Skeletons of Us (Unquiet Mind Book 2) (13 page)

Mom’s eyes softened slightly and she slowly lowered the scissors.

My eyes narrowed between the both of them. “Mom’s condition?” I repeated.

Mom raised the scissors again. “What part of,
don’t tell Lexie
did you not understand?” she hissed at him.

“Mom,” I warned.

She sighed dramatically. “It’s nothing for you to worry about.”

I glanced at Zane, whose face was blank but a muscle ticked in his jaw. Mom looked to him too, this time pulling the scissors across her throat in a warning gesture. That didn’t work because Zane looked to me.

“Your mom has preeclampsia,” he bit out. “Which means she can’t be doing anything that will raise her blood pressure. She shouldn’t even be on her feet for extended periods of time. She sure as shit shouldn’t be going into any fuckin’ high-risk situation.”

Mom scowled at him. “You’re exaggerating. And I’m basically not on my feet. Hardly ever.”

I blanched, the blood draining out of my face. Worry washed through me. I knew what preeclampsia was. I knew what the risks were. Unbidden, the memory of that day at the hospital hurtled into my mind. The day when I thought I might lose Mom, my little brother, and Zane too. Because I knew if anything happened to Mom, there would be no coming back for him.

“Mom?” I said in a small voice. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Her face softened. “We only just found out. It’s not like things are exactly calm with you right now. You didn’t need to worry about your mom. You’ve gone through enough.”

I stepped forward, clasping her hands, thrusting the nail scissors away. “I’m okay. Apart from being mad and worried about my mom and my brother or sister. I’m okay. But I’m not happy about you keeping secrets. Listen to your husband,” I instructed.

She pouted. “Not fair. My firstborn and my hubby are ganging up on me. It’s mutiny. Cruel. I need someone on my side.” She looked to Noah, who was leaning against the wall, watching the scene with a blank face. Though he glared daggers at Killian at regular intervals. I knew Killian’s gaze hadn’t flickered from me the entire time. His eyes were like a physical touch running over my body. I did everything I could to ignore them.

Noah held up his hands. “Staying far, far away from this one,” he said to Mom. He looked to his watchless hand. “In fact, it’s time for me to head to bed.” His gaze went to me. “You goin’ to be okay, babe?”

“She’ll be fine,” Killian clipped, his jaw hard.

Noah’s head snapped to him and he looked like he might try and lunge for the gun he had tucked in the front of his pants.

“I’ll be fine, Noe,” I interjected quickly before there was any bloodshed. That didn’t mean I wasn’t superbly pissed at Killian answering for me. At him being in my room. Acting like it was where he belonged. As if the past years were some sort of nightmare.

I wished they had been. But they weren’t. Reality was sometimes worse than most nightmares. More complicated too.

Noah gave Killian one more warning look and jerked his head to Zane before exiting.

“Back to bed. Now,” Zane ordered Mom, stepping forward to put his large tattooed hand on her baby bump.

“I’ll go to bed when I’m satisfied my child is okay,” she snapped, though her gaze melted slightly with Zane’s touch.

“Mom, bed,” I told her.

She blew her hair out of her eyes. “My child telling me to go to bed. Pretty sure it’s meant to be the other way around. Just because you’re some sort of famous rock star you can’t get everything you want.”

“Mom.”

She rolled her eyes. “Okay, okay. But I’ll tell you, it doesn’t matter how many Grammy’s you have, I’m still your momma.”

My eyes watered slightly. “You’ll always be my momma.”

She leaned forward and kissed my head. “You sure you don’t want me to stay in here with you?”

I nodded. Zane looked like he might blow a vein in his head. I knew how much he worried for Mom, but I also knew how much he worried for me. I didn’t need him stressing about my state of mind. Therefore, I needed to put on a convincing act that would be worthy of an Oscar.

“I’m fine. Go to bed.”

She gave me a searching look. “Fine.” She gave Zane a glare before waltzing out. She pointedly ignored Killian. No love lost there.

Zane’s shrewd eyes didn’t miss a thing. “You sure you’re okay, Lex?” he asked. “You’re safe here, with us, you know that right? We won’t let anything happen to you.”

I nodded. I’d been doing it far too much and my head was starting to throb from the motion. “I know.” My body may have been safe, my physical well-being, but my emotional health was another story. The gaze coming from the doorway promised hurt. A lot of it. It promised a bleeding heart that would never heal if he stayed in my presence any longer. I’d be rectifying that situation in the morning. After coffee. And, hopefully, after some kind of sleep.

Zane nodded. “You need sleep. I got your mom. Don’t worry about her. Tomorrow, we get you sorted.”

He leaned in and kissed my head before striding out of the room. He paused to lean in and mutter one word to Killian, one I couldn’t hear before he left.

And then it was just me and Killian. In my room. Alone. I tried to suck in a breath, but it was like when everyone left they took the oxygen with them.

Killian’s eyes blazed into mine. His face may have been empty, but his eyes weren’t. I couldn’t stand the look in them.

He stepped forward.

“Don’t,” my broken voice pleaded.

He froze the moment I spoke.

“You need to—I can’t do this right now.” Whatever this was. A cruel karmic joke? “I need sleep.”

There was a long silence after I spoke. A yawning one. As if a chasm had opened up in the room and our electricity and every feeling lurking underneath the surface fed into it, in danger of sucking every broken piece of me into it.

He nodded, saving my destruction for the time being. “Tomorrow, freckles,” he promised before leaving the room and closing the door quietly behind him.

It was the last word that did it, that made my knees buckle and cut that last frayed thread that was holding me together. I collapsed on the floor, leaning against the bed, and tried my best to muffle the tearless sobs that escaped from my broken body.

“Are you fricking high?” I all but spat at my stepfather. “I mean, your pupils don’t look dilated and I’m pretty sure that ‘I’m a total badass who must be in control of everything’ mantra you live by might recommend against mind-altering substances, but this is the only reason I can come up with for you suggesting this. You’re as high as kite. Or you’ve got some kind of temporary insanity thing going on.”

Zane’s face betrayed nothing, apart from, unfortunately, sanity. “I know you don’t like it, Lexie. But it’s your only option.”

I sucked in a breath. “Agree to disagree there, buddy.” A lance of pain rippled through me as soon as I spoke, remembering who I used to say that with. The boy in the corner who was sitting stoically, eyes on me. Face blank. The boy who broke my heart. Ground it up. The boy who was now a man, one I barely recognized, apart from those eyes. The man who Zane was informing me would serve as my bodyguard. Over my cold, dead body.

“I have a lot of options,” I continued, standing from the sofa. It was embroidered with patterned vintage fabric, scattered with mismatched cushions and totally went with the rustic boho atheistic we had going with our beach house in Malibu. The one that was big enough to house the entire band, plus guests and have a studio in the pool house. But one that still felt cozy at the same time, giving the most breathtaking view out of the French doors that opened off the living room we were currently sitting in. The tranquility of the ocean was beyond those doors.

Though not even the ocean could give me tranquility right now. I needed a valium. Or five.

“If you haven’t noticed, I’m kind of famous,” I informed Zane. I waved my arms around the expertly decorated living room, with jumbled frames scattered everywhere, pictures of the band over the years. A platinum album was mounted in the biggest frame, all the others surrounding it. “I also have enough money to hire the best security team in L.A., in the country, should I decide I need it.”

“Should you decide?” Killian spoke for the first time since I’d emerged, puffy eyed and zombielike into the living room earlier.

Noah had thrust coffee at me when I padded into the room after a sleepless night. “You’re gonna need this,” he muttered, his eyes stormy.

Sam was behind him, his face even more cloaked in fury. “I took it upon myself to make it Irish.” He noted my brows raising and the way my hand extended to give it to him. He gently pushed the mug back to my chest. “Trust me, caffeine is not enough to get you through this. I’ve already had three.”

I looked to Noah, who nodded tightly.

Shit.

That was when Zane directed me and the boys into the living room, where Mark and Jenna were sitting. Mark’s attire was casual like usual, a white linen shirt, whitewashed jeans, and white chucks. But his tanned and lined face was hard.

Jenna was as expertly put together as usual, in a blood-red, skintight dress, and Louboutin’s. Her thoroughly made-up face was pinched.

“This can’t be good,” I muttered, sipping my cup, flinching at the strong whisky aftertaste.

I was about to set the cup down, despite Sam’s insistence I needed it, that was until I glimpsed Killian standing at the edge of the room, his arms crossed, looking out to the ocean. His jaw was hard and my gaze trailed along those arms, which had grown in size and were now covered in ink. Unfamiliar. Foreign.

As if he sensed me, I was faced with the only thing that showed me that boy was now the man in front of me. Ice blue eyes.

They saw into me. Travelled through the managed remains of my soul to cause fresh agony with just the touch of his stare.

I took another gulp of coffee. Then another.

That took us to now, after Zane had just announced Killian would be my new security for the foreseeable future. Mom wasn’t here. She was having a checkup that Zane ordered, partly to get her out of the house for this conversation but mostly because he loved her more than life and worried about her. He and I both.

“Should you decide?” Killian repeated, his body taut. “You were almost fuckin’
killed
last night, Lexie. This guy’s been stalkin’ you for fuckin’
months
. Watching you sleep. Stabbin’ people to get to you. There’s no fuckin’ ‘should’ about this.”

My anger ignited like dynamite at his words. “I know!” I screamed. “You don’t need to remind me that it’s all my fault that one of my friends is lying in a hospital bed. But you’ve got nothing to do with my life. You aren’t a part of it any more. That was your choice, remember?” Killian flinched, but I kept speaking. “So you have
no fucking right
to come into my life after four years, making declarations about what you think I need. Because I only need one thing right now, for you to get out of my house.”

Sam snapped up. “I’ll see to that,” he volunteered immediately.

I crossed my arms, mainly to make sure no one saw my hands were shaking.

“Stop,” Zane commanded when Sam took a step toward Killian, who stiffened even more.

Reluctantly, Sam did so. He stayed where he was, standing between me and Killian, as if his body could shield me from his presence. Not even twenty feet of titanium could do that.

Zane stood to come in front of me. He cupped my face. “You can buy the best security money can buy, I’m sure of that, Lex, but you can’t buy loyalty. You can’t buy someone who would protect you with their last breath.”

My heart stuttered. He couldn’t mean Killian. Someone who protected you with their last breath didn’t break you into a million pieces.

“I’d stay in a heartbeat. This fucks with me, not being able to be here making sure my girl stays safe.” He took a breath. “But if I do that, your mom will have to know this wasn’t just a botched robbery. She would have to know the truth. Any other day, I’d never lie to Mia. About anything. But this news could mean dangerous things for her. For my kid. So I can’t. Can’t take those kinds of risks with them. And there’s Rocko. We can’t bring him here. Into this.” He jerked his head around. I knew he didn’t mean the luxurious beach house we were currently residing in. He meant the situation where I had a murderous stalker who would apparently hurt anyone to get to me. I tasted bile at the thought of my chubby-cheeked little brother being in any kind of danger.

Because of me.

Of having to wait in another hospital while my mom and little brother or sister fought for their lives.

Because of me.

Of my mom dying. Losing her baby.

Because of me.

“Okay,” I said quietly.

Zane’s eyes flared in shock and I heard a chorus of curses from each of my boys. Zane nodded and kissed my head. He didn’t say anything. Everything was in the look. He knew what this meant for me, the pain. I could tell he cared, that it messed with him. But I could also tell it didn’t mess with him enough to put my safety in the hands of a stranger. A highly trained stranger no doubt, but a stranger nonetheless. Killian was a brother in arms. A patched member of the club that meant everything to him. Killian had taken bullets for me before, saved my life before. I knew that was why Zane was insisting on this.