Sizzle (27 page)

Her sweet tears.

“Don’t send me away,” she whispers into my shoulder.

Why the hell is she doing this? “Celina, God, you can’t be here.” It’s all I can say. She begins kissing my throat and pulling aside the collar of the pullover shirt I’m wearing. Moon said no suits at the meeting with Dax, so I didn’t wear a fucking suit. Civilized men don’t conduct business in jeans and pullovers. Fuck me, civilized women don’t bite hard enough to leave a mark either.

Fuck it.

I pick her up and carry her to my room. I’ll send her away later. Much later. I’ll also spank her ass for doing this.

Later.

The sounds she makes almost make me come in my pants. I rip her shirt in my haste to get it off. Her bra, pants, and panties follow in seconds. I toe my shoes off and bring the shirt over my head while Celina struggles with my jeans. I push her back on the bed and kick off my pants myself. I place my knee between her legs and my hands beside her head as I try to catch my breath and process that this isn’t a dream.

She’s here. She’s real.

She lifts a hand to my jaw and runs her fingers over my chin. “I drove to Washington, took a flight to Florida and then a flight to Phoenix. I made sure no one followed me. I would never jeopardize your sister and her family.”

Hell. That was the last thing I was thinking of.

“How about you put your mouth to good use and fucking kiss me,” I say as I lower my head. Her eyes are huge and her lips the cherry red I’ve dreamed about. She waits for my lips to meet hers. I drown in her taste. Six months I’ve stayed away and it’s practically killed me. Instead, she comes here.

Her fingers clench my biceps, her nails dig into my skin. I. Must. Be. Inside. Her. I break the kiss and rear back. On my knees, I lift her hips so her legs are over the tops of my thighs. Her crystal blue eyes are open and expressive. I line my cock to her entrance and slowly slide inside her. She’s the sizzling heat I crave. She gasps as I push deeper.

Her shoulders and head are against the pillows, her ass off the bed. “Touch your breasts,” I whisper raggedly.

Her neck arches and her palms cover her breasts. I slowly pull my cock out and then push back in. Her body stretches to accommodate me. So tight. So perfect.

“I love you, Alex.”

I say nothing. I want her desperate. I want her needing me to quicken my pace. I just fucking want her to want me as badly as I want her. I keep it slow and fight harder to do it than I’ve ever needed to. Her lips turn up and the smile she gives me is almost more than I can bear. She knows how I like it and she doesn’t beg me to take her faster even though I see the burning need in her eyes.

Slow, controlled, crazy. That’s how it should be.

She clenches around me and her smile grows. I slap her ass and she squeals with the sharp pain. It shouldn’t be like this—like we’ve been together these past six months. We both feel the desperation and need the explosion of release. The dance is better for waiting. I’ve always known that and it looks like my little tiger has discovered the secret too.

She closes her eyes for a moment and when they open, the blue of her irises are darker. She pinches her nipples and I dig my fingers into the soft flesh of her ass. She grits her teeth and my smile grows. “Admit you love me,” she says.

“How could you not know?” I ask with my own smile.

More tears slip from her eyes and it kills me to see them. “You ready?” I groan.

“Always.”

I throw my head back and slam her onto my dick as I thrust into her. I would swear my huge monstrosity of a bed would never move, but I’m pounding into her so hard the bed rocks. This is why the slow buildup is so fucking good. My control is gone and my vision blurs. The sounds we make fill the room—wet bodies, heavy groans, her sweet sighs. She fists her hair when she’s close to orgasm and I smooth my hand along the crevice of her ass and slide one finger inside. She cries out louder and I jerk her against me and hold her while her body comes undone. When she quiets, I pick up the pace again until my cock unleashes into her.

Time stands still as I claim the woman who holds my heart.

Celina

HE LOVES ME. NO
, he hasn’t said the words but he’s come close enough for now. We’re curled together, his arms tight around me. I had no idea what to expect when I showed up. Had he moved on? Would he still want me if he hadn’t moved on?

It took everything I had to be brave enough to come back to him. I’m glad I went away. I had things I had to learn about myself. I’m much stronger than I ever gave myself credit for. I can be stronger still. Strong enough to hold us together and fight for this incredible man. Fight him so I can stay.

“You’re leaving in the morning,” he whispers in my ear. “You can’t come back.”

This is what I’m talking about. I turn over and move my hair aside so I can see him. “You can’t make me leave this time.” I hope he hears the finality in the words.

“Christ,” he says and turns his head so he isn’t looking at me.

My fingers curl against the skin on his chest. Slowly, I dig my nails in. I know it hurts him, but he’s hurting both of us. My hand is over the scar from the bullet. It’s still slightly red. I want him to look at me, so I dig in a little harder. I let up when he meets my eyes again.

“Kiley,” he says. “This is no place for a child. I can’t do it, Celina.” He slides his fingers through my hair and palms the side of my head. “I can’t endanger you and Kiley because of who I am. I won’t.”

“You’re right. Kiley can’t be here. She’s happy. Happy where she is. She doesn’t need me. She’s adjusting—” I close my eyes and try to stop the tears. When I open them, Alex’s eyes are darker. “She has my mother and hasn’t needed me since we went for her. She has a pet cat, my mother, and your sister. I was never who she needed. I’ve come to accept that.”

He pulls me closer and rolls to his back so my head is resting on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Celina. She just doesn’t know how to show her love yet.”

I shake my head slightly. “No. She can. She shows it to a lot of people. I can live with knowing she’s happy. The person I need is here with me now. Please, Alex,” my throat catches. “Want me.”

I’ve poured out my heart, but he remains silent. That says it all. I finally push away and rise from the bed, and he lets me. “I’m not leaving Phoenix. I’m here to stay. It doesn’t matter if you don’t want me.” I don’t bother wiping away the tears. “I started school again and I’m transferring here. I’ll work in the Phoenix area when I graduate.” He looks angry. I place my hands on my hips. “You can’t stop me.”

He groans in frustration. “You’re not safe here.”

I tilt my chin up and refuse to give in. I’m as vulnerable as a woman can be—naked, giving him my heart with no shame while he pushes me away. I will not let up.

He stands up and eliminates the space between us. He doesn’t touch me. He lifts his fingers until they’re in front of my face. “These hands kill people, Celina. They pound them until they’re bloody scraps of meat. These hands. You have no idea what I do with these hands.”

I place my fingers over his. His are so large and mine so small. His dark, mine light. It’s a beautiful combination. “Then tell me, Alex. Tell me what you do. Explain it to me. You’re a good man.” I lift his hands to my mouth and kiss them. “I’ve seen the good in you. You would only kill to protect the people you love. The same way Cal shot that woman. You have a right to protect the people you love.”

He pulls his hands away and steps back. He grabs his pants off the floor and pulls them on. “You have no idea what you’re saying. You live in a world of rainbows and unicorns.” He’s spitting mad, but so am I.

I jerk the sheet off the bed and cover myself. “Then tell me. Let me make my own choice. Tell me what you do and who you are. I know you kill people, but I don’t know why.”

He paces a few feet away and turns. “Drugs, guns, money. More money than you can imagine. Fucking money, Celina. We line our pockets with it.” He waves his hands above him. “We pay for this place. We pay off cops. We pay the salaries of other killers. That’s who and what I am. You can’t romanticize that. Hell.” He runs his hands over his head and turns away.

I drop the sheet and move in behind him. I circle his stomach, but he stays frozen. “You think I hadn’t guessed these things. Now I know them for fact. I don’t like it, but I love you.” I lay my head against his back. “I will compromise for you. That’s what you do when you love someone.”

He breaks my hold easily and spins around. He grabs my shoulders in a tight punishing grip. I hate the sound of the laugh he makes. “Compromise. That’s what you think it takes to be with me. I’d just killed someone when I came to you that first time.”

I cut him off. “You risked your life for me and Kiley and my mom. Gabriella too. You were willing to die for us. How can that be a bad thing?”

“You’re not listening. I killed a man with my bare hands and then touched you with the same hands a few hours later. I involved you in the death of another man when we went after Kiley. What kind of man does that?” His voice lowers. “When I beat a man to death, he’s tied up. He doesn’t stand a chance. The blood that drips from my hands is coward’s blood.”

I stomp my foot not caring how ridiculous I look. He doesn’t get it. “Bullshit. If it bothers you, then untie him. Give him a fair fight before you kill him.”

His groan says so much. He thinks I don’t understand, but I do. “I’m going to nursing school, Alex. I never want to feel helpless again if and when you’re shot. I know the world I’m choosing. If you send me away, I’ll finish school and come back when I’m done. I’ll ask Moon for a job if you won’t keep me. Hell, I’ll clean this house, clean the pool, scrub the fucking toilets if that’s what it takes to stay near you. That’s what you do when you love someone. You compromise. You beg when the man you love is too stubborn to see what’s right in front of him.”

I have nothing left and go to my knees. I stare up at him. “I’m begging. Don’t send me away. Please. I love you.”

I stay that way and wait. I see his anguish and it gives me hope. My heart speeds up when he slowly lowers himself to his knees in front of me. There is so much pain in his eyes. “Tell me, Alex,” I whisper. “Tell me so I know it all.” I place my palm on his heart and feel the steady beat.

“I see them,” he says. “I see all of them. Each person in my life who’s died. Each person I’ve killed. All the blood. They visit me at night. I barely sleep. It’s been this way for years. They haunt me for the things I’ve done.” His head drops and his tears splash to the tile.

I lean in and he wraps his arms around me. My hand is between us and I hold it there.

“I love you,” he whispers. “Please don’t ask me to risk your life and turn you into more blood on my hands.”

“I’m not asking.” I kiss the scar on his chest. “Your blood is my blood. I’m already here and I’m safer with you than without you. Give in, Alex, you can’t win this argument.”

He pulls me closer. “God, I love you,” he repeats.

“Good.” I breathe him in and tell him the truth. “I signed everything over to my mom. All the money, the house we bought, even my car. I’m homeless and penniless and the only way I could possibly pay for my schooling is to work for the escort service.”

He laughs into my hair. “Over my dead body.”

I’m able to breathe again. “I’m glad because I wasn’t very good at it.”

He pulls away and looks at me. “I think you were too good.”

“That may be the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me,” I say with a grin through fresh tears.

“Well, maybe you could use some work on your oral skills.”

He’s teasing me and I love him more for it. My hands go to the button of his jeans. “I was hoping you could give me pointers.”

He stops me. “I love you. I don’t want anything bad happening to you.”

“Then we both want the same thing.” He releases my hands and I slide his zipper down.

He closes his eyes and when he opens them, I see so much love. “You’re the good, Celina. Too good for me, but I’m selfish and I want you.” His smile is magnificent. “Poor oral skills and all.”

I take his erection into my hand. “Hmm, I’ll work very, very hard under your direction.”

Our kiss sizzles and travels to all the parts of me that want him so badly. My heart first and then the juncture of my thighs and my breasts.