Silver Wedding (26 page)

'Perhaps you should explain it to her.'

'No, Carlo.' For the second time Frank felt that he was actually acting out a part on stage. 'No, because you see, in a way I don't want to lose her from the London side of things, even though I think in my heart you're right. It's best for the company that she should go up North and get Palazzo into a different league, a national league.'

'That's what I thought,' Carlo said, believing it.

'So I'm the wrong one to persuade her.'

'Suppose she thinks I am banishing her away?'

'She can't think that, Carlo, haven't you all the documentation d surveys and inquiries to prove you were thinking of it ages back?'

Carlo nodded. He had, of course.

Frank let the breath out slowly between his teeth. Nowhere in that whole paperwork did Frank Quigley's name appear, in fact in the files there were several letters dissenting slightly and wondering whether Miss East would be better kept in London.

He couldn't be faulted now.

Frank did not have long to wait. Joy burst into his office, eyes blazing and clutching a piece of paper in her hand.

'Is this your doing?' she asked.

'I have no idea what you're talking about.' He was bland, unruffled.

'Like hell you don't, you're sending me away. By God you're not going to get away with this, Frank. I'm not going to be shunted out of your sight when things get too hot to handle.'

'Sit down,' he said.

'Don't tell me what to do.'

He walked past her and called out to his secretary in the next room, 'Diana, can we have a big pot of coffee? Miss East and I are about to have a row and we need fuel.'

'Don't think I'm bowled over by that kind of witticism,' Joy said.

'It wasn't a witticism, it was the plain unvarnished truth. Now what is this about? Is this Carlo's plan to put you on the board and give you responsibility for the expansion?'

'Carlo's plan, don't give me Carlo's plan. It's your plan to get rid of me.'

His eyes were cold. 'Don't let's add paranoia to everything else.'

'To what else, what else are you talking about?'

His voice was low and hard. Til tell you what else. You and I loved each other, I still love you. We agreed to make love, you were the one looking after contraception. When it no longer worked for you to look after it, it would have been fair to tell me, and let me be in charge of that side. Yes, Joy, that would have been the fair thing. It was not fair to allow me to conceive a child by accident.'

'I would have thought you'd be glad to prove you were able to,' she snapped.

'No. You would have thought wrong. Then to continue your unfairness you will not let me know what your plans are for the child we conceived. I have agreed that it's your responsibility if that's what you want. You said you would let me know. You have not let me know. You have played some kind of game with me throughout. I don't know any more than I knew at Christmas time.'

She was silent.

'And now you come screaming in here with some cock and bull story that I'm banishing you off to the provinces whereas the truth is that I did everything in my power to get you to stay here.

You can believe this or not as you wish but that is the case.'

There was a knock on the door and Diana came in with the coffee. She laid it on the desk between them.

'Is the row over?' she asked.

'No, it's just getting to the peak,' Frank smiled.

'I don't believe you,' Joy said when Diana had left. 'Carlo never had a thought of his own.'

Frank went to a file and showed her a letter. In black and white it said that it might be a waste of Joy East's capabilities to have her tied up away from the nerve centre of the business. He told her that there were more. He could find them if she needed proof.

'Then it's Carlo, he can't bear the shameless unmarried mother bit... it's he who's sending me away.'

Joy, I warned you about the danger of paranoia. If you look through these files that survey was commissioned back in January.

Months before you made your announcement.'

'That bloody survey. Who are they anyway? They seem like a Mickey Mouse outfit to me,' she grumbled.

Frank had a moment's regret, she was so sharp no complaint and bright, her thinking was exactly on the same line as his own. What a pity that it had to end in this acrimony and games-playing.

'Well, however they are Carlo believes everything they say, and they may have a point, you know. You said a lot of it yourself already, long ago, before all this.'

'I know." She had to admit that this was true.

'So what will you do?'

I’ll make up my own mind without any patronizing pats on the head from you,' she said.

'As you wish, Joy, but may I remind you, this is my office and it was you who came to see me. It's not unreasonable that I should ask since you seem determined to involve me.'

'When I've decided what I'm going to do, I'll let you know,' she said.

'You said that before.'

'But that was only about my child, this is about your company.

You have a right to know."

He sat for a long time staring ahead of him after she left, her cup of coffee undrunk. He thought she had looked frightened and a little uncertain. But perhaps he was only imagining it.

She was a clever woman and she knew that she could make him sweat it out not knowing what she was going to say next and where she was going to say it.

He thought about it again that evening in their apartment.

Renata sat on one side of their big marble fireplace looking into the flames and he sat on the other. There were often long companionable silences between them. But that night he said nothing at all.

Renata eventually spoke.

'Is it boring sometimes being with me in the evenings?' There was no complaint in her voice. She was asking as she might have asked the time or whether they should turn on the news on television.

'No, it's not boring,' Frank said truthfully, 'It's restful, actually.'

'That is good,' Renata said, pleased. 'You are a very good husband to me, and sometimes I wish I had more fire and light and sparkle.'

'Oh Jesus, I get enough of that at work, it's like a Guy Fawkes bonfire. No, you're fine the way you are.'

And he nodded to himself, as if agreeing with what he had I just said. He didn't want to change her for a different model, a brighter shinier brand.

The weeks passed with no further word from Joy, the plans for the expansion continued. Carlo said that Joy East was certainly giving it a lot of attention, whether she intended to go or not was anyone's guess.

'Don't force her,' Frank advised. 'She'll go, but not before she's ready.'

He hoped he had read it right. Because she was succeeding in unsettling him.

He got an ornate invitation to a silver wedding celebration for Desmond and Deirdre Doyle. He looked at it grimly. In ten years possibly he and Renata might be sending out something similar. But he wondered if it were likely.

He wondered also what Desmond had to celebrate, a wedding that everyone had assumed was shotgun even though it turned out not to have been the case. A lifetime of being snubbed by the awful O'Hagan family back in Dublin. A life's work getting nowhere fast in Palazzo. Difficult children. The eldest shacked up with some out-of-work actor, apparently, the boy hightailing it back to Mayo of all places, and Helen. A nun, a very odd, disturbed girl. Frank didn't like to think about Helen Doyle who had appeared twice in his life, both times trailing disaster behind her and around her.

No, the Doyles had little to celebrate, which was probably why they were having this party. An unlikely outing it was going to be.

But not as unlikely as the outing that Renata told him about when he came home from work. Joy East has invited us to dinner, just you and me and her, she says.' 'Did she say why?'

'I did ask her, and she said she would like to have a talk to us.'

'Is it at her house?'

'No, she said that you always say when something has to be said it should be said on neutral ground.' Renata sounded puzzled.

Frank's stomach churned with fear.

'I don't know what she means by that,' he managed to say.

'Well, she said she's booking a table in this restaurant... and that she checked with Diana that you are free, so she telephoned me to see if I were free.'

'Yes. Well.'

'Do you not want to go?' Renata sounded disappointed.

'She's been very odd lately, this pregnancy has unhinged her a bit I think, that and the move . . . not that she's said yes or no to that, by the way. Can we get out of it do you think?'

'Not without being very rude. But I thought you liked her?'

Renata looked confused.

'I do, I did, it's not that. She's a bit unbalanced. Leave it with me.'

'She said to ring her tonight.' Renata seemed withdrawn.

'Yeah, I will. I have to go out again anyway. I'll ring her while I'm out.'

He got into his car and drove to Joy's house. He rang the doorbell and knocked, but there was no reply.

He went to a public telephone and called her. She answered immediately.

'Why didn't you let me in?'

'I didn't want to.'

'You told me to call.'

'I told you to telephone, it's a different thing.' 'Joy, don't do this, don't have a scene in front of Renata, it's iot fair on her, she's done nothing to deserve it, nothing. It's cruel.'

'Are you begging, do I hear you begging?'

'You can hear what you goddamn like, but just think, what harm has she ever done you?'

'Does this mean yes or no to my invitation?' Joy asked in a cool voice.

'Listen to me . ..'

'No, I am not going to listen any more. Yes or no?' There was a threat in the question.

'Yes.'

'I thought so,' said Joy East, and hung up.

It was the same restaurant where they had lunch last January. When Joy's stomach had been flat and when Nice's in-laws had seen them laughing. Now it was different.

Joy, still on mineral water to Frank's enormous relief, was gracious and anxious that they should be well seated and choose wisely from the menu. She did most of the talking, as Frank was edgy and Renata very reserved.

'You know the way in films they say: "You must be wondering why I asked you to come here tonight. . ." ' she tinkled.

'You said you had something to talk about.' Renata was polite.

'I do. I have come to some decisions finally after a lot of thought and I think it's fair that I should tell you about them. Frank because of work. . . and Renata, you because of Frank.'

He felt the floodgates begin to open. God damn her to the pit of hell. It wasn't even a woman scorned, it wasn't that kind of fury. He would have played straight with her. Or straightish anyway.

'Yes?' Renata's voice was anxious. Frank hadn't trusted himself to speak.

'Well, about this baby. . .' She looked from one to the other. And waited. It seemed like an age but it was probably three seconds.

Joy continued: 'I think it is going to change my life much more than I imagined. For a month or two I wondered if I'd done the right thing. Perhaps even at this late stage, I should give the child away, give it to some couple who would have a loving secure home. I might not turn out to be such a great mother figure, all on my own.'

She waited for one of them to deny this politely. Neither of them did.

'But then I thought no. I went into this knowing what it was about, so I must go through with it.' She smiled happily.

'Yes, but what has this to do with us ... exactly. . . ?' Renata asked. Her face was fearful.

'It has this to do with you. If I were going to give the child to anyone I would most certainly have offered you the chance.

You would be such good parents, this I know. But since I'm not, and since you might have harboured some hopes ...'

'Never ... I never thought of it,' Renata gasped.

'Hadn't you? I'm sure you did, Frank. After all you haven't been able to get any joy out of the adoption societies, Carlo tells me.'

'My father has no right to speak of such things,' Renata said, her face a dark red.

'No, perhaps not. But he does of course. Anyway, it was to make these matters clear that I asked you here, and to tell you that I will be going North, soon, much sooner than anyone expected. I've sold my house here, and bought a really lovely old Georgian farmhouse in need of repair, but magnificently proportioned, small and beautiful, and a perfect place for a child to grow up. If he or she is only going to have me around, then the poor love had better have a pony and somewhere to play as well!' Her smile was all-embracing.

Renata took a deep breath. 'And will the child's father be involved at all?'

'Not at all. The father is someone I met casually on a packaging conference, a ship that passed in the night.'

Renata's hand flew to her mouth in an involuntary gesture.

'Is that so shocking?' Joy asked. 'I wanted to have a child, he was as good a person as anyone else.'

'I know, I mean it was just that I thought.. .' Her voice trailed away and she looked at Frank, whose face was stony.

'What did you just think, Renata?' Joy was like honey now.

'I know this is silly.' Renata looked from one to the other. 'I suppose I was afraid that the child might have been ... Frank's child. And that this is why you even contemplated offering it to us ... please, I don't know what I am doing talking like this . .. please.' There were tears in her eyes.

Frank was frozen, he still didn't know which way Joy would jump. He couldn't put out his hand to comfort his wife.

Joy spoke deliberately and slowly: 'Oh, Renata, surely you couldn't have thought that Frank and I? We're too alike to be a number, to be the Grand Affair of the century. Oh no. And anyway. Frank a father, that's not very likely, that wouldn't have been on the cards, would it?'

'What. . . what do you mean ... ?'

'Oh, Carlo told me about his problems.. . I'm afraid your father is very indiscreet sometimes, but only when he knows it won't go further. . . Please don't say back to him that I ever mentioned it. But he was always so sad that Frank did not give him the grandson . ..'

Frank spoke for the first time for a long while. He thought he had managed to take the shake out of his voice.

'And your child? Shall you tell him it was a one-night stand in a hotel room?'

'No, no, of course not, something much more romantic and sad. An untraceable wonderful person, long dead. A poet maybe. Something sad and beautiful.'

Somehow they finished the meal, somehow they found other things to talk about. The hurt went a little from Renata's eyes, and the lines of tension from Frank's face. And the serenity and bloom of pregnancy settled ever more on Joy East. She paid the bill confidently with her credit card and when Renata went to the Ladies' she sat and looked calmly across the table at Frank.

'Well, you won,' he said.

'No, you won.'

'How did I win, tell me? You frightened me to death and now you're denying me any part in the child's life. How is that winning?'

'You got what you wanted. You got me out.'

'You're not starting that again?'

'I don't need to. I investigated the market-research bureau. They told me you hired them, they even had the date, it was just after we had lunch in this restaurant. As usual it turned out the way you wanted it to. I'm out of your hair. The coast is clear for the next project. I do wonder who she'll be. But I'll never know. Any more than you'll know what it's like to play with a two-year-old, your two-year-old. Because you're not capable of fathering one. That's both your alibi and my excuse for cutting you out.'