Shoreline Drive (26 page)

Taylor groaned, but she couldn’t help smiling. It was sort of cool to have someone to talk to who was a little older, but not, like, parental old.

“So here’s what I think about Jo and Harrison. Are you ready?”

Merry paused dramatically and Taylor gave the obligatory eyeroll and snotty “No,” but she wasn’t deterred.

“I think we should push them to get married.”

“Wait.” This time Taylor did pull away. “Seriously?”

“Dead serious.” Merry did stern eyebrows for half a second, then ruined it with a smile. “They’ve been dating for years now. They’re totally in love, their lives are already intertwined. It’s very possible that Mom is overthinking this whole thing.”

“According to Jo,” Taylor said, in her most mature voice, “blending families is very complicated.”

“That might be true, but it’s not the kind of complicated you can solve without jumping in and working it out.”

“See, that’s what I think, too!” Taylor said excitedly. “We can figure it out as we go along, if we’re all willing to try.”

“I don’t believe Jo’s unwilling to try. But she’s afraid of making another big mistake that will affect all of us.”

“All of who?” Taylor cocked her head.

“All her kids. Ella, me, and you.” Merry pinned her with a severe stare. “And do not say one word about you not being Jo’s kid. I don’t want to hear it. Of all of us, you’re the one she’s most scared of messing up.”

A lump jumped into Taylor’s throat, making it hard to talk. She swallowed around it as best she could. “Why do you say that?”

The corners of Merry’s mouth turned down. “Because she’s already made a ton of mistakes with Ella and me, and we’ve worked through them. Well, we’re in the process. But with you, it’s like she has a chance to finally be the mother she should’ve been to Ella and me. And speaking as someone who’s staring down the barrel of motherhood and quaking in her brand-new paddock boots, trust me—Jo is scared to death that she’ll screw it up. And this time she won’t have alcoholism as an excuse for failure.”

Merry sat back in her corner of the couch, but Taylor caught her hand and squeezed it.

It had cost Merry something to share all of that, Taylor could tell. And she could only repay Merry for treating her like a grown-up one way: with honesty. “That’s a lot to think about. I’m not sure I can believe that’s totally where Jo is coming from—it’s easier, in a stupid way, to believe she just doesn’t want me as one of her daughters. But I’ll think it over, I promise.”

“Try the idea on for size, see how it fits.” Merry smiled faintly, her eyes bright in the slanting natural light pouring in the slot window near the office ceiling. “And even if you can’t believe I’m right about Jo’s fears and feelings, you can believe this. I’d be happy to have you as my little sister.”

In some ways, that was even harder to swallow, after everything Taylor had done to try and break up Ella and Grady, and what a little snot she’d been to Merry—but as she stared at Merry’s open, honest face, Taylor’s breath caught.

“You mean it,” she whispered. “You really mean it.”

“I told you,” Merry said, smiling. “I could get used to this older-sister gig. It’s more fun than I would’ve thought—and rewarding.”

On pure impulse, Taylor pushed up on her knees and threw her arms around Merry, hugging her quickly before scrambling off the couch. Heat scorched up her neck and over the tips of her ears, but she managed not to stare down at the tips of her brown leather boots. Instead, she held Merry’s gaze and said, “For the record, you’re pretty good at the big-sister thing. And maybe you’re a good mom, too.”

“Thanks.” Merry’s voice was a little husky. “Also, for the record, you give good hugs.”

Taylor glanced away, thoroughly embarrassed and pleased. Casting around for a way to break the taut, charged moment, she blurted, “Hey, did you know Ben’s here?”

Merry stood up and went to the office door to peer down the barn hallway. Taylor could tell the moment she spotted her husband’s medical kit outside Java’s stall by the miniature thundercloud crackling with lightning over her head. “That man! I told him not to go into Java’s stall on his own.”

“See, you’re a good wife, too,” Taylor said encouragingly.

Merry’s sudden hectic blush was visible even in the low light, and a rush of awkwardness swamped Taylor. “I mean because you worry about his safety, and like, nag him to take care of himself. That’s all!”

“I know what you meant,” Merry protested, voice gone high and breathless. She was still flushed, and Taylor wrinkled her nose.

“Yikes. TMI.”

“Oh, but it’s all okay when we’re talking about
your
boy problems?” Merry sent her an amused smile.

“That’s different. Matt and I aren’t even friends, at the moment. We’re not doing the nasty.”

“Good, you better not be. But for your information, it’s not nasty when you’re married,” Merry said primly.

“It is when it’s your sister,” Taylor said daringly, and she felt something in her chest expand like a balloon filling with helium when Merry only rolled her eyes and laughed in reply.

“Time for me to be a good wife,” Merry said, smiling as she started down the hall toward Java’s stall.

“Good luck,” Taylor called, heart racing and full of the fun kind of nervousness. “Go give you husband hell for disobeying orders.”

She raised her voice enough to carry down the hall and maybe give poor Dr. Ben a little warning. “Somebody’s in trooooouble…”

After all, if she was going to be the bratty baby sister of the family, she had some lost time to make up for.

Chapter Twenty-One

Give your husband hell for disobeying orders.

“Oh, I intend to,” Merry muttered as she marched up to Java’s stall and peered inside. Her heart thumped erratically and her palms sprang damp and cold with fear at what she might see.

Ben crumpled and broken on the ground, blood like thick black ink trickling from his head, trampled under the rampaging stallion’s unshod hooves.

But once her eyes adjusted to the gloom and the haze of remembered terror cleared, what she saw was Ben, whole and perfect, standing with his back to the stall door as he ran competent, sensitive hands over Java’s quivering flanks.

The stallion’s ears flicked nervously back and forth. He swished his tail as if brushing away a pesky fly, but otherwise he seemed calm.

All the air went out of Merry in a silent whoosh, and she closed her jaw on the relief that wanted to explode out of her as scolding and recriminations. Any outburst could startle Java out of his complacence and have him acting out against the nearest threat … which would be Ben.

She crossed her arms on the chest-high stall door, and watched quietly as Ben went through the rest of his exam. He spoke softly to the stallion as he worked, a low, murmuring undertone that sent shivers all through Merry.

The last time she’d heard that tone from her husband was in the darkness before the sun rose this morning. He’d been smoothing his palms over her skin, making her writhe restlessly and arch into his touch, and while he gentled her down, he’d kept up a tender whispered commentary on how she looked in his bed, how she felt in his arms.

By the time he finally reached the center of her body, Merry was nearly delirious with need.

No man she’d ever been with had spent as much time as Ben. He studied her sensitive spots, which things made her moan and or cry out, as if he were preparing for an exam that would determine the entire course of his future.

If Merry were grading him, he’d get an A-plus.

Ben circled around the stallion and caught sight of Merry outside the stall. He looked guilty at being caught with Java for about half a second, but then his eyes narrowed.

“I thought you’d be mad. What are you smiling about?”

Merry hastily wiped the cat-in-cream expression off her face and replaced it with a stern scowl. “I am mad,” she whispered, so as not to spook Java. “This horse is still dangerous.”

He opened his mouth to argue, but she held up a hand to forestall it. “And more importantly, you promised me, Ben.”

“You’re right.” He sounded supremely annoyed about it, but Merry could read anger at himself in the tightness of his mouth. The horse beside him picked up a hoof and stomped a little, nervously, and Ben put an absent, calming hand on his withers. Exhaling slowly, Ben attempted a sheepish smile. “I guess I’m not used to having someone worry about me.”

“Well, get used to it,” was Merry’s advice. “Alex and I kind of like you. We want to keep you around for a long time.”

That turned up the volume on Ben’s smile. “Where is the brat, anyway?”

“With Auntie Ella. She wanted to spend some time with him—which is good practice for when she has kids of her own.”

Ben shook his head. “You are really pulling for Ella and Grady to tie the knot and settle down right away, aren’t you?”

“What are they waiting for?” Merry threw up her hands. “Alex needs a cousin to play with! And how fun would it be to plan another wedding?”

The humor died out of Ben’s expression. Busying himself with checking Java’s hooves, his face was hidden when he said, “A real wedding, you mean? With more than two weeks to plan?”

“No,” Merry said, more sharply than she intended, but good grief. This man. “That’s not what I mean, at all. Our wedding was perfect—I wouldn’t change a thing.”

Ben straightened, a slight flush in his cheeks from being bent over. Or maybe from her answer. “Except maybe to stop me from making that call to my parents beforehand.”

There was the familiar sardonic tone Ben used whenever he mentioned his parents—but running underneath it was something else, something Merry couldn’t quite place. Hurt? Disappointment?

She puzzled over it as Ben gave the stallion a farewell pat to the haunches and unlatched the stall door. She stood back to let him swing it open enough to slip out of the stall, admiring the swift economy of his movements. She could picture him in a hospital, performing some precise, difficult surgery that would save someone’s life. She didn’t say it out loud, but part of her could understand where Ben’s father was coming from in his inability to understand the choice Ben had made to leave the high-risk, high-reward life of a surgeon for the simpler existence of a country vet.

“Have you heard from them since the wedding?” she asked instead.

He shook his head over his medical kit. “It’s been a week,” he said tensely. “I would have thought my father would do something by now.”

A week, Merry thought, with some amazement. It felt longer than seven days since she’d first crossed over the threshold of Isleaway Farm as Ben’s wife.

Seven days of slowly learning what it felt like to be loved by Ben Fairfax. Seven days of playing with Alex at bathtime, all three of them ending up soaked and laughing; seven days of working side by side at the vet hospital, looking up from filing to catch Ben quirking that sweet half-smile across the office.

And seven nights filled with the kind of passion Merry had spent years searching for—and only found once she finally stopped looking.

She cleared her throat and refocused on the conversation. “Maybe your dad heard you, and he’s trying to respect your wishes and leave us alone.”

“Maybe.” But Ben didn’t sound convinced. Shaking it off like a dog emerging from a dip in the lake, he hefted the strap of his kit over his shoulder and said, “Isn’t this supposed to be your day off?”

“I came to talk to Mom about the fund-raiser, and then Taylor wanted to talk to me.”

Ben, who’d heard all about the trials and tribulations of Merry’s attempts to connect with Taylor, arched a brow. “What did she want?”

“She wants Jo and Harrison to get their act together and tie the knot, already. Really—I think she just wants to know that she has family. She’s not going it alone.”

Ben cocked his head. “It’s good not to be alone. You know how glad I am to have you and Alex in my life—I benefited hugely from the fact that you wanted a partner in raising him. But I want you to know … I honestly think you would’ve been fine without me. You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for.”

The words knocked all the breath out of Merry’s lungs. It was as if Ben had dug down to the bottom of her soul where she hid her darkest fear, and dragged it out into the brilliant afternoon light.

When she could speak again, she forced herself to hold Ben’s calm, steady gaze. “That means a lot to me. More than you know. Maybe you’re right and I would’ve been fine. But…”

She swallowed, the feelings gripping her heart so new, so big, she was afraid to give them a name. Ben thought she was strong, though …

“But maybe I don’t want to just be fine,” she said slowly, licking her suddenly dry lips. “Maybe fine isn’t good enough anymore. And with you, my life has a shot at being so much better than fine.”

Not quite a declaration of undying love, but Ben lit up like a bonfire anyway. It was still new enough to give Merry a thrill when Ben put his arm around her waist and matched his steps to hers as they walked out of the barn to his truck.

Someday, she promised herself, she’d figure out how to trust that this new life was hers to keep, that it wouldn’t be snatched from her at a whim. And when that day came, she’d finally be as strong as Ben thought she was.

She’d finally open up her heart and let him read whatever was written there, word for word.

For now, though, she’d settle for a ride home. She could leave her little sedan parked at the barn overnight. Climbing into the cab of the truck on the passenger side, she said, “So … Ella’s not dropping the baby off at our house until after dinner.”

Ben’s lips quirked into the delighted grin that made him look like a naughty little boy. “I thought you were trying to entice your sister into settling down and popping out a kid! Dinnertime with Alex probably isn’t the best way to do that.”

“Well, I don’t want her going into it completely blind,” Merry said generously. “She’s my sister, and I owe her a lot.”

“So you’re letting her try to feed Alex as a warning?”

“A gentle reminder,” Merry corrected him. “That there’s more to babies than dressing them up like dolls and cuddling them.”