Shelter Mountain (27 page)

He led her over to the fire and when she sat there, Paige reached for her hand. “Bad?”

“The baby was gone before she delivered.” To anyone else she might have reported it as very sad. To her inti
mates, she said, “My heart is in a million pieces, it hurts so bad for them.”

Jack brought Mel a small snifter of Remy. She lifted it to her lips with a shaky hand and took a sip, then put it back on the table. She pulled her coat tighter around her, her back to the fire. “You never know where you’re going to find courage,” she said. “My God, those two kids. They clung to each other and got through the worst day of their lives.”

“At least they’re young,” Paige said.

“Yeah, at least that.”

Then the room was silent while Mel absorbed the heat of the fire, quietly partaking of half her brandy. Then she said, “Jack, I want you to go home and get some rest. I’m going to stay with the kids tonight, in case they need me.”

His back straightened immediately. “Mel, Doc can do that. Or you could’ve asked John to stay—Liz is his patient, after all. You’re—”

“I’m going to stay at Doc’s. And I’d like you to go home and try to sleep. Rick’s going to need you tomorrow.”

“I’ll wait here in case—”

“Please,” she said. “Let’s not argue about this. You must know I won’t leave them now.”

“Mel…”

“I’ve made up my mind, Jack. I’ll see you in the morning.”

Although Preacher offered Jack his bed or at least the couch in his apartment, Jack did as he was told and went to the cabin. Of course he didn’t sleep. On a night like this, he really needed his wife’s belly pressed up against him, feeling his son move around in there, alive. But he understood; Mel was as stubborn as she was strong and had she gone home with him, she’d have worried about Liz and Rick all night.

At four in the morning, he’d had all he could take. He got out of bed and dressed. He put on his heavy suede jacket and leather gloves and drove back into town. He parked his truck outside of Doc’s, right next to Rick’s, got out and leaned against the door. He could have let himself into the bar and started coffee, but there was no point in waking the house; Preacher and Paige should be allowed whatever sleep they could manage. This would have deeply affected them, as well.

Jack stood there, unmindful of the cold, his breath swirling in a steamy cloud above him, until the very first rays of winter sun began to creep over the mountain, more than two hours later. He was going to be right there when Mel came out, when she gave up her vigil, and he would get her breakfast and take her home to make sure she got some rest. He spent a lot of time just looking at the ground, wondering how such an unkind thing could happen.

When the door to Doc’s opened, he lifted his head. It was not Mel but Rick who stepped out onto the porch. All Jack could think was, what a damned awful way to become a man. Rick just stood there for a moment, then he slowly stepped down from the porch into the street. He met Jack’s eyes and there was such pain, such loss.

Jack stepped toward him and put a hand behind the boy’s neck, pulling him onto his shoulder. He heard Rick let go a deep, painful sigh. Jack put his other arm around him and Rick let it go. He fell against Jack and the tears began. “Yeah, buddy. Get it out. I got you.”

“Why couldn’t I do anything?” Rick asked softly.

“None of us could, son. It’s damned awful. I’m so sorry.”

Rick cried softly and mournfully, his shoulders shaking while Jack held him. Through all the challenges of this pregnancy, all the sadness surrounding Liz and Rick’s situation and their struggles to get through it like grown-ups, with a little dignity, nothing could have
prepared any of them to face this. The boy who had become a man, who stepped up and took responsibility, leaned against Jack, shattered, quietly weeping in the anguish of grief. His heart was shredded, and Jack’s was aching as he held him.

A single tear traced a path down Jack’s stubbled cheek.

L
iz stayed two nights in Doc’s hospital room, Rick with her the entire time. They did a lot of weeping and holding on to each other. Mel spent a good deal of time there, trying to comfort. She told them that it was important to remember two things: that it was nothing they or anyone else did, and there was no reason to believe that it would ever happen again. It was extremely rare for an intrauterine death not precipitated by eclampsia or another complication of pregnancy, but sadly, it happened from time to time.

Jack and Mel made the arrangements for the burial of Rick and Liz’s baby. Liz wanted to take him home to Eureka, where she’d grown up and her grandparents were buried. And then Liz wanted to stay with her mother, who had become much more sensitive to the young couple, given their tragedy. She extended to Rick the invitation that he was welcome as much and as often as he wanted to be there, for his support was desperately needed to get Liz through these dark days.

Mel grieved. It was certainly not the first fatality for her, but medicine and midwifery in a small town made your patients your friends, and these young people were very special to her. Jack, not really knowing what to do
for his wife, took her to June Hudson’s house in Grace Valley where John and Susan were present with June and Jim and old Doc Hudson. They had a solemn dinner together, talking about their worst moments, their tragic losses. It was far from cheery, but it got Mel through it—remembering that this was the downside of medicine and that she was not alone.

During that dinner, Jack had the passing thought that the need for these clinicians to share their war stories was not unlike what soldiers did, what his Marines had done. It was a leveler; it reminded you that everyone had a role in holding one another up, in sharing the victories and the tragedies.

Rick took his strength from Jack and Preacher, who watched over him closely, spending long hours at the end of the day talking and giving him the sturdiness of their shoulders, the camaraderie of their shared experiences. These men who had been to war had buried those they loved, young lives cut tragically short. Loss was no stranger to them. And Rick had joined their ranks too soon.

The whole town seemed to suffer for Rick and Liz, but it was clear to Paige that Mel’s pain was unique. As she grew round with her own baby’s birth imminent, a time that should bring her great joy, she was too quiet. Paige was familiar with the story of how Mel came to Virgin River, and just as she was about to flee, an abandoned newborn was found on Doc’s porch and Mel put her own needs aside to stay, to take care of that baby until a home could be found for her. For many weeks and months after LillyAnderson had fostered the baby, Mel had gone to the Anderson ranch to hold her. Their bond was a strong one.

So Paige went to the clinic one afternoon and asked Mel to go for a ride with her—she had an errand and didn’t want to go alone, she said. She drove up to the Anderson ranch and Mel said, “What are we doing here?”

“Good medicine,” Paige said. “Come on.”

Paige put her arm around Mel’s shoulders and led her up the porch. When Lilly came to the door, Paige said, “Someone needs to hold a living baby.”

Mel shot her a look, began to shake her head, but Lilly reached for her hand and said, “Of course you do,” and drew her inside.

Little Chloe was sleeping, but that didn’t matter to Lilly. If there was something Mel needed, there wasn’t a person in Virgin River who wouldn’t move heaven and earth to help her. Chloe was almost a year old now. Lilly lifted her daughter out of the crib and handed her to Mel. Mel held that little life against her, drawing strength from the baby’s cuddle, from her sleepy sighs. It wasn’t quite the same as holding a newborn, a healthy baby pulled from its mother’s womb, but it served its purpose. Lilly left Mel alone in the baby’s room and Mel rocked Chloe for a long time while Paige and Lilly had tea in the kitchen. The warmth of life against Mel’s chest seemed to give some healing. Inside her, her own baby kicked and squirmed, letting himself be known. For each movement, even the ones that were uncomfortable, she gave grateful thanks.

On the way back to town, Mel said, “How did you know to do that?”

Paige shrugged. “It hasn’t been that long, Mel. It wasn’t a full-term baby, but—”

For a moment Mel was shocked speechless. Then she reached across the front seat and grabbed Paige’s hand as she drove. “Oh, Paige, I’m so sorry.”

“Thanks, Mel. But—”

“No, I’m
sorry!
We were all so focused on how dangerous your husband was, the fact of losing his baby just didn’t seem…Oh, God, me of all people! That was
your
baby! Paige, please forgive me. I should have helped with your grief. And instead, you’re helping with mine.”

Paige cast her a sweet smile. “I’m so glad I could help.
As for me, I’m going to get another chance. And the next time, it will be safer and easier. Sweeter.”

Mel squeezed her hand. “Have I told you how glad I am you came to town?”

The first week of February arrived, bringing with it the excavation crew. The second week in February brought two baby showers, one in Virgin River at the home of Lilly Anderson and the second one in Grace Valley, hosted by June Hudson and Susan Stone.

As February aged and Mel’s own time drew near, her step might have become slower, but her eyes were brighter and she glowed. Joe Benson brought the final plans to Virgin River and Mel sat beside her husband in his truck and watched as the foundations for their house and the one-room guest house were laid out so they could be poured.

As she grew heavier by the day, it became obvious she wasn’t going to be answering many more, if any, emergency calls with Doc. Mel had no babies due, and while she was in town every day, she came later in the mornings. And her husband was never very far from her side.

When Mel and Jack left the bar together at the end of the day, Paige leaned against Preacher and whispered, “I can’t wait until we’re like that.”

“Fat?” he asked, chuckling.

“Fat, full, ready to pop with a new baby. I’m thinking of going off those birth control pills,” she said.

“Anytime you’re ready,” he said, putting his arms around her. “I told you, I’m in all the way.”

“Hmm, that’s so nice. I’m going to give Christopher his bath while you finish up and close the bar.”

“I’ll be up in a minute,” he said, giving her a loving pat on the rump.

It was this time of day that Preacher had come to regard as the magic that made his life work. Every little
piece of it. He liked the act of cleaning his kitchen and never failed to feel grateful for all that was his. Had he not been here, working the place for his best friend, he would not have found Paige, and Christopher, who had become his son.

He locked the door and went upstairs to Christopher’s bedroom and, finding him already in the bed, waiting with his book, Preacher sat on the bed beside him. Chris crept closer, climbing up on his lap and touching the pictures in the book while Preacher softly read. Before long, the little guy slept and Preacher was able to kiss him, tuck him in and turn off the lights.

In his own room, he found Paige in front of the bathroom mirror brushing out her hair. She wore her pajama top, which came to her thighs. He came up behind her and moved her hair over one shoulder to kiss her neck, running his big hand up her thigh to her hip, finding, much to his liking, that she was naked under there. It wasn’t as though she had to be psychic to anticipate him—he wanted her all the time. She wanted him to want her, and she let him know.

His hands crept higher under the shirt until he held one breast in each hand. She leaned her head back against him and hummed in pleasure. He pulled his hands out and slowly began unbuttoning her top, watching himself and her in the mirror. Her right arm came up, reaching behind herself to his shoulder, and curled her hand behind his neck. Her top unbuttoned and hanging open, he slipped one hand inside to cup her breast while his other fell over her soft pubic mound. And he looked at their reflection. Her head turned, she rested against his chest with her eyes closed, one arm lifted high above her head to embrace him, the other resting lightly atop the arm that had captured her breast. He never dared hope for this—that he would be half of a couple, a handsome, erotic, loving
and perfect couple. And something surprised him—he didn’t look scary at all. He looked like a man in love, a man holding his woman with sure, strong and gentle hands. And his woman leaning into his embrace, filled with desire for him, her lips parted slightly in a soft sigh. Sighs that would soon become powerful as she gave herself over to him completely. Within her adoring, he had flourished.

Preacher had no idea he could be like this—so sexual, so confident, so deeply in love. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head. “Baby, I’m going to make you feel so good.”

“I know, John,” she whispered. “I know.”

The night that Mike Valenzuela lay in bed and listened to Jack toss and turn after the loss of Liz and Rick’s baby, he knew it was time. And yet—time for what? He had no interest in going back to L.A., though his family was due a visit. There was nowhere else in Virgin River to stay. But three months in the same small space with Mel and Jack was already too much—though you’d never know they felt a strain.

That night he knew. They had to have their home back. That had provoked thought, which stimulated ideas.

He’d come so far—his right arm was stronger, his shoulder pained him less. His hand had a decent grip. He couldn’t cast with the right arm yet, but he saw hope for that because he could now shoot a pistol with his right hand as long as he gave it an assist with his left. Added to that, he had perfected his left-arm aim with both the rifle and the pistol. He could easily keep up with Jack, who was a decorated sharpshooter.

This was the place for him, he realized without much surprise. He didn’t know what he’d do here, but it didn’t really matter, because he could retire if he wanted to. He
had his disability, his pension. And it cost nothing to live here. Until something changed in his head, he wanted this easy life in a small, uncomplicated town. By the time Jack was ready to frame his house in early summer, his right arm and shoulder would be strong enough to help. He’d add to the menu at Jack’s with his own fish; he’d help around town where needed. He’d live as Jack and Preacher had lived, at the center of a town that appreciated their good works and loyal friendship.

Now when he stood in front of the mirror, stripped to the waist, he saw a muscled chest, shoulders, arms. His right side was still smaller than his left around the shoulder and biceps, but it had come a long way and was barely noticeable. Sit-ups were easy; he had his six-pack back.

It was easier to pee, thanks to a round of antibiotics prescribed by Mel. But that other thing—it might be gone for good. He’d had two false alarms, waking up with a good pee hard. He’d gripped it like a drowning man, filled with hope. But, nothing. It just went back down, like the docile memory it had become. He was afraid to hope, but being a man, he held out for a miracle.

So, Mike drove to Eureka, where he bought an RV—his new home. It was his goal to be free and clear of the cabin before the baby came so that Jack and Mel could have their life back. He could park it anywhere he was needed—behind the bar, out at Mel’s cabin, even on the property on which Jack was going to build. When he drove it into town, towing his SUV behind, he pulled it right up to the front of the bar. It was the end of the workday—dinnertime. Preacher and Paige would be cooking, Rick would be working, Jack and Mel would be having that after-work drink with Doc. Friends and neighbors would be gathering soon.

He extended the bedroom and living room walls with the pop-outs and pressed the switch for the awnings, for
the full effect. Once these walls were pushed out, the bedroom and living room became comfortably large. Then he honked the horn, bringing everyone out on the porch.

He jumped out—sans cane for weeks now—and stood in front of the RV, leaning against it. Mel was the first one out, Jack close on her heels.

“My new apartment,” Mike said.

“When…? What…?” Mel stammered.

He reached out his left hand to help her descend the porch steps. When she was down, he dropped an arm around her shoulders. “I wanted to get out of the cabin before the baby—it’s time to put that nursery together and I’ll help do that.”

“But where are you going?” she asked, looking up at him with eyes that had suddenly grown moist.

“I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart. I love it here. But I need my own house. More important, you need your own house.”

And when he said that, she fell against him and wept.

“Aw,” he said, putting his good arm around her. “I hope those are glad tears.”

She lifted her head and looked up at him. “I didn’t want us to lose you,” she whispered. She wiped impatiently at her eyes. “God, I’m sorry. You have no idea what it’s like to be this pregnant. My emotions are like a landslide.”

“Naw, I’m honored, Mel. You guys—you’ve been everything to me these last few months. I started thinking I’m well enough to go home—then realized that this feels like home.”

She hugged him tightly around the waist. “I’m so happy to hear you say that.”

“Want a tour?”

“Of course. Jack,” she said, “get Preacher, Paige and Rick.”

When Rick came out on the porch, his face split in a
huge grin and it filled Mike up inside. Rick had been coming along real well since his loss, but the goofy kid the Marines had all come to think of as a little brother had been replaced by a somber and quiet young man. “What the heck?” Rick asked.

“My new digs. What do you think?”

“I think that’s awesome,” he said, jumping off the porch to join the tour.

They combed through the RV, admiring the accoutrements. Full kitchen with a nearly full-size refrigerator, freezer, washer and dryer, roomy bedroom with a queen-size bed, large closet that occupied a whole wall, large bathroom with a two-person shower, TVs in both the bedroom and living room with roving satellite reception. Plenty of cupboard and closet space for a bachelor and storage compartments underneath.