Shaxoa's Gift (3 page)

Her head turned to gaze at the front door.
She looked back at me and reached up to place what I think was
supposed to be a comforting hand on my shoulder. Her frown turned
into a pain-filled grimace and her body jerked suddenly. Quickly,
she tore her hand away and stepped back. “I have business with the
Elders.” Without a backward glance, she was gone.

Her reaction to touching me, and her abrupt
departure, left me staring at the plain wood door.
If Uriah is
what I truly want?
Of course he was, I told myself firmly. I’d
already told her that. More than what she said, her reaction to me
bothered me even more. Right away I thought of Uriah’s painful
reaction to touching me, but that didn’t make sense. She’d touched
me plenty of times before, a hand shake or pat on the shoulder, but
she had never reacted like that before. There must have been some
other reason.

I wanted to ask her about it, but what I
needed was an explanation of what was happening. Why did she offer
me advice, only to run away right after without explaining anything
to me? I had no answer to soothe my simmering frustration. I would
never understand Quaile, but I did wish that I could trust her.

“I don’t believe her,” I said. “She knows
where Uriah is and what he’s doing. Why won’t she tell me?”

“I can’t even begin to understand that
woman,” my mother said.

Despite not being born into the Native
American Tewa tribe, my mother had still always held a great deal
of respect for the Elders and the traditions of the tribe. To hear
her refer to Quaile as “that woman” surprised me. Something had
definitely happened to put Quaile at odds with those who had always
considered her a sage advisor.

“What happened while I was asleep?” I
asked.

My mother’s step faltered, but she wrapped an
arm lovingly around my shoulders as she sat down next to me.
Holding nothing back, she told me of how my father had gone to the
Shaxoa, the tribal witch, and poisoned my tea with the herbs she
had given him. She told me how Quaile told them there was an
antidote, but only my Twin Soul could administer it.

Quaile had given Uriah hope that he might
keep the bond from forming, only to betray him later when she
revealed that Daniel’s blood had to be mixed into the antidote. The
thought of having Daniel’s blood inside of me was disturbing, but
nowhere near as sickening as hearing of what Quaile had done to
Uriah. I had been right to mistrust her words.

Hugging me when her tale was done, my mother
whispered once again that everything would be alright. I was
grateful for her honesty, but there was still so much I didn’t
understand. “Where is Dad?” I asked. Thoughts of where I hoped he
was, somewhere painful and terrifying, floated through my mind.

My mother bristled at my words. “I sent him
home,” she said. “He’ll be dealt with, don’t worry.” Letting her
anger fall away, she smoothed my hair. “Uriah’s mother said that
you are welcome to stay here as long as you want. Or I can send
your father to his sister’s if you want to come home right
away.”

I knew it must have been hard for her to
offer to let me stay away. My mother was my best friend aside from
Uriah, but given the choice, I couldn’t go home, not when I needed
every reminder of Uriah I could get to stave off the overpowering
urges of the Twin Soul bond.

“I think I’ll stay here for now, Mom,” I
said. My words came out as a whisper.

Her lip trembled only slightly, but her words
said she understood. “Alright, Claire, whatever you need. I’m here
for you. I always will be.”

“Thanks, Mom. There’s just so much I still
don’t understand. I feel so lost without Uriah.” I wondered where
he was, what he was thinking, even as I struggled not to think
about Daniel at all. In the past year, the only time I ever had to
wonder what Uriah was thinking was when we were apart. Uriah’s
expressive face revealed every thought and emotion. Not knowing
what he was doing brought fresh tears to my eyes. I pushed them
away quickly. Crying wasn’t going to help me.

“Are you hungry, honey?” my mother asked.

I knew she was trying to distract me, and I
appreciated the effort. My mouth felt dry and sticky, but my body
craved nothing but Uriah, though a large part of my mind was still
screaming for Daniel. “Food sounds great, Mom,” I lied.

Rubbing my arm briskly before standing up, my
mom waited for me to follow. Slowly I stood, taking a deep breath.
The worn wooden floorboards creaked softly as we crossed the living
room. I looked toward the kitchen and saw the familiar row of
pictures lining the low wall cabinet near the kitchen door.

I saw my own face dotted among the many
family photos and felt Uriah’s lack of presence even stronger. One
photo in particular halted my steps. Uriah and I were posed between
his parents. Uriah’s father, Notah, had his big arm around my
shoulder and wore a pleasant smile. He had always treated me like I
was already part of his little family. I stared at the picture. It
looked perfect, exactly how life was meant to be. The doubt that
held me in its grasp had me wondering whether I would ever see my
happy ending.

I looked away from the photo, turning back to
the living room and staring into the fire. The warmth from the
fireplace should have been much too hot for the late summer
afternoon, but I let it wrap around me. It was a poor substitute
for my sweet Uriah’s arms. My mom, who had stopped beside me, put
her arm around my shoulder and gently urged me to continue toward
the kitchen.

Sliding into a chair at the smooth, butcher
block table, I ran my fingers along the edge of the wood. Uriah and
I had spent so many afternoons sitting at that table. Every inch
held memories of Uriah helping me with homework, us feeding each
other homemade snacks that didn’t always work out quite right, and
so many other beautiful hours spent together.

“Here you are, Claire,” Sophia said, setting
a steaming bowl on the table in front of me. The thick soup smelled
delicious, but I could only dip the spoon in and out without ever
bringing it to my lips. It took several minutes before I realized
that my mother had left the room. Glancing around, I met Sophia’s
eyes without meaning to.

Since waking, not one person had been able to
look at me without their face frowning with pity and sadness.
Sophia’s eyes were steady and serious. Holding my gaze, Sophia sat
down at the table across from me. For a long while, she said
nothing. The silence should have been uncomfortable, but Sophia
seemed to radiate strength and confidence. I sat quietly, praying I
could soak up even a portion of her ability to face a challenge
with such poise.

“You’re stronger than you think you are,
Claire,” Sophia finally said.

My eyebrows rose, questioning her assessment.
“I don’t feel strong. I feel like I’m about to collapse into a
miserable puddle of sludge.”

Sophia smirked. “You look like you’re about
to collapse into a puddle of sludge.”

I leaned forward, letting my hair fall over
my shoulders to hide my face. Sophia’s sure hand touched my chin
and lifted my head up so I was facing her again. “He’ll be back,
Claire. And when he comes back, he’ll find an even stronger Claire
than he left behind.”

“But what if he doesn’t come back,” I asked.
Salty tears escaped from the corners of my eyes.

Sophia’s smile was warm and comforting. “Do
you really believe Uriah would abandon you?”

“No,” I said, “I don’t.”

But he almost did, didn’t he? What had made
him change his mind?

“Then don’t worry about it again,” Sophia
said. Sitting up straight, she reverted to her usual no-nonsense
manner. “Now, Uriah’s mother still needs help around the house. I
have other patients that need tending to, and if you’re going to be
staying here, I expect you to do your share.”

“Of course,” I said quickly. “I’ll do
whatever she needs me to.”

Uriah’s mother, Lina, was still mending after
being attacked by a starving mountain lion a few days earlier. The
damage would leave behind massive scars, but only a few days later
I had no doubt she was probably already speaking of the incident as
if it were no big deal. Only a few hours after the attack, when I
had seen her, she was more concerned about me and Uriah than
herself.

I suspected that her casual attitude was
mainly for Uriah’s sake. He had been across the ranch when the
deranged cat found and attacked Lina. He blamed himself for what
happened to her, and with the stress he was already under trying to
run the ranch without his father, Lina would do anything to lighten
her son’s burdens.

“You know,” Sophia said, “most people around
here think that because I left the pueblo to become a nurse, I’ve
turned my back on my Tewa heritage, but they’re wrong.”

I was embarrassed to admit that I had thought
of Sophia in exactly that way. The way she argued with every word
our tribal shaman, Quaile, said and turned her nose up at talk of
legends and myths, I would never have guessed that she cared at all
about her Native American heritage. In fact, I’d often wondered why
she even came back to the pueblo. She could make a much better
living in Albuquerque than in San Juan.

“I have studied what little writings there
are left about our tribe. I love the stories and myths I grew up
hearing, and I believe in many of them, including Twin Souls,”
Sophia said.

I couldn’t resist interrupting. “Then why do
you argue with Quaile so much and put down the legends people tell?
I thought you hated all of those things.”

Sophia didn’t even flinch at the accusations.
She had probably faced the same questions many times before. “No, I
don’t hate any of it. I’m proud to be Tewa, but I guess I see
things a little differently than other people do. When I hear
stories about Twin Souls, I don’t hear a story about how love
conquers all, I hear a warning about letting your life be
controlled by what someone else has told you must be.”

Sophia’s hands reached out for mine and I
immediately took them. “I believed that Twin Souls were real even
before this mess your father created, but I never believed that
finding your Twin Soul would bring you any greater happiness than
simply falling in love with the person you chose yourself. Love has
to be earned in either case, and I believe you and Uriah have
earned the right to be together regardless of what anyone else
might say.”

“But these feelings are so strong, Sophia.
Half of me wants to run after Daniel and the other half is begging
for Uriah to walk back through the door. My head and heart feel
like they’re waging war with each other, and I don’t know which one
will win,” I said. “If I slip even for a second, I can feel Uriah
starting to fade from my mind. I don’t know how to fight against
something like that.”

“Yes, you do, Claire. You've been fighting
since the poisoned tea touched your lips. Keep Uriah close to your
heart and he’ll never slip away,” she said. Releasing my hands,
Sophia stood and turned back to the stove. “Eat your food, Claire.
It will make you feel much better.”

I watched Sophia walk away. I believed what
she said. Real love was earned. Turning back to the soup, I lifted
the spoon to my mouth. My tongue tasted nothing, but I emptied the
bowl, hoping to gain a little strength from it. I felt like I was
back at square one when it came to earning Uriah’s love. Even if I
had to begin from scratch, I would prove to myself and everyone
else that I still loved Uriah and would never turn my back on
him.

3: Direction

The desert landscape blurred around me. Scrub
brush melted into the sandstone bluffs beneath a perfect blue sky.
I wasn’t sure how long I had been driving, or even where I was
going, really. Hano, Arizona, held a remnant of Tewa Indians who
had fled New Mexico, seeking escape from the Spanish conquerors.
Hano was out in the middle of the Arizonan desert. I had stopped
for directions, but what I was riding toward was still a mystery to
me. I didn’t know who or what I was going to find there.

The idea of being around other human beings
sent a shiver down my spine. Two days ago I had been happily
engaged to Claire, dreaming of the day we would be married. Now, I
wandered the desert with a thin promise from a woman who had
already betrayed me twice. I had one last chance to rescue Claire
from the embrace of the Twin Soul bond.

My childhood had been filled with Tewa myths
and legends, but finding out that they were more than simple
stories was too much to bear. I could hardly look at the casual
passerby and not want to shake them, scream at them that they were
the ones living in the fantasy, happily thinking that there was
nothing more supernatural to their existence than the power that
made text messaging a part of everyday life.

If Twin Souls had been the only myth to come
to life, perhaps I could have handled that, but with one came more.
Not only could the woman I cherished be torn away from me by a man
the universe deemed a more perfect match than I, but Shaxoa’s
potions truly produced wicked results, shape shifting monsters
fought my every effort to save the woman I loved, and stories of
men boding and communicating with their animal brothers were
manifesting themselves as if commonplace in the modern world.

For the last, I was actually immensely
grateful. As I struggled to rein in my emotions, my cougar
companion was searching the desert hills for my pursuer. Talon had
been the first to offer me his help, though even he did not know
why he was drawn to me. I felt safe knowing that every animal in
the area had been alerted to the dangerous Matwau’s presence. Even
though the Matwau had lost its chance to destroy Daniel before the
Twin Soul bond could form, he had made it perfectly clear that he
would come back for me.