Simply Heaven (37 page)

It had never even occurred to her to confront him, to tell him what a lowlife scoundrel he was and how she loathed him and would hate him till he died. To do so would be to bare her soul, to let him know how much she loved him. She did not want to do that for the sake of her pride, which, sadly, was all she had left to salvage out of the ruins of her life. So she would ride away and be long gone before morning. If he did try to follow her, he would never find her. She would use every shred of Indian cunning she possessed to ensure she left no trail, no trace.

He and everyone else would think she just was not happy in her new life and had returned to her own world. He would marry Selena and give their baby a name and a home and sooner or later forget all about her. Bitterly she wondered if he ever thought of her anyway, unless she was naked in his arms and giving him his pleasure.

But she had received pleasure too, she was pained to remind herself. Her memories were nothing but warm and grand and would be with her for a long time to come, maybe forever.

She looked around her at the room she had come to love with its lace tepee over the bed and could not help smiling to remember that first night in Mobile when she had not known what a canopy was. Oh, there were such good times to think about as she had learned the ways of her father's world.

And there was also her father to remember. Despite the agony of how Steve had used her, crushed her, she would forever be grateful for having had the time to get to know and love her father. That was something even the pain and humiliation could never overshadow.

Yes, Raven promised herself, she would have many glorious things to remember, for she had also come to love Halcyon and all its people. It was a shame that she was leaving just as it appeared she and Lisbeth would, at last, be close.

She was also saddened to think that the slaves would not be freed by her hand and their cabins would not be repaired and made nicer. But that could not be helped, for as much as she wished it, Raven knew it was impossible for her to stay now that Steve had made her the ultimate fool.

Lisbeth disappeared inside the stables. She looked so happy. Raven hoped she would eventually find someone else to teach her how to ride and shoot. Perhaps she would, now that she had come to a new awareness of herself. And maybe some of it would affect Julius as well. They could turn their whole lives around.

Raven left the window, knowing she was only torturing herself to think of what might have been, and willed the hours to pass quickly so she could be on her way.

* * *

Masson Leroux leaned against the trunk of a great live oak tree. Lacy shawls of Spanish moss concealed him as he stood watching the house... watching Raven as she moved back and forth in front of her window.

He knew he might have to stay there all night. And maybe the next one and the one after that. But he would do it if that was what it took to catch her by herself after dark. She went for rides sometimes. He knew that. He'd seen her when he was out hunting. But now he was hunting for
her.
And he would be right behind her when she did go out—with his rifle loaded and ready.

Chapter 26

Steve lay on his back and stared up at the ceiling of his room. It was hours till midnight, and he was miserable from wanting to be with Raven now. More and more, it irked him that they had to be so secretive. He could understand not letting anyone know they were sleeping together, but he saw no harm in spending time together in other ways: riding, picnicking, anything to enjoy each other's company. Otherwise, how could he make Raven see they might have a future together?

He bolted upright at the thought, then laughed out loud and shook himself as though he had just awakened from a long, long sleep—months of sleep, in fact.

He had just acknowledged what he had known all along but been afraid to admit—he
did
want a future with Raven. More than that, he wanted a future with her as his
wife.

He loved her, by God.

And he was sick and tired of waiting in his room every night for her to sneak up the ladder as if she were ashamed, as if
he
were ashamed, because he wasn't.

These days she stole into his thoughts constantly. Memories of their time together on the trail flooded him with a sweet warmth, but everything about Raven was a joy to behold. Maybe he had promised himself never to fall in love, never marry and settle down with one woman. But that was before Raven. She had changed all that, had changed him. God, it was a wonderful feeling! He just couldn't wait to tell her, couldn't wait to find out if she might feel the same way about him.

He reached for his shirt and dragged his boots over, smiling to think how surprised she was going to be when Mariah told her she had a caller and then came downstairs to find out it was him, waiting to tell her he was there to state his intentions to court her proper. He could just see the look on her face.

He hesitated as he pulled on a boot.

What if he was making a fool of himself?

After all, Raven had never given any sign that she cared for him beyond the raging passion that always left both of them spent with wonder. But neither had he ever given her reason to think she meant anything more to him.

So all he could do was go to her and pour out his heart, and if it turned out she didn't give a damn about him except for what they shared in bed, so be it. He had to know.

Because if she didn't, he felt a pang of despair to acknowledge, it was probably best that he start giving some thought to moving on, for a future of stolen passion was not what he wanted out of life.

* * *

Masson cursed softly as a tree limb slapped him in the face.

Despite a waxing moon, there were a lot of clouds in the sky, and it was hard to see where he was going as he tried to follow after Raven. Why was she riding parallel to the main road, instead of on it? She plowed the mustang right into the brambles and weeds.

He also wondered why she was wearing an army uniform. He wouldn't have even known it was her if he hadn't seen her come out of the house, creeping along like she didn't want anybody to see her.

He wished he hadn't had so much to drink. It was hard to think clearly with the buzzing in his head, but he had to try. It made no difference where she was going or why. Neither did it matter how she was dressed. This was a fine chance to get rid of her once and for all, and he was going to take it—even if he did feel like the world was spinning all around him.

And he had to try and keep after her, because he wanted to make sure they were a long way from the house before he killed her. It was still early evening, and already two wagons and a carriage had come along. Each time, though he could barely make Raven out in the distance, he saw her rein to a stop and get real still, so she wouldn't be noticed.

He lifted his canteen of whiskey to his mouth and drank, trying to figure what to do. If he kept plodding along behind, sooner or later she might spot him and that wouldn't do; she'd know he was up to something. He just wondered where the hell she was going, sneaking like she was. If she kept on, she'd wind up in Mobile—

He nearly choked on the whiskey he was swallowing. That was it: She was going to Mobile.

About half an hour's ride north, the Alabama River ran into the Mobile River, and she was going to have to cross the plank bridge. By the time she got there it would be late enough that nobody would be around, and he could waylay her if he got ahead of her. To do that, he had only to ride out on the road like he was going somewhere himself. Just keep on going, pretend he didn't know she was anywhere around, and it would be an easy ambush. He could shoot her as she crossed the bridge, then run out and throw her body into the river. So simple.

He kneed his horse into the road.

Raven slowed. She had heard first the wagons and carriages, but now only a horse and rider approached. She was keeping back, so that no one would see her and tell Steve if he were to try and come after her before morning. She doubted that he would. Probably when she did not appear in his room by half past midnight, he would run to Selena and slake his passion with her instead. "Damn you, Steve Maddox," she whispered through a veil of tears, "and damn me for loving you."

The rider passed by. She recognized Masson Leroux and wondered vaguely where he was going but didn't really care.

After a few moments, she swiped at her eyes and continued on.

* * *

"Joshua, you'd better hurry up those horses," Lisbeth called cheerily from where she sat in the carriage. "We need to get on home. I didn't mean to stay so long at the Tremaynes."

"Well, you did," he grumbled, popping the reins and snapping the buggy whip over the horses' rumps. "I'm surprised you didn't stay for supper."

"They asked me to, but I knew we had to be getting back." She crossed her arms and hugged herself with delight. Everything had gone so well. Barley had been alarmed when he first saw her, no doubt thinking she was making good her threat to tell his parents about the scene between them earlier, but after a few minutes of her lighthearted prattling to his mother, he decided she had come for a different reason, and the second she managed to be alone with him, she told him. She had apologized and begged his forgiveness, and, she blushed to recall, she had come right out and told him she was sweet on him and hoped he would be the one to court her when the time was right. He had smiled and hugged her and they had sneaked a kiss, and now everything was going to be wonderful.

She had even told him what had happened in the woods with the rowdies, and he got so upset she knew he must really care for her. And when she told him about Raven, he was impressed and awed, and even more so when she praised Raven and explained she was now resolved to having peace between them.

Suddenly she sat up to strain to see in the moonlight. "Wasn't that Masson Leroux we just passed?" she asked Joshua.

"Yes'm. Sure looked like him."

"I wonder where he's going. You'd think it being planting season he'd be too tired to be out gadding about."

She closed her eyes, dreaming about the happiness to come, then bolted upright to hear Joshua say, "Well, I'll be. Wonder who that is." And she saw a soldier with long hair riding by on a horse that looked just like Raven's mustang. But it couldn't be. She had no idea who it was and didn't care anyway, because she was anxious to return to her blissful musing.

* * *

"What do you mean, she's not in her room? Where else would she be?"

Mariah wrung her hands. Mister Steve seemed awfully concerned, and she was starting to think maybe she should be too. "I just don't know. I've looked all over the house, and I can't find her. Did you try the stables?"

"I just
came
from the stables," he reminded her irritably, and then apologized, not wanting to take out his frustration on her. "I'm sorry. It's just that I worry about her. She thinks she can take care of herself, but she still doesn't have any business taking off alone like she does sometimes."

"Oh, you don't have to worry about her," Mariah said proudly. "Why, from what Miss Lisbeth told me, there's three river rowdies nursing wounds tonight that can sure tell you that for a fact."

"What did you say?" He had not heard, had not talked to anyone after returning late from the Hulse place, because they had asked him to stay for supper after he had helped them all day. He had come home, taken a bath, and gone straight to his room to wait for Raven. "What are you talking about?"

"Miss Lisbeth got attacked by three rowdies when she was out ridin' today, but Miss Raven, she got there in time to save her, and she shot all three. Didn't kill 'em. Probably could have, but Miss Lisbeth said she thought she just wanted to scare 'em so they could spread the word it's dangerous to come to Halcyon when you ain't got no business here."

"And was Miss Lisbeth angry? You know how mad she got when Raven saved her when her horse ran away. Maybe her feelings are hurt again."

"No, sir, I don't think that could be so." Mariah was glad to give him even more good news. "She and Miss Lisbeth are gonna get along fine from now on. Miss Lisbeth told me so herself."

"What's that? What did Miss Lisbeth tell you?" Lisbeth asked with a smile as she stepped into the foyer and saw them. She walked on in, untying her bonnet. "Hello, Steve." She acknowledged him with a nod.