Silver Bay Song (9 page)

I pulled the roof up on my car before we set off toward home, he sat quietly next to me and it began to piss me off. I hadn’t done anything wrong, so why was he being such a jerk about it all? After all, he asked me about Jay. When we got back to my house, dots of rain splashed on the windshield.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Nothing,” he shrugged.

“Crap, you have sulked all the way back. Is it because of Jay?”

“I suppose so, yes.”

“Why?”

“Because he gave you something I can’t,” he answered sourly and pushed the car door open.

“What does that mean?” I demanded.

“I just don’t want you to get your hopes up about this,” he shrugged.

“You mean about us,” I clarified.

“What do you want from it?” he asked turning his head to face me.

“I don’t know,” I answered with a sigh. “Is this your way to tell me that this is a summer fling and that in a few weeks you will go back to your life and fiancé and I will just be a thing you screwed whenever you felt like it?”

“I never said that, I have no intention of going back to Beth,” he said shaking his head. “I just don’t want you to think that we have a real future, because the truth is, we probably don’t.”

Heat raced to my head, “Do you not think that is something you should have told me yesterday, you know, before screwing my brains out?” I barked.

“And here it is,” he climbed out of the car. I climbed out and slammed my car door shut.

“How dare you,” I snapped. “How dare you do this to me. I am not a tramp or cheap. I deserve better than a screw when you are horny.”

“I know and I don’t want to lead you in to thinking that there will be a happy ever after, because nothing could be further from the truth. I’m sorry, Skylar, but this is just two adults enjoying each other’s company and having sex.”

“Was,” I retorted. “This
was
about an asshole using me to get his kicks and then dropping me when he’s had his fill. Well, you know what, Kaden Wright, you are a dick.”   

“Come on, Skylar, don’t tell me you were expecting something to come out of this?”

“Am I that bad then?” I demanded. He just stared blankly. “Thanks, you really know how to make a girl feel better.” I began walking to my house.

“I thought you were just along for the ride. I didn’t think you were expecting a ring out it.” I spun around, rain had soaked through his shirt.

“I wouldn’t want a ring from you if you were the last man on the planet. Who would want to marry an egotistical prick like you anyway? I am grateful you showed me how you truly felt before this went any further, so thanks for that.” I yelled and walked towards my house.

“Skylar… Skylar.”

“Fuck you, Kaden!” I snapped and hurried inside my house. Hot tears stung my eyes, tears of pain and tears of fury. At that moment, had he knocked my door, I probably would have hit him.

Ten

Kaden

              “You fucking idiot,” I roared, launching the bag across the room. What the hell did I just do? I got all pissy over her dead fiancé and then to add insult to her wounds, I insinuate that she was just a lay.
Way to go, Dickhead!

              I pulled a beer from my fridge and drank it dry, then another, my hands were shaking, but this wasn’t symptoms, this was rage. Why would I throw everything away? The doctor told me I was going to be okay, that they could manage the MS, was I still considering ending my life?

              Three.

              Four.

              Five beers later and I started to feel a little calmer. Until I saw her standing on her deck in the rain, gazing at the ocean in the storm. She caught me looking, turned around and slammed her door shut.

              Six.

Seven beers and I picked up my phone, I wasn’t totally trashed, but on my way, I dialled the only number I had memorized, Parker Price, the moody bass player in the band, the only one I trusted.

“Hello?” he said into my ear.

“Parker, it’s me, Ka…uh, Max.”

“Where the fuck are you, man?” he yelled.

“A small seaside town called Silver Bay in North Carolina,” I answered.

“Everyone is looking for you, even your mother has been here, she’s at your house. Call her and tell her you are okay.”

“I can’t, I uh, I fucked up and I need some shit, do you have anything?”

“No, I am clean, have been for weeks. Come home, I’ll help you, we all will.”

“Help me, how?”

“With your addiction, there are clinics and…”

“Parker, I am not an addict, I am just sick and right now I want to get shit faced and maybe smoke a little weed.” I snapped. “I have to go, don’t tell anyone I called.” I ended the call and drank another beer. Flopping down on the couch, I remember my eyes feeling so heavy…

Ding Dong!

My eyes snapped open, the house was lit up like it was the holidays and the TV was on. The room smelled stuffy and as I slowly sat up, I could see my living room floor was littered with empty beer bottles.

Ding Dong!

The noise echoed out and vibrated in my aching head. I staggered to the door and pulled it open, Skylar frowned. She held out some clothes and the bag containing the box of condoms.

“You look like shit,” she remarked handing the items to me.

“Thanks,” I grumbled.

“I just need to know something. Was it pity, did you sleep with me because you felt sorry for me?”

“No.” I frowned.

“Then why did you sleep with me?”

“I am attracted to you, you are beautiful and sexy and I wanted you more than I have ever wanted anybody.” I scoffed.

“So, what changed things?” she asked. I felt too crappy to go into this.

“You, the way you spoke of Jay, I know I would never be that for you.” I answered.

“You are right, because he was my soulmate and you only get that kind of love once in your life.” She agreed. “Right, well, thank you for your honesty.”

“Skylar, please come in.”

“No,” she sighed.

“Please, we can be adults, adults who just so happen to have amazing sex with each other, don’t you want that? No strings, no commitments, don’t you just want to have a little fun?” She thought for a few moments, maybe all was not lost. “Look, I am a mess, I need a shower and a shave, so please come in and make some coffee and then we can talk.”

“I am not sleeping with you again,” she frowned.

“Coffee and a chat,” I confirmed. She nodded and stepped inside. My heart jump started again. Maybe I felt more for her than I first thought.  

I took two Tylenol and shaved as quickly as I could while the water for the shower ran. As I washed my hair, two hands moved over my shoulders as cold breasts pressed against my back, shortly followed by lips kissing my neck. I turned to face her, she smiled slightly,

“What we have is real simple, we take it one day at a time and see where it goes, okay?”

“Okay,” I nodded and she firmly took hold of me.

“You are going to need this,” she said holding out a wrapped condom in her hand. I thought I was going to have to beg her for forgiveness, grovel even, but no, here she was, naked in my shower wanting me to make love to her.

“Are you sure about this?” I asked.

“I have never been more certain of anything,” she nodded and kissed me. “Just sex, no strings attached?”

“If you are okay with that?” I nodded.

“I am, are you?”

“Yes,” I affirmed.

Something about the way she acted concerned me for all of three seconds, in that time I was already inside of her and my mind went blank. She had wrapped her legs around my waist as I pushed her against the tiled wall of the shower, the warm water rained down on us, our mouths danced and her nails scratched up my back again, it drove me insane.

I liked this girl, really liked her and began to doubt my own feelings. Her orgasm broke as she cried out, and mine followed shortly after. She was incredible and I didn’t know if I could handle just being someone she wanted to have sex with. Maybe I did want more.

I gazed into her smouldering eyes, she bit on her bottom lip and I kissed her again. As our bodies parted, she showered with my shampoo and we both climbed out. Lifting her clothes from the floor and wrapping a towel around her body, she said she would see me later.

What? Did I just get used? 

She had gone by the time I had found another towel and wrapped it around my waist. I hurried to my room and pulled on some shorts. I rushed over to her house and knocked on the door. She pulled it open now wearing a light pink dress,

“What just happened?” I asked.

“I believe it’s called casual sex, I woke up horny, came to see you, screwed you and left.” She explained flippantly. “You did say that’s what you wanted, no strings, no ties or commitment.”

“I know what I said, but I think you took it the wrong way,” I frowned.

“No, I don’t think so, I am now satisfied and I suppose you are too?” I nodded. “Good, job done then, you are satisfied, I am satisfied, we are both satisfied.”

“This is what you want?” I asked.

“I don’t think it matters what I want,” she retorted. “Now, if you don’t mind, I have a date this evening, so I need to get ready.”

“A date?”

“Yes, so um, maybe I’ll see you tomorrow or something,” she tried to close the door.

“Skylar, what is going on?”

“Nothing, well, nothing that you need to worry about,” she replied. “I’ll drop by tomorrow, okay?”

“For more sex?” I asked bemused.

“That depends on how horny I am when I wake up.” She smiled slightly and closed the door. I just stood there like a dork. What the hell was going on?

After an embarrassing amount of time just trying to fathom what was going on, I turned around and went home. She was playing me, there was no doubt about it, I didn’t like being used or how it made me feel. But I saw what she was doing, she was teaching me a lesson, not that I would let on to her that I knew her game.

I returned to my house and made some breakfast even though it was almost three, I wanted cereal and enjoyed it. I watched the sea for a long time wondering about her date and who she had gone out with. Or was this just another part of her game and there was no real date?

Shortly after seven, I had been sat watching a movie on TV as the screech of breaks on a car disturbed me.  I sat up and gazed out of the window.

Keith, she was going on a date with Keith. Was she crazy?

I watched them leave, he opened the car door for her, she glanced at me as she buckled her seat belt. As he got to his door, he looked over at me and smiled. Asshole!

I watched them drive away and was so angry at her, I decided to go for a swim and cool off. The sun was beginning to set as I ran towards the water and dived in, how could she be so stupid to trust him again. He tried to rape her, well maybe not rape, but he ripped her clothes open and groped her. Why would she go out with him again, to prove a point? What point? That she was stupid and naïve, that she needed someone to look after her? I sure seemed that way.

I swam up and down that shore line, fuelled by fury alone. Everything was fine, right up until I got a cramp and barely made it out of the water. I lay on the sand gazing up at the stars and listened to the waves as they crashed on the shore. When the pain in my ribs alleviated slightly I sat up and began heading back to my house. As I got to the sand separating our houses, I could hear voices.

“Well, you scared me, Keith.”

“I really am sorry, Skylar. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you or even scare you.” He replied.

“It’s all over with now,” she said as I reached my steps.

“Yes, I am just grateful you allowed me to apologise.”

I couldn’t help but to look over at her front door, she caught me watching. “Would you like some coffee?” she asked him. What? She invited him in.

“As much as I like to take you up on that offer, under the circumstances, I don’t think that would be wise.” 

“Okay, well I’ll see you later then,” she said dryly.

“Sure, uh,” he pecked her cheek, “Goodnight,” he said. I rolled my eyes and hurried to my door. She let him kiss her.

I slammed my door shut and went to the fridge, unfortunately, I didn’t have anything in there. I had forgotten I had used all of my food. I grabbed my keys and headed out of my door, locking it behind me.

“Kaden,” Skylar called out. “Can I talk to you?”

“I’m busy,” I barked and climbed into my car. I started the engine as my passenger door pulled open.

“It wasn’t a date,” she said. “He just wanted to say he was sorry and I thought it would be a good way to wind you up. I’m sorry. I am not usually like this.”

“I thought I was getting to know you, Skylar, but the truth is, I don’t know you at all.”

“I give people the benefit of the doubt, is that a crime?” she asked.

“He was going to rape you and you accepted his apology?”

“He wouldn’t have raped me,” she sighed. “I uh, I can’t do this, Kaden. I’ll not bother you again.” She shut the car door. I watched as she rushed onto the beach. I turned off my engine and hurried after her. She ran towards the water’s edge and dropped down onto her knees on the sand.

“Why are we putting each other through this?” I asked from behind her. She turned her head and I could see the moonlight glisten on her wet cheeks, I had made her cry and that felt pretty shitty.

“I thought I could take the lead, show you I could be hard and not let it bother me that you only wanted sex from me, but the truth is, Kaden it does bother me, it hurts a lot to think that you feel nothing for me. That I am a lay and nothing more.”

“I never meant it to come across that way.” I sighed and sat beside her. “The truth is I like you, a lot and I am sorry I made you feel used. Now I know a little something of how it feels, it’s not nice.” I admitted. “I would never have slept with you if I felt that you were only a lay. I have done that to girls in the past and I am not proud of it. Having you leave me this morning after that shower, it made me feel used and I didn’t like it.” I reached over and took her quivering hand, “The only reason I said that to you yesterday was because I got scared. I will never be Jay for you, the way your eyes sparkle when you talk about him made me jealous and I know that I may never be able to give you any sort of future. You deserve so much more than I can offer.”

“Jay was amazing, but he was lazy and stubborn, although for me he was the one, it will take someone special to fill the void he left in my life. Up until you weirded out on me yesterday, I had forgotten about the pain of losing him. I was able to talk about him and it not hurt, but now… I just don’t know why you thought I needed limitations. I was happy taking it day by day. I was happy because you were happy and that is all that mattered to me. Like it or not, Kaden, I am falling for you, I can’t help it. If you don’t feel the same, then I will have to live with it. It’s not the first time my heart has broken and it won’t be the last.”

“I’m an asshole, Skylar, a dick even, I don’t deserve you.”

“Why would you think that?”

“Karma,” I sighed. “Like I said, I have done a lot of stuff I am not proud of. Then I met you and you are amazing, the first girl I have met that I can actually see a future with and that scares me more than anything.”

She stared for a few moments. “Can’t we just go back to how it was before? I mean, if you want to.”

“Even if there is no happy ending?” I asked.

“You are worth the risk,” she sniffed and squeezed my hand.

“I am not, but if you are happy to go back to the amazing sex, more times a day than I care to imagine, hot dates mixed with a little fun, then sure, we can do that.”