Skinny Dipping (25 page)

All her clothes were hanging up, shoes orderly in the shoe rack. Her dresser was full – her underwear was folded neatly in the top drawer, singlets in the second, pajamas in the third.

Her desk was empty. A photo frame rested on her mantle, with a picture, one she hadn’t seen in quite a while – a family portrait, taken some time ago.

“Now all you need to do is tell your Mum that Derek and you are over,” Mickey commented. “It’s easy, repeat after me. ‘Hi, Mum. Derek and I broke up and we’re over…oh and I really want to sleep with my hot swimming coach.’”

Sophie laughed.

“Go on though. Derek and I broke up and we’re over.”

“Derek and I broke up and we’re over,” Sophie mimicked.

Mickey raised a glass of wine toward her. “See, you can do this. You’re moving on. I’m proud of you.”

Chapter 19

Christmas was practically on their doorstep with one month to go. Lights hung in Regent Street, dazzling crowds, creating a spirit over London shoppers. Hitting the shops wasn’t something Sophie had time to do; she was putting in extra hours trying to finish up her projects before the silly season started.

Pre-Christmas at the office was filled with the usual chaos of Desmond bellowing at his creative team and Flora screaming about copy. To escape from the office, Sophie would take five at lunchtime just to get a breath of fresh air before plunging back in.

There was one notable absence in her routine: Roger. Her Dad hadn’t spoken to her since their argument over his recruitment interview. The ache grew daily, Sophie feeling like she’d wronged him because she’d misunderstood him. The guilt grew, tying knots in her stomach.

A question kept haunting her, when was the right time to break someone’s trust? She might be hurting her Dad more by not letting her Mum know about his dire employment situation. Besides checking her bank balance, she couldn’t afford to keep the situation a secret much longer. After all, she was the one helping Roger out, paying her parents’ bills when she could. If Sophie ran out of money, there would be no where else to turn except to Edith, her sister, for help.

Worse was the memory of the policeman. His solemn expression as he stood in front of her, recommending her to take her Dad to see a doctor. The word ‘jumper’ echoed in her mind. What if she couldn’t help? Self-doubt seeped into her thoughts. What if the swimming wasn’t helping with his depression? She wasn’t a physician, she didn’t know about the mental state of people losing their jobs, she could only really provide support.

With a shaking hand, Sophie picked up the telephone, oscillating between telling or not telling. What was right and what was wrong?

“Hello,” Gloria Smart, her Mum’s voice croaked down the line.

“Hi, Mum, it’s Sophie. How are you?”

“Sweetheart,” Gloria’s voice wobbled. “I’m so glad you called. Are you at work?”

“Yes, is something wrong?”

“I don’t know how to say this.” There was a pause down the line, and Sophie could her Gloria hesitating, imagined her twisting her hands.

“What?” Sophie urged.

“It’s your father.”

“Yes?” She felt herself clutching the phone tightly, almost as if she’d strangle the receiver, waiting to hear the information from her mother.

“He’s been acting kind of strange lately.”

Sophie felt overwhelming frustration. “Oh?” She sighed.
No shit.
He’d lost his job, and not told her for months. “So what’s he been doing that’s so strange?”

“Swimming,” Gloria said, and a slight smile came to Sophie’s lips, at least he was still being active. That was positive. “He says he’s swimming.”

“I see.” Sophie was elated. Her father wasn’t premeditating jumping in front of a train at least. “What’s wrong with that?”

“He’s never been a swimmer.” Her voice was shrill. “People don’t just wake up one day and start hanging out at the local pool.”

Guilt began to wash over her. This was the opportunity to speak up, tell the truth. “Maybe he just wants to get into shape? Mid life crisis?” It was true, to a point.

“Mid life crisis?”

Sophie could hear her mother’s mind ticking over. “You think?” Sophie said.

“Yes..., yes..., a mid life crisis,” Gloria gushed. There was hope in her voice. “He’s also being so tight fisted. Like everything I buy, he’s on my case.”

“He’s probably worried about retirement. You should bring this all up with him.”

“You think I should simply talk to him.”

“Yes.”

“I might just do that.”

“So mid life crisis and retirement worries. It’s not all bad. Feeling better?” Sophie asked in a very small voice.

There was a pause. “I was beginning to think there was something seriously wrong, that he was having an affair or something.”

“Oh.” Sophie felt herself squeak. If she didn’t say something, their parents might ruin their relationship.

“There’s something else as well. Do you think you can speak to your Dad about Christmas? Your father is insisting that we keep it all low key. No turkey. No pudding. No big expenses. But your sister Edith, she’s so excited. She’s already booked a cottage for us all. The Grandkids are thrilled. I had all of these ideas….”

Sophie’s chest tightened, anxious about the cost of the cottage. Who was going to pay for this? She started gently. “Maybe Christmas at home would be easier.” Her voice remained flat. Besides, why hadn’t anyone consulted her about going to a cottage? Or booking it? Surely she was considered part of the family?

“I love Christmas, and a cottage would be such fun. Something different, you know.”

“Yes, but if Dad has an objection….” Despite the fact, he couldn’t pay for the cottage, maybe he just didn’t want to go?

“Please Sophie, could you chat with him?” There was desperation in Gloria’s voice.

Sophie felt a lump in her throat. The jobless state, the secret was eating them. “I’ll do my best. But I can’t promise anything,” she said stiffly.

“You’re not in cahoots with him, are you?”

“No,” Sophie said, quickly. Too quickly.

“Any word from Derek?” Her mother asked. “Any sign of an engagement ring? Do you think he’ll come up and visit for Christmas? We all love Derek.” Yeah, they all loved Derek more than her.

“Ah Mum, about that.” Notions of trust, honesty and communication circled round in her head. She needed to come clean, it wasn’t like she’d done something awful. She hadn’t told anyone about Derek initially because she thought they would get back together and wanted to save them temporary pain. But in the pit of her stomach, she knew they weren’t getting back together – and after the way Derek handled their break-up, it was for the best, really. She’d told Roger but obviously he had left her to tell Gloria, making her case weaker for dobbing in on him about his job situation. “Derek and I have broken up. I’ve moved out into a new flat.”

Silence followed down the phone line and remained for so long, that Sophie almost thought she’d been disconnected. Then she heard a wailing sound. “What happened? He was so lovely. I already bought him a Christmas present.”

“I’m sorry Mum. He wasn’t all that.” Sophie’s mind whirled with answers to give her mother. “I left him.” It wasn’t as simple as that, but that was the result of all the ultimatums. And he’d been seeing someone else.

It was too much for Gloria. She erupted down the phone. “You just ruin things! You’re just like your father,” Gloria shouted down the phone. Then a dial tone sounded – the end of the call.

***

Sophie sat on the pool step, waiting for Matthew to finish talking to a pretty girl. They’d had quite a few swimming lessons by now. A smile formed on his lips when his saw her. “Sophie.”

He came to the pool, sat on the step, next to her in the water. She was sure she could feel the hairs from his leg because they were sitting so closely.

“How have you been? Did Mickey help you move into your room properly, or are your boxes still where we left them on Saturday?” His gaze was playful.

“Yeah, Mickey came over, I unpacked.” She smiled, brightly. “My room is spotless.”

He roared with laugher, and Sophie couldn’t help but join in, thinking of Matthew standing, shocked, peering into her cluttered room. Her room was very different now, orderly, items in place. “I’ll believe it when I see it.” There was a twinkle in his eye. “How is Mickey?”

“She’s grand. You’re still okay to see Carol’s performance. I gave Eve the details, so she could remind you. We have a few more swimming lessons before hand.”

He nodded. “Looking forward to it.”

“I’ve got news. Gossip.” She raised her eyebrows, luring him in. His face came closer, about an inch from her. His expression registered curiosity, then interest, then he pulled back as an intense expression crossed his face. “I love gossip.” He tossed his head wistfully.

“Mickey’s friend Artie, from way back, is coming to the ballet, too, and Mickey’s so happy. She’s ecstatic!”

“That’s great news, right?”

“Excellent,” she cast a look over at him. “And what about you?”

“What about me?” he asked, the question seemed incredulous to him.

“Are you still worried? You were so stressed about your hotels?” This time she didn’t even bother to put a business development spin on it. After Bradley gave away her opportunity to pitch for Barney’s, why should she put work first, rather than whatever was happening here? For that matter, what was happening between them, close together in the water? Sitting with barely any light between them? Friendship? She didn’t want Matthew to think she was only friends with him because of his money.

He sighed, melodramatically. “Hotel guests are just idiots sometimes. They post bad reviews for no real reason. I don’t get it, but I have to fix it or no one will visit my hotels anymore. But it’s just boring business.” He shrugged his shoulders. “Shall we?” he indicated to the water.

She shrugged. “Sometimes it’s nice to just sit, and chat. But if I do that, how will you get to be a drill sergeant and teach me new swimming skills, techniques and challenges?”

“Exactly.” He thrust himself off the pool step and into the water.

The lesson started almost exactly the same as the one before. First bobs of every description and then floating. Every time she lifted her legs up, her body spasmed with fear.

Then his face transformed and his eyes lit up – an expression she was becoming to know and dread. “We’re going to do something new,” he said. Matthew was determined. “I’m going to teach you the flutter kick.” He brought the trusty kickboard from the edge of the pool. “I would like you to watch my legs. This is what we’re aiming for.”

He thrust himself off the edge of the pool, his muscular arms extended forward as he held the kickboard. He put his face in the water and began kicking, churning up the water with his feet. When he stopped and stood up in the middle of the pool, he was about ten feet away. “Are you still watching?”

“Yes,” she said, nodding; she really had been watching him, watching his dreamy body. As he swam back, she concentrated on what he was doing and not just on how he looked, watching the way the feet went up and down in the water.

“Did you see what I just did?” He wasn’t even breathless, when he returned to where she sat on the step.

“Yes,” she said slowly.

“Think of how quickly a butterfly flutters its wings. I need you to do short, quick little kicks, churning up the water. Fluttering.”

There was a lot of fluttering going on here because her chest was fluttering. “I see.”

“Kick from the hip and not from the knee. It’s a whole leg exercise.” Must be excellent for her thighs. She swallowed, there was one issue, the obvious one, he was kicking his way to the blooming middle of the pool.

Like a show reel, memories of drowning slid into her mind. Surely, he must realise that she wasn’t a middle-of-the-pool kind of girl yet. Her head in the water, choking.

A list of profanities went through her mind. “Let’s do it,” she said with renewed ferocity. She would beat this fear. With a tight grip on the kickboard, the familiar dread washed over her. She was rooted to the spot, looking at the water, then back at Matthew, then to the water.

There was warmth in Matthew’s face. “Today is your lucky day,” he said softly.

Sophie roared with laughter, so loudly, that children splashing on the other side of the pool stopped to watch her. “Then why don’t I feel at all lucky.”

Something told her luck was not playing any part of this swimming session. Luck happened when you were at the casino, playing roulette or black jack. Luck happened when you won Lotto. Luck happened when you got to work on time because all the tubes were running smoothly, and didn’t break down in peak hour.

“Lucky for you, because you’re going to use the kickboard but will do the exercise over the step.”

She looked at the step beneath her feet, and a feeling of immense gratitude filled her.
Oh trusty step!
How close they’d become. First the floating and now flutter kicking.

Matthew issued his hideous instructions. “Hold the kickboard out in front of you and plant your face in the water. I’ll help hold the board initially, to help stop the wobbling. I’ll be standing right next to you. How does that sound?” He was so eager, he really wanted her to succeed.

“Great,” she said with a grimace, then quickly face-planted into the water, leaving no time to think about what she was doing, hovering over the step with the kickboard in front of her. The sensation of suffocating was overwhelming. Her legs sailed up and her stomach somersaulted like she was on a rollercoaster. The kickboard was like an animal, and she was the trainer. She fought to gain control of the board as it wobbled and wriggled in her grip. She threw off a surge of panic.
I can do this. I will be the kickboard’s master. I will be in control.

Besides, Matthew made it look so easy. She felt a slight pressure on the board. Matthew was doing exactly what he’d promised. One of the rare people, a man even, who actually did what he said. A good guy. Although, he might be still hung up on his ex-girlfriend, it didn’t stop them from being friends.