to ask Pell what it was. “You didn't have to.” At three hundred and twenty, I was too old for birthday parties. Still, I strapped the hat on and played along.

“We wanted to.” Len put her arm around Valex as he held out the present.

I had to take it. Anything else would be rude. “Thank you.” “Open it.” Valex encouraged me with a smile. I ran my hands over the smooth wrapping, feeling a hard binding underneath. At least it wasn't another ugly tunic.

Carefully, I untied the bow. The wrapping slipped off onto the floor, revealing a thick, hardcover leather book with golden binding, like something you'd find in a medieval castle.

It was the first book I'd held in my hands since being frozen. All my homework and reading was done on my miniscreen. The realness of the cover and the weight of it in my arms felt so good. “I didn't think they had books anymore.”

“Open the cover.” Len nudged me with a gentle hand.

The book opened to a title page that read
Streetwater Family Tree
. I flipped through pages of pictures and names dating back to the eighteen-hundreds. Gertrude Streetwater had worked in the mills on the Merrimack River and her son, Milford, had started a shoe-repair business. There was a chapter on my family, and my finger brushed over a picture of my mom as mayor, cutting the ribbon in front of a new building with Dad standing by her side. Other pictures showed my dad at his massive mahogany desk, Timmy accepting his high-school diploma, and a newly established law firm with the title
Streetwater and Son
. Through the pictures I met Timmy's wife and his two children, a boy with reddish-blond hair and a girl with straight straw-blonde hair like mine. My breath caught in my throat as I read the inscription underneath her baby picture. Timmy had named her Jennifer May after me.

The book filled a small part of the giant hole of oblivion inside me, making me feel partially whole again. “This is wonderful.” My voice cracked, and I forced myself not to cry. It would upset Pell, and I didn't want to ruin her birthday.

“It was Len's idea.” Valex put his arm around his wife and they looked into each other's eyes, proud of their choice.

Len gave me a sympathetic smile. “We knew we couldn't buy you what you really wanted, so we opted for the closest thing to it.”

Valex reached out and flipped a chunk of pages. “It's an old family heirloom. Turn to page four hundred sixty-seven. We've made our own additions.”

My fingers shook slightly as I found the page. Valex and Len stood on the roof of a building underneath an arbor, the wind trailing Len's veil behind her white dress. “This is your wedding photo?”

Len nodded. “We wanted you to see how connected to us you are, and that we're not strangers but an offshoot of your immediate family.”

“We're more than that.” Valex interrupted. “We
are
your immediate family now.” A month ago, he would have sounded pushy, but after spending time with them, I kinda liked the idea.

Standing in front of Valex and Len, holding that family tree album, I realized what they really wanted was my love and happiness.

“Thank you.” I placed the album on the couch and rushed toward them. Wrapping my arms around both of them, I squeezed hard. It was the first time I felt like we were a real family.

Valex pulled away with watery eyes. “Ready to watch the entire twentieth year of
National Geographic?”

I pulled back, “You didn't!”

Len laughed, wiping her eyes. “We did. It took hours of searching the archives.”

Releasing them, I glanced at a dancing pixie on the screen. “Maybe after their next round. I wouldn't want to interrupt.”

“Of course.” Len moved toward the kitchen. “I'll get the knife and plates for cake.”

Valex moved to help her, but I grabbed his arm. “Hey.”

“Yeah?” He stood with his usual casual ease, like the world was everything it should be.

Before, his sunny ambivalence had annoyed me, but now I liked how he worked with what he had, taking my dad's law firm into the next century. His carefree nature came from Timmy. How could I be angry with him for who he was? “I know I haven't been the perfect daughter.”

Valex waved my concerns away. “Come on Jenny, that's not true. You've been a great sister to Pell. Look at her; she loves you.”

“That was easy. She's such a bright little girl.” I smiled and waved at her from across the room.

But I didn't want to talk about Pell. I hardened my resolve. It wasn't easy for me to bring up heavy topics, but I might not have another chance like this. “I mean to you and Len. I was so set on
not
wanting you to replace my parents.”

He placed his hand on my shoulder. “That's only natural. We know we can never replace what you had. Len and I just want the best for you. We're here if you need us. But you're a strong young lady, and it seems you don't need us much at all. You're doing just fine on your own.”

Was I? I felt like I'd stumbled my way through this strange future. His confidence in me gave me hope.

Len called to him from the kitchen, and Valex squeezed my shoulder. “I have full faith that you will find your way in this world.” He walked to the kitchen, and I stood in place in awe of his conviction.