Sins of the Flesh (34 page)

“Not a one. I'm going to watch Willie open his Christmas bone and then I'll open the present I bought myself and that's it.”

“Spend it with me, then. Stay after the party. I need…I'd like to talk to you…about…Will you stay? If you have to get back to Willie, I can come with you,” Jane said desperately.

Bebe shrugged. “I can stay until breakfast, but aren't you going to be spending the evening with Daniel and…Nellie? I more or less thought that the four of you, including Philippe, would be together since everyone is predicting you'll all be a family soon.”

“No, I've no plans to spend Christmas with…I mean, I'd rather be with you—thanks, Bebe. I…appreciate it. Look, I have to circulate. Daniel is on the sofa over there, just make yourself at home. I'll see you later. Bless your heart, Bebe, for…We'll talk afterward.” The red dress swished out of sight and Bebe was left alone with a goblet of ginger ale in her hand.

She walked around the room, speaking to electricians and cameramen, shaking hands with their wives and smiling. This was a social gathering and it was almost Christmas. Here she was simply a guest, not the head of the studio. She enjoyed the feeling.

This was the first time she'd been in Jane's house. Compared with Reuben's canyon mansion and her estate, this was small. It wasn't elegant, but it was pretty and comfortable and reflected Jane's taste and personality. Everything was old, but not shabby. Again the word
comfort
sprang to mind. There was nothing ostentatious about Jane's house, just as there was nothing phony about Jane.

Bebe meandered over to the huge Christmas tree, delaying the moment when she would have to join Daniel and his daughter and her son on the sofa. Why were they sitting there like outcasts, she wondered. And why wasn't Jane…Releasing her puzzling thoughts, she inhaled the fragrance from Jane's tree and felt tears sting her eyes as she remembered another Christmas many years before. A Christmas with Reuben, Mickey, and Daniel. They'd decorated the tree together. Reuben was poised on the top step of the ladder getting ready to place the Christmas angel, and he'd asked her to hand it to him. When she'd climbed up the ladder, their hands had touched and their eyes had met. She would never forget that heady moment because she was already in love with him, and it was one of the rare occasions when he'd really noticed her and reacted to her as a woman. No, she would never forget that moment.
Where are you, Reuben, on this Christmas Eve,
her heart cried.

A moment later she approached the sofa. “Merry Christmas, Daniel. I was wondering as I stood by the tree if you remembered that last Christmas in France.”

Daniel stood and wrapped Bebe in his arms. “Merry Christmas to you, too. And yes, I thought of that earlier. I was hoping this Christmas would somehow be like that one, but I've managed to spoil it for Jane. If I wasn't a man, I think I'd cry.” This last was said so quietly, Bebe had to strain to hear the words.

“Then you must fix whatever is wrong before it's too late. Things left unsaid can do irreparable harm, Daniel. I don't know Jane all that well, but I believe she is a fine person. Do what you have to do, and if that isn't enough, do more. That's my free Christmas advice.”

She turned to Daniel's daughter. “Merry Christmas, Nellie. You look lovely, rather like the spirit of Christmas in that sparkling gown.”

From Nellie she moved on to Philippe. Thank God she'd already observed him from across the room. The shock she'd felt at seeing him in formal attire, looking so much like Reuben, had been considerable. How handsome he was, how arrogantly sure of himself. “Merry Christmas, Philippe,” she said formally. “Tell me, why are all of you sitting here alone? Christmas parties are for fun and camaraderie.”

Nellie shrugged. “I don't know any of these people. They're mostly just technicians. Philippe and Daddy don't know them, either. I thought…we all thought…the party was for the studio stars.”

Bebe's eyes narrowed, and her voice was cool when she responded. “You really should circulate and get to know these people. The studio isn't made up just of stars, you know. The people in this room make Fairmont what it is. I for one am glad Jane gives this party every year. If just a quarter of them walked away from the studio, it couldn't function. I'm sorry if I sound…bossy, but, Daniel, you should know better. Reuben would throw a fit if he knew what your attitude was—and yours, too, Philippe. What right do any of you have to sit here and pretend you're better than they are?”

Daniel was on his feet in a moment. “Hold on, Bebe, it's not like that at all. You have us all wrong. Apparently, you're—”

“No, Daniel,
you
have it all wrong,” Bebe interrupted. “I can comment only on what I see. And what I see are three Fairmont Studios employees deliberately isolating themselves from the other guests at a lovely party, remaining exclusive…as if they thought they were too good to mingle with ordinary people. And that upsets me. Have a nice holiday,” she said, and walked away.

“I think we've just been put in our places,” Daniel said quietly. “And she's absolutely right.” He sat down, his eyes searching the crowded room for a sign of the brilliant red dress. Jane was angry with him and he didn't blame her. He hadn't stopped to think how his sitting apart would appear to the guests. Now, three-quarters of the way into the party, it didn't seem a good idea to get up and mingle. Damn it to hell! He wasn't doing anything right. This was his and Jane's first Christmas together, and he'd wanted it to be perfect. His hand reached into the pocket of his jacket to touch the small velvet box that rested inside. It was the ring he'd picked up earlier in the day—a flawless solitaire that would look beautiful on Jane's finger. Engaged…He wanted it more than anything in the world. The present he'd laid on the table, a diamond bracelet, hadn't even aroused Jane's curiosity. All evening long he'd waited patiently, hoping she would make her way across the room to say something, to acknowledge the gift. But she hadn't.

“Well, if you want
my
opinion, I think Aunt Bebe is wrong,” Nellie said petulantly. “I don't know any of these people, and they don't know me. What can I possibly have in common with them? I think this is a stuffy, boring party, and I want to leave. Are you coming, Philippe?”

Philippe did not respond; he was struggling to suppress the anger he felt—at himself and at the situation in general. Twice he'd made a move to get up and talk to some of the men he knew slightly, but each time Nellie had pulled him back as though she'd sensed his intention. His mother was right. Now he felt about two inches tall and wanted nothing more than to run to her and apologize. The disgust he'd seen in her eyes devastated him, and what he was hearing and seeing from Nellie bothered him.

“I think we should just sneak out. No one will even miss us,” Nellie said impishly to Philippe. “Come on, let's go. Are you staying, Daddy?”

Reluctantly, Daniel shook his head. There didn't seem to be much point in staying now.

“Well, Philippe?” Nellie prodded.

“If you're sure you want to leave, it's okay with me,” Philippe said, rising. “But shouldn't we say good night to our hostess?”

“To Jane!” Nellie trilled. “Hardly. Let's go before she takes it into her head to introduce me to some other eligible bachelor.” That was all Philippe had to hear. Taking her hand, he hurried her to the front door, grabbed her coat from the hall closet, and ushered her outside.

In the cool night air Nellie pressed closer to Philippe and kissed him. “I've been wanting to do that all night,” she murmured. “That's why I wanted to leave. I want to be with
you
on Christmas Eve, Philippe, not a room full of strangers. Sitting with my father all night isn't my idea of a good time, either.” She kissed him again, more ardently this time, her leg insinuating itself between his. “Let's go to your house,” she whispered.

Philippe practically tripped over his own feet as he walked with her to the car. “Are you sure, Nellie? Your father…”

“Philippe, are you trying to talk your way out of making love to me?” Nellie demanded.

“No, of course not. It's just that…your father…I've asked you before, and you…”

“That was then. This is now. I was frightened…. This will be my first time, and I…I wanted it to be just right. Christmas sort of makes it right. I feel it's right.” She squeezed his hand. “Don't you?”

“Hell, yes.” Aching with anticipation, he climbed behind the wheel. At last he was going to make love to sweet, wonderful Nellie, the girl he wanted to marry. His first Christmas present. Jesus, how lucky could a guy get.

“Don't worry about Daddy, Philippe,” Nellie said, snuggling close to him. “No matter what he said, I know he'll stay until the wee hours and get home in time for breakfast like he usually does. Then he'll probably spend all day with Jane. Or maybe he won't go home at all this time. Let's not think about Daddy, let's think about what you and I are going to do…to each other.” Philippe almost swerved off the road when Nellie's hand loosened his belt buckle.

Neither Nellie nor Philippe noticed Daniel standing in the doorway as they drove off. Nellie was wrong; Daniel was going home to the empty house in the canyon, the engagement ring still in his pocket.

 

It was close to midnight when the last guest left Jane's house.

“Now, that was a hell of a party,” Bebe said, laughing. “No drugs, not too much alcohol, good music, nice people, and excellent food. I want you to know that this is my first party since…turning over a new leaf, as they say. I'm so glad you asked me. Look, if we work together to clean up this place now, you won't wake up to a mess. It won't take long.”

“That's not necessary, Bebe,” Jane said, slipping off her heels with a sigh of relief. “Aside from having breakfast with you, I don't have…what I mean is, I don't have any plans at all for tomorrow.”

“Is that another way of saying you and Daniel had a tiff?” Bebe said, stacking a load of dishes onto a tray.

“I think it's more than a tiff. Listen, why don't you leave that for now and sit down. I need to talk. We can do it later if you still want to help.”

Bebe nodded and sank onto the sofa while Jane took a seat next to her and began to talk. The words tumbled out between tears and sobs, all the things she'd been feeling, suspecting, for months now. “I know Daniel planned on giving me an engagement ring this evening,” she said at one point. “When I saw Nellie at the door with him, something in me snapped. I showed my anger and I acted on that anger. You saw him leave. I wanted to ask him to stay, I really did, but I couldn't.” She hesitated, then rushed on. “I'm resigning, Bebe, the day after New Year's. I just can't stay on with the situation the way it is. I'm sorry.”

“Jane, you can't resign,” Bebe said, clearly shocked and disturbed by Jane's announcement. “Reuben will never forgive you, and he'll never forgive me for allowing it. You can't let this girl force you out. I wish you'd said something sooner. The way I see it, we have two choices. We can transfer her out of production and into publicity or wardrobe, anywhere we want, or we can simply fire her. Look, I'll tell Daniel. I'm not bashful when it comes to something like this.”

Jane shook her head. “I appreciate it, Bebe, but it won't work. You're forgetting Philippe. Philippe and Nellie aligned together will be deadly to the studio. I don't want to do anything that will cause Daniel heartache. I love him too much. Can't you see, I have to leave.”

“But that isn't going to work, either. Nellie will always stand between you and Daniel. You have to tell him how you feel. He…you can't build a relationship without truth and honesty. Take a good long look at me, Jane, for I am the living proof of what I say. I wouldn't wish that kind of thing on my worst enemy. Why don't we just think about this during the coming week. No hard-rock decisions need to be made this evening. Tomorrow I want you to call Daniel and spend Christmas with him. You don't have to accept his ring if you don't want to. Do it for yourself, Jane, it's what you want. Now, show me those mysterious packages you mentioned.”

“Yes, in a minute.” Jane stood, licking at her dry lips uncertainly. “I think…no, I
know
I'm doing the right thing by showing you what's in my safe. If you weren't the strong woman I know you are, I would keep these papers to myself. I've done little else but think of this for weeks now. I think you can handle this. If I'm wrong…”

Bebe could feel her pulse start to pound. Jane sounded so ominous. Whatever the packages contained must have something to do with Reuben. Summoning a smile to her lips, she said, “Why don't you just get these…packages, and we'll take it from there.” Her face remained expressionless when Jane returned a few moments later and handed her four battered brown envelopes.

While Jane cleared the room and washed the dishes and glassware, Bebe read. She was still engrossed as Jane moved the furniture back to its original position, vacuumed the rug, and straightened the remaining presents under the tree. Every now and then Jane glanced at her as she read Reuben's heart-wrenching words. Had she come to the part where Reuben said he loved her, she wondered. It was almost dawn when Bebe laid aside the last piece of paper, her eyes sad and moist.

“I think, Jane, that this is one of those miraculous gifts Gentiles talk about at Christmastime,” she said quietly. “Thank you for sharing this with me. You were right to wonder if I was ready for something like this. Months ago I wouldn't have been able to handle it, but I can now.” She gazed at the Christmas tree and smiled. “I wonder where he is and what he's doing at this moment. Christmas…I was standing by your tree earlier, and he came into my thoughts. He's always in my thoughts. I know I will love Reuben all my life and into eternity. I don't know why. He's never given me a reason to love him, but I do.”