Sinful Purity (Sinful Series) (20 page)

“Look, Liz, Zack just doesn’t want to be shot down. That’s all. He’s kinda shy like that, I guess.”

“Zack, shy? I can’t believe that.”

“Liz, I told you, there’s more to that boy than his image. Give him a chance.”

“I’ll think about it,” I promised.

“Really, we’re back to that?” Caleb said, aggravated by the lack of progress.

“Caleb, look at it this way. You’ve given me more to think about.”

Caleb smiled at me as our anatomy class started. Lucy had some appointment, so she would be missing the bizarre and disgusting nuances of a fetal pig’s reproduction system. Lucky her. After class Caleb walked me to western civilizations. He had never walked me to my last class before. It struck me as odd. Until I saw Zack walk out of the classroom doorway. That’s right, I had class with Zack. I was sure the two of them needed to have a powwow about my decision. You know, the one I hadn’t made. Boy, was this going to be good. I squeezed between the two of them to get through the door.

“Hi, Liz,” Zack greeted.

Again, out of character for him. Was nothing today going to proceed as normal? Was today the day to just break all the rules? Caleb and Zack stood outside talking for a couple of minutes until Professor Jacarse walked in and started his daily tormenting roll call. As if on cue, Zack walked in and took a seat next to me. Yep, today no precedents would be followed.

Professor Jacarse droned on and on for the whole ninety minutes while Zack and I just sat quietly in the closest proximity we’d ever been to each other. Even when we were in his truck together, I had been sure to sit as far away as I could get on his gray bench seat. Today, the way the seats were linked together, we were almost bumping elbows. I tried to tuck my arm in as much as possible, but the more closed off I became, the more room Zack’s arm sought out. Near the end of class it was practically impossible for me to continue taking notes. I glanced over and noticed that Zack had never taken any notes at all. He was just staring at me. I smiled nervously and looked down. When I brought my head back up, I saw his friends at the front of the class trying to break their necks to see whom Zack had chosen to abandon them for. I could see from the looks on their faces that they did not approve.

Zack caught my look of humiliation and regret when I saw his friends judging me. He then did the sweetest thing I never imagined him doing. He grabbed my hand from on top the desk and wrapped his fingers between mine, grasping my hand tightly in his. Then, as if holding my hand wasn’t enough, he shot his friends a look that surely could have killed them. Zack turned to me with a smile and a reassuring wink. I had never seen him
wink. My heart swelled at the thought of how much Zack reminded me of Brett in that instant.

Aw, no!
I thought, feeling all my resolve and distaste for Zack melt away. That was it. I was a goner.

When class ended, I stood up, ready to leave. But Zack stopped me, still holding on to my hand.

“Liz, I’m sorry about that,” he said, looking toward his friends at the front of the class.

“That’s okay,” I replied quietly.

“No, it’s not. I didn’t know they’d act like that.”

“Because you sat with me?”

“Yeah. But if it’s any consolation, I don’t think it’s you.”

“Well, tell you what. Just don’t sit with me and we won’t have to find out,” I said, only half-joking.

“Oh.” Zack’s face fell.

“I was just kidding. I’m just not good with attention. I mean, I don’t really like people looking at me.”

“Yeah, me too,” Zack agreed without any readable expression on his face.

“I find that hard to believe.”

“Liz, there’s a lot about me that might surprise you.”

“I doubt it. But thanks for what you did.” I picked up my books and walked out the door.

“Hey, Liz. Wait,” Zack called as he ran up behind me. I stopped and turned around. “You wanna grab some coffee or something?”

“I don’t drink coffee.”

Before I could explain anything else, Zack interrupted me. “We can go get whatever you want.”

I felt bad. I actually heard hope in his voice. “I can’t. I have to be somewhere.”

“Where? Can I drive you?” Zack asked eagerly.

“It’s gonna sound ridiculous to you,” I said, more than a little embarrassed.

“Try me.”

“I have to go to church,” I admitted, waiting for the mocking.

“Oh, that’s right. You and Caleb go to the same church, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Caleb goes on Sunday. Why are you going on Wednesday night?”

“It’s a long story. It’s just the way it is. I have to go, all right? Sorry, they’re just kinda strict. I don’t want to be late.” I walked off toward the stairs to my room.

“Can I give you a ride?” Zack called after me.

“That’s okay, but thanks,” I replied disappearing up the stairs.

Once at St. Matthew’s, I made it through confession without much incident. Mass went along speedily, mostly due to the fact that I was concentrating more on Zack than on prayer.
I probably should confess that next week.

Father Brennigan’s homily was almost over by the time that now-familiar dizzy, hazy feeling swept over me. As I stood to leave, I fell over and accidentally bumped into Sister Christine.

“Mary Elizabeth?” I heard Sister Christine calling but she seemed far away, down a tunnel. “Mary Elizabeth?” she called again.

I felt a quick stinging on my face. I opened my eyes slowly, fighting the weight of my eyelids, just in time to see Mother Superior’s hand slapping me in the face again. My eyes closed, only to fly open a moment later from the stinging sensation radiating from my cheek.

What did I do to deserve this?
Never in all my years at the orphanage had Mother ever struck me.

“I’m sorry,” I stammered, my voice weak.

“I think she’s coming to,” I heard another voice say.

I opened my eyes fully to see a sea of faces swirling above me. I felt like Alice in Wonderland. Everything was all topsy-turvy. As I focused more clearly, I could see the ceiling of St. Matthew Cathedral above me.

This is an odd position.

“Don’t get up!” I heard another voice order. This time I recognized it as Sister Pietra.

“I’m okay,” I muttered, struggling to sit up.

“Slowly, child,” Sister Christine warned, helping me to my feet.

My eyesight became clearer, more focused. “I’m sorry, Mother. I think I bumped into you.”

Mother Superior smiled widely and let out a laugh the likes of which I had never heard in all the time I’d known her. I couldn’t understand if what I had said was really funny or if she was just relieved that I wasn’t still lying on the church floor.

“It’s all right, child,” Sister Christine assured. She and Sister Pietra helped me back to the orphanage. The other sisters took the children upstairs to get ready for bed. In all the commotion I saw so many faces, but not once did I remember seeing Father Brennigan. It struck me as odd, but I chalked it up to my throbbing head and murky memories.

“Are you all right now, my dear?” Mother asked, leaning over me where I sat on the small entry bench.

“Yes, Mother. I’m okay. I just have a bit of a headache. May I go now?”

“You must wait for your ride, dear,” Mother ordered softly, more fitting of her title than ever before.

“My ride?” I asked, puzzled.

“Yes, child. I phoned Caleb Price for you. He’s on his way. I told him you fainted during church. He seemed very concerned. He’s a nice boy.”

“You called Caleb?” I felt even more lost than usual. Had Mother Superior just called the pierced, blue-haired boy nice?

“He is your friend, isn’t he?” Mother Superior asked cautiously.

“Yes, Mother. I just didn’t think you’d call him. That’s all.” I tried to mask my amazement.

“His family are well-respected members of St. Matthew’s, Mary Elizabeth.” Mother sounded sterner now.

“Yes, I know. I was just surprised.”

“I have the utmost confidence that Caleb Price will get you home safely. He should be here any moment. Just rest for now.”

I closed my eyes as I lay back on the small entry bench. I didn’t open them again until Caleb nudged me.

“Liz, we’re here. Do you have the keys to your room?”

“What?” I asked groggily.

“Your keys, Liz. We need your keys.”

I opened my eyes to see Caleb rifling through my purse as two large security guards propped me up.

“Never mind, I found them,” Caleb announced.

Caleb opened the door and turned to the guards. “I’ve got it from here. Thank you.”

“Caleb?” I inquired, pleading for understanding.

“Liz, it’s okay, you’re home. You’re safe now.” Caleb helped me over to the bed and sat me down.

“What happened?” I asked.

“I don’t really know. Mother Superior called and said that you had passed out in church and that I needed to come and get you. She said something about how I would understand the severity of the situation. I had no idea what she was talking about. But I never really understood ‘nunspeak’ anyway. So I came and got you.”

“I’m sorry, Caleb. You didn’t have to do that.”

“I didn’t mind, Liz, honest. It wasn’t like I was going to leave you there to be incarcerated again. We just got you out among the living.”

I laughed. “You sound like Kelly.”

“And you sound drunk. Are you sure you just fainted, or did you get into a little too much of Father Brennigan’s Communion wine?”

“Really, Caleb. I have no idea what happened. One minute I was listening to Father’s homily and the next I was bumping into Mother Superior. Oh, wait—Zack.”

“What?” Caleb asked, intrigued.

“I wasn’t listening to Father. I was thinking about Zack.” I let out a giggle and closed my eyes.

“Well, good thing you’re not going to remember this in the morning, Liz.”

The next thing I knew, it was incredibly bright in my room. I woke up with a pounding headache and my lips were sore and puffy.

That’s odd
.

I looked around the room, trying to piece together the night before. I was still wearing my same clothes.
That’s good.

I vaguely remembered Caleb. Then the images started rushing back to me. My stomach felt queasy. I lay there, afraid I’d throw up if I moved any more. I glanced over at my alarm. It was one thirty in the afternoon. I had slept through all my morning classes. If I hurried I could make the last bit of anatomy and all of western civilizations, but my throbbing head and spinning stomach had something else in mind. So I curled back up in bed and went back to sleep. I woke again at four and decided that I needed to shower and get dressed. I was afraid to miss a day of work at the orphanage. I still wasn’t exactly sure what had happened last night, but I certainly didn’t want to make anything worse by not showing up.

It was six thirty by the time I arrived at MIQ. I was more than a couple of hours late. When I arrived, the children had already had dinner. I went to the kitchen to see if there were any leftovers I could pick at. I hadn’t eaten
all day and my stomach was more than a little complainy about the whole thing. After my snack I began washing the dinner dishes. Sister Laverne walked in—curious, I’m sure, about the clanking and banging.

“Well, Mary Elizabeth. We didn’t think we’d be seeing you today. Not with you not feeling well and all.”

“I didn’t want to miss work, Sister.”

“That’s very admirable, dear. Honestly, though, you look terrible. Why don’t you find Mother and then head home.”

“Yes, Sister.” That sounded like a marvelous idea. I did still feel absolutely awful.

I walked up the stairs to Sister Christine’s office. As I turned the corner, I could hear arguing coming from behind the door.

“I have every right, according to the word of God,” a deep and angry voice bellowed.

“You know that is different. You’re not guiding, not leading. You’re changing personalities!” a female voice cried. It sounded like Sister Christine. Or maybe I just assumed it was Sister Christine because it was coming from her office.

“You weren’t so concerned when my actions were making your orphanage famous and you wealthy,” the male voice said.

“You know it was never about the money,” the lady’s voice pleaded. “There have been too many incidents, too much suspicion. Someone is going to uncover the truth.”

“We will never be discovered.” The male voice was angry at the insult.

“I had a girl almost die, another in and out of the infirmary, and the boy—”

“I have made adjustments. There is no need to worry, Sister.” The male voice seemed calmer.

Did he just say Sister? Is Sister Christine behind something sinister?

“And what about her?” Sister asked.

“What do you care about her? She’s mine, not yours,” the male voice spewed with venom.

“You must let her go. She’s drawing too much attention. I’ve let your obsession go on long enough!”

“This matter is closed!” the man screamed back. Then his voice turned sickeningly sweet and condescending. “I’ll take your concerns into consideration, Sister.” The arguing stopped. I panicked. I knew that one of the
two angry participants would be opening that door any second to find me standing there frozen in disbelief. A scandal at Mary Immaculate Queen. Had the reporters been right all along? I quickly pulled my head together and quietly ran down the stairs and out the front doors. I never had a chance to tell Sister Christine I was leaving. But I was sure Sister Laverne would tell her that I wasn’t feeling well and that she’d sent me home. Maybe that would be enough. But what if Mother knew I would always ask her permission first? What if she assumed I had overheard her argument with the strange, angry man? What would she do? Well, it was too late now. I couldn’t go back; she’d already know that I’d left. It would look even more suspicious to return. I would just have to play it off. I was really sick and had to go home immediately. That’s what I would tell her if she ever asked.

By the time I got back to my dorm, I was frozen and exhausted. I had run practically the whole way home. I was terrified. I couldn’t get the villainous voices out of my head. My nerves were all on edge. I couldn’t sit still. I didn’t know what to do. Then there was a knock on my door. My mind raced.
Oh my God. They know.
Someone spoke.