Sins of the Father (4 page)

“Is this your not-so-subtle way of telling
me that you’ve got a new hobby now that you’re well and truly
retired?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking
about.”

“Helen, I don’t need you to mediate between
my parents and me.”

“Then consider it a case study. Maybe I’ll
go back to school and get another doctorate.”

He grinned. “In what this time?”

“I don’t know.”

“You’ve already got one in psychology. This
alleged case study of yours sounds awfully psychological,” he said.
“I understand why you’re curious about Mom, but haven’t you been
traumatized enough for one lifetime? Why would you want to put
yourself through that, Helen?”

“I don’t want to believe that your parents
are a lost cause. If there’s a possibility that your mother feels
differently than Aidan does, shouldn’t she have the opportunity to
have a relationship with you if that’s what
she
wants?”

“You’re assuming that you could get her away
from Dad for two minutes.”

“If I can, will you let me meet her?”

This time, it was Crevan who kicked the
swing into motion. “Depends. What’ve you got in mind?”

“Lunch. You, me, your mother. Some nice
little place out on Hennessey Island maybe.”

“I don’t know, Helen. I’d hate for you to
get sucked into my personal drama.”

“Do I at least get to spend some time
getting to know Alex?”

Crevan’s smile turned curious. “Where’s all
of this coming from, Helen? You’ve been here almost a year. You’ve
never taken such an interest in my personal life before.”

I reached for the hand on my shoulder and
squeezed it. “I thought I would die trying to escape what happened
to me, Crevan. I guess it woke me up a little bit.”

“Meaning what exactly?”

My shoulder lifted slightly. “There are a
lot of people here who have been very good to me. Offered me
friendship even though as you and Johnny put it, I can be a little
erratic at times. I feel disconnected. Is it wrong that I want to
make things right? Is it so unbelievable that I want a normal life
full of friends who know how very important they are to me?”

“Of course it’s not wrong. I don’t think we
see you quite the way you see yourself though. It’s been a rough
year for you, even before you came to Darkwater Bay. Do you know
what I see when I look at you?”

I shook my head.

“Strength.”

“C’mon… you’ve watched me fall apart on more
than one occasion, Crevan.”

“I’ve watched you retreat and summon that
unstoppable force inside you. I’ve seen you run away from things
you didn’t want to deal with right that second. But through all of
that, you’ve always found a strength that I’ve envied.”

“Why?”

Crevan stared at the cliff and the ocean
beyond. “It’s hard not to envy a woman who’s more alpha male than
any man I’ve ever known.”

“Even Johnny?”

He chuckled. “Especially Johnny. You’ve had
him wrapped around your little finger from the day he first met
you. He’d never tell you no, not to any crazy request you had.”

“But he has in the past.”

“Uh-huh,” Crevan grinned. “And how long did
he win those battles?”

“I gained weight. I’m about to gain a whole
lot of it thanks to him.” Of course, I referred to the time at
Christmas when Johnny camped out in my home and got awfully high
handed, insisting that I stop eating narcotics and substitute food
instead.

Crevan’s eyes scanned my face. “You’re so
much stronger than I am. You’ve got your mind set on this thing
with my mother, don’t you? Even if I offered to bring Alex over for
you to grill, you’re not letting go of the other thing. I should do
the wise thing and pick my battles.”

“So you’ll let me meet your mom?”

He sighed and shrugged. “Don’t get your
hopes up. I only know one force more unstoppable than you are,
Helen. His name is Aidan Conall.”

“We’ll see about that.” Then again, maybe
some things really are genetic.

Chapter 4

I strolled into the bedroom in a bathrobe
with a towel wrapped around damp hair when Johnny woke up the next
morning. He rubbed his eyes and blinked at me. “You’re up
already?”

“Things to do today.”

A sort of wary curiosity descended. “And
what sort of things would those be?”

“Maya and I are going shopping this morning.
It’s her day off. Then I’m meeting Briscoe for lunch. I’m surprised
he didn’t tell you yesterday. The man doesn’t know how to keep a
secret.”

His eyes narrowed. “What’re you up to,
Helen?”

“Shopping. Furniture today.”

“Oh?”

I nodded. “Plus, Maya has decided that she’s
going to convince me that her gynecologist is the person I should
see for this prenatal stuff. Don’t look so panicked. She’s an
obstetrician too. I’ve got to see somebody that’s capable of
actually delivering this baby, Johnny. You didn’t think I’d
continue to see Dr. Schwartz for the duration of the pregnancy, did
you?”

“I guess I hadn’t really thought that far
ahead. What sort of furniture are you buying today?”

I grinned and perched on the edge of the
bed. “Nursery furniture. Do you object?”

“No, but I sort of figured that might be
something we’d do together. Is my taste in home decor so terrible
that I’m not allowed to help pick out baby furniture?”

“I can see it now. Minimalist baby.”

Johnny chuckled. “Fine. So I don’t go for
all the little touches women like to put in every square foot of a
home.”

“Are you saying you think my house is
cluttered?”

“I’d love living in your space if it were a
cardboard box under a bridge, sweetheart.”

I leaned over and kissed him softly. “Good
answer, Mr. Orion.”

“What I’m not sure I like is the idea of you
running around town without me tagging along.”

“I can’t hole up here forever. It’s not like
I’ll be alone either.”

“Yeah, I trusted someone else to keep you
safe before. Look how that turned out.”

Gillette’s words rippled through my brain
like a stone skipping over water. Was it safe for me to go anywhere
alone? Had my freedom been sold long before I was abducted?

“Hey,” Johnny said softly. “I shouldn’t have
said that. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want to be a prisoner in my own
home either. It would be really easy to stay here and never leave
again.”

“You’re not a prisoner. Seems like we’ve
both got a bit of adjusting to do.”

“I agree. I think it’s time you went back to
work at the office, Johnny. If we have to be in constant
communication in the meantime, until we both feel a little more
secure, we’ll do it. But you have responsibilities. I know you’re
still working on this thing with Senator Sanderfield’s campaign
contributions. Zack needs to have easy access to you while he
prepares to try Melissa Sherman for her role in what happened to me
and God only knows how many other innocent victims. I’m not your
only responsibility.”

“You’re the only one that matters,” he said
softly. “Helen, what if I’m not ready to go back? What if being
away from you for even five minutes is too long? I won’t be any use
to anyone, not Joe or Zack or OSI.”

“I was in the shower for 20 minutes. You did
just fine.”

“I didn’t know you were gone,” he said.
“What if something had happened because you sneaked off while I was
sleeping?”

“Right,” I shook my head slowly. “I might’ve
been sucked down the shower drain. Johnny, I know your concerns
weren’t unfounded, but we can’t keep doing this. At some point,
you’ve got to trust me to be alone. I’m not distracted anymore. If
anything, I’m still pretty damned paranoid.”

“I’ll probably call you a million times and
get less done today than I would if we just stayed home,” he
grumbled. “But you’ve made your point.”

If I were a wise woman, I’d grab the
identity Johnny offered me. I’d be content to be his wife, and a
mother. I’d leave the nagging questions Andy Gillette left me with
unanswered. I don’t think I’ve ever aspired to wisdom. I know I’ve
never claimed that particular virtue.

“Johnny, the real point is that I’ll come
home, we’ll have a quiet dinner together. You can start putting
baby furniture into the nursery.”

“Have we decided which room we’re
using?”

“I’m not putting our baby upstairs,” I said.
“I thought we’d use the guest room down here. Of course, that’s too
far away too, so for the time being, I thought maybe you could move
my gym equipment to that guest room and we’d put the baby over
there.” I pointed to the wall that separated the exercise room from
the master bedroom.

“You want our baby’s nursery to be
accessible through the bathroom?” Johnny shook his head and
laughed. “Honey, why don’t we have a room built onto this one? It
wouldn’t have to be very large.”

“I’ve got ten million rooms already.”

“Then let’s use this little sitting area
over here,” Johnny pointed to the space that would be more than
adequate if the furniture was removed.

“I should make some measurements before I
leave. You’re right. That space would be perfect.”

“Hey,” Johnny gripped my wrist. “Promise
that you’ll call me. A lot?”

“I’ll call so often that you’ll start
feeling like you’re shopping with us.”

“Which isn’t such a bad idea, Helen. I could
clear my schedule today and tag along.”

“Would that be to make you feel more secure
or me?”

“A little bit of both, I guess,” he said.
Johnny’s eyes fluttered shut. “I know you’re right. It’s hard to
let go and cope with the worry.”

“It won’t be easy for me either. We have to
do this, Johnny. You wanted me to face what happened to me, to move
past it. Now you have to let me do it.”

“Wish it didn’t have to be today.”

“We could make a compromise,” I suggested.
“When I finish at lunch with Tony, you could meet me here at home
and we could spend all afternoon together.”

“This is gonna be the longest morning ever.
Call me when you’re done with lunch. I’ll be here when you get
home.”

I was nervous, leaving the house without
Johnny. My eyes darted frequently to the rearview mirror – just to
be sure that no one was following me. Gillette’s threat loomed
large in my mind. Already owned, whether I new it or not. It was
only a matter of time.

They tried to abduct Sofia Datello again
too. Would someone come after me again? It sparked a sense of
urgency in my heart, to get the person behind what happened to me
and make him pay. If Johnny knew that I feared another abduction,
he wouldn’t have let me out of his sight for a second. It would
seriously hamper the vengeance that simmered inside me.

There would be justice, but it wouldn’t come
from the court. There would be an end to the threat, but the police
wouldn’t be the ones to protect me and facilitate an arrest. I
didn’t fight the instinct within me. I would never fight it
again.

I am my father’s child. Wendell’s child.
Biology means nothing. He’s my father.

But learning the truth about my first
moments on earth was the best way I could think of to find out who
continued to pull strings in my life. If that meant that I had to
learn that my gene pool came from Aidan and Kathleen Conall instead
of Wendell and Marie Eriksson, that’s what I would do.

Maya met me in front of the same furniture
store where I had purchased most of what was in my house in Beach
Cliffs now. She held two cups of coffee in her hands.

“It’s decaf,” she thrust one forward. “Can’t
have you overloading on caffeine in your condition.”

I laughed. “I’m assuming that the content
would meet Johnny’s exacting standards for my calorie
consumption.”

“Loaded with fat and sugar. I’m surprised he
didn’t talk you into letting him tag along, Helen. Aside from the
fact that I’ve never seen anybody so frantic as he was after it
happened, he seems like he’s going to be the ultimate hands on
partner during this pregnancy.”

“And beyond,” I grinned. “He hasn’t said a
whole lot about it yet, but I know he’s dying to jump in and be a
dad. Super Dad.”

“He loves you, my friend.”

I nodded soberly. “Yeah, I know he does.” It
was knowledge that would make decisions difficult for me. “He had a
hard time letting me leave the house this morning.” We sat on a
large planter outside the store while the last filaments of morning
fog burned off in the bright sunshine.

“How are you handling this, Helen? I mean
really handling it, not just what you know everyone wants to
hear.”

I shrugged. “I have good days and bad days,
I suppose. It gets a little easier every day. At first I wasn’t
sure any of this was real. I thought maybe I’d lost my mind and was
only imagining that Johnny found me.”

“He warned all of us not to talk about what
happened out there, Helen, but there’s something I think you should
know.”

“Tell me.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to be
responsible for a setback.”

“I’m positive.”

She nodded slowly. “All right. They had
Gillette’s body shipped back here, since that’s where the crime
took place and the investigation belonged to OSI.”

“You did the autopsy?”

“Yes,” she said. “Honey, when you put your
mind to killing someone, you really get the job done.”

“I broke his neck.”

“His neck, severed his spinal cord, crushed
his larynx, you name it. Johnny said they had your ankles in irons.
Yet I didn’t find a single ligature mark on his throat.”

“He’d been dead for a few days, Maya. I’d
imagine it compromised some of the physical findings you might’ve
otherwise observed.”

“You’d think, wouldn’t you? I found your
skin under his fingernails and your footprints – at least from the
balls of your feet – on his chest.”