Shattered Dreams (23 page)

“
Mom, you do know everything
will be all right?” I say, as I continue to watch her
pace. 

“
Alec, your mother won’t
rest until the baby is here and both mom and baby are
healthy,”
Dad says. 

Raelynn comes up to James and asks, “Do you
want to color with me?” 

James and Rae go to the empty table where she
lays her coloring books and crayons out.  

I look over at Emma, “Ready to meet the rest
of the family?” 

Emma takes my hand and I walk her around the
room introducing her to my two brothers and their wives. They all
give me a look but don’t say anything. My parents are the only ones
who knew I was seeing someone. I smile when they make pleasantries
and Emma points to James and tries to introduce him from afar.
Everyone seems to get along and it doesn’t feel awkward at
all.  

“
Is the coffee fresh?” I
ask 

“
Mom just made it,” Blake
says.  

Emma and I get a cup of coffee and join
Raelynn at the table. I watch her fold a bright yellow piece of
construction paper in half. She uses different color markers and
colored pencils to draw with. I watch as she opens up the card and
writes something on the inside. When she is done, she smiles and
hands it to me. I look at the card and see that she wrote “Happy
Birthday, Baby” on top and drew a picture of balloons and a cupcake
under the words. I open up the card and read, “I love you so much,
Raelynn.”  

“
It’s beautiful and I think
the baby will love it.” I lean over to kiss the top of Raelynn’s
head. Her hair is so soft and smells fruity.
Molly always used Herbal Essence Shampoo on her and Raelynn’s
hair. 

I explain to Emma that my sister and her
husband didn’t want to know the gender of the baby, so it will be a
surprise to all of us.  

Ian opens the door and announces that Cameron
is close to delivering. He looks pale and his normally immaculate
hair is messy. My mom doesn’t want to go back into the delivery
room while Cameron gives birth. I think being the wife of a surgeon
she knows all too well the possibility of something going wrong. Of
course, usually nothing goes wrong. 

Victoria and Jill stand up excitedly. “Can we
still be in the delivery room?” Jill asks. 

“
That’s why I’m here.
Cameron said to take tons and tons of pictures.” 

Victoria waves her very large and very
expensive camera and smiles. “I have it under control.” 

Mom walks over to Ian and
cups his face in her small hands. “Ian, you have not started to
live until you become a parent. Everything that was important to
you before fatherhood will now take a backseat to your child. If
you have a girl, you will find yourself buying
My Little Pony
toys instead of the
latest version of
Grand Theft
Auto
.” My mother wipes a tear from her
cheek. “I want you to know that I couldn’t have chosen a better
husband for my daughter or a better father for my grandchild.” Mom
stands on her tiptoes and kisses Ian on both of his
cheeks. 

“
Thank you, I hope you are
right. I hope I can be the man you expect from
me.” 

“
Ian, you already are. Now
go and welcome the newest member of our perfect
family.” 

I watch as Ian, Victoria, and Jill walk out
of the room. Dad hugs mom and comforts her as she cries softly into
his chest. 

“
Daddy?” Raelynn asks, as
she tugs on my shirt.  

I look down at her big blue eyes. “Yes,
Rae?” 

“
What’s
today?” 

“
It’s December
26
^th
.” 

“
The baby’s birthday is
December 26
^th?
” 

“
Yes, Rae, I guess it
is.” 

I watch as Rae writes the date on the card
she made for the baby. 

“
It won’t be long now,” I
announce.  

“
Ok, I hope it’s soon. I
want to see if it’s a boy or a girl.” 

“
Me, too,
Rae.” 

Mom and dad come sit with us and Raelynn
shows them the card she made for the baby. My mother sits Raelynn
on her lap and hugs her. “Raelynn, the baby will love this
card.” 

“
Thank you,
grandma.” 

My mother and father both
talk openly to James and Emma like they have known them their
entire lives. James shows them the picture of a ninja he drew and I
smile. My mother ruffles his blond hair and smile adoringly at him.
They include Emma in the conversion about my sister and Ian not
knowing the gender of the baby. Mom also explains this will be her
5
^th
grandchild and how her children are making her
old.  

My sisters-in-law
open the door and stand there with the biggest
smile on their faces. We all stand and Jill announces, “It is a
beautiful little girl, 7lbs, 8oz, and she is 20 inches
long
.
She is
completely healthy, especially her lungs, judging by the noise she
makes.” The room erupts with squeals and cries. Raelynn claps her
hands and jumps up and down.  

“
Oh, praise Jesus,” my
mother says, and my dad hugs her. 

Victoria walks around the room, carrying the
camera and showing off the pictures of the baby. Mom and dad go
back and see the baby first. Emma says that she and James will wait
here for me while Raelynn and me see my sister and the baby girl.
She thinks another time will be better for her to meet them. I
didn’t think about that, but I have to agree with her. My sister,
Cameron, would not be happy meeting someone for the first time,
just minutes after giving birth.  

Rae and I wash our hands first and then we
walk over and kiss and hug my sister before we see the baby. I look
at Ian, who is smiling and holding the baby. “Have you decided on a
name yet?” I ask.  

“
We did; we decided on
Savannah Lynn, after Raelynn,” my sister says, looking at
Rae. 

Raelynn smiles and walks over to my sister.
“Aunt Cameron, you are going to name her after me?” 

“
We are. Since your Uncle
Ian and I love you so much we want our baby to have your
name.” 

“
Just like mommy and daddy
named me after them?” 

“
Yes, Raelynn, just like
that.” 

“
May I see
her?” 

“
Here, Raelynn, sit over
here,” Ian says, standing up from the chair.
“Just remember to support her head.”
He demonstrates how to properly hold the
baby. 

I walk over and watch as he gently places the
baby on her lap. Rae smiles and I get my phone out to snap some
pictures. The baby has a headful of black hair. Rae gently touches
her small hands. “Look, daddy.” I look down — the baby is so tiny.
“She is smaller than my baby doll.”  

“
She sure is. May I see her
now?” I gently take the baby from Rae’s lap and hold her up to me.
I walk over to my sister and smile. “She is beautiful,
sis.” 

“
Thank
you.” 

“
How are you
feeling?” 

“
I’m tired, but I’m a mom. I
feel wonderful. I was always meant to be a mom.” 

“
Yes, you were. I remember
all those baby dolls you had, and you and mom would have to change
their clothes twice a day, every day. Once in the morning for the
day and again at night for bed.” 

“
Poor mom. She sure did have
her hands full.” We both laugh at the
memory.  

I kiss the baby and hand her to Cameron. “We
need to get going.” I shake Ian’s hand to congratulate him before
Raelynn and I leave to get Emma and James and go
shopping.  

We go into one store and we soon realize that
day-after-Christmas shopping isn’t for us. We leave the store empty
handed and decide a day at the park is a better idea. The more time
I spend with Emma the more I like her. She tells me she just bought
her first house this year and that she has lived with her parents
since her husband’s death four years ago.  

I tell her that she is the only woman who has
been around Raelynn other than Molly and that I enjoy her company.
We spent the day at the park and then we walk on the beach
afterwards. 

I have to work the next two
days so I call Emma and confirm that I will be picking her up for
the wedding. For the first time in a long time, I am excited about
going out. I take Raelynn to my mom and dad’s for the night. I
don’t need to pack her an overnight bag because my mom has a
dresser full of clothes for Raelynn and her other grandchildren.
She also has items such as toothbrushes for her
grandkids
.
I walk
into the house, and my mom and dad stare at me.
“What?” 

“
Nothing, it’s just you look
so handsome.” I readjust my gold tie and pull down on the sleeves
of my white dress shirt. I decided on a midnight black suit to wear
to the wedding. 

“
Daddy has a date,” Rae
giggles as she runs through the house to the
playroom. 

“
It’s not a date, Raelynn,”
I yell, so she can hear me. 

“
Alec, you have a date?” my
mother asks, walking over to me.  

“
I’m taking Emma to Angel
and Mason’s wedding. Her son is in the wedding. It’s not really a
date, is it?” 

“
It sounds like a date,” my
father says. 

“
How old is her son?” My
mother asks. “He looks to be about four.” 

“
Yes, he’s four. They are
both taking the beginners taekwondo class. Look, I hate to be rude,
but I need to get going.” My mother leaves the room and my dad
walks me to the door. He asks, “Do you have flowers for her and a
gift for her son?” 

“
No, do I need
them?” 

“
Only if it’s a date. Alec,
you never show up empty handed and if she has children, you get
them something, too.” Dad always treats mom right. I think he
learned some things from watching Cary Grant and Fred Astaire
romantic comedies with mom. Mom once said that watching those
movies automatically turn men into better boyfriends and husbands.
Watching Rock Hudson romantic comedies, not so
much.  

My mother shows up at the door with a gift
bag in hand. “Here, take this.” 

“
Mom?” 

“
It was on sale and I picked
it up after Christmas. You can’t show up there empty
handed.” 

“
I know, dad just told me.
Where do I get flowers on New Year’s Eve?” 

“
Marjorie’s Florist is open
late tonight. I spoke with her earlier today. I’ll call and tell
her you are on your way. Now hurry and have fun.” 

My mother walks away with her cell phone in
hand. I lift the gift bag and smile at my dad. “She has it all
covered, doesn’t she?” 

“
She always does. Have fun
and call us if you need anything. I love you,
son.” 

“
I love you, too, and thank
mom for me,” I say, raising the gift bag
again.  

I stop by the florist on my way to Emma’s and
pick up some flowers. Marjorie knows me by name and already has a
huge bouquet of flowers waiting for me. I arrive at Emma’s house,
and I suddenly become nervous. My palms become sweaty, and my pulse
picks up. I have never been nervous around Emma. I gather the
present mom gave me for James and the bouquet of flowers mom
ordered for Emma. I look up at the porch and the lights are on and
the front door is closed. Taking a deep breath, I get out of the
car and walk up the few stairs to her front door.  

The door opens before I can knock and James
is standing there in his three-piece suit looking very
distinguished. “Hi, James.” 

“
Hi,
Alec.”  

He opens the door and I peek in. “Where is
your mother?” I ask before walking into the house. 

“
She’s getting
dressed.” 

Emma walks out of the back room wearing a red
dress and carrying a pair of black heels. “James, get your shoes
on, please. Alec will be here at any minute.” 

I smile when I realize she doesn’t know I am
here.  

“
Yes,
momma.”  

She looks at the door and smiles when she
sees me. 

“
Hi, please come in. I
didn’t know you were out here.” 

“
Thank you.” I walk into the
house and stare at her. Her long curly blond hair against the red
dress is beautiful. The dress is red silk, above the knee with a
sweetheart neckline and long sleeves. “You look beautiful.” I watch
her and I can see the blush on her pale cheeks. 

“
Thank you. I was just going
to say the same thing about you. You look great in a
suit.” 

“
Thank you. Here, these are
for you,” I say, handing her the huge bouquet of flowers. My mother
is a generous giver of flowers, even when I am not the one paying
for them. 

Emma smiles and takes the flowers from me.
“Thank you, these are beautiful. Please come in, I’ll get these in
water. Do you want something to drink while you wait? I’m running a
little behind.” 

“
No, thank you. I’m fine.
This is for James. I’m not sure whether you want him to have it now
or later.” 

She stops and looks at the gift bag I am
holding. “You got my son a gift?” 

“
I can’t take the credit. It
was my mother’s idea. When I dropped Rae off at her house, Rae told
her I had a date and mom insisted I bring something. Emma, I sound
like a complete idiot, and I want to apologize now. I haven’t been
out on a date with someone
in a very long
time, and all this feels very foreign to me. If I say or do
something stupid, please understand, it’s not my normal
behavior.”