Simply Being Belle (22 page)

Belle realized her
legs in particular were protesting the exertion.  “I’m not either,” she said,
reaching for the door handle.  She climbed out of the car and found her limbs
were so uncooperative she could barely make them work.      

Dare slid out of
the car and met her on the sidewalk.  He opened his arms to her, and she
stepped into his embrace.  “Thanks for today,” she said.  “I wish we could have
stayed longer.”

“Get back in the
car.  We’ll go now,” he said.

“If only…” she
mused wistfully.

“We could, you
know.”  He pulled back and snared her gaze.  “What’s stopping us?  Come on,
Belle.  What’s stopping us?  I can call work and leave a message for my
assistant to clear my schedule, and you can call Millicent.  You have, what,
four more weeks vacation coming to you.”  He laughed.  “Heck, let’s each pack a
suitcase.”

“We can’t,” she
said sadly, but curiously, she wished they could climb into his car and drive
back to the beach.  She had to admit it had been good to get away, even for a
day. 

“Who says we
can’t?  We’re adults,” he said, smiling encouragingly.  “Come on, Belle. 
Where’s your sense of adventure—your spontaneity.”

She extended a
hand to him, as if greeting him for the first time.  “I’m Belle Preston,” she
said in measured tones.  “Obviously, we haven’t met before.”

He watched her
ruefully.

“I have no sense
of adventure or spontaneity,” she volunteered with a sheepish grin.  “And I
don’t play hookie.”

“Never?”

“Never.”

“Well, I can help
you with adventure and spontaneity,” he volunteered good-naturedly. 

“You can?”

“Absolutely.”  He
arched his brows suggestively, causing her to chuckle.

She cleared her
throat, biting back a smile.  “Anyway … I happen to know that as a new hire at
the firm, you’d be committing professional suicide to take off more than a day
or two at your job,” she pointed out reasonably.  “Your sense of adventure and
spontaneity could cost you your livelihood.”

“You’re right. 
But I’d sure like to go to the beach with you.  Any beach.  I heard Belize is
nice this time of year.”

She searched his
face.  She could read in his eyes how unhappy he was at Preston and Dunne.  Was
he so unhappy he dreaded going to the job each morning?  Had his time at Legal
Aid altered his career aspirations?

Suddenly, the
couple turned toward the house when they heard the dogs barking from the
backyard.  “I should go check on them,” Belle said, but made no move to leave. 
The dogs howled louder, and she finally turned with a resigned sigh.  “They’re
liable to wake the neighbors.”

Dare nodded, but
made no move to leave either.  Finally, he sighed.  “Back to the real world.  I’d
better go, and you’d better tend to those dogs.”

“I’d better,” she
said.

“Unless … need any
help?”

She nodded with a
smile and he followed her up the porch steps and into the house.  She flipped
switches as they went and the home was bathed in light.  As they stepped into
the kitchen, Dare halted her with a warm hand on her shoulder.  He turned her
around and kissed her gently on the lips. 

The dogs had heard
them enter the house, and began howling fiercely from the back porch steps. 
“Doggone dogs,” he muttered against her lips.

She chuckled and
hurried to let them inside.  Surprisingly, they greeted Dare first, encircling
his legs and vying for his affection.  With a crisp command from Belle, they
trotted obediently into their dog houses. 

“Amazing,” he said
with a chuckle as he reached for her and pulled her into his arms.  “Hey, are
you sure you don’t want to run away with me?—head off to parts unknown.”

“We’d have to take
the dogs.  And the cat,” she pointed out.

He sighed.  “Guess
that lets Belize out.”

Suddenly, he
glanced down at the kitten as she swiped at his pant leg.  He bent down to
scoop her up.  “Did you ever name her?” he asked.

She winced.  “No,
I’ve been so busy…”

“Too busy to name
the cat!” he said with mock indignation as he held the kitten in front of his
face.  “Hmmmm,” he mused.  “I know, call her Belize, since she’s part of the
reason we can’t head off to the sandy beaches…”

“Her and any
number of other reasons,” she reminded him with a smile. 

“You’re right
about that,” he said with a beleaguered sigh.

Belle searched his
face.  “You’re really unhappy at Preston and Dunne, aren’t you?”

He gently put the
kitten on the floor and then dropped into a nearby chair at the kitchen table. 
“You know,” he said with a sigh, “I am.  Unhappy that is.  And you know what,
I’m better at giving advice than taking it, because I’d be telling anyone in my
shoes to get out—to find something that makes them happy.  But…”

“It’s not an easy
decision to make,” she said as she took the chair across from him.  She reached
for his hand.  “What are you going to do?”

He smiled and
shook his head.  “Don’t know.  My current job is a great opportunity.  I don’t
want to make a quick decision—don’t want to make a mistake…”

“But…” Belle
murmured softly.

“Indeed—but…”  He
sat quietly for a moment, thinking.  When he spoke, it was with forced
brightness.  “Ah, everything will work out,” he said.  “It always does.”

When she looked
into his eyes, she wondered, would everything work out?  Clearly, he found the
work at the firm unfulfilling.  He could certainly find work elsewhere—but
where?  Would he decide to leave the area? 

The thought of him
leaving broke her heart.  The possibility of her world without him in it left
her feeling bereft and wondering, what did
she
want?   

*** 

If the beach trip
had been a means to relax her, Belle realized it had been a miserable failure—or
at least the expedition up the dune had been.  Besides having caused her aching
muscles and wind whipped skin, the experience had tired her so much she found
herself struggling to rise from bed Monday morning. 

As she readied for
her first day back at Legal Aid, she recalled her and Dare’s conversation on
the dune.  While a part of her acknowledged how right he was about her
propensity toward working too hard—about her need to win—at least she didn’t
have to win at all costs, which she felt accounted for something.  She did realize
he had attempted to help her redefine her definition of winning.  She also
realized, she needed to think more about that, though the very act of thinking
required time she didn’t have. 

She groaned loudly
as she stepped into the shower.  She basked under too-hot water, hoping the
warmth might soothe her tired muscles.  She suspected it would take more than
her usual three cups of coffee to jump-start her tired mind.  Once she had
dressed and readied for her day, she gingerly walked down the stairs to the
kitchen, her muscles protesting with each step she took. 

Why had she been
so determined to be the first to reach the top of that dune—to beat Dare? 
Sure, it was a friendly competition—initially anyway—but why was it so
important to her to win?  Had she not been so determined to best him, she would
certainly be in better shape today. 

Suddenly, she
missed Dare terribly.  She didn’t feel like going to work, but wanted more than
anything to return to her warm bed.  More than that, she wanted Dare’s arms
around her. 

Again, she
wondered, why was she so intent on winning?  And would her work ethic—desire to
win—cost her a relationship with him?

As she sipped her
coffee, she pondered the question.  And then it hit her.  Her work ethic did
have much to do with that stupid Sweet Sixteen tape.  Everything she was today
seemed to have some connection to that awful thing.  She was and had been so
determined to prove herself different from the person on that tape, that she
often worked herself into a frazzle proving to others she was worthy.  Or
perhaps, it was her way of proving it to herself.  Maybe, on some level, it even
allowed her to justify pushing people away—another thought that required more time
to contemplate than she could allot at the moment.

She winced when
she remembered that just before she and Dare had left the beach, he had
implored her to destroy the tape, as if it might somehow erase her need to work
so hard.  As if by destroying it, he might find a way into her life. 

She had told him
she couldn’t destroy the tape yet.  

She thought too
about Dare’s discontentment with his work at Preston and Dunne.  She certainly
understood it.  She had lived it.  She knew that to be successful at the firm,
he would need to give everything of himself to the business.  The job was
all-consuming—in every sense of the word.  Would he manage to make time for her
if he stayed there? 

Suddenly, it hit
her like a brick upside her head.  If she continued along the path she was
going, she wouldn’t have him in her life.  She couldn’t.  There simply wasn’t
time for him, or anyone else for that matter.  She realized she hadn’t even
seen Lacey, Steven, or other friends for some time.  She missed them. 

Even her dogs were
suffering due to her absence from their lives, and the kitten.  She groaned. 
How would she possibly make time for them with the addition of new and even
greater responsibilities?  Work at Legal Aid and work at Elm Place.  She
weighed the two.  What should she do?

She realized, she
couldn’t lose Dare.  He’d said he loved her.  And she knew with certainty that
she loved him, too.  She felt lost, in need of comfort, and her very first
inclination was to turn to him.      

By the time she
arrived at work, she knew exactly what she needed to do.  It wouldn’t be easy,
and it saddened her on some level, but elated her far more. 

Suddenly, the
future felt rife with possibilities. 

***

“Belle, are you
sure?” Millicent asked her for the umpteenth time.  “Truly sure?”

She smiled
serenely as she nodded.  “I am sure.  I’ve loved my time here, more than I can
say, but it’s time to move on.”

“You’ll oversee
your grandfather’s foundation then?” Millicent asked.

She nodded.  “I
think it’s what he would want,” she said, realizing it was true.  Her
grandfather had spoken to her often about his wish to use the charitable
foundation for the betterment of the community, but had also voiced his fears
that the wrong person in charge could be a recipe for disaster.  Thankfully,
there had been no incidents of impropriety to date.  She aimed to see there
never would be. 

“Well, if you’re
sure,” Millicent said with a sad sigh.  “You know how much we’ll miss you.”

She smiled.  “I’ll
miss you, too.  Will you call Dare and offer him the job today?”

Millicent met her
gaze and nodded.  “Absolutely.  The workload is increasing as we speak.  We can
really use him, although no one can replace you, my friend.”

“I appreciate
that, but I think Dare will do just fine.”

When Belle stepped
out of Millicent’s office, her mind preoccupied, she hadn’t noticed Dare
standing in the hallway talking to Steven until she’d slammed into him.  He
reached out strong arms to steady her.  “Careful,” he said, smiling into her
eyes.

“What are you
doing here?” she asked in surprise.

“Good to see you,
too,” he said, laughing lightly. 

Standing so near
to him, she felt her heartbeat quicken.  His gaze swept over her, which caused
her face to warm.  He watched her curiously.  “Are you feeling all right?” he
asked with concern.

She couldn’t tell
him she’d just made a life altering decision—one that would prompt him to make
a life altering decision, so she stared at him blankly.

“She’s just
exhausted,” Steven commented with a chuckle.  “And for good reason, it sounds
like.”  He burst out laughing.  “Dare, I can just see Belle trudging up that dune,
leaving you in her … sand.  The little lawyer that could…” he quipped,
referencing the children’s tale about the little engine that could.  He laughed
again, obviously pleased with himself.

Belle felt a blush
spill across her cheeks.  Had Dare been joking about her to Steven?  Was she a
joke?  She caught his gaze, and he didn’t miss the flash of hurt in her
lavender eyes.

Instinctively, he
reached out to soothe her—he hadn’t spoken to Steven about her in the way he
had intimated.  Belle was not a joke to him—would never be.  He had spoken
about her admiringly.  He still couldn’t believe how she had powered up that
dune as if it were no more difficult than a stroll through the park.

Millicent stepped
into the hallway then, her face registering pleasure at finding Dare there. 
“Just the man I need to speak to,” she said eagerly.  “Do you have a minute?”

He glanced at
Belle uncertainly.  He needed to talk to her first, but it wasn’t to be.  She
stepped away from him and to his surprise, left Legal Aid without so much as a
backwards glance.

After leaving
Legal Aid, Belle didn’t go home.  Steven’s words earlier had stung, and she
wanted desperately to get her mind off of them.  He had laughed at her.  Had
Dare been laughing at her, too?  Joking about her, or their trip together?  She
couldn’t bear the thought, particularly when she’d realized just how much she
cared for him and … just as she had forfeited something so precious to her for
him—for them—her job at Legal Aid. 

Instead of heading
home, she’d gone for a walk in the park.  During her stroll, she had called
Jacob Biggs and explained she could devote herself to work at Elm Place on a
near full-time basis.  He had been thrilled.  She hadn’t committed to a forty-hour
work week as yet, though she wasn’t exactly certain why.  She decided she would
slow the pace somewhat.  It was definitely time.